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Thread: Girl Drama

  1. #21
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    Pine, that is so sad Girl drama is awful, and unfortunately, it happens to boys too. I wrote in another thread last week that in my son's class, several of the boys were being rude and excluding one particular boy who was eating by himself. My DS ended up sitting with him for a bit and then actually told the teacher the other kids were being mean. It's just so sad.

    My son has also been dealing with some issues lately. It's not bullying per se, but the kids are seeing that DS is timid and meek and they are taking advantage of it. DH and I have been trying to talk to DS and telling him he needs to stand up for himself. Last night we brought up the idea of martial arts again. We'd thought about it last year but DS was resistant. Now, he seems to be warming up to the idea. It's just so hard as a parent to watch this happen. Again, my son isn't being bullied, but, there are a few kids saying crap that can be hurtful and DS needs to learn to shut it down and he just won't right now. He says nothing back. We've role modeled things he can say but I still think he stays quiet.
    S+B Est. 11.09.02
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    DS2 03.07.12

  2. #22
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    Pine, while the situation sucks it's nice that the teacher recognized it and asked your daughter to help/step in.

    We still have the two girls in our neighborhood who are very exclusive and like to randomly tell people they can no longer play. They like to target MDD because she's younger. They will tell her only 3rd or 4th graders can do something (ODD is in 4th and another neighborhood girl is in 3rd). This was after MDD was already playing with them. I don't like that shit. We've told ODD that if they pull that again, she either has to stick up for her sister - and say either she needs to play too - or walk away.

    If this were a case of not wanting to include MDD from the beginning, I can understand that. But, not after everyone has been playing for an hour. Ugh. I wish they'd just move away...
    Kidlet 1 - 8/06
    Kidlet 2 - 7/09
    Kidlet 3 - 12/12

  3. #23
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    Wow, so I'm posting here AGAIN. This morning DD wore a dress I got her in Paris and I offered to do her hair in this cool twisty bun that I saw a few girls have while I was gone. It was very easy and looked great and she really liked it --she usually hates when I do her hair

    After school though she told me that someone put a note in her desk that said "brush your hair". BUT she said that she didn't care and she liked her hair. Her teacher has a box where kids can put notes for their Friday class meeting, so DD wrote a note to go with it and put it in the box. The teacher was very upset and brought it up with the class.

    But I am SO proud of DD. She was totally fine about it and we talked a lot about why someone would do that. She handled it great and I tried to give her lots of positive feedback for handling it so well. I think she was actually proud of how she dealt with it.

    Hopefully this is the end of it and not the start of something worse...

  4. #24
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    Someone told my 1st grader about Bloody Mary (something about a girl in a mirror) at lunch yesterday. She started crying and begged her to stop and she didn't. She was so upset she didn't eat dinner and she was up until midnight crying.

    DH and I told her she needed to tell the girl that she really scared her and to not tell those kinds of stories around her and the girl said 'I don't care about your feelings'.

    I guess I should reach out to the teacher. DD2 scares really easy and once she gets something in her mind, she can't stop thinking about it.


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  5. #25
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    wow! I'm so sorry for both of your daughters. I hope the teachers help the situations.

    3rd grade was pretty bad for DD last year but since then 4 girls have left the school and 1 has joined. Not that the girls that left were problems by any stretch, but their leaving prompted a mix-up of the friend groups, that combined with them all working together on the play for the last 2 months has really bonded the class together. There are only 12 girls in the class/grade, so it could be really bad; instead, it is really good.

  6. #26
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    Pine Tree I can't believe that at this age kids are already this mean and sneaky! I can see saying that to a girl's face, which is certainly mean, but the kind of mean I would expect to see at this age. But an anonymous note? Wow! That is awful! Good for your DD on handling this so well.


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  7. #27
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    So different kind of girl drama is about to happen around here. DD's best friend will be moving out of state in the next couple of months. DD and this girl have been in the same class since kindergarten (3rd grade now) and were play buddies before that when their older siblings were on the same t-ball team. DD has had other girls in her classes that she has called her best friend, but this girl has always been right in the mix and especially over the past year, they've become favorites of each other. I'm not sure how to prepare DD or how to handle communications between the girls after the move.

  8. #28
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    Default Girl Drama

    Oh that's hard Scarlett. No advice because I haven't been through it. But DD2's best friend, who lives two houses down - her parents divorced this year and the friend said they may move. So although the two of them have had plenty of time together this summer I've also consciously made sure for her to have play dates with other friends to help develop other friendships - just in case. I still haven't heard anything, though!

    Since you have a couple of months, maybe when you tell your DD you can ask her who else she wants to play with and try to get them together?

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  9. #29
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    THIS! Ugh, my heart breaks for your daughter, Pine.

    Quote Originally Posted by dragonfly_71 View Post
    Pine Tree I can't believe that at this age kids are already this mean and sneaky! I can see saying that to a girl's face, which is certainly mean, but the kind of mean I would expect to see at this age. But an anonymous note? Wow! That is awful! Good for your DD on handling this so well.


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