Quantcast
Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 26
  1. #1
    Tonysweetie Guest

    Default Parrinoid, scared, help!

    I'm a total parrinoid freak! DH works night shift, gets home shortly before midnight so I'm by myself some nights (I go my Moms alot or friends) I'm fine until about 9ish and I start to panic. We live in a 1 bedroom apartment so we have neighbors all around us but I still get nervous. If I hear any type of noise I flip out! I grab the cell phone and the regular phone and go see what caused the noise. Most of the time it's jsut my cat but still. It's so bad that even if I want to go in the kitchen which is away from the front of the apartment and cook lunch for the next day I get nervous being away from the main part of the house and afraid someone will break in and I won't hear them coming in. I won't even shower when DH isn't home. I will not dare go to bed until he gets home either for fear of falling asleep and someone coming into my house w/o me knowing. I want to get a dog to help with security but our complex only allows 30 lbs. or less dogs and I don't think a little dog will be much better than my cat, lol. Also, if someone calls my house and I answer and they don't say anything or hang up I think it's someone trying to find out if DH is home or not. I mean all they have to do is figure out which car is DH and see it gone the same time everyday. Is this werid? How can I calm my nerves? Some nights I'm fine and others I freak!!! I find myself surfing the net a lot to keep my mind off of it. TIA!!!
    Last edited by Tonysweetie; 10-05-2005 at 01:43 PM.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Atlanta
    Posts
    4,964

    Default

    Go find yourself a counselor! Seriously and I don't mean that in a snotty way. Most people are a little nervous being on their own for the first time, but when you cannot live normally (i.e. shower, sleep, move to another room, etc.) and when you literally panic when you're by yourself, there's something else going on there. It's not healthy for you to feel that way being by yourself when there's no reason for it (like bad neighborhood, prior break in, etc.)

    A good counselor will help you figure out why you feel such panic at being alone and help you work through it. He or she will also help you with tips and tricks that will give you a more secure feeling when you're alone.

    Karen

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    2,454

    Default

    I don't think it is abnormal to be nervous when you are home alone - I know I get a bit freaked when I'm home by myself. What I usually do is lower the blinds in the house (so no one can peak in) and make sure I check the locks on the door. I do have a dog - she is only 27lbs, but she would certainly make sure that I knew if someone was coming. Even without her there, I do feel better when I've done the above

    Also, I think I recall (back from the WC) that you bought a puppy and returned him shortly after you got him. Let me say that unless things have changed drastically, please do not buy/adopt another dog until you are absolutely sure you are ready. Dogs are a HUGE responsibility and, IMO, definitely alter your life/lifestyle. If you do get another dog, make sure you thoroughly research what you are getting yourself in to.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    9,062

    Default

    Regarding the hangup phone calls - do you have caller id?

    Do you live in a neighborhood that is prone to crime/breakins??

    I am not saying you have nothing to be worried about but maybe you are working yourself up more so? I would make sure all your windows are closed/locked and that your doors are locked.

  5. #5
    Tonysweetie Guest

    Default

    I don't think I need to see a councelor (it's not that bad) like I said it's just some nights. I mean I do live normally when he isn't home. I will clean the house, go run my errands, go to the gym, have freinds over, play with my kitty, etc. but some nights I just freak out! I think the reason I have this fear is b/c we do lie next to a bad area (not real bad but no uncommon to hear something bad happening) and also when I was like 12 I was babysitting (when I had no fear of being alone) 4 kids in my Dads friends hosue and someone tried to break in. It was awful! Ever since I've had this fear. Plus watching the news doesn't help...

    BethIrish: I'm not going to get a nother dog, I would like to have one if we had a better living situation aka:a big yard and a easier way to take the dog out. Living upstairs in a small apartment makes it sorta hard thats why my cat and my turtle are great, lol. Thanks though!!!

    celicacutie81: No we do not have caller ID we do not have it to save on expenses, but I wish we did! We don't live a IN a bad area but right next to one. All of my windows are locked at all times. My front door is double locked. DH installed another lock so I could feel safer.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    4,945

    Default

    Have you posted about this before or was that someone else?

    I agree with Karen's suggestion. You can't live your life like this. If you don't control this, you will only teach it to your children when you have them.

    Phobias are treatable. Ask your doctor to recommend a therapist who specializes in them.

  7. #7
    Tonysweetie Guest

    Default

    ejs: no I've never posted this before b/c DH just started working night shift. He used tow ork day shift and it didn't bother me one bit (plus I work in teh daytimes) but he's been on night's the past couple months and it's taking time getting used too. I've never had to deal with being alone. My Mom had this same problem when I moved out and my Dad works the same job and works nghts but she' sfine now so I keep hoping it'll get easier. It has gotten better since the beginning. Liek when the first week I was a mess. I wouldn't even stay at home, I'd be at MOms every night til' like 12:30 but now I stay home almst everyday. Expect Fridays. I don't really feel the need to see anyone b/c like I said it has gotten easier but I still get nervous.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    California ♥
    Posts
    499

    Default

    Sounds like anxiety/panic attacks to me. I used to get them when DH worked nights and I was by myself in a small apartment in a state where I knew NOONE. I feel your pain!

    What helped sometimes is that we have a dog. Not for protection (she's a JRT) but for company. If your doing something, you'll be fine, but if your like me, you'll start thinking about it and that in itself is an anxiety attack.

    I only get them when I am alone, especially at night. And they aren't all the time. I told my doctor about this and he said it was just my body's way of telling me i am too stressed, worried etc. He also said it tends to stem from some kind of depression, or walks hand in hand with it. I personally couldn't see a counselor due to insurance issues, but my doctor made me feel alot better, and not so alienated. It happens to ALOT of people, check the anxiety board here in Emotional Support.

    PM me if you ever want to talk!
    Last edited by Mandos*Bella; 10-05-2005 at 02:13 PM.
    *A & A Est. 10.16.04*
    *A + A = B 10.14.07* & Teething!

    We ♥ October!

  9. #9
    Tonysweetie Guest

    Default

    Mandos*Bella Glad I'm not the only one! Like right now It's 5:15 and I'm fine. I'm about to change and go to the gym whenI finish my school work and then I'll come home and watch Friends and eat dinner and about that time is when I start getting nervous. lol. It sucks! Yes I know what you m ean about company. My cat helps so much! I do have something to do tonight to keep my mind off of it, I'm gonna make my turtle a new aquariam set up. That'll be fun, lol. But anyways thanks I will check out that thread. I think my problem is reall I think wayyy to much. I do this with other things too. Like before a medical appt. I worry for days they'll find something wrong and then the day I have the appt. I get extremely nervous abotu it. I get that from my Dad hehe. But anyways thanks!!!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    9,062

    Default

    I am not going to dismiss your feelings but maybe to ease your mind have a tv on in the next room, just so there is some type of noise. Or keep a hall light on. I have a lot of mini-nightlights in a plug in every room so there is some type of light and its not just pure darkness.

Similar Threads

  1. Too scared to sleep?????
    By MrsSpencer in forum Infants & Babies - 0-12 months
    Replies: 30
    Last Post: 05-14-2008, 11:19 PM
  2. Scared and need advice
    By Blondie in forum Pregnancy, Labor & Postpartum
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 01-11-2008, 08:34 PM
  3. Do you like being scared?
    By jesvet in forum ChitChat
    Replies: 54
    Last Post: 10-22-2007, 01:13 PM
  4. Scared silly.....
    By chloechloe in forum Pregnancy, Labor & Postpartum
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 03-19-2007, 09:11 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •