Hi. DH and I are expecting in March 2006. We are at the beginning stages of exploring various options. I ran the idea by my sister who tends to keep toward conventional medicine and she was totally unsupportive of going the au natural and midwife route. I don't think it is an all or nothing experience, I would just appreciate if you could share yours. It would be great too if you have experience with both! DH is really encouraging the midwife and my sister says that he isn't a woman and doens't know better. Please share! Thanks!
I am also a March 2006 mother who is planning to be treated by a midwife rather than a traditional obstetrician. It's very important to me that my pregnancy and birth experience have as little medical intervention as is safely possible. The midwife I will be seeing works with another midwife in an office with three ob-gyns. She also delivers in a hospital. I feel very confident that if a medical situation arose which requires the expertise of a physician, I will be referred to one of the three in her practice.
You can cite her training to your sister, you can cite statistics of how midwife-assisted deliveries are as safe as those of any OB, how their C-section rates, use of vacuum extraction and foreceps is lower, that labors ar often shorter, etc. However, in the end, it's really your decision and your sister should not decide who handles your prenatal care.
Thanks for you input. Yes, of course it is the decision for my DH and I to make. Just in talking to her, she left me feeling so unsettled. That also highlights the fact that I haven't done nearly enough homework on my own or our own to make a qualified decision and that is why I was hoping others could share their experiences -- as a starting point.
And, yes I did notice your name among the March 2006 mommies. Glad we are in that club together. H&H 9 months to you or the remainder of that!
We are using an ob (even though the practice has 3 midwives) but opted to hire a doula. We are hoping for a more natural birth, not sure what that means for us yet. I love my doctor so I didn't really see a need to involve the midwife and DH was more comfortable with an actual doctor. But I knew we would have little chance of a 100% natural birth without a doula there to support us, especially if my doctor doesn't do the actual delivery, which is very likely.
Sure our doula thought it was a little strange that we didn't go with a midwife if we want to go natural, but after talking to her about it at the interview she is comfortable we made an educated decision.
ETA: Sorry that was confusing why I shared my story. I guess I would think about why you want to use the midwife. If you want to go more natural, then I would definitely consider one. But there are alternatives if you and your DH end up with an ob.
Elenitsa, first off, huge CONGRATULATIONS on your pregnancy! I remember you from the charting threads.
Next...is your sister a birthing expert? Does she work in the medical field?
I assume not.
I think this is a decision for you and your husband, and not your sister. Personally, I chose a midwife (who works in an office and hospital setting) for many reasons, and I'm happy with my choice. My father-in-law tried to talk me out of it later, and while I respect his opinion, I made my choice after a lot of thought and research.
For me, I chose a midwife because:
- I really want to avoid an unncessary c-section, and I know my midwife is committed to that as well. (Of course I would have one if it was needed.)
- I've never given birth before, and I want someone to stay with me and let me know what to do the entire time. A doula is also a good option for this. For myself, I just decided that having one caregiver seemed like a better way to go. I didn't want to be in a situation where the doula and OB disagreed about something.
- I don't view birth as strictly a medical process. It is in part, but it is also a physical one that I need to be physically and mentally prepared for and then supported during the process. I would rather have someone who has a midwife mindset than a strictly medical mindset.
There are also really good reasons for choosing an OB. For example, I am very lucky so far in having a low-risk pregnancy; if things weren't going so smoothly, I'd be over at the OB immediately. I think it's just about what makes you feel comfortable...not your sister. You're the one having the baby here.
The practice I'm going to has both midwives and traditional ob/gyns and you can choose which side to see. I'm going with the midwives side of the practice so I've scheduled my appointments to see all 4 of them multiple times since whoever is on call will be the one to deliver me. They're all great women and are very supportive. I like how they explain everything they are doing and take the time to show me things like how to feel the baby's head. I'll deliver in the hospital's Family Birth Center which is actually connected by a walkway to the clinic I'm going to. I'm excited for the birth and I'm hoping I'll have a better chance of having a vaginal birth (preferably without an epidural) by going with the midwives.
I'm due in August and I made the decision to go with a midwife as well. She also delievers in a hospital where OB/GYN are available if any problems were to arise so I felt safe with my decision. I like the fact that it has felt like she has taken a personal interest in what I want to happen at my delivery. I don't plan on going through without meds and she is okay with that. The bottom line is that I felt comfortable with her and that is very important when you are embarking on this wonderful journey. I remember asking around and getting horror stories as well as great experiences with Midwives it truly is what you feel more comfortable with and what you *invision* your birth experience to be like.
I also used a midwife for my first and only pregnancy and the experience was wonderful. She was very kind and took the time to answer all of my questions without ever making me feel like she was in a hurry or that I was asking stupid questions. I hadn't decided to go unmedicated and she was fine with that. In the end, my labor was quick (5 hours exactly) and went very smoothly. My midwife kept me clued in to what was going on during every second and made me feel very relaxed and taken care of during my entire experience.
Married October 19, 2002~~Bryelle Morgan July 19, 2004~~Kaden Michael April 15, 2007
I'm in my second pregnancy assisted by MWs and to tell you how strongly I feel about MWs, I drive 30 mins each way for my appts. and 1 hour to the only hospital where they deliver - it's just that important to me.
I'm a firm believer in natural childbirth and I wanted to spend my pregnancy being treated as a person, not a condition. Even before I ever got pg, I always preferred seeing nurse practitioners over OB/Gyns because I felt they took more time with me and weren't in a rush.
With DD1, I went to a practice w/4 MWs and a few Docs. I had to see a Dr. once, per their policy. I distinctly remember that my appt. w/her was faster, no questions were asked/answered and she barely looked me in the eye. Then, of course, there was my MW who, by the end of my pregnancy was hugging me! I gave birth to my DD in a hospital, but never say a Dr. the entire time I was there. I did have a doula (which the MW supported) and had a great experience achieving the natural birth I dreamed of.
With DC#2, we live in a new area and it was harder to find a MW - I'm actually traveling out of state to do so! Anyway, the practice I'm with now requires me to see all the OBs and the 3 MWs in equal rotation and I'm already not thrilled w/that. In my visit w/the OB he came in the room, told me I had GBS and was going to need IV antibiotics during delivery, asked a few questions and that was it. Yesterday, my MW went over ALL my lab work with me, discussed the GBS and told me I wouldn't HAVE to have the antibiotics, that we would retest, etc., brought my Mom and DD back to the exam room to hear the HB - talked to them - and generally just spent more time with me.
If you want to do some research so you have some fact-based info. for family skeptics (I dealt with plenty of those in my first pregnancy too!), try visiting sites like midwiferytoday.com, midwife.org or acnm.org. You will find that for low-risk women, the outcomes w/midwife assisted births are SAFER than w/an OB. You will be less likely to have unneccessary interventions and more likely to be made a PARTNER and not just a PATIENT in your birth experience. If those things are important to you, I would urge you to select a midwife. You may deal w/some criticism from friends/family, but in the end, it's your body and your choice.
Just wanted to bump this thread and ask for more feedback and experiences. A friend recently got me thinking about midwives and I'm just curious as to whether it would be beneficial for us to consider one. I don't know a whole lot about what they bring to the birth experience and would love to hear more from those who have had one, especially with hospital births. TIA!
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