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Thread: Our Fab 40's

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
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    Default Our Fab 40's

    Welcome! This thread is for those of us in our 40's, but we welcome those approaching and those who have already experienced the joys of 40. This can be a place to share, vent and find support for all the "fun" that comes along with this new decade!



    I'll go ahead and start. I turned 40 in January, but didn't really notice any changes until a few months later. My metabolism started slooowing down and my periods started getting a bit wonky. What worked for me to lose and/or maintain weight, either watching what I eat or exercising used to work. Now I have to do both to see any changes. So basically I have to work a lot harder.

    The time between my cycles is a lot shorter (averaging 22-23 days) with an occasional 30 day in there. And then this weekend I had some crazy cramping that I have never experienced before.

    I'm also noticing my skin is changing too. I need more serious skin care to keep things looking firm these days.

    Looking forward to having a place to vent and support each other!
    K&K 10.5.02
    E 3.8.05
    M 6.24.09

  2. #2
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    Thanks for starting this Katie The effing 40's as Leslie called it!

    I'm 42 going on 43. As far as weight goes, I've always had a hard time losing, so that isn't too different for me, it's just a bit harder now.

    For me, the biggest change(s) seem to involve my hormones, or more specifically, my moodiness :/ My cycle is still very regular and normal (every 28-30 days), so no changes there. But, it is VERY heavy now...... like worse than when I was a teenager. That actually started to happen after having kids so I don't know if it's age related, or related to pregnancy. Either way, it sucks.

    Also, I mentioned in the other thread that I now have terrible cramps during ovulation. I never had that before but now, it is way, way worse than PMS cramping. Also, I find my mood is awful during ovulation- I am so irritable and cranky, it's not even funny. I don't get too moody during PMS (never have), but mid-cycle I am a mess now. Like I can seriously track ovulation based on how moody I am.

    Another thing I have noticed- I am starting to get night sweats..... not every night, but a few nights per week. And, I have a hard time staying asleep. I wake up often throughout the night. Part of that has to do with the fact my kids are terrible sleepers (DS2 still wakes every single night), but I also notice I just wake up on my own all through the night. I am able to fall right back asleep which is good, but it still sucks to wake up so much. **I have heard that sleep issues arise during perimenopause so I'm wondering if that is what is going on here.**

    I haven't noticed a change in my hair or skin yet.

    Oh, and my libido has definitely gone down. Again, not sure if that's related to age, or, just the fact that I am a mom with 3 kids and I feel tired and stressed most of the time. When I finally do get quiet time, the last thing I want is to DTD.... I just want to be alone and read or watch TV! Don't get me wrong- I still throw DH a bone, it's just feels like more of an obligation as opposed to me being the one actually wanting it..... I sound terrible!!!

    Hmm..... can't think of anything else off the top of my head.
    Last edited by steviem; 10-05-2015 at 05:18 PM.
    S+B Est. 11.09.02
    DS1 06.28.06, DD 07.23.08
    DS2 03.07.12

  3. #3
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    I'm 44. I definately have a harder time loosing weight since I've hit 40 and my libido seemed to tank a bit before I turned 40. I had surgery to correct prolapse about 4 years ago, but lately I've been feeling that yucky sagging feeling so am wondering if it's due to having a cold for so long now. I think I really need to focus on some core strengthening exercises to see if that will help at all..especially since I've been experiencing quite a bit of incontinence lately. I feel like I'm falling apart. I was considering just having surgery to had my bladder lifted or whatever they do, but don't want to rush into that so I'll start with other alternatives first.

    The only thing I've got going is that I had a partial hysterectomy when I had my surgery, so no periods (however, that does not help me figure out where I am menopause wise!).

    ETA:also I need a lot more sleep than I used too! I swear I cannot stay up til 10 even! I am usually in bed around 9:30 and get up around 6 or 6:30. I do tend to wake up a lot during the night and usually if I was up from4am on I'll just get up.

  4. #4
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    I'll be 43 in 19 days. Gulp!

    My periods themselves were not a big issue but for the past 3 years I was having horrible, horrible PMS for the entire second half of my cycle. Awful breast pain (I'd have to put on a second bra before taking off the first because even a second of "free boobing" was excruciating), and mood swings that had me fearing for my sanity...and for my marriage.

    So a year ago I decided to go on the pill continuously, and it changed my life! I was losing half my life to PMS/PMDD (2 weeks per month!), so stabilizing my hormones was huge for me.

    The downside of hormonal birth control, which I had not used in 18 years (I had a paraguard IUD and then had my tubes tied after two ectopics), is that it pretty much kills my libido. So I've been working on maintaining intimacy in my marriage and find that it's just the "getting started" part I have trouble with, but once we do, it's always awesome!

    I have no idea when menopause may hit me, and maybe it came and went while I've been on the pill, but I have no desire to stop taking it to find out!


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    J + A

  5. #5
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    I'll be 41 in a week and a half. I'm on hormonal bc for endo so I'm not having any of the period issues, thankfully. But I know my mother had a horrible time all through her 40's and still hadn't completed menopause, so she had a hysterectomy sometime in her 50s.

    I AM experiencing the joys of a decreasing metabolism and accompanying weight gain.

    I've also noticed a lot of fine lines around my eyes and sunspots, or whatever it's called, on the sides of my face. I just bit the bullet and am trying some Rodan and fields. I'll let you all know if it's worth the price tag. 😉

    And I love how the title of this thread is "Fabulous Forties" but all of our answers are "effing forties"! 😂
    Twins! Benjamin and William arrived 3.17.10

    Food Blog: Savory Secrets

  6. #6
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    Oh count me in. I turned 40 in January too.

    I've noticed my cycles are still pretty regular in so far as they are 26-30 days apart but now they last FOREVER! As in I'll have about 2 days of spotting, 2 days of light flow, 1-2 days of heavy flow, another 1-2 days of light flow and another 1-2 days of spotting...so at least 7-10 days! That's way longer than normal for me. Lovely.

    This year I found my metabolism slowing more than usual. I've managed to lose some weight more easily than I have expected but I've had to make some big changes to my diet. I've just started working out again but I feel like I'm losing some elasticity in my skin. I've never had cellulite before but I think I have some now. Lovely.

    I've had some prominent forehead wrinkles for a while now, and have noticed a lot more around my eyes. I feel like my eye lids are sagging a bit too. I have pretty long eyelashes and lately they will leave smudges on my lids after a few hours. Lovely.

    I also feel like my memory is waning. Maybe I'm just juggling too much (likely) but I feel like if I don't write things down I'll forget them. I have about 10 running lists on my phone (to do list, grocery list etc). I think I'm overly sensitive to memory issues since my grandma had early onset Alzheimer's... But I'm usually sharper than this. Lovely.

    Luckily I'm still super funny and have cooperative hair.

  7. #7
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    sky You made me remember that I went through an awful moody period about 5 or 6 years ago maybe? I'd go ballistic when it was not really called for- it was awful! I never thought about hormonal birth control for that.

    Wrinkles- yes, I'm there and I've also noticed lately that my cheeks are getting saggy so I'm getting jowls. Getting older blows!

  8. #8
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    I'll be 41 next month. I'm very active and run constantly, I'm getting ready to do my 5th half marathon of this year next week. However, my weight has.not.budged in the last year. I eat well and am clearly active but my body seems to have just settled into where I am. I would love to lose 8-10 lbs, not because I need to but because I want to, but I'm just not willing to kill myself more than I already do to accomplish it. I'm terrified of the day I get injured or something happens and I can't exercise because if I'm only able to maintain with this level of activity I know I'll be in a lot of trouble if I become less active. My metabolism definitely tanked after about 35.

    My skin has changed drastically as well and I have yet to find a miracle product to help. I have developed crows feet and some smile lines which are whatever. That was just a matter of time. My mother and both grandmothers have/had very significant under chin waddles, which is what I'm most terrified of. I'm not above plastic surgery to take care of that when it becomes an issue. I live in heat and humidity most of the year. I can't deal with having vneck and low cut shirts becoming off limits due to a waddle. But, more importantly I have developed pretty significant eyelid dermatitis. My lids are often very red, scaly and painful. Wearing eye makeup it torture when I want to dress up because there's no way around the dry patches. I've found some organic products which help with that but they don't address aging so I've had to choose between the two. A trip to the dermatologist a few years ago was essentially useless and came with the caution of "We can clear it up but it will just come back". Ugh

    I've noticed my cycles becoming wonky as well. It seems each month it shortens by a day for the last few months and are only about 4-5 days as opposed to my normal 7-8. I've never been textbook regular so it's hard to say if that's due to aging or not, but I'm willing to be it's related.

    I had my big "I'm getting old" meltdown at 35. I was actually looking forward to turning 40. I can't say it's been awful but I hate having to put time, energy and thought into things that were previously just after thoughts.
    Married 10/16/04
    "If our thoughts are worth a penny, what are our dreams worth?"

  9. #9
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    I'm 43 and noticed the weight gain too - blah! I'm so glad to hear that ovulation camps are normal - I keep googling things like ovarian cancer. They're brutal.

    I will say though that there are a lot of great things about being 40. I feel like I'm really good at my job and at a stage where I have so much experience that so many things just roll off my back because I've seen them play out before. I laugh sometimes at the new professors who are freaking out about stuff that I know just doesn't matter.

    I also feel like I don't really care what others think. I've got my posse of good friends - like you women and others near and far, and it's good.

  10. #10
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    I'm 42 and it's definitely harder to get the scale to budge. I'm seeing little signs here and there of skin changes - especially more blemishes.

    In terms of self-confidence, I agree with Pine Tree that I'm comfortable in who I am now (something that I sensed starting in my late 30s).

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