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  1. #381
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    6,491

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    I'm so sorry.
    But then the a couple hours later the hospitalist told us we needed to decide right then if we wanted to reinsert his feeding tube (which he's been ripping out), or switch to sugar water, because "we need to start making these decisions". And after that she ordered morphine to sedate him. (!!!) We refused the morphine. We had not been consulted before the nurse was given the orders. Feeding tube plans are up in the air until we have a family meeting with all the staff this morning, which was offered by the floor nurse when I went to ask WTF was going on. My dad is only able to respond to us sometimes, and he has answered both yes and no when asked if he wants the tube.
    This part bothers me. I would be bothered by the lack of information being given to you. The last thing you want to do it rush any decisions and then look back later and wish you had the time to process and digest additional/complete information. I'm glad you his the pause button and rejected the morphine. Even if you and your brother choose to go that route later today, it's good to slow things down until you can talk with everyone and make the decision you all feel at peace with. HUGS
    Loving my DDs and DS

  2. #382
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Whoville
    Posts
    7,985

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    Big, big hugs semily. Whatever decisions you make it's clear that you have the best interests of your dad at heart.

  3. #383
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    1,890

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    Thinking of you semily. I'm so sorry you all are going through this, you and your brother are doing an amazing job of advocating for your dad. I hope you get more helpful answers about the direction to take today. Big hugs.
    K&K 10.5.02
    E 3.8.05
    M 6.24.09

  4. #384
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    1,551

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    Semily, I am so sorry that you and your family are going through all of this. You and your brother are amazing - the care you are giving your dad is so loving. Thinking of you and your family as you make these difficult decisions.

  5. #385
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    20,270

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    Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry you are dealing with all of this. Your situation is pretty similar with ours with my FIL. One minute we were talking about recovery plans and chemo and the next minute it seemed like, everything changed to just comfort care. It happened so fast, and he went downhill so fast, none of us felt like we were able to get a grip on the full situation. I agree with the others that you guys are doing an amazing job advocating for your dad. I really hope you are able to get some peace with the best possible outcome for your dad's comfort and care. It is so, so difficult.
    isabella noelle :: 12.7.09

  6. #386
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Upstate, NY
    Posts
    16,413

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    I'm so sorry to read the updates. I hope that you are able to have an informative meeting this morning and like VASLPs idea of asking what Pallative Care's weigh in on the situation is. Hugs to you. Your head must be spinning.

  7. #387
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Boston
    Posts
    6,317

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    I'm so sorry, S. I second VASLP's palliative care recommendation and hope they can help guide you.


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
    J + A

  8. #388
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    2,456

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    I've got nothing to add to what the others have said. I'm so sorry, this is all so incredibly difficult.

  9. #389
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Somewhere in the swamps of Jersey
    Posts
    1,875

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    I'm so sorry, semily. We experienced this last year with my FIL, and the palliative care team was amazing. My thoughts are with you.
    "And as cliche as it may sound, I'd like to raise another round;
    If your bottle's empty, help yourself to mine
    Thank you for your time...Here's to life!"
    - Mekong

  10. #390
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    2,713

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    Oh my gosh, guys, this outpouring of support is overwhelming. You are all so amazing!

    Things are feeling waaaay more in control. We have a better nurse today, but the biggest change is the hospitalist on staff is a firecracker that gets.shit.DONE. We have our family meeting set for 2:00 today. We already had an in depth conversation with her, and the palliative care coordinator. Vaslp - thank you for recommending that. We reviewed everything that has taken place, what we want, what we're unhappy with, etc. She had seen us last week in the ICU during rounds so had some background on his case. They do not have neurologists on staff at this hospital, so we are going to do a skype consult with one shortly. An MRI is being done right now to assess blood flow to the brain. They are referring to him as a stroke patient now.

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