X-post from Careers -- Does anyone else really dislike their job/office?
I decided that this belonged in ES as well...
My question is: Does anyone else really dislike their job? Why? Can this be changed? Are you taking steps to change it? If so, how and what?
I work for a civil rights agency.
I hate my job. Well, I guess I should qualify that. I love the work that I do, but I hate my office. Hate is actually a light word. I ulcerate at the thought of going in every day because the atmosphere is so charged that a tuning fork would go off (DH calls it the "black sucking hole of unhappiness"). Favoritism is rampant, and because I stick mainly to myself and don't engage in love-fests, I'm not one of the favored ones. I do my job, and generally I'm pretty good at it. I produce (unlike other people in my office), and I don't ask for much. Usually I can power through the atmosphere here and ignore it because I enjoy the actual work so much, but lately, it's been burning me out. The reasons for this are many, one of the biggest ones being that a new person was just hired, at my exact level, with less qualifications (she has no MA, I do. She has no experience. I've worked here for 2 years), for $5000/year more than me.
I can't switch jobs right now because DH is active-duty Navy, and I know we're moving in 6-9 months, so it would make no sense. I need the money, so staying home isn't an option right now. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm totally miserable here, and, worst of all, I'm not being productive anymore because I simply don't care. At all. And, to top it all off, I am so damn tired all the time (probably because the atmosphere in the office is so depressing) that I can't even fake being interested. It's really bad.
So, any suggestions as to what I can do about this? I've started taking an LSAT course with an eye towards going to law school -- I figure it will at least make me feel productive and like I have a future -- which is good, but is also another ball of nerves because I am the only one in this class that's out of college and working (and has been for several years). So I'm in class for 8 hours a week with giggling 20 year olds who think I'm ancient at 26. It's laughable in a sense, but crippling at the same time. Plus, it adds to the tiredness because it's just so much sheer time involved.
Oh, and DH is deployed right now, so my support system at home is severely compromised.
Wow... were you peeking over my shoulder? I wish I had words of wisdom for you, but my words seem lame even to my ears... We are in the same situation, small variations, but the same... down to me being 28 and back in school (now that I know what I want to be when I grow up) and DH in a situation that will not allow me to quit...
Oy!
I just get through the days... I just say to myself, "Eyes on The Prize"... whatever that prize may be. For you, it's when DH comes home though that seems forever and a day away.
Also, I try to be proactive about the things that bug me the most. As for your salary, is there an HR person or boss to whom you can address it? "I'd like to talk to you today about my job performance. I'm informed that XXX was hired- with no experience and no degree- at XXX rate which is XXXX higher than myself in addition to the fact that I've worked here XXXX years. I need to know if there is something I have or have not done as an employee which prevents me from seeing such compensation with my considerable experience level and education so that a plan may be put in place to bring me up the pay scale as the matters are addressed (should you have any specific reasons)."
I *know* conversations like that are easier said than done in a small, non-profit job... but it is a place to start. I know that once i had that conversation (after swallowing a lot of fear) and got my raise, it was a little easier to get back to work.
Anyway, if you'd like to commisserate more, PM me or reply or whatever. YOu have my sympathy and I'll be watching your thread.
Amber
Celtic Knot Nut.... LiveJournal Convert, and now I'm falling into Constant Chatter
(a.k.a. "Aisling" at WC)
I'm so sorry that your job sucks right now. I have been there. I was so unhappy and would come home crying every night. Every Sunday I would get physically sick at the thought of going back. I finally left and got another job.
I agree with celtic about talking to your boss about your salary, but I wouldn't mention somebody else's salary in your discussion. That's always been a big no-no as far as I've heard. Just discuss the positive things that you do and if there have been any increases in your responsibilities or duties mention those.
Try not to let it get you down. It sounds like this is fairly short term for you. *hugs*
I too, hate my jobs, but because of the jobs themselves/location of jobs rather than the people. Fortunately for me, my bosses are great, if a bit absent-minded.
My DH has a career that requires lots of moving. Unforunately for me, that's lots of moving within our small-town ridden midwestern state. My B.A. is geared towards working in a much larger city (communications/pr/event planning). I obviously didn't know my DH when I began my degree program, or I would have picked something much more workable for moving/small town life, like teaching (so I could substitute!).
So, being in a tiny town where we know no one and I don't have kids (because THAT qualifies you to be employed in a small town. . . not to menion, is illegal to hire/not hire on that basis) and we aren't related to anyone, I am stuck working two PT jobs that are worthy of a responsible HS student or first year college student.
IT SUCKS.
I totally understand. I'm putting in my time because DH has great benefits, and once he makes his way up management, the salary will be enough so that I don't have to take a job I hate/overqualified for just to pay the bills.
I also could have written your post. I had a job I absolutely hated for three looong years. I couldn’t quit for various reasons, but I was so burned out that I just couldn’t bring myself to care about it anymore.
I don’t have any great advice, but there are two things helped me a little. First, can you plan on taking some time off when you move? I took nearly 3 weeks off between quitting my job and returning to school (at the age of 29), and I really recommend it. It’ll give you something to look forward too, plus you’ll need the time to decompress after being in such a bad situation.
Second, I once read something that helped me feel better. I can’t remember the exact details, but it was a study showing that when several people in an office are favored by management (like, get away with less work, take too much vacation, etc.), then the people who are hard workers eventually start feeling taken advantage of, and they stop working so hard. For some reason, that comforted me, b/c it showed that my feelings were totally normal and that it’s only normal to get burned out in a situation like that. It helped me be less hard on myself for feeling the way I did. Hope that makes sense.
I agree with the other posters about talking to your supervisor about a raise, but I wouldn't mention the other employee. I am not sure how you found out what salary that person was hired in at, but I'm guessing you're not supposed to know. I would just be prepared to discuss your education and your achievements at work and your reasoning behind why you believe you deserve more money.
I have been miserable in a job, and I know how terrible it is since so much of your time is spent there. I hope you can hang in there for a few more months and then find something much better when you move. As far as a support system, try and get together a couple nights a week with friends or family for dinner and hanging out. I'm sure they probably have similar stories to swap with you. I'm 26 years old too, and it never ceases to amaze me how many people my age I talk to that are unhappy with their jobs. So you are not alone - I just hope you can find something you like better. Good luck!!
Hello ladies! Thanks for the responses! Today the beef here is that I was 5 minutes late, and though I am almost never late, I was 10 minutes late at the end of last week as well. This prompted my boss to come into my office and start a conversation with me about how "when I come to work, I need to be serious about it and ready to work". I didn't realize that being late twice in an almost year long period signified not being ready to work. I hate this place.
BTW, the reason that I know the other girl's salary is that I was the one who had to hire her.
Replies
Celtic -- You're right, eyes on the prize. I just keep telling myself, it's really not for that much longer, and it will look good on a resume. That's my new mantra. I'm sorry that you're having trouble with your job, too. What do you do? Why is it so bad? And what are you in school for?
Katmg -- thank you for the support It's a good point about not mentioning the other girl's salary in my discussion with my boss.
Midwestern -- WOW. Much respect to you for being able to calmly (at least that's how it came through) take stock of your life and deal with less than ideal circumstances. It must be so lonely to keep moving from small town to small town. What does your DH do that necessitates that? I hear you on the kids thing, too. It's kind of the same where I work.
Silvergrey -- Thank you for that management study! It made me feel sooooooo much better. It's nice to know that I'm not crazy and I'm not alone. Yes, I think I will be taking time off when we move -- I'm planning to quit my job 2 months before we move so I have time to pack us up and to go visit my best friend for about 3 weeks.
Walton -- Yeah, why is it that no one our age seems to like their work? Not only that, but everyone seems to be in career flux as well -- it never fails that whenever I'm out to dinner with friends, the topic at hand is, "What are we going to do with our lives, and how are we going to do it?" Interesting. I guess it's just the age? I do try to get out at least 4 nights a week with friends, but since we're all pretty much in the same place emotionally with the career thing, we usually end up going around in circles. But it's good to talk about things and have some fun doing it
X-post from Careers -- Does anyone else really dislike their job/office?
Reply With Quote
