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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Cali girl stuck in Indiana!!!
    Posts
    787

    Default Asking for money instead of gifts

    I have a friend of mine that is getting married in Montego Bay in October and wanted to know how to say that they dont want gifts but money instead?
    Sofia Grace 8/12/11

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Northern VA
    Posts
    1,690

    Default

    There is only one way to do that - DON'T. Unless she wants to offend a majority of the invited guests.

    Bottom line is that MOST people will give a check instead of a gift simply b/c of the location. No one is going to pack a blender and carry it on the plane with them.

  3. #3
    jimmysgirl424 Guest

    Default

    Yeah, we never said that we preferred cash and I'd say that about 98% of our guests gave us cash/checks. And we did not have a destination wedding.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Chicago
    Posts
    5,592

    Default

    Yep, you don't. She can also not register, which will help give a bit of an indication.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    4,945

    Default

    She cannot say that at all. It would be very rude.

    People will give what they want.

    Proper etiquette says that guests should never take a gift to the wedding (no matter where it is located), it should be mailed ahead of time.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    The Whale's Vagina
    Posts
    4,021

    Default

    She can't. Ate least, she can't without being rude and offending people.

    Gifts are gifts. You don't get to dictate what people *give* you.
    'Thou shalt not' might reach the head, but it takes 'Once upon a time' to reach the heart.-Philip Pullman

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Cali girl stuck in Indiana!!!
    Posts
    787

    Default

    Thanks Girls! That is what I though too. Because she told me that she has everything she needs as far as stuff that you would normally register for if you didnt have a house yet. I will definately tell her.
    Sofia Grace 8/12/11

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    20,270

    Default

    Well she doesn't have to register, but that doesn't mean it is appropriate to ask for cash.
    isabella noelle :: 12.7.09

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Hotbed of liberal elitism
    Posts
    582

    Default

    I know a couple that did this (as I recall, they worded it in a bizarre little poem in the wedding invitation). It came off as weird and tacky.

    ETA: There are honeymoon registry sites like http://www.thebigday.com/. This is basically a way of asking for money (ostensibly for your honeymoon) while trying to make it sound less tacky.
    Last edited by Yvangeline; 06-05-2008 at 12:23 PM.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Plano, TX
    Posts
    1,901

    Default

    IMO, the most she could do is try to let her intentions spread by word of mouth.
    Giovanna
    DH ~ 2001 | DD ~ 2006 | DS ~ 2008

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