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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Upstate New York
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    Default Planning a bridal shower-in a different state?

    I was recently asked to be my BFF's MOH.
    She will have 4 other BMs (her sister who's in college, his 2 sisters, 1 of which lives OOT, and then another friend who lives hours away), and my DD will be FG.

    The wedding is not until Feb 2011.

    I need to plan her bridal shower, but I have no idea where to even start since I'll be doing it from 3 + hours away. I know i need to set a budget, and guest list, but then what?

    Since the bride will be moving to the other side of the country, we figured doing it the weekend before Thanksgiving would work out best, so I need to get moving on this now.

    Has anyone planned a shower from another state?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
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    20,270

    Default

    I assume you mean Thanksgiving 2010?

    Are any of the bridesmaids local? I would start by contacting them to find out who is willing/able to help, what $ they can contribute, etc.
    isabella noelle :: 12.7.09

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
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    Default

    I've done several showers in other cities, including ones I have never been in prior to the shower.

    I am assuming you are trying to do something ASAP, but I would think a shower over a year in advance is well, not too appropriate. An engagement party would be a better option.

    That being said, I found it easiest to host the party/shower at a food providing location...a restaurant or country club or even just renting a party room at a hotel and having it catered. Then you can do very basic decorations, etc.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Upstate New York
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    Default

    Sorry I left out some information!

    I'm thinking November 2010.

    I think the only person in the bridal party that is local is her sister.

    Another question I just thought of, their 2 families live on opposite sides of the state. His side will definately have more people than hers, so should I try to find a place in the middle, or closer to her side?

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
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    Default

    If it's November 2010, I think you're pretty early on the planning process. That said, as far as location geographically, I would ask the bride what general area she prefers. I would also ask her about the guest list but then given the geography situation, as her about the # invited vs. the number she thinks will actually attend.

    I think hosting at a restaurant or venue that provides food is also a good bet, although it can be slightly more expensive depending on the location (like a function room w/ catering vs. a restaurant that has a private room).
    isabella noelle :: 12.7.09

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
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    Default

    Have you talked to the bride about this? Are you sure you need to have only one shower to handle everyone? It is fairly common to have multiple showers...one for her family, one for his family, etc.

    I have to laugh, I've never spent even remotely close to a year on planning a bridal shower. You may not have enough info to do anything for many many months. Honestly, unless you are trying to book an exclusive place, I'd hold off for another 6 months, then figure it out.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
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    6,604

    Default

    I planned the bulk of my wedding in the New York area from another country. Here are some of my tips:

    1. I disregarded any vendor that didn't have a website. If I couldn't look online or send email, I couldn't be bothered with organizing phone calls to handle the time difference. I tried it once to organize the transportation from the reception to the hotel and it was a mess because I was calling in the evening, and vendors that were unavailable until the afternoon in their time zone were off my list.

    2. Delegate, delegate, delegate! I had my mom deal with the flowers, I had a general idea of the color I wanted for my bouquet, but didn't care if I got roses, dahlias or lilies. Inspiration pictures were key, especially if you need to do some table decor.

    3. I also had to give up on doing some projects, no one was the wiser and I am glad I had time to spend with family and friends instead of doing projects.

    4. Determine if there is a location that you can send supplies to. For example, I shop a lot on line for clothes via American websites, and ship the stuff to my mother's house. When I visit, I bring a suitcase packed in a suitcase and bring stuff back with me. You could do the same with favors for example, order them and send them to someone who lives in the location where the shower will be. They can also be recruited to do light assembly if needed.

    I think it's also way early to start planning anything now, chances are a location isn't even taking reservations this far in advance unless it's very exclusive. You will need to get an idea of who's paying for the shower, when I was in my cousin's wedding about 10 years ago, the MOH planned the shower, then told us to come to the planning session with our checkbooks. Now, at the time I was just out of college and didn't have two pennies to rub together, so I told my dad, who told my aunt, who got very upset that the MOH did this. So, just get the agreement up front on who's paying for what.

    Good Luck!
    Instead of having "answers" on a math test, they should just call them "impressions," and if you got a different "impression," so what, can't we all be brothers?

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
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    2,845

    Default

    Andrea - what a nice MOH you are!!!
    Like others pointed out, it is early (although I know how you like that ) Has the Bride to be given any indication of what she wants? I already know in our case the Bride is going to have two seperate showers (talk about preplanning..... ) and we (the upstate BM's) will just be hosting/paying for the one here.
    Good Luck!!

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