How do you find a good therapist?

[Foos6LA]

Lately my past and present issues with my upbringing, parents and family are starting to really affect my life and my relationship with my DH. I want to talk to someone professional and objective about this, so I looked up my insurance coverage. I am covered for x amount of visits, etc, so the next step is finding someone.

How do I find a therapist short of looking up my zip code on my health insurance's "covered physicians" webpage? I don't have any resources for recommendations and I don't want to ask coworkers. Any suggestions? Thanks!

[Smillow]

My husband and I were referred to a counselor through our RE's office (specializing in the reproductively challenged). We had wanted to seek counselling for a long time before but had no good way to find someone. I would look at the website and call a few therapists - I got a good vibe right away from ours and I was originally calling to see if she knew anyone in our area (her office is about an hour away) but it felt so good to talk to her that we made an appointment with her. Good luck!

[KarenS]

Get the list from your insurance company and start calling them. A good therapist will spend a few minutes (15-20) on the phone answering your questions and building a rapport.

For us, for example, one of the things that was important is that we wanted our therapist to be marriage focused - i.e. if there were serious issues that came out in our sessions we wanted him or her to be focused more on keeping the marriage together than on each individual. I also found out that DH felt he would be more comfortable with a woman therapist (that she would be less judging of him than another man). So i called all the female therapists, asked them about their experience in couples counseling, how they felt about working to save a marriage, etc., etc. I made an appointment with the first of the two who I seemed to "click" with most on the phone and who answered in a way I wanted to hear. It turns out that we really got along well with her and she became our counselor.

If I were going into individual therapy I'd ask questions that had to do with my specific issues: what's your experience dealing with children of alcoholics? have you worked with people with anger issues before? how do you feel about working with one individual from a married couple? are you willing to bring in the spouse if it's required at any point during the counseling and work with both of us? That kind of thing.

And finally, don't be afraid to switch counselors after a few sessions if you feel like the one you're talking to is not "right" for you or if you don't feel appropriate progress is being made. We love our couples counselor, but pre-DH when I was in counseling to deal with family issues, I went thru 3 therapists before I found one I liked who actually did me some good (i.e. I came out of the sessions feeling like something was being accomplished rather than feeling angry or frustrated).

Good luck to yoU!

Karen

[bluberry]

I've been going to a therapist off Spicewood Springs. There is a whole medical facility devoted to mental health over there. I really like my therapist and feel that she has been helpful. Want me to send you her info?

[BethElena]

Another good resource is your family physician. You can let them know what problems you're facing, and if there's a therapist they recommend that specialized in that...good luck!

[Foos6LA]

Hey Blu - Yes, please! Do you still have my email address? I may even know the medical center you are talking about. Quite a few names show up on Spicewood Springs. Thanks!!

[bluberry]

I PM'd you :)

[PG-rated]

The last time I saw a therapist, I found her through my insurance's EAP.

And I wanted to second what Karen said about not being able to switch if you don't have a good connection with someone after one or two sessions. I had at least two therapists that I spent far too long with, even though I knew they weren't really helping me. Don't be afraid to "shop around."

[laurenc]

ditto to what everyone else has said -- and to add, do a little research as to the different "flavors" of therapy. there are many philosophies that therapists take on, and some more than others may be more attuned to your and your DH's personal styles.

also, try calling a local hospital and finding out if they offer outpatient therapy. sometimes the outpatient psychiatry departments at hospitals offer more flexible payment options or scheduling options -- but, you may end up with intern or a "trainee" as your therapist.

good luck!

[springprincess]

Hey. I hope you don't mind me posting here-I just wandered in and saw your thread. You might check the major hospital websites in Austin for a doctor referral service. The Methodist Healthcare system has one online here, and it's so amazing. They list all the doctors in whatever area you want, in whatever specialty you want, and you can search for all male, all female, or both, and their little resumes usually list their specialties. It's a good place to start if you're starting completely from scratch.