Pregnancy after Infertility

[ART babies]

Welcome!

This thread is for those of us who are pregnant after being treated by a Reproductive Endocrinologist--taking fertility medications, doing IUIs, IVF, using donors or any other method of assisted reproductive technology

Just like conceiving was different for us than for most women, pregnancy is also a different experience. This is a place for us to give each other support, express the worries and fears and all the emotions that we go through.

This thread is also meant to be a safe place, just like the Still At It (http://www.constantchatter.com/showthread.php?t=192) and IVF (http://www.constantchatter.com/showthread.php?t=671) threads. Visitors are welcome, and reminded to keep their comments supportive and on-topic.

Your threadmistress: MSH

Note: When you post, remember to write how far you are along in the subject line. Since we're all at different stages in pregnancy, it will help us keep it all straight! Thanks!

To join, just post your stats in red:
Your Name & age
DH's name & age
children (if any)
TTC since ?
TTC issues
successful protocol
BFP date and/or due date
expecting boy, girl, or surprise


Members who are Expecting!

amychris03
Me: Amy (29)
DH: Chris (35)
TTC since 9/03
TTC Issues: PCOS, Tubal issues
due 3/26/06

Bottleored
Me: Caroline
DH: Paul
Married: 10.11.03
TTC: 1.04
TTC issues: immunity issues, m/c 9.05
Successful Protocol: Gonal-F, low dose hCG, Lovenox (blood thinner), Metformin, Progesterone
due 6.12.06

catJennifer
Me: 30
DH: 31
TTC since: 5/04
TTC issues: PCOS, elevated prolactin
conceived with injectibles (Follistim), IUI
BFP: 9/6/05
due ?/?/06

ds2003
Me: Carla 28
DH: N 32
TTC since: 11/03
TTC issues: PCOS, annovulatory
Conceived with ovarian drilling, metformin, Femara, IUI
BFP 10/9/2005
due 6/21/2006

Jad
K, 34
P, 33
TTC since 1/04, then 6/04
TTC issues: MFI (low morphology)
Conceived with IVF #2
due 6/20/06

jennylou
Me: 26
DH: 36
DS: Andrew Wyatt 5/20-5/22/05, also a clomid baby
TTC: July 2005
PCOS
conceived with 5th cycle of clomid, 100 mg pregnant 11/05!
due 8/6/06

jrsygirl
jrsygirl, 31
dh, 32
ttc since 3/04
ttc issues: uterine didelphys
conceived with IUI #1
BFP 8.18.05
Twins due 4.28.06

Kemorr
Me, 29
DH, 32
1 dog, 1 cat
TTC since - September 2004
TTC issues - Stage 2 endo, mild MF, mostly unexplained
successful protocol - IVF #1 with ICSI and AH
BFP 2/27
due 11/03/06

Lucy Van Pelt
Ginger 35
Brad 31
& our two year old cocker spaniel, Lucy
TTC since 4/1/04
TTC issues - PCOS, 2 m/c (9/05, 11/05)
successful protocol - metformin, baby aspirin, femara, prometrium
BFP 5/17/06
due 1/27/07

Maxicat
Kim 37
Rick 45
Married 05/11/02
TTC since 12/02/02
Dx'd High FSH (I mean really high), 3 failed medicated IUIs,
Lap done 08/05 extensive endo, Gave up 1/06,
PG natural cycle in 01/06 with accupuncture and waiting for menopause.
due 10/06

Sinclair319
Jen, 29 on 3/19
C, 24
No kids yet, just 2 furbabies
TTC since July 04
TTC issues: PCOS, male factor
successful protocol: 3 IUIs using femara, injectables, and IUI
BFP: beta of 111 at 13 dpo (2/25), 331 at 15 dpo (2/27)
6 w u/s: 3.13.06
due 11/06




In our thoughts and prayers

Astro
and her twin sons born at 16wks,
Steven Alexander (Alex) and Ryan Philip

Kimmiebride
and her son

MSH

CapeCod04

[ART babies]

Members and Our Long Awaited BABIES!!

Kelly's Girl
Me-31
DH-31
TTC since August, 2003
TTC issues: anovulatory. 3 cycles of Clomid failed to stimulate O. M/C after 1st attempt at injectibles/IUI
conceived with Injectibles and IUI
BFP 3/15/05
due 11/22/05
Need update!

angelgirl8
angelgirl8, 28
dave, 28
ttc since: 1/04
ttc issues: possible polycystic ovaries, possible poor egg quality
conceived with IVF #2
BFP: 6.2.05
Baby girl, 4lbs 14oz and Baby boy, 4lbs 2oz born 1/10/06!

kat
Me: 36 (will be 37 when they're born, we hope!)
DH: 41
TTC since 12/03
Dx: unexplained infertility
m/c (after getting pregnant w/out intervention) in 10/04
Four rounds of Clomid, all BFN
conceived with IVF #1 (June '05)
Alexander, 8lbs1oz, 21.5" and Audrey, 7lbs10oz, 20" born 2/15/06!

AusMarchBride
AusMarchBride, just call me Ann
me 39
DH 43
ttc since 3/03
diagnosis: unexplained infertility
conceived with IVF cycle #2
BFP 14.6.2005
Sarah born 27 Jan 06!

Bernie
Stacey, 30
DH, 34
ttc since: 1/04
ttc issues: unexplained
conceived with IVF #1
BFP: 6.29.05
Amelia Sara, 5lb 15oz, 19" and Maxwell Philip, 5lb 8oz, 19" born 2/24/06!

Christy5599
Amanda - 27
Matt - 30
TTC since 8/03
TTC issues - unexplained infertility
successful protocol - miracle on our 29th cycle of trying!
Patrick Aiden 8lbs 8oz 19.5 inches, born 3/9/06!

heidi0622
me: Heidi 29
DH: Mike 30
Married 6/22/02
TTC: 03/04 - unexplained IF, 1 m/c 10/04 at 5.5 wks
Acupuncture starting in April '05 and continuing throughout pregnancy
Conceived with 1st cycle Clomid 6/05
BFP: 7/12/05
Benjamin John, 7lbs 1 oz, 20in, born 3/13/06!


amygrrl
Amy 35
DH 33
DD Avery Elizabeth ~ June 3, 2005 ~ born still at 27 weeks
TTC since 2003
TTC issues: PCOS
Protocol you conceived with: MIRACLE!!!!!!
BFP date: 8.5.05
Malin Elizabeth, born 4/4/06!

Scooter
me 30
DH 33
ttc since 4/03
diagnosis: unexplained infertility, possible immune or fertilization issues
conceived with injectibles on IUI #5, with accupuncture, aspirin, and Folgard
BFP 8.18.05
baby girl, 6lbs 14.5oz, 20.5in, born 5.8.06!

[ART babies]

Pregnancy after Infertility Resources & Articles

articles from Resolve (www.resolve.org):
Emotions (http://www.resolve.org/main/national/pregparent/pregnancy/concep/conception1.jsp?name=pregparent&tag=pregnancy)

Mythsabout Pregnancy after Infertility (http://www.resolve.org/main/national/pregparent/pregnancy/mythfact.jsp?name=pregparent&tag=pregnancy)

article from WedMD Emotional Roulette: Pregnancy After Infertility (http://my.webmd.com/content/pages/14/81654.htm)

article from Shared Journey (http://sharedjourney.com): Pregnancy after Infertility (http://sharedjourney.com/pg.html)

article: Pregnancy After Infertility (http://www.infertilitycentral.com/fertility/pregnancy-after-infertility-resolutions.html)

article: Waiting for the Other Shoe (http://www.infertilitycentral.com/fertility/waiting-for-the-other-shoe.html)

blog article: The Bitter Girl's Guide to Pregnancy After Infertility (http://www.alittlepregnant.com/alittlepregnant/2004/10/the_bitter_girl.html)

PAILS of Hope (http://www.storknet.com/cubbies/pailsofhope/) (Pregnancy/Parenting After Infertility or Loss Support)
PAILS' FAQ (http://www.storknet.com/cubbies/pailsofhope/faq.htm)

article: Suggestions for Pregnancy After Pregnancy/Infant Loss (http://www.storknet.com/cubbies/pailsofhope/suggestions.htm)

article from Babyzone: Pregnancy after Infertility or Miscarriage (http://www.babyzone.com/features/content/display.asp?TopicID=40&ContentID=312)

INCIID's (www.inciid.org) links to forums for NICU support (http://www.inciid.org/article.php?cat=highrisk&id=371)


Multiples

The CC Multiples thread (http://www.constantchatter.com/showthread.php?t=1080)
Resolve's basic & advice info sheet (http://www.resolve.org/main/national/pregparent/pregnancy/multiples/index.jsp?name=pregparent&tag=pregnancy)

Resolve's Complications (http://www.resolve.org/main/national/pregparent/pregnancy/multiples/multiples1.jsp?name=pregparent&tag=pregnancy) info sheet

mothers' experiences: Parenting Multiples after Infertility (http://www.twinslist.org/inf.htm)


Pre- and Postpartum Depression

article: PPD and Infertility (http://www.infertilitycentral.com/fertility/postpartum-depression-and-infertility.html)

article: Depression During and after Pregnancy (http://www.4woman.gov/faq/postpartum.htm)

Postpartum Support International (http://www.postpartum.net/) website

Depression after Delivery (depressionafterdelivery.com) website

PPD Support (www.ppdsupportpage.com) website

Support for Dads (www.postpartumdads.org) website

Beyond the Blues (www.beyondtheblues.com) website


Prenatal Screening

article: Prenatal Screening (http://www.infertilitycentral.com/fertility/prenatal-screening.html)


Books

Pregnancy After a Loss : A Guide to Pregnancy After a
Miscarriage, Stillbirth or Infant Death
by Carol Cirulli Lanham c1999

Trying Again: A Guide to Pregnancy After Miscarriage,
Stillbirth, and Infant Loss
by Ann Douglas, and John R. Sussman MD c2000

The Long Awaited Stork: A Guide to Parenting after Infertility
by Ellen Sarasohn Glazer and Alan Rinzler c1998

[angelgirl8]

how can i resist joining your thread?!

me: angelgirl8, 28
dh: dave, 28
ttc since: 1/04
ttc issues: possible polycystic ovaries, possible poor egg quality
protocol conceived with: IVF #2
BFP: 6.2.05
due date: 2.8.06

[Scooter]

Hi, Angel! :D I didn't want to add my own stats until someone else put theirs, too, so I'll put them both up. I hope others find this place too!

Let me know if there's anything else I should add/change, and if there are any good websites or books for us out there.

I've looked at a bunch of pregnancy books and it seems like the 1st half is all about how you get pregnant (from sex, hahaha) & how there's this thing called ovulation and the first Dr appt is at 10-12 wks. :rolleyes:

[jrsygirl]

just joining in!
me: jrsygirl, 31
dh: 32
ttc since: 3/04
ttc issues: uterine didelphys
protocol conceived with: IUI #1
BFP: 8.18.05
due date: 4.28.06

[AusMarchBride]

Scooter Congrats again to you and thanks for starting this thread. I'd like to join if I may. A hi to angelgirl and jrsygirl

I think the pregnancy we go through is quite different from that of someone who has fallen pregnant naturally. I've joined the Feb 2006 mommies thread here, and they're a great bunch of ladies, but I think I feel different from them. I worried tremendously when I was spotting in the first trimester, and also after I had CVS I was frightened I would miscarry. I'm not saying that the other mum's wouldn't worry, I know they would, but for me it's taken 2.5 years to get here via IVF, and if something goes wrong, it's a long road to get back to this point. If something does go wrong, I can't go home and try again in a couple of months and fall pregnant again myself. I need IVF with all the drugs and drama and stress that involves.

I know even at 15+ weeks, I'm still feeling quite detached from my pregnancy. I know logically I'm pregnant, I know that I see my baby on the ultrasounds, hear it's heartbeat in the doc's office etc, but I still can't quite "get" that the person that's pregnant is ME. It's like I haven't made the emotional connection yet. I'm not worried that I won't make that connection, it's just that I expected it to happen as soon as I was pregnant as we tried for 2.5 yrs, and I'm surprised that it hasn't yet.

Scooter I've looked at a bunch of pregnancy books and it seems like the 1st half is all about how you get pregnant (from sex, hahaha) Ahh shoot, that's what we were doing wrong ;) Seriusly though, I haven't found any pregnancy books that really tell it from the ART side, and I think it is different from a normal pregnancy.

So now I've given you my innermost thoughts, let's hope I haven't frightened you all :D

My stats are:
AusMarchBride, just call me Ann
me 39
DH 43
ttc since 3/03
diagnosis: unexplained infertility
conceived with IVF cycle #2
BFP 14 June 2005
single baby due 17 Feb 2006

[amygrrl]

hi girls... cautiously raising my hand to join if it's okay with you guys. even though this pregnancy was all natural, it was a total fluke! avery was conceived via IVF after 2 yrs of trying and even the dr.'s can't figure out how i got preggers just 7 weeks after losing her.

Amy 35
DH 33
DD Avery Elizabeth ~ June 3, 2005 ~ born still at 27 weeks.
TTC since 2003
TTC issues: PCOS
Protocol you conceived with: MIRACLE!!!!!!
BFP date: August 5th
Due Date: April 18, 2006 (but will be induced early at 38 wks due to previous loss)

[Scooter]

Welcome, Jrsygirl! Do you know when your first u/s is? I feel like I can't really relax yet until I go to mine and see a heartbeat. Hopefully there will be one at 6w3d. ?? The nurse told me I'll be released to an ob after the u/s. I thought it would be longer so I'm pretty scared about that. I was hoping for a 7 or 8wk u/s too before being sent on my way! How about you, what have they told you?

Welcome, Ann! Your post didn't scare me at all, I feel a lot the same way. When I see what they're posting in the April thread I just can't imagine talking or even thinking about some of that stuff yet. I guess the odds have just been against us so much to this point that I can't take anything for granted, including that this will be a normal pregnancy or everything will turn out just fine. I'm trying not to stress, but I can't make those big leaps to be able to shop for maternity clothes & cribs & daycares & things quite yet! One thing at a time.

Amy, hey there, somehow I missed you! I have no problem adding you. Even though you magically got pregnant on a non-treatment cycle (without a Dr in the room?? :eek: ), because you've been through all this you are still in the same mindset about pregnancy as all of us. :)

[AusMarchBride]

amygrrl Hi there, and congrats to you. As scooter said, you magically got pregnant on a non-treatment cycle (without a Dr in the room??

Without a doctor??? With just you and DH? You mean that's possible ;)

dr.'s can't figure out how i got preggers just 7 weeks after losing her. You know, after having done IVF I really believe that doctors don't know as much as we think they do about this reproductive stuff, and sometimes things surprise them. However it happens, whatever method, even the old fashioned way ;), it's all good.

Scooter I'm trying not to stress, but I can't make those big leaps to be able to shop for maternity clothes & cribs & daycares & things quite yet! One thing at a time Even though as I said I don't believe it's actually ME who's pregnant (not sure who I think it is though :rolleyes: ) I have just started the last week or so wanting to go and buy the maternity clothes and the cribs etc. Part of it is necessity, my clothes at 15+ weeks are now just too tight in the waist, and let's just not even mention the ginormous B :eek: :eek: BS

I also think that for me, once I heard the heartbeat, saw that all was ok on the ultrasounds, got past the 12 week stage, and also had good results from my CVS, it got a little easier to believe that this would be ok.

You should be able to see a heartbeat on the U/S at 6w3d. I had my first u/s to check the ovaries had gone back to normal after the IVF drugs at 6w4d and we definitely saw the heart beating. But try not to stress if you can't, depending on the baby's position, it can be difficult sometimes at that early stage.

I didn't then get another U/s or even doctor's visit until I saw my OB for the first time at 12weeks. It was a loooong wait :D

Just a suggestion if everyone is ok with it. I'm not very smart and sometimes have a shocking memory. Would it be possible for everyone to put in the title line of their posts how far along they are? It helps to not have to go look up the first page when I want to answer or ask someone a question and I can't remember how far along they are.

[ART babies]

Ann, that's a good suggestion, it makes a lot of sense. I just added it into the first post. :)


I also have been doing some online research and have started to make a list of resources and things for us. I've found a bunch of articles already, if you want to read any of them. Some of them are repetitive, but they are mostly from various infertility sites so they had some decent info.

I included some of the miscarriage/loss info as well, because I know that some of us have been through that as well and it only adds on to what we're going through.

Please let me know if you find any more resources, and since I didn't read every article I posted, let me know if any of them suck! :p

[AusMarchBride]

Wow, you have been a busy Scooter :D

I'll go and read those links right now. It's only 2.30pm here and I've some time to kill.

[Scooter]

Ann, I'm having trouble believing it's me who's pregnant, too. (Even just typing that sentence I had a "whoa, I'm pregnant??" moment!) It just doesn't seem real, but then it's only been a week and half we've known. I think you're right, once we get past all those milestones I have a feeling I'll kind of settle into the idea more. I keep feeling like I'm lying when I tell people the news, like I completely imagined the betas and the 11 HPTs. Thanks for the heartbeat reassurances, I need to remember if that if they have trouble finding it.

ETA: we keep cross-posting! :D Yeah, I was busy! Then again, I slept 11 hours last night and just took a 4 hour nap, so I had a little more energy than normal. ;) I really want to go back & read the Bitter Girl's Guide blog, that looked entertaining. Never thought I'd be pg and still bitter about infertility!

Amy, talking to you two all day yesterday totally WORE ME OUT!! :D

[AusMarchBride]

article from WedMD Emotional Roulette: Pregnancy After InfertilityI thought this article was very very accurate.

And this, a quote from the InfertilityCentral.com article "Pregnant after Infertility"

You're in your first trimester, and you're nauseous 24/7. You dare not complain to a soul, however, for fear that you'll hear:

I told you so!
And you wanted to be pregnant sooo badly...
Can you believe you went through all of that to feel like this?
Or perhaps you're in your last trimester, and the only shoes that will go on your swollen feet are shower sandals, while your sciatica gives you such pain that the slightest movement brings tears to your eyes. After seven or more months, you've probably learned by now that not only do folks tire of hearing pregnant women complain, any kvetching on your part will probably be heard with even less understanding. After all, didn't you say that you'd never complain if you could only conceive?

I am still having terrible morning sickness at 15+ weeks. My OB has prescribed an anti nausea drug which is doing absolutely nothing. My nausea is there from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to sleep, and gets steadily worse during the day. It's horrible and draining and just awful. I was in tears the other night saying to my DH, "I know I wanted this but I hate feeling so sick ALL the time". And at the same time, I feel terribly guilty that I am not enjoying this pregnancy. I know there are women who would give their right arms to have this morning sickness. I remember reading last year some posts on WC by a woman who had been through IF and was pregnant and complaining about her morning sickness, and I remember thinking I wanted to slap her. And now I feel guilty because I AM now that woman and I hate feeling sick all the time and I DO feel guilty that I feel this way.

Good grief, can I bare my soul any more in the space of 3 posts in this thread!!

[amygrrl]

thanks for the warm welcome!

[AusMarchBride]

dh is VERY full of himself knowing that he knocked me up with out the help of the entire stanford medical staff like last time

amygrrl That completely cracked me up :D

What a rollercoaster it has been for you, I admire your strength.

And your suggestion about sympathy points from my DH, I'm way ahead of you. Actually though, he's been fantastically supportive so I've been very lucky.

And please, call me Ann, it's much quicker to type ;)

[jrsygirl]

scooter I had posted about this in the still at it thread..I'm actually going in for an US tomorrow. The dr office freaked out after I told them that we were going to Italy for two weeks saying they wouldn't want me to travel at all. So they are doing a scan tomorrow to make sure the pregnancy isn't ectopic which of course has left me extremely freaked out for the last week.

My betas were extremely high on the second round, they went from 895 on day 16 to 2503 on day 18.
So of course after talking to the dr office I had to do some research and a possible cause of elevated #'s is an ectopic pregannacy. So of course every twinge has me freaking out. :(

[angelgirl8]

hi to jrsygirl, amy, ann and scooter!!

i share the same feelings that most of you guys have.

like ann, i'm in the february moms thread (mostly because i've dreamed of being in one of those for about 2 years now) but i find it difficult to relate to some of the moms who haven't gone through what we've all gone through.

scooter...great articles. headed to read them! my first u/s was at 5w4d and we saw the fetal poles and sacs. the second was at 6w4d and we saw the heartbeats. i hope it's not too early for you!

____

i'm also the same as ann in that i'm still sick here at 16 weeks. kind of feels like it should be easier, huh?

[Astro]

Hi Everyone. Glad to see this thread. :) I'd like to join too please. I don't post too much, but I'm usually lurking during the day.

Astro 38
DH 36
TTC since 9/03
TTC issues: mild endo, polyp, fibroids
IVF
BFP: 6/12/05
Twins due 2/18/06


I'm over on the February 2006 thread with Angel and Ann (AusMarchBride - I can't stop thinking of you as that). I've actually been jealous of Angel and Ann because they have morning sickness. I know it sounds odd, but we've struggled to get pregnant and I'd just like to have a symptom... other than the frickin huge b :eek: :eek: bs. We had quite a scare early in the pregnancy when I had major bleeding. I was positive I'd lost the babies, but came to find out they were fine. I bled and spotted for most of the first trimester, so it was hard to feel confident in the pregnancy. Now, at 15 weeks 1 day, everything seems to be going ok. I wouldn't know I was pregnant except my belly keeps growing and I crave chocolate milk.

I finally caved this past weekend and bought maternity clothes, after I found myself eyeing my husbands shirts. He's 6'3", 250 lbs. I'm 5'5", so his shirts look like dresses on me. kind of silly. We bough a few things for the kids, just the necessity type stuff of carseats, stroller, and crib. We bought those because there was a good sale, and the cribs take about 12 weeks to arrive.

Enough of the novel. I hope we all eventually "feel pregnant" and start to enjoy it more than we are nervous about it. :)

[Scooter]

Ann, I did read that part you posted from that article! So true. I have said that to friends before, that I'd happily have morning sickness for 9 months if it meant I could have a baby. Of course, I've had light m/s on and off for 13 months, ever since I started the fertility drugs. :rolleyes: Sorry you've had so much m/s, it's got to be hard to get on with everyday life feeling so sick.

Amy, who knew that sitting on a couch talking and eating would be so exhausting? It was like I'd been swimming all day, I was so tired! Sorry about the pukeyness, although you did good on Saturday. I hope you continue to have some good days like that. Oh yeah, while I was looking stuff up, I came across the book Empty Cradle--I don't know if you've heard of it, or if it's mroe aimed towards SIDS, but it had some great reviews so I thought I'd mention it to you.

Jrsy, sorry! I have no memory right now, and I forgot you'd posted there! Anyway, I did read what you said about the high betas meaning ectopic. I really doubt you have to worry about that. It seems more likely that it points toward multiples, but betas alone don't mean much! As long as they're doubling well, that's all they'll tell you. Did you go to the betabase (www.betabase.com) site that LABride posted for you? That is the best betas site! It has a chart for singles & multiples, and your numbers are within the normal singleton rates. You can also enter your own numbers in and it tells you your doubling rates, very cool.

Angel, thanks for the u/s info! Is it weird that I only get 1 u/s from my RE, at 6w, and then I'm released to an ob? Maybe I've been reading too many IVFers stories, because it seems like you guys get more u/s appts. I'm just paranoid and need lots of u/s reassurance!!

Astro, Welcome! I understand where you're coming from--I don't want to have to deal with m/s but I kind of want it just as a reassurance things are ok. I've been feeling pretty good overall (just moments of quesiness now & then) and it freaks me out!! Although at least your growing belly is a good visual reminder for you.

In your stats you said that polyps was an issue--have you had them more than once, and do you have any while pg? I ask because I had a polypectomy last summer, and one had come back this summer. If this cycle didn't work I was suppoed to go in for a saline sonogram & a hysteroscopy--so now I'm paranoid that the polyp is going to cause a miscarriage.

[Astro]

Scooter My OB thought I had a poly last year, but when she went in, she didn't find it (June 2004). Then she sent me to the RE. He went in in October 2004 and found it. It was a tricky unusual polyp in that it grew from the bottom of the uterous up (if that makes sense). He said it was completely understandable why the OB didn't find it because when she went in from the cervix, the polyp would have been plastered against the wall. He did a saline hystowhatever and had it completely mapped out. He knew where it originated, where it went, how big it was, etc. prior to going in. That was the only "reason" he could see why we weren't pregnant. 6 months later (after still not getting pregnant), he moved us on to IVF.

I don't know if a polyp will come back. I do know the fibroids (all growing on the exterior of the uterous) are continuing to grow and my ovaries are still not back to "normal" size after the ivf, but no one seems too concerned about that. I hope the fibroids stop growing, the polyp doesn't come back, the endo doesn't get worse, and the kids come out fine. I hope your polyp behaves. :)

[Scooter]

Astro, that makes a lot of sense. They thought I had one after the HSG, but the saline sono showed it was really two. They told me that polyps really don't cause IF. When they removed them, they were shocked that one was large and one was medium, and said maybe it really did cause my IF. (I was starting to get that even REs don't really know what's going on.) They told me that polyps usually grow back, but it could be months or years before that happens. I hope your fibroids stop growing, too! Doesn't being pg help keep the endo under control?

[AusMarchBride]

Astro other than the frickin huge b :eek: :eek: bs

Oh, I'm feeling your pain. Mine are on a mission, which apparently involves world domination :rolleyes: I think after I have (assuming I'm able to) breastfed this child, I'll have to tie my boobs in a knot around the back of my neck. Now that's a look you won't see on the cover of Vogue anytime soon.

Scooter Is it weird that I only get 1 u/s from my RE, at 6w, and then I'm released to an ob? Maybe I've been reading too many IVFers stories, because it seems like you guys get more u/s appts

Even though mine is an IVF pregnancy, I only had one ultrasound at 6w4d (they always do this with IVF to make sure that your ovaries have gone back to normal after all the drugs) and then I was released to my OB who I didn't see until I was 12 weeks. She did my 2nd ultrasound that day, and apart from the U/S I had for CVS I don't get another one until around 18 weeks. I think the extra visits you (and I) have read about are because of twin/multiple pregnancies, or people that have had issues early in pregnancy and so the doctors feel they need extra monitoring. Or maybe they're just lucky ;)

jerseygirl I'll also add to the chorus of telling you not to worry too much about high betas and ectopic. I had very high betas in my 3 blood tests they did, and even though we only put back one egg, my doc was surprised to find out I was only having one baby. High numbers can just be a sign that you have a strong pregnancy early on and your body is producing good levels of the right hormones. The downside is that high levels of these hormones are more likely to give you greater morning sickness, so be prepared :D

Now, that's not to freak astro out, the stuff about high levels & strong pregnancy. Your twins have settled in there beautifully and they're not coming out for a looooong time.

Also, I haunted that beta board for a while when I was first pregnant, and spent way too much time analysing my own numbers, but in hindsight, it's probably better to stay away. I think the internet is a great resource, but it can also be a source of stress. 20 years ago most women would never have known to even ask what their betas were, and wouldn't have therefore been worried about ectopics etc. ALthough it's a good thing that we have more medical knowledge, sometimes it's bad to have "too much" knowledge. (Can everyone see the irony in me posting this in a support thread for pregnant women who are already going to worry :rolleyes: )

Scooter Sorry you've had so much m/s, it's got to be hard to get on with everyday life feeling so sick. Thanks for the sympathy. It has been hard, and then I feel guilty about it being hard. But my DH is a champion. He's doing very well on takeaway and prepackaged food bless him and doesn't complain. I'm very lucky.

[Christy5599]

OMG you guys! This thread is awesome! I'm so happy to see you all in here! I would join but I can't even keep track of the March momma's thread. Thinking sticky vibes for all of you and good thoughts all the way!

[jrsygirl]

OK- I just posted this in the "Still at It" thread but of course wanted you all to hear the news too...
Let me start this post by saying that my RE is amazing. He is literally at the top of his field, has a state of the art facility, and has people literally come from out of state to see him. So when he starts out my US bu saying "in all my career I have never seen anything like this" it scares the crap out of me. Are you ready for this?


WE HAVE FOUR BABIES.

and the amazing part is I am pregnant on BOTH SIDES. If you remember I was briefly worried about that but he assured me it wasn't possible. BUT Remember after the IUI he told Brian and I to go home and cover our bases? well he got me pregnant on the other side!! ( for those that are lost I have a dydelpic uterus which basically means I have two uterus).
anyway. there are no heartbeats yet. I'm just 5w2d. so we're going back on the 12th for a super ultrasound and then we'll see what to do about reducing. remember I'm only going to be allowed to carry 2.
can you believe this? I swear stuff like this only happens to me!

[angelgirl8]

lost a big post!!

to recap quickly b/c i MUST eat.

scooter...can't wait for your u/s! i had 4 before i left my RE but probably because they needed to check for multiples and monitor progesterone since i was on the PIO. and i think my RE loves the dildocam.

ann...we deserve to complain. we're not immune to the pains of pregnancy because of the infertility, so why should we be stopped from complaining?! trying to think that way.

jrsygirl...wow! pregnant on both sides...i can't believe it. your doctor must be floored! how are you feeling?!

[Klo.]

Hey ladies -
I recognize most of you from the IVF/SAI threads. I just wanted to pop in and say that I am so happy someone started a thread like this. I really wanted to when I was pg but knew I wouldn't be able to do the upkeep. I can totally relate. I had a really hard time connecting with the girls in the July mommies thread and I totally agree that pg (and motherhood for that mtter) after ART is a completely different experience for those that can just jump in bed and "fall pregnant" like Ann says.
I won't join because I'm no longer pg. I'm a very happy mamma to a beautiful little boy, Matthew - who is the absolute light of my life and a true miracle. Motherhood is one of the most awesome experiences ever and I can't wait for the rest of you to find out why.
We hope to TTC #2 in the near future and maybe I'll join up then. In the meantime I hope you don't mind me hanging out and lurking now and then. :)

Good luck to all of you, may you have easy and healthy pg'ys.

PS - if anyone has any questions I'd be happy to answer.

[AusMarchBride]

WE HAVE FOUR BABIES.

Holy crap!! That's amazing. You must be gobsmacked :) Your DH should be pretty proud of himself too ;)

This is probably a stupid question (and when I hear the answer I'll probably have one of those D'oh moments!), but when they say you can only carry 2 babies and you have 2 uteruses (uteri?), do they mean you have to carry both bubs on the one side? Cause I would think that labour contractions from bother uterus wouldn't be very pleasant (although I guess you'd be more likely to have a c-section?)

And that's my intrusive questions done for today. Feel free not to answer if you don't want to.

Klo Hi there, nice to see you and great to hear motherhood is going beautifully for you. I hope number two happens as easily as possible for you. I don't want to speak for Scooter, but I'm sure none of us would mind you joining and posting from "the other side" ;) if you want.

And I do have a question for you, seeing as you offered :D You mentioned that motherhood was different after ART. In what way? Is it because it was a harder journey that you maybe appreciate it more?

angelgirl Ahhh, the memories of the dildocam ;) , haven't had one for nearly 4 weeks now.

I'll tell you a story. At my CVS ultrasound, at the start of the appt, I told the doc it was an IVF pregnancy. No probs, he then proceeded to do the detailed external ultrasound to check for abnormalities. Then he mentioned he wanted to do an internal ultrasound, and started explaining what that entailed and was going to show me the ultrasound probe. I said not to worry, remember IVF baby, had many many internal ultrasounds before. He said no problems and started getting organised to do it. BTW, DH was in the room with me the whole time. Then (no idea why, maybe just to lighten things up because it was a little stressful in there with all the checking going on) I said to the doctor as a joke "Are you going to buy me dinner first?" The doc just stared at me and I thought to myself oh heck, I've gone way too far and started to apologise. Then the doc burst out laughing and asked if I minded if he told his colleagues, he thought it was hysterical.

So there's a nice depiction of the strange girl I am :D

[jrsygirl]

ann~ I don't mind the questions. its a pretty unique situation I think. My RE isn't committing to any action yets he wants to see heart beats and see how they grow over the next two weeks. but of course he did speculate and say his ideal preference would be to have me carry one baby on each side. since I have 3 Sacs on one side an one on the other who knows what will happen.
regardles of multiples and other complications I knew I was having a csection going into it.

I'm heading out to Italy for the next 12 days so I will definitely update you all when I get back. The next big us will be the day after I get back so pray for heart beats. Since we never saw one last time my husband is really nervous.

[amygrrl]

hey mommies!


jrsygirl - wow! that's about all i can say about that!

AusMarchBride - when do you get your cvs results back?

Scooter - maybe next time we hang out together we can just nap? i think our next u/s's are around the same time. mine is next wed. can't wait!

k... i'll give more s/o's in a bit. i totally need to go to bed!

[Klo.]

I'm back again already.

First, I wanted to clear up something I wrote yesterday. I wrote "pg after ART" and what I really meant was "pg after IF." I really, really hope I didn't come across the wrong way or offend anyone. If I did I am truely sorry. ack. I just don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. As all of us know all to well IF is just dreadful no matter what means you end up eventually getting pg.

Ann -
Hey there. I guess I don't really know exactly how different it is. But yeah, I really do feel like you appreciate it a little more. I'm not saying I'm a better mother than XYZ because she got pg on her first try but I really cherish every day. I keep thinking about and going back to my pictures of him when he was only 8 cells and the miracle he truely it just baffles my mind. I do think, perhaps, that it has made ME a better mother than if I had gotten pg easily. When times get a little frustrating (and trust me they will) I try to keep perspective of those months and months of waiting and crying and praying - it kind of helps keep me in check. Thats not to say that us fertility challenged don't have every right to complain and such, cause if anyone does - its US!! ;)

Funny story about your doc. That is hilarious!!!

Amygrrl -
I am still just over the moon happy for you. Imagine getting pg without a room full of Drs. Craziness. I love the "magic juice" explanation.
Wishing a very healthy pg'y for you.

jrsygirl -
WOW!!! 4 babies. I hope everything turns out ok and you don't have to make any difficult decisions. I've never heard of 2 uteruses either.
Enjoy your trip to Italy!!

Scooter -
I've never gotten to know you too well because I wasn't around on the SAI board that much but I've always kept an eye out for you and was so so happy to hear that you are pg. Wishing you all the best!

[amygrrl]

the other thing i like about this thread is i can actually keep up with it!

new symptom has emerged... the sudden onset of raging hunger that means i must eat immediately or someone will die.

[amychris03]

Me: Amy (29)
DH: Chris (35)
TTC since 9/03
TTC Issues: PCOS, Tubal issues
EDD: 3/26/06

I've been lurking along, Im just too darned exhausted to type since going
back to work. Plus DH has been working late so I get to spend every waking
minute cleaning for the IL invasion this weekend. Things are going pretty
good currently. I'm still feeling icky on and off, still getting headaches on
and off, but for the most part ok. I think if I could just sleep more I'd be
perfectly content ;) .

[Kimmiebride]

A little birdie told me about this thread!! So wonderful to find you guys!
can I join ya?

Me: Kimmie, DH: Wubs
TTC 8/2002
DX unexplained infertility, tried Clomid x3, Letryzole/IUI x2, Injectibles/IUI x2
Protocol for conception: Miracle on a break from meds due to timing/travel
BFP: 8/12/2005, Betas: 178, 756, 2185, 7236, 17,431
EDD: 4/23/2006
first U/S: 9/2/2005


It's so good to be somewhere where I can relate a little better, even though I am enjoying my pals in the April thread. At the ripe old age of 40, sometimes this is really scary, and I am glad to find people I can really relate to - it took us all so much to get here. It's also great to see so many familiar names from WC, and the other threads! All the best to each of you!

Tired... yup.. time for my nap, then must go to the post office to ship some lingering packages. Wouldn't it be nice if we could just nap and someone else would do the work???
Kimmie

[bottleored]

Popping my head in ..... will join officially later ..... got to get out of work now!

[angelgirl8]

welcome amy, kimmie and bottleored!!


___

i've been here feeling sorry for myself for the last couple of days. people keep asking how i'm feeling and i say "crappy" because i feel crappy. and everyone is so surprised since i shouldn't still be sick and shouldn't still be on zofran. but i am.

i just feel like it's ridiculous that i'm still ill, but not unheard of. i think i might be one of those lucky people that are sick throughout pregnancy. which is fine, but i thought i'd get a bit of a break! oh well, maybe this means i'll have really well-behaved babies!

[bottleored]

I'm back! I got my second set of beta results today. I went from 23 on Monday to 63 on Wednesday. Not high, but doubling. Part of me suspects I had implantation on Sunday (12DPO) and maybe that's why it's not high. I'll continue to go to my RE until 12 weeks because of my antibody issues. I have an appointment next week for more bloodwork and hopefully an u/s the week after.

Anyway, here are my stats
bottleored
Me: Caroline (39)
DH: Paul (43)
Married: 10.03
TTC: 1.04
Issues: Uterine Polyp: 5.04, Clomid (6x), Blocked tube (unblocked 1.05), 2 cycles of 'borderline pgcy', antibody issues hopefully taken care of by blood thinners
Successful Protocol: second cycle of injectibles + low dose HCG, blood thinner, progesterone
PREGNANT! 8.29.05
Due Date 5.9.06

I am honored to be in such great company! Some 'faces' I'm familiar with, some not so much.

angelgirl sorry you're feeling so sick! Hopefully what you say about behavior is true!

Off to join the May Mommies thread!

[Astro]

Welcome Amy, Kimmie, and Bottleored (still think bottle o fred when I see you're name... from eons ago) ;)

angelgirl8 Sorry to hear you're still feeling ill. Don't worry about saying you feel crappy. It's the truth. I've realized there is no such thing as a "normal" pregnancy. Hopefully your crappy feeling goes away soon.

As for me, I'm back on feet-up, don't do a thing restrictions this weekend. I've had a lot of cramps for the past 24 hours, so I called the Dr. I wasn't too concerned because there's no bleeding (it finally stopped 3 weeks ago), so I figured it's just growing pains from the kids. The Dr things that's probably correct, but to just take it easy again. I'm am so frickin tired of taking it easy and not feeling like I'm pregnant. I wish we all had easy pregnancies with little worries. Oh well. Hopefully the cramping stops soon and I can get back to doing things (like sitting in a normal chair, going for a short walk, etc.).

[amygrrl]

u/s showed roy is doing great. h/b looked good and he's measuring right on target. the 'pocket of fluid' in my uterus has resolved itself. so to celebrate, i came home and did the early gender testing kit and dropped it off at fedex. with the holiday, we'll probably get an answer on tuesday or wednesday. can't wait!
---------------
Astro - keep your feet up and TRY to enjoy the rest (though i know it's hard and boring)!

bottleored - welcome!

angelgirl8 - i was sick my entire pregnancy with avery. by about 20 weeks it just became a fact of life and it wasn't bugging me as much. i hope that happens for you too.

Kimmiebride - welcome to you too!

amychris03 - welcome to you three!

a side note about the 'magic juice'... i think my dh thinks that's a reference to his 'stuff'... man, who knew knocking a girl up could bring out the caveman?

[HthrStarr]

I am so glad to see this thread!!! I wish it was around when I was pregnant!!! Matthew was an ART baby also. I conceived after an injectable/IUI cycle. It was our fifth IUI cycle with injectables, and we had done three clomid cycles before that. I have blocked tubes, low hormone levels and low sperm counts (well, DH has the low sperm counts, not me) :)

I have to agree that pregnancy and new momhood is different when you've tired SO HARD for it. I have to say, however, that I was shocked to find I had some Post Partum Depression. It was just for a couple of weeks and was rather mild (I didn't want to hurt anyone I was just sad all the time). I never thougth I could feed sad after my miracle baby was born, but there I was, feeling sad. It's amazing how much hormones can throw you for a loop.

I just wanted to metion that as something to think about and possibly watch for. Going through IF didn't automatically exempt me from raging post-delivery hormones like I thought it would.

The good news is that it only lasted a couple of weeks and now I'm just loving my little guy :)

It's sooo good to see you ladies all here. I recognize most of you from the old SAI thread and I'm thrilled that you're finally getting your chance. :D

[angelgirl8]

bottleored...numbers look great! congrats again!

amygrrl...glad you get to get away. avery's due date approaching must be unbelievably hard for you. sending you and dan and roy good thoughts...so glad you got to have an u/s before you left!

astro...how far along are you now? my cramps came back full force at some point (wow, i'll have to look it up) and that completely panicked me. rest rest rest!

heather...hi! i was seeing a therapist for awhile for emotions related to infertility and once i was pregnant we discussed how infertility doesn't exempt me from having a hard time during pregnancy and after. thanks for coming in and saying it!

[Kimmiebride]

http://www.millcottagebridal.com/wubletweb.jpg
We saw the little heartbeat today!!!!! OMG... no one can prepare you for what that feels like for the first time! I am measuring right on target - 6w4d, and the tech said it all looks good so far. One milestone passed... so many more to go! I get to be "graduated" from the RE now, and have to go find a doctor in SF. It's bittersweet, as I love my "team" in Oakland. I didn't even get to see my doctor to give her a big hug goodbye. I'll have to stop by sometime when I know she's there...
have a good safe weekend everybody!
Kimmie

[Astro]

angelgirl8 I'm 15 weeks 6 days today. bad cramping and bleeding returned yesterday. Everything checks out fine. :)

Sorry I don't have time for individual shoutouts. Just a quick post.

If you have nationalgeorgraphic channel on your tv (cable, us), you might want to watch a great show tonight. In The Womb is on, and it is fantastic! it's 2 hours about the development of the baby in the womb. It's only about the baby, has amazing 3d and 4d pictures (4d is 3d with time added). I highly recommend it and am watching it again tonight.

[Bernie]

Hi ladies-

Please add me to the roster:

Bernie
Stacey, 30
DH, 34
ttc since: 1/04
ttc issues: unexplained
conceived with IVF #1
BFP: 6.29.05
Twins due 3.8.06

I just got back from vacation, and was so happy to see that someone had started this thread! I think I've been feeling the entire range of emotions that other people have been describing - it is so comforting to know that I'm not the only one feeling that way.

[Astro]

16 weeks on Sunday

Cross-posted to IVF Anyone, Feb2006 Mommas, Mothers of Multiples, and Pregnancy after Infertility.

Hi all. I do not want to retype this as we've just been through the worst 12 hours in our lives. Here's the short story.

I started cramping Thursday evening. Bled a little (not much, but red blood) on Friday morning, went to the MAternal Fetal Specialist and they could find nothing wrong. The kids were moving around, their hearts were going strong, they measured on track. The specialist checked the placentas (all good) and my cervic (long, tight, closed). The cramping died down a bit as did the bleeding (old blood spots, not new blood). Saturday and Sunday I felt better.

Now's the bad part. About 10:30pm on Sunday, I strated getting very sharp difficult pains for 1-2 minutes every 3-10 minutes. We called the OB on call that night. He was to return our call in 20 minutes. Within that time, I went to the bathroom (felt a gush), and delivered the first baby in the toilet. The Dr called, we said we were on our way to emergency. He said he'd meet us there and we'd go directly to labor and delivery. The 2nd baby was born about 30 minutes later. We waited 3 hours for the placentas, but they never appeared. At about 4am, I was taken to surgery for a D&C.

The kids (two boys) were absolutely perfect (but stillborn). They measured correct and looked so good. We named them Steven Alexander and Ryan Philip. We're currently trying to work out the details for their cremation.

Please remove me from all lists EXCEPT the IVF Anyone board. I plan to return there eventually to try again. For now, my DH (that doesn't even come close to my feelings for him at this time) and I are going to concentrate on healing ourselves. I will probably be reading/lurking, and I wish you all the best.

thanks.

[bottleored]

Oh Astro. My heart is breaking for you. What a terrible experience to have been through. Please know there are lots of prayers headed your way for you and your family. {{{HUGS}}}

[Bernie]

Astro - I am so very sorry. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your DH.

[Kimmiebride]

Oh, Astro... words must not mean anything at a time like this, but I am so very sorry. I pray that healing comes to you and your DH after your mourn the heartbreaking loss of your sons.
Kimmie

[Scooter]

Astro, my god, I'm so sorry. What a horrible, devastating experience. Thank you for taking the time to let us know, I can't even imagine what you must be going through! We'll be thinking of you.



Welcome to all the new members!

I haven't been around much, I've either been sleeping lately or lying down feeling like I'm about to be sick. But not actually being sick. I kinda feel hungover--bad headache and queasy stomach that wants some food but NOT other kinds of food.

[ART babies]

updated to here.


Astro, I took you off the roster like you requested, but I left your name on the first post. I'd really like to add your babies' names by yours, as a tiny tribute to their memory. When you can, let me know if those things are ok or you want to be completely removed.


------------------------------------------------------
For all members: I'm obviously not feeling up to being totally on top of things here (although hopefully when someone else takes over SAI I'll do better). I created a 2nd username so that other people can be coThreadmistresses if they want to, and so the thread can be passed down.

So...if anyone would like to join me as the thread updater, just go ahead and send me a PM. Either to this name or to Scooter, which I'll get faster.

[Christy5599]

I'm so sorry to hear your news Astro, you are in my prayers.

[Astro]

updated to here.


Astro, I took you off the roster like you requested, but I left your name on the first post. I'd really like to add your babies' names by yours, as a tiny tribute to their memory. When you can, let me know if those things are ok or you want to be completely removed.


This is a very beautiful idea. My DH and I talked about it and would appreciate it if you added their names by mine. We named them Steven Alexander (Alex for short) and Ryan Philip.

thanks

[Scooter]

Astro, I added them in. I don't know if you're still lurking, but I want you to know I just keep thinking about you & what you must be going through. I even dreamed about you & your boys last night. I hope you & your husband can find some comfort in each other right now.

[Scooter]

I've got my 1st u/s in a few hours. Please everyone keep us in your thoughts, I'm so terrified we'll get bad news. I'm trying to stay calm but it just doesn't seem like it could really be that easy to suddenly now be pg and have a good u/s. Am I being too negative? I have no perspective, I think.

[Kimmiebride]

Scooter,
Thinking of you for your first u/s! I think I know just how you are feeling - it was probably pretty close to what I was feeling last week when I went in... it's nerve-wracking to say the least to have finally gotten pregnant after all these years, and I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop in between bouts of complete positivity and joy, there are those icky moments of doubt. Hopefully a look at the little bean will calm your nerves, and maybe even a heartbeat... Thinking of you! Keep us posted!
Kimmie

[angelgirl8]

scooter...i felt the exact same way. thinking of you...come in and post after your u/s!!

[bottleored]

astro continuing to pray for you and your family. What beautiful names for your sons.

scooter I know so well what you're going through. I wouldn't exactly say that it was 'really that easy to suddenly now be pg' - you've been through a lot, no matter how you ultimately achieved your goal! Keep us posted! How many weeks are you?

Welcome Bernie!

Kimmie I'm so excited for you about the heartbeat! Another milestone to actually be believing all the news!

HthrStarr thanks for stopping by! I am worried about PPD because there's a little history in my family and when you add IF to that, I'm sure the guilt over not feeling pure joy could really get to me.

amygrrl how was your vacation? Thinking of Avery today. Did you get your gender results back? If I can ask, why wouldn't you just wait for a later u/s to find out? I didn't even realize you could find out this early!

~~~~~~~~~~~~
I had a mixed weekend. Sunday, we had s-e-x for the first time since my BFP. It was great and all, but I just broke down in a flood of tears, filled with fear about all the things that could possibly go wrong. DH tried to talk me down, but he just doesn't have all the 'info' I have from all the research. I did a search and found a bunch of articles (along with the ones scooter posted - thanks!) that helped me through and made me realize my fears are not uncommon. Monday was better. Friends came over, one of whom has a 6 week old. For the first time, I started thinking (to myself of course) - 'I'm going to have one of those soon and my friends are going to be so thrilled, I can't wait to tell everyone'.

QOTD when did you start to feel comfortable with your pregnancy? Was it the heartbeat? 24 weeks? After birth? I think it will be a day-to-day thing, with each milestone cementing my confidence. For many I suppose it is passing a milestone of a loss. I don't have a milestone for that, I am just concerned that I'm having to be proactive in keeping this baby alive by giving myself a shot every night and hoping it does it's magic.

[angelgirl8]

qotd...i think i felt more comfortable with each passing u/s, but i haven't gotten completely comfortable yet. i can't imagine i will...i worry about the babies every second of every day!

[amygrrl]

astro - i've been where you are and i want you to know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.

scooter - d and i are totally rooting for you today!

bottleored - the early gender test is brand new and is run by an independent company, not through the dr's office.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[amygrrl]

Congratulations! You will be expecting a baby girl and girl(s) only based on the information obtained from the fetal genetic materials found in your blood specimen. Our assay has concluded that at this moment there is no fetus-originated Y-specific chromosome sequence detectable in your sample. In addition, there is a substantial amount of fetus-originated X-specific chromosome sequence detected in your blood, indicating that you are currently carrying at least one baby girl! Thank you for choosing BabyGenderMentor Home DNA Gender Test.

[Suzlywoozly]

Barging in to say CONGRATULATIONS Amy!!! I told you it was a girl!!!! Now Scooter has to have a boy and then I will know I am psychic for sure :D

[Bernie]

QOTD - Still not feeling comfortable with this pregnancy - and realizing that I'm not sure I ever will! I think part of the problem is that mentally, I cannot accept that my body is working and doing what it is supposed to - because for the longest time, my body just wasn't working the way it should. And I think part of it is having access to too much information - I don't think I will feel safe until I am holding my babies.

I thought that I would feel "safe" once I started the 2nd trimester, but mentally, I don't think anything has changed. I still haven't worked up nerve to publically announce at work (although anybody who bothers to glance at my midsection can probably figure it out). I was planning on doing it today, but then decided that I should just wait for my next u/s (which is Thursday) - just to make sure everything is okay.

Scooter - hope everything went okay!

[Kimmiebride]

I cannot accept that my body is working and doing what it is supposed to - because for the longest time, my body just wasn't working the way it should.

Bernie, I hear ya... that is definitely what I am feeling... I keep meditating on trust and hope, and sometimes it helps and sometimes it's hard. Sometimes it becomes possible to go with the flow, and realize I am pregnant and that the little wublet is growing just fine in there, and sometimes I am panicked - my first appointment is 9/23, and they will do another u/s, so hopefully that will be good news too. Seeing the heartbeat was really cool, but I have read too much to know that some of my dear ladies on these boards have seen a h/b and still experienced a devastating loss. I don't know what milestone will make it more real for me... trying to take it one day at a time, and praying for the best (for all of us!)

ETA: Amy, congrats on a girl! It must be surreal, the whole experience being pregnant so soon after Avery. Thinking of you and sending my best!
Kimmie

[Astro]

Scooter Good luck on your u/s. Don't worry about trying to stay calm. I don't think you'll ever be completely calm. We've all been through so much, we've all heard the stories, it makes it difficult to adopt the relaxed happy-go-lucky attitude felt by many women who "happen to fall pregnant" at the drop of the hat. Just keep doing the best you can. I think the most helpful advice we ever got from the Dr's (in the early stages) was to not take up anything new. He actually said, "don't do anything you normally don't do. That way IF anything were to happen, you won't look back and say why did I start running marathons" It was comical when he said it, but from where we are now, it was exactly right.
bottleored I've heard it's normal to get nervous about having s-e-x after all it's taken to get pregnant. Supposedly it's fine. :) Glad to hear you had a little fun, but sorry to hear you broke down in tears.
amygrrl glad you had a good time on vacation. I think we might have had the same people next to us on our honeymoon as you guys had on vacation. Did it remind you from the scene in Secret of My Success where Michael J. Fox is laying in bed "conducting" the people next door? When then end he opens the cans of beer. :D Congratulations on your baby girl.
Bernie I don't think any of us really ever feel "safe" with the pregnancy until we have our live babies in our arms.
Everyone Hi everyone. Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers. They mean a lot to my DH and I.

We're doing better now... slowly, but better. The priest who married us is going to perform the boys ceremony next week, and we're incredibly thankful. He's very good, funny, sarcastic, and suprisingly comes from my DH's hometown. :) It was a strange connection we found when he married us. The ceremony will be at the church where we were married, and they have a place to bury the boys that's near a kids garden. All in all, it's brought us a lot of comfort to know the kids will be in our family church surrounded by kids playing around in a garden. We're also starting to remind each other of all the good memories and the boys personalities. It sounds odd, but we knew they personalities in-utero. Alex (first-born) was more reserved (didn't let us know he was a boy until birth). He was kicking back in my pelvis (DH says he was laying back pretending to be in a recliner). ;) Ryan was the extrovert. He's the one who was so excited to show us his good last friday. They both liked to eat and drink, constantly increasing demands for chocolate milk. So that's how we're going to try to remember them. Our two little rascles. :) :)

The hospital and staff was amazing. Since the boys were born at 16 weeks, they don't "qualify" by state law to have death certificates and are borderline for miscarriage/still birth (still birth is considered 20 weeks). The staff referred to the boys as our kids and consider them to be still born babies. It's a "little difference" that is actually quite huge. The staff treated our boys as regular kids and helped us through the grieving. We have memory boxes of both boys that include foot prints and measuring tapes. They were each 8 inches long. The boxes include their little hats, ID bracelets, and photos.


I'll continue to lurk, but won't be posting much.

Thanks

Astro

[amygrrl]

on the viagra people next door - honestly, i can't remember the last time d and i laughted that hard. the women sounds like either a cocker spaniel being kicked or a baby seal being clubbed. and this literally went on ALL night. in a span of roughly 60 hours they had sex 10 times that we could count. of course, during the day we were gone, so it may have been more. so it was more like every 2 1/2 hours from about 9 pm to 5 am. good times. for my revenge, i changed their door hanging early in the morning from 'do not disturb' to 'clean room now'... the poor maid probably walked in on all kinds of porn and nastiness.

Suzlywoozly - any word from scooter? i can't find what i did with either of your phone numbers.
~~~~~~~~~~~

[Scooter]

I'm back, I'm back! Thank you all for the positive thinking, it worked! Things went great, we have never been so relieved. Just one little sac, with a strong heartbeat (140) and measuring right on time. Typing that makes me want to cry, I'm just so thankful. We get 1 more u/s next week, with my RE, and then it's on to an OB. Today I met with the NP, and she is so CRAZY that DH & I were trying not to laugh and making faces behind her back. Seriously, I had to remind her to go back and measure the cysts on my ovaries, she was distracted by telling a story about herself.

Of course it's always something though, and now I've moved into the "Wait a second, this is real and we might have a baby?! I don't know what I'm doing, what if I'm not ready!" phase. :rolleyes: I've spent the last 2.5yrs trying to get pg, and the 2yrs before that aching to start trying, and by now, to be totally honest, I'm just sick of thinking about it. I think I got so burned out on ttc that I'm tired of talking about pregnancy with people. Strange, right?

a few quick replies:
Heather, I don't know if you'll read this, but thanks for stopping by! When I got pg just before IVF I thought of you! ;) Thanks for the PPD reminders. Women who've gone through IF have a much higher risk of it, so I had put some links in the 2nd post just for more info.

Sue, DH is sure it's a boy, too! Mainly 'cause he's so scared of having a girl. He says if it's a girl he's locking her up until she's 25. :rolleyes:

Amy, congrats on your little girl! :D :D Those viagra people scare me, every 2 1/2 hours? I think they were just showing off. :p

Astro, I loved reading about your boys, and their little personalities and chocolate milk cravings. They were such little people already, weren't they? It's a beautiful thought for them to be in a kids' garden. And thanks for the advice, I think you're right, I'll never be a happy-go-lucky pg woman (will any of us?) and I definitely won't start running marathons!

Bernie, I understand--if my body wasn't working right until now, who's to say that now it's going to do what it's supposed to??

QOTD: I'm with Kimmiebride, I'm taking it day by day and I'm sure I will for the whole pregnancy!

[AusMarchBride]

Gosh I haven't posted in here for ages because I wasn't getting update notifications. So now for some shoutouts:

Scooter Great news from your ultrasound. It's such a relief to have the reassurance, and then you can move on to worrying about the next thing :rolleyes: I've now had 3 u/s, a CVS, a visit to the docs office with doppler to hear the heartbeat. I've now moved into the worrying because I'm 16w5d and haven't felt the baby move yet. It should happen b/w 16 and 22wks for a 1st pregnancy, so that's my new worry.

Ahhh, does it ever end? My MIL said that you don't stop worrying about your kids until you close your eyes for the last time, and I'm sure she's right.

amygrrl the women sounds like either a cocker spaniel being kicked or a baby seal being clubbed Niiiice. And good grief, every 2.5 hrs, don't tell my DH, he'd be sooo jealous at the moment.

Congrats on your baby girl :D

Kimmiebride I think your feelings of sometimes being panicked and sometimes going with the flow are completely normal (well I have them so I hope they are ;) ).

Bernie I'm not sure if I've posted since you joined, so a big welcome to you. I thought that I would feel "safe" once I started the 2nd trimester, but mentally, I don't think anything has changed. Me too, I thought there would be this change in myself and I would suddenly be "okay" about the whole thing and no longer nervous and it definitely didn't happen. I still feel sort of distant from it all, as if it's happening to someone else. I think maybe when I start to feel the bub inside me, then I'll be better about it.

angelgirl How are you doing? I was thinking of you yesterday, I went to a luncheon that was put on by this Hotel group (Leading Hotels of The World). I was sitting next to a lady who was very senior at the Plaza Hotel in NY, she was an absolute riot. I was telling her when I come to NY to visit angelgirl and her twins I'd stay in her lovely hotel .

bottleored I had a mixed weekend. Sunday, we had s-e-x for the first time since my BFP. It was great and all, but I just broke down in a flood of tears, filled with fear about all the things that could possibly go wrong. Oh your poor thing. That's my fear also. And although I'm a lot of weeks ahead of you (I'm 16w5d), I have been so sick with M/S that DH hasn't really even thought about nookie and I think I'd have axe-murdered him if he'd tried it. I feel so guilty about not feeling like it, and then if I was up for it, I'd be worried sick like you afterwards. Oh well, I guess we have to cross that bridge when we get to it. I'm glad though that all your reading eased your fears.

Scooter I've just taken on threadmistress duties with the IVF thread. Can I see how that goes first (and how much updating there is) and then I'll see if I'm able to help you out with this thread too? I'll let you know. I've never been a threadmistress before so I've no idea how much is involved.

Heather Thanks for posting your story about IF and PPD. That thought had occurred to me, if I'm not able as yet to feel unrestrained joy about finally falling pregnant, then why would I be immune from PPD. But I'm glad you mentioned it, it's important to know that although pregnancy after IF can have different problems (emotional and mental) from a "normal" pregnancy, it can also have the same problems and difficulties.

I'm so glad you're enjoying life with Matthew :D

amygrrl a side note about the 'magic juice'... i think my dh thinks that's a reference to his 'stuff'... man, who knew knocking a girl up could bring out the caveman? Ahhh, I think they're all cavement about this sort of thing.

amychris I haven't posted since you joined either so welcome. But I have seen you many times in the IVF thread ;)

Hi to anyone I've missed, hope everyone is doing ok.

All well here although still sick with M/s (surely it's got to end soon, I'm 16w5d ) I have my next u/s on the 22nd Sep, so hopefully I'll see lots of good stuff and all will be well. And hopefully feel the bub move by then :rolleyes:

[angelgirl8]

ann...first things first, you are the queen of replies. i am humbled by you!

on movement: i keep hearing different things, but you still have a month to go before you have to start worrying! i've heard it depends on the placement of the placenta, as well.

on m/s: not to jinx myself or anything, but the last couple of days have finally been better for me. and you're a week behind me, so maybe this will be your magic time, too!

on nyc: the plaza is right by me! unfortunately, it's not a hotel right now...it's being turned into apartments, but they will still open some hotel rooms. it won't be for years. :( also, it's one of the most expensive hotels in the city! but maybe your friend can get you in! you'll have to come one day...i've never met an australian baby!

scooter...

I've spent the last 2.5yrs trying to get pg, and the 2yrs before that aching to start trying, and by now, to be totally honest, I'm just sick of thinking about it. I think I got so burned out on ttc that I'm tired of talking about pregnancy with people. Strange, right?

i feel the same way, but i was never able to quite put my finger on it. i'm really excited about the babies, but i was always jealous of people buying furniture and planning and naming and maternity clothes and now i just find myself in a weird position on those things. i'm not sure if i'm just not ready for those big steps or if it's just that i wanted them for so long that now i'm sick of thinking about them!

probably not having space for furniture helps quelch that craving, though!

i am so happy the u/s went well! that first hurdle really helped me start to feel a bit more comfortable.

amygrrl...congratulations on your girl! and i can't believe the people next door to you. nutty!

Astro...the ceremony for your boys sounds amazing. i'm glad you found a good priest and a good place to bury the boys. their little personalities sound amazing.

bottleored...i'm sorry that you broke down after sex. i think our emotions are running as high as humanely possible right now. that said, i can't say i've been where you are because i've just felt too damn sick to have sex since oh, since maybe april?? ACK!


____

nothing too new doing here. just hanging in...i do think the m/s has started to abate a tiny bit in the last couple of days.

started prenatal yoga yesterday, which was nice.

i have an appt with my obgyn today and then my big anatomy scan next week!

[bottleored]

Hi ladies. Looks like I'll have to wait a little longer to be a part of this thread :( My betas came back yesterday at 3 - yes, a negative pregnancy result. The nurse practitioner couldn't believe it was correct because I wasn't bleeding. Wouldn't you know the moment I got off the phone with her I started spotting. Full pre-AF bleeding last night. Needless to say we are crushed. I am more afraid than ever. I had a bunch of b/w done this morning, including more antibody stuff.

Thanks everyone for your reassurances and your humor. Amygrrl you had me laughing at the 'clean room' story!

Scooter Can you remove me from the roster? But I will be back!

[Kimmiebride]

Oh Caroline, I am so sorry!!!! I am hoping the testing will shed some light, and hoping like crazy that you'll be back here soon... big hugs to you and Paul!
Kimmie

[angelgirl8]

bottleored...i'm so sorry, sweetie. let us know how the testing goes.

[Kelly's Girl]

I am in the November mommies thread- a bit farther along, but an IUI success story nonetheless and wanted to join/congratulate everyone.

First, Bottleored I'm sure you'll be back very soon! Take care of yourself at this tough time. I m/c after my first round of injectibles and IUI and got pg the very next cycle.


Kelly's Girl-31
DH-31
TTC since August, 2003
TTC issues: anovulatory. 3 cycles of Clomid failed to stimulate O. M/C after 1st attempt at injectibles/IUI
Protocol you conceived with: Injectibles and IUI
BFP date and/or due date: BFP- 3/15/05, EDD- 11/22/05

[Scooter]

Caroline, oh no, I'm so sorry! And after you had such better results this time, I'm so sad for you. We'll be here waiting for you when you come back! In case you haven't seen them, I put some Reproductive Immunology links on the 1st page of SAI. There are also links to some other message boards about it that you may find helpful. Lots of luck!

Kelly'sGirl, welcome! I remember you getting your BFP over on the other boards. :)


I'll update the stats a little later, my head is spinning & I need to go lie down!

[Bernie]

bottleored - I am so sorry! Good luck - I hope to see you back here soon!

I just got back from my OB's appointment, and everything looked good - so I'm going to come clean at work today. Hopefully. If I can work up enough courage. Argh - I just wish I could do it in an email.

[Christy5599]

I'm sure you'll be back soon Bottleored, I'll be thinking good thoughts for you!

[amygrrl]

Caroline - well that just sucks. i'm sure you will be back here soon.

Bernie - i'm sure it will be ok to tell. you are bound to get a ton of great support and attention!

Kelly's Girl - welcome!

angelgirl8 - i am crossing my fingers for you with the m/s.

AusMarchBride - hoping the pukeyness ends for you too!

Scooter - yeah for a good h/b!!!! wasn't that the funnest thing ever.

update on me - had the appointment with the gestational diabetes specialist and dr. druzin's nurse today. my blood sugars look good, but they have set me up for 3 million additional tests... one of which includes collecting all of my urine in a 24 hour period... yikes! we were released from the RE yesterday. we talked to her about the clotting issues and basically she said that research indicates that 1 gene doesn't cause a problem. the dr who likes to prescribe blood thinners appears to over medicate and she is familiar with him and said his work 'lacks scientific foundation'... i trust her so i think we'll be ok. baby girl was right on track and her h/b looked great. \

[Alioop12345]

Not sure if I qualify but I'd like to join.... in the hopes that I'll be pg soon. I am 4 months into TTC #2... low progesterone. Does this qualify? Do you have to be pg to join?

[Scooter]

Alioop12345, Not sure if you saw the 1st post of this thread, but let me copy & paste it for you: This thread is for those of us who are pregnant after being treated by a Reproductive Endocrinologist--taking fertility medications, doing IUIs, IVF, using donors. If you have a progesterone issue, while making ttc difficult, it's a little different situation. The ttc threads are all in the Family Planning Threads (http://www.constantchatter.com/forumdisplay.php?f=64) section (right now you're in the Pregnancy and Beyond (http://www.constantchatter.com/forumdisplay.php?f=65) section). You'll find things like the TTC w/Charting and the Still At It threads there. HTH and good luck!

Bernie, great news! How did it go at work?

Amy, that's good news, no blood thinners to worry about! I love those names, but it depends on how popular you want her name to be. With either of those, she's going to know many other little girls with the same name. Such a shame, I had both those names on my list, too, before they got so popular!

QOTD
Ugh, this all-day sickness is getting to me. I had to tell my supervisor the news today because I am feeling like such crap. Anyone have any tips on dealing with it? I was thinking of trying those preggie pops but who knows if they really work. Anyone try them?

We're supposed to drink lots of water but it does NOT make my stomach happy, so I'm sticking to ginger ale & 7up for liquids. :rolleyes: So healthy! I'm trying to eat consistently in small doses--all I seem to be able to consider eating is some pasta and mostly fruits and vegetables. Pretty much all I've had for dinner each night this week is an artichoke and some fruit. I'm trying not to feel too bad about it because at least the foods I can eat are healthy! And I'm eating a few saltines beore I get out of bed in the morning. Any advice would be wonderful. :)

[Alioop12345]

Scooter- Just wanted to let you know that I HAVE been classified with infertility, am being treated by a redproductive endo, and will be on meds.... although I am NOT pg. I think having to go to the doctor 3-4 times a cycle well classifies "infertility" just to try and get PG
oh...also wanted to add that I have endometriosis and have had two laps
Thanks anyway...I'll find the correct place to go

[Kimmiebride]

Alioop, please don't take offense. This is all sensitive stuff, and I tried for 3 heartbreaking years to get pregnant with all kinds of RE/doctor stuff. You asked Scooter if you needed to be pg to join, and she answered you, yes, and we all wish you good luck in your TTC! You only mentioned your progesterone issue in your first post - if you had mentioned the other issues we might have been able to be more specific about a thread in TTC that would address your other issues. It's just that all of us are dealing with different issues and feelings now that we ARE pg after IF/ART, and that's why the thread was formed. The TTC issues and PG issues and feelings overlap, but we are concentrating on where we are now. I hope you are able to join us sooner rather than later. I know it's been hell for us to get here - pain, devastating loss, $$$, tons of doctor visits and issues and surgeries, and hope your journey to TTC #2 is short. Your little girl is adorable. I hope that will be me someday... we take our pregnancies one day at a time and pray for the best, most likely with a little more angst and worry than the "average" pregnant woman, if there is such a thing.
Kimmie

[Alioop12345]

Thanks Kimmie- I did not take offense at the fact that I was told that one must be PG to join....The offense was taken when told that low progesterone did not qualify as infertility. IMO, any time a women needs assistance from drugs or a physician to achieve pg...that qualifies... it just so happens that I have a medial background and am proactive so we have only been TTC #2 for 4 months.

I realize that this is a sensative issue and that we all have lots going on in our lives (for me...I am dealing with a mom with breast CA). I was just upset to get such a repsonse from Scooter. I have no problem looking from support from the appropriate thread and I do apprecaite the direction from both you and Scooter.

[Scooter]

Alioop, yes, exactly what Kimmiebride said. You asked a question & I answered it, explained the section of the forums you are under (because it sounded like you didn't realize you'd navigated over to the pregnancy section from the FP section), and told you where to find real ttc threads. I'm not sure why you seem so upset about it, when you asked if it was the correct place & I gave you an honest answer. If you'd told us any of the stuff you're going through in the first place I could have been more specific in my response to you. The SAI thread would be perfect for you, it's for people who are ttc with IF issues. I know just how stressful & upsetting ttc with IF is, so I won't take it personally, and I hope you do consider joining that other group.

[Scooter]

Ali, agh we crossposted. I see why you were upset, now. When you said "low progesterone" I didn't know what that meant exactly--especially because you didn't mention having an RE. So many women on these boards self-diagnose low progesterone when they're charting, and without more info I didn't know if it was your own diagnosis or a Drs, whether you were being treated for it or were going to prescribe yourself OTC prog cream, or what. You know what I mean? That's why I mentioned both the Charting & SAI threads, because I didn't know where you were coming from. The people who try for a few months & decide they have low prog & treat it themselves--NOT like you--no I do not consider that infertility. Someone who's been diagnosed & treated by an RE, that's different. I've been on progesterone supps for over a year, so I'm not downplaying it!! I hope that makes more sense to you.

[Alioop12345]

Scooter- makes sense...like I said earlier---I was just upset by your response i.e. the implication that low progesterone was not infertility. I HAD not read the first page of the thread...someone on my friends list linked a page from this thread due to one of your members being pg with two sets of twins....how remarkable.
I appreciate the info on the correct place for me to go.

Thanks

[Scooter]

Ali, OK. I am still going to stand by what I said above, that when people say "low prog" it sometimes means infertility & sometimes doesn't. Sorry if that offends you in general.

[Alioop12345]

You are certainly entitled to your opinion......Now, I'm off to try and find where I belong

[ART babies]

Updated to here.

[Kimmiebride]

Hey guys,
I am freaking out here... 8weeks tomorrow and had pink spotting today. I called the advice nurse, who said to take it easy and she'd send a note to my doctor tomorrow. It's pretty much gone now, but of course the anxiety is not. I was thinking about going to the ER, but then it seems like a dumb trip. If everything's ok, it will be okay tomorrow when my doc calls, and if everything's not, they can't do anything anyway. At first I was just so depressed, and then my DH reminded me that it could just work out fine. I know there's no use in worrying, but that's inevitable, since I am so afraid to lose this little one. Ack!
Kimmie

[Scooter]

Kimmie, sorry to hear about the spotting, that's so scary! Take it easy, get off your feet and get lots of rest, ok? And no, that is absolutely not a dumb reason for a trip to the ER. Especially after everything you've been through to get here! Let those ER nurses think what they want; the important thing is that if you want to go, you go and feel better knowing you're doing everything you can. And they could do one thing for you--they can at least do an u/s which might give you some peace of mind. I bet your DH is right, and it was nothing to worry about, but of course how can we not worry? You'll be in my thoughts. :)

[Astro]

Kimmiebride I hope your spotting has gone and you're doing well. :)

[jrsygirl]

hi everyone!- I'm back from Italy. It was a wonderful vacation except that on our anniversary (the 7th) I had some light bleeding and a tiny bit of cloting. It stopped the same day and I've had a tiny bit of dried blood since then. I'm trying not to freak but my gut is telling me I lost at least one of the babies :(
I have our ultrasound at 11am today so keep your fingers crossed for us please! This is the first time we'll see a heart beat too so we're realy nervous since last time thats how we found out I had M/C. There was no HB.

I'll come bak and update you all later!- Hopefully with good news!

[Kimmiebride]

Scooter & Astro, thanks so much for your kind words... it helped a lot. The spotting stopped, and now its just a little bit of brown. I just feel like such a freak! Hoping they'll get me in for a u/s, and if I don't hear from them by tomorrow, I am going into urgent care, where I went after the car accident the day I got my BFP. Maybe they can squeeze me in if OB can't. I just want to know that things are ok before I leave for Boston tomorrow night. Now I wish I didn't have to travel.

jrsygirl, welcome back. I hope you have great news today! Happy Anniversary! mmm, Italy, sounds like a great trip!
Kimmie

[Astro]

jrsygirl Good luck today. I hope you get some good news. :)

[jrsygirl]

Thanks for all your thoughts. I just got back from the Dr's and running a few errands.
The babies are all OK, we saw 4 heart beats (yay!!!) and the RE saw what he thought might be a FIFTH but he couldn't get a good read on it si it might have been just a shadow.

Two of the babies were perfect in size, two were a bit smaller but he wasn't worried- they all had heart beats. He was kind of hoping we wouldn't have 4 still because he knows its harder on us because there is no way I can carry all of them.

He thinks the bleeding was a collapsed sac that just never formed an embryo because he could still see some of it.

I have to go to Columbia Medical next week for some more tests and to meet with a few specialists. They want to do a more high powered US and have me meet with a specialist in reduction to see what they want to do next.

He also has me meeting with a high risk obgyn in addition to the reduction specialist to confirm his thoughts on keeping twins.

[amygrrl]

jrsygirl - glad to hear that things are ok and that your trip was good!

Kimmiebride - did you get in for an u/s?

~~~~~~~~~~~~
update on me - met w/ dr druzin today for the first time since we discussed avery's birth. definitely a different environment than the usual run of the mill ob. first, stanford is a teaching facility which meant that we had a med student w/us who was taking our history and it also meant we got double the procedures since she got a shot at everything first and then the dr did it also. (thank goodness this wasn't true of the pap smear, however)... the dr spent a good 5 -10 minutes on the u/s with the baby showing the student how to do a u/s. also, i'm 9wks1day and they did the abdomonal u/s so things were a bit fuzzy. at one point the peanut kept measuring at 7wk6d, but the dr played with the u/s and it turns out she wasn't showing off a bit of her hiney... so she was really measuring 8wk6d or something like that. anyway, close enough for him to be happy with the measurement. he is upping my thyroid meds while he waits for my latest panel to come back. he also upped my insulin by 2 units at night. hopefully that will kill any high sugars i may be having. he said i have to have appointments with the eye dr and the genetics counselor since i'm over 35 and have GD. i also have to have the level 2 u/s with an echocardiogram on the baby. they took more blood today and scheduled me to come back in 3 weeks. from now until the level 2 u/s at 18 wks it will be every 3 weeks... after this it will go to every 2 wks and once we hit viability (i think 25 wks or so) it will go to wkly appointments to include all sorts of fun tests.

[Kimmiebride]

Greetings from Logan Airport, where we are waiting for the bus to Hyannis, then the ferry to Nantucket, then our rental car and a BED. Flying all night tired me out, but I feel good! I did get in for an u/s, and everything looked good... measuring 2 days ahead, and a nice strong heartbeat again! The NP was really reassuring about the spotting. Said if I needed to come back in again to just call! That felt good. She told me the trip would be fine to take, and just to take it easy and drink plenty of water. the weather looks great here as long as we don't get any remnants of that hurricane that's off shore of the Carolinas... hope no one you know or love is there having to deal with it.
Amy, that's funny... the line at the DMV... Stanford is good though, and I am glad you like your doctor.

jrsy, good luck with the doc!

Ok, I am going to shut off the computer so it's batteries don't die!
Hugs,
Kimmie

[jrsygirl]

Kimmie- Enjoy your vacation. I can totally relate to the stress over the bleeding. I was a wreck in Italy when mine started. I was absolutely convinced I had lost one of the babies and was completely shocked at the US that they were all there and had HB's.

I'm anxiously waiting for the specialist to call me back. They don't have a regular Dr Office at Columbia so I had to call the Dr's asst and leave a message. So annoying especially since my RE really wanted me to get in to see him in the next week. I may ask the RE's office to call if I don't hear from them today.

[angelgirl8]

ack!

sorry i've been away so long and missed so much. that's what a few days on the opposite side of the computer can do for you!

a few things:

been having some pain and off now, which always worries me. i go back and forth between wanting to do some exercise (i started prenatal yoga and a prenatal water aerobics class) and just thinking that if i exercise and something happens it will be my fault. i know that exercising is good for me and the babies and i'll need some stamina for labor, but i worry all the time. i think the infertility makes me worry more and the twins even more!

had my level II u/s yesterday and eveything looks great! the babies are amazing. the only problem is that one of baby B's kidney's has extra fluid in it. they'll watch that and hope it resolves. if not, they'll do an u/s on the baby at birth and figure out where to go from there. apparently, it's fairly common and the dr. said not to worry. honestly, i'm not worrying (that much).

nausea is finally fading!! replaced by sleeping issues and back pain, but i'll take that any day.

jrsygirl and kimmie...glad to hear everything went well with your ultrasounds!

hi to everyone!

[Scooter]

Thought I'd bump us up! How is everyone doing?

Things are decent for me, still having the constant nausea and deheydration (drinking much liquid makes me gag for some reason). But hey, it can't last longer than 7 more months, so at least the end is in sight. As compared the side effects from the fertility meds, because who knew how long I'd be dealing with those! So I'm just trying to stay positive and eat whatever I can. :)

Hope everyone is well.

[angelgirl8]

scooter...i couldn't really drink water in the beginning. when i could, i would have juice or ginger ale or even seltzer. adding lemon and ice to water helped, too!

things are good here. i'm 20 weeks today! seems completely crazy.

of course, i've spent the last few days panicking, but that's just me!

[Kimmiebride]

Hi gang,
bumping us up from the depths... Scooter, hope you're feeling better! and Angelgirl8, wowowow!!! you're more than half way there! So cool! Hope you're not panicking anymore!

I am 10w0d today. Had my first appointment on Friday, and I like my new doctor. She upped my thyroid meds, put me on tums for calcium as there is anectdotal research that shows it reduced the risk for pre-eclampsia in people with high blood pressure, and mine has been inching up there. She also scheduled my other tests, and will keep a close eye on me due to my advanced maternal age... I appreciate the extra care, and I promised to try not to be one of those moms that call about every little twinge. She said I could call whenever I needed to. I felt reassured that we're on the same team. Saw the wiggly little one on an u/s, but the picture was crap so we didn't print it. Sure wish I was going to the u/s tech in Oakland as their machine is much crisper. Saw the heartbeat, and she didn't measure the CRL, since I had just had another u/s two weeks ago, and the machine was so crappy. My next appointment is a buddy group on October 11, where they will go over a bunch of stuff with a group that is due relatively the same time. That will be kind of neat to meet some people IRL that are going through the same stuff. I think we have decided to do the amnio, though I am still on the fence a little bit... DH said he would want to know if anything was wrong in advance. I am being ultra-positive, and have decided that there is nothing wrong with this little gift, and am thinking constant positive, healthy thoughts!
Kimmie

[catJennifer]

Well, I'm ready to join.

Here's my info:
Me: 30
DH: 31
TTC since: 5/04
TTC issues: PCOS, elevated prolactin
protocol conceived with: injectibles (Follistim), IUI
BFP: 9/6/05
due date: 5/16/05


Today, I am 7w1d. :D I had my first ultrasound last week and saw and heard the heartbeat. Now this feels real for me!!! I'm scheduled to have another scan next Wednesday. I feel great, just eating ALL THE TIME. At times I wish I would feel bad, after going through so much to get here, but I'm sure that will come.

How long has everyone stayed with their RE? My appointment next week is my last one. How long is everyone waiting to tell family, etc. I have a few close friends who know, only because they know the right questions to ask :)

Our plan is not to tell family until after 12w.


Jennifer

[Kimmiebride]

Congratulations Jennifer!
Once my RE's office confirmed the pregnancy with an u/s I was "graduated" and had to go find an OB. We didn't wait at all to tell family - we knew how much everyone was pulling for us, and we wanted all the prayers and positive thoughts we could get right away, so we told as soon as the BFP was confirmed with the beta hcg. We knew we'd never be able to make it on our own dealing with a loss without the support of our families, so we shared the news with his parents, my mom and a few close friends. I know this varies for everyone, but there would have been no way I could have kept this quiet for 12 weeks. We had been trying for 3 years, and I wanted to shout from the rooftops.

At times I wish I would feel bad, after going through so much to get here, but I'm sure that will come.

I can relate to that comment for sure! I never did get m/s, and at 10w2d, I am still waiting to feel bad. Sometimes you just don't. I am tired all the time, sore bbs, crampy as my belly grows, but that's really it so far.
Great to have you here!
Kimmie

[jrsygirl]

At times I wish I would feel bad, after going through so much to get here, but I'm sure that will come.
i said this exact same thing last week (I'm 9W 4D) and am convinced I cursed myself. I've been so sick ever since. Gagging and throwing up. Yuck. now I'm kicking myself for cursing my good luck!

Just enjoy that you're feeling well! I sure wish i was.

As for telling people we haven't told anyone yet but are planning on telling my family this weekend, work next week and his family next week too. We've had three good ultrasounds (I'm having twins so I go in every two weeks).. I really don't have much of a choice. I went to the OBGYN yesterday and he measured my belly which is the size of 14-15 weeks and I'm only 9!! so its becoming pretty obvious that I'm pg :D

[Bernie]

I'm 17 weeks today - counting down the days until my big u/s (next Tuesday). Looking forward to 1) making sure A & B are still okay in there, and 2) finding out what we're having.

catJennifer -- Congratulations! I stayed with my RE until week 8. I went for weekly ultrasounds from week 4 through week 8, and at week 8, they released me to my OB.
We told most of our closer friends and family pretty early on - most of them knew we were doing IVF (it was much harder to hide that cycle!). We told the rest of our friends around 12 weeks, and I came out at work at 14 weeks.

Question for you ladies - although it might be more relevant to those who are having multiples --

How freely do you volunteer the information that you had medical assistance achieving this pregnancy? Whenever someone finds out that we are having twins, they immediately ask whether twins run in our families (they don't). If I know the person reasonably well, I usually explain how we wound up with twins, but if I don't, I generally just smile and say "we got really lucky."
I'm not at all ashamed of the fact that we used IVF to get here - I'm just not sure that everyone needs to know that. Just curious to see how everyone else is dealing with this.

Hope everyone has a great day!

[angelgirl8]

At times I wish I would feel bad, after going through so much to get here, but I'm sure that will come.

dh makes fun of me (mean) because i said the same thing and then complained when i was so sick! feel good!

bernie...

I generally just smile and say "we got really lucky."

that's a really really good response!

my grandfather is actually a twin, so i just answer that in big groups and to general semi-strangers. to everyone else, i tell them we did IVF. i'm proud of everything we went through to get here and people are usually pretty good about it!

jennifer...welcome! we were released from my RE at 9 weeks after weekly ultrasounds. we told immediate family and friends who knew we were doing IVF right away and the rest of the world at 12 weeks right after we got our nuchal results.

____

things are good here...having tons of braxton-hicks contractions which make me so nervous. i'm terrified of pre-term labor. terrified.

[ART babies]

Updated to here.

[AusMarchBride]

[QUOTE=angelgirl8]my grandfather is actually a twin, so i just answer that in big groups and to general semi-strangers. to everyone else, i tell them we did IVF. i'm proud of everything we went through to get here and people are usually pretty good about it!


I tell everyone we did IVF. For 2 reasons, first, as angelgirl said, I'm proud of what DH and I went through to fall pregnant, and second, so that if someone has questions (and especially if they are contemplating IVF) they feel its ok to then ask questions. I've had 3 friends (not close, more friends of friends) tell me they are about to go down the IVF road, and could they ask me some questions about it.

Before I started my IVF, I had a very close friend do IVF for a couple of years. She was very open with everyone about how she was doing while cycling, and so when we started to go down the IVF road, I knew I could ask her questions and she would help out. So I want to make sure I can try to do that for someone else. Pay it forward I guess :D

I think there used to be a stigma about doing IVF, but not so much any more, and I'll do what I can in my circle of friends and acquaintances to make sure people are aware and if they want to, understand it.

Phew, that was a long answer to Bernie's question :D

catJennifer Welcome and congratulations. We made the big announcement at 12 weeks after our good CVS results. Family and some friends already knew because I had told them we were doing IVF. My RE signed me off at about 7 weeks so your timing sounds pretty normal. I then didn't see my OB until 11.5 weeks or so.

Hi to everyone else. For those who are suffering from morning sickness, you have my sympathies. Mine finally eased off last week at 19.5 weeks. It sucked big time until then. Much better now but I still get the queasies, and I couldn't cook again last night. For those who aren't suffering morning sickness, I'm soooo jealous ;)

Everything else is good here. I'm 20 weeks today so halfway there. Can't quite believe it.

[catJennifer]

Thanks for the great welcome everyone!!!

Just my input, even though we didn't do IVF, I have told many friends about our struggles with infertility. So many people deal with this issue, I believe it is beneficial to share whatever info we have. I know that it had been invaluable to me to not feel "like I was the only one."

For everyone with morning sickness, I hope you all feel better soon!!

Jennifer

[amygrrl]

bumping us from the depths....

had the 12 wk appointment today. princess pumpkinhead was all squirmy and cute on the u/s. next tuesday we have the nuchal fold scan with blood test and an EKG they are making me have. it feels like i'm at the dr every week. no wait... i am!

on a happy note, the dr cleared me to have my hair dyed. i'm going to go in in 2 weeks or so. that way, i think i'll be able to just have it done 1 more time during the pregnancy. very vain, i know... but i can't stand the grey.

[Kimmiebride]

Amy... nothing vain about that... I am feeling just the same - sort of like a skunk stripe of grey down my otherwise red mane... I am gonna check with the doc at my next appointment. Glad to hear your appointment went well!
Kimmie

[bottleored]

Hi Ladies .... popping in to say I'm back :D and cautiously optimistic.

Betas were 109 (14DPO) and 461 (17DPO). Much better than last cycle. Still no real m/s. Next beta will be Tuesday and I have an u/s scheduled Friday. Probably no heartbeat yet, but at least 'a bubble in the right place' (says my RE). I'll keep you posted.

[Bernie]

bottleored - Yay!!:D Sending lots of sticky vibes your way! I hope to hear more good news next week.
And don't worry about the lack of m/s - I'm at week 18 and I still haven't had any!

[Astro]

Bottleored CONGRATULATIONS! I'm very happy for you and hope you have a wonderful 9 months.

[kat]

How did I not know that this thread existed? I feel as if I've been living under a rock or something. :D

Anyway, can I join?

Me: 36 (will be 37 when they're born, we hope!)
DH: 41
TTC since 12/03
Dx: unexplained infertility
m/c (after getting pregnant w/out intervention) in 10/04
Four rounds of Clomid, all BFN
Pregnant with boy-girl twins after IVF #1 (June '05)
40-week due date is 3.2.06

(and congratulations, bottleored!)

Bernie asked a question a while back about telling people we did IVF. I *thought* I would want to tell everyone who asked about the twins (which is basically everyone) that we did IVF, but in reality I haven't. I just feel weird telling most of the people I talk to, mainly because they're students and fellow colleagues. I don't want my students to know that much info about me, and I don't want to tell my colleagues because I feel like they'd think that since it was IVF, I could've timed it better. (One of my former colleagues did IVF twice and had both her kids in the summer -- as it is, I'm causing some pretty huge scheduling problems for the spring).

If it's a good friend, s/he might already know about our IVF anyway (many of them do). But I have "issues" with some other acquaintances that make me not want to tell them. For some reason, I'd feel compelled (mainly to protect my DH's dignity, which is totally silly because I'm sure he doesn't give a damn about that) to tell them that it was "unexplained" infertility. And that increases the TMI factor, so I just usually keep my mouth shut and smile.

In other words, it depends on the relationship, but I don't feel comfortable going into any details with anyone except our closest friends.

[Kimmiebride]

Carolyn, that's wonderful news!! Sticky vibes to you, and so happy you are here again!!!!!
Kimmie

PS welcome to Kat!

[ART babies]

Updated to here.

Caroline, welcome back! That 2nd beta looks great, and what a relief after what you went through before. I'm staying optimisitc for you with your upcoming beta and u/s. Let me know when you're ready for me to put your stats up (although I was excited and did put your name up already ;) ).

Kat, welcome! Sorry you didn't know about this thread. I posted it in the IVF thread but I know that thing moves fast sometimes.

[Scooter]

Just when I thought my m/s was getting better, I've had several days in a row of the worst it's been so far. I haven't been eating or drinking much because of the nausea. [TMI ahead! I think I spend most of my day walking from place to place wondering 'if I start to throw up right now, where would be a good place...?'] Anyway, now I'm totally dehydrated, but drinking is still hard on my stomach.

So today I started cramping and it scared the **** out of me. First I had those stabbing twinges, that I am assuming is the uterus stretching, and then it turned into occasional but repeated cramping. I read in my books that cramping can be from dehydration, so I'm trying to up my fluids. Tuesday will be my 1st ob appointment, I haven't even met this Dr yet. I don't know if I should be concerned, if I should call, if I'm not doing something I should be, if I'm causing the baby some type of harm--I'm trying not to panic but I'm not sure what to do. :( Sorry this is so long-winded, but if anyone has any advice or experience I'd love to hear!

[Kimmiebride]

Hi Scooter, I am just a few days ahead of you, but I also had cramping this week accompanied by brown spotting:eek: . When I frantically called the advice nurse she said it's very common at this point in the pregnancy because the uterus is really stretching, the tissue in it is building and there is often some cramping and old blood that goes along with it. So, yours could be partially due to the dehydration and also the 11 week crampers... Hope you feel better soon! Man, it's so hard not to worry about every little thing isn't it? I just keep thinking that I am doing something wrong somewhere and am harming the little one in some way. I think it natural to feel like this, especially after all we all went through to get here. I am looking forward to feeling movement, and to my next u/s so we can check in on the little one and hear the heart beat. I still think I'll panic all the time though...
Kimmie

[Scooter]

Kimmie, you have no idea how much better that makes me feel! Thank you! I drank as much as I could last night and this morning am feeling more human again. But DH & I were both happy to hear cramping now is normal. It makes sense, the baby is just going to get bigger and bigger at this point, since the internal orgns have been formed already.

[amygrrl]

welcome kat & caroline!

scooter - i had cramping off and on most of my first trimester with avery. i think it's just the normal stretching stuff. this time i haven't had much cramping, but i just think it's because my everything had so recently been stretched. although i still get these horrible sharp pains in my hips when i cough or sneeze... also, my m/s hits hard around the 11th week too... maybe it's a girl???

[Scooter]

Amy, it's so weird things changed this week, because my 9th week I was having hours where I felt almost decent. I thought the worst of it was over--maybe that's where I went wrong. I tempted Fate. ;) I still get those sharp pains, too, I was wondering if it's cyst related. You were so convinced it's a boy before, do you think the m/s matters? My mom had the same experience with both of her pregnancies, just nausea no m/s, and one was a girl, one a boy. So I'm trying not to put much stock in how I'm feeling being related to the sex. :confused:

Speaking of which, does anyone have any recommendations on baby name books?

[amygrrl]

scooter - never fear. the moment you think you are done with the puking, the baby finds the button once more. i think they do it just to remind you who's really in control. :D i can go almost a full week with nothing and think i'm turning the corner, only to be followed by a day where everything that enters my mouth comes up.

[Scooter]

Amy, on that front I've been lucky in a way. I am not puking, just constantly feeling like I about to & gagging a lot. Not really sure what's worse. But it's so funny how you can eat one thing and then a couple hours later just thinking of that food makes you start to gag! (How many lurkers do you think this conversation will drive away??)

[angelgirl8]

stopping in quickly to say hi! i think i might be coming down with a cold, which sucks. especially since DH is away for the weekend and i am already in need of help getting up!

things are good here. contractions are still around, but they are "unproductive" according to my cervix. i had a growth scan on tuesday, and they'll also do a cervical length check and a check of baby B's kidney. i'm tired and big, but otherwise i really am feeling pretty good.

along those lines...

scooter...a few things: 1. i had mucho cramping around 11/12 weeks, which drove me crazy and made me horribly nervous. doctor said it was normal and to drink tons of water and put my feet up. the theory is that the uterus is a muscle and if you're dehydrated, the muscles contract and cramp. 2. i've also been told that a lot of women get cramping and even spotting (like, you, kimmiebride) around the weeks when your period would be due. 8 weeks, 12 weeks, etc. my dates were a little off, but i cramped around 11 weeks, around 15 weeks. 3. the nausea. mine got a bit better for a few days at 10/11 weeks but was back in full swing by 12 weeks. don't let anyone fool you with the magic 1st trimester ending=no more m/s crap!

bottleored...welcome back! i saw your news in SAI and was waiting until you got here!


hope everyone is well!

[Kimmiebride]

Ahhhhh, must remember to drink more water. I know I haven't been having enough lately. It's so good to hear that we're "normal"! I have been nauseous too, but only threw up once so far. It gets worse in the car. I have a pretty iron clad stomach, and the last time I threw up a lot was a bout of food poisoning in 2001. I just fight it, and consider myself lucky that I can. I would almost rather be throwing up than have annoying spotting if I could pick my symptoms... It all makes sense, but it's still worrisome, no matter how hard I try not to worry!
Off to grab some water and put my feet up!
Kimmie

[AusMarchBride]

Hi ladies, sorry I haven't dropped in for a while.

angelgirl saidthe nausea. mine got a bit better for a few days at 10/11 weeks but was back in full swing by 12 weeks. don't let anyone fool you with the magic 1st trimester ending=no more m/s crap!

So true, mine eased off finally at about 19.5 weeks, but I still have evenings where there is no way I can cook a meal for DH. This first trimester thing is total b/s.

Scooter I am not puking, just constantly feeling like I about to & gagging a lot. Not really sure what's worse. But it's so funny how you can eat one thing and then a couple hours later just thinking of that food makes you start to gag! This was me too, I didn't ever throw up, although I came awfully close. Mine was nausea alone, and it got progressively worse throughout the day. Mine also seemed to ease for a few days at around 13 weeks, and then returned with a vengeance. Makes it difficult to feel like you're really enjoying the pregnancy. I know I sat there in tears quite a few nights saying to my DH "I know I wanted this, and we worked hard to do IVF and all that, but I'm really not enjoying being pregnant". But now that the m/s has eased off, and I'm feeling the baby kicking all the time, it's a lot more enjoyable. Hang in there.

Hi to kat and welcome and congrats to bottleored

I had an interesting experience with regard to the telling people about doing IVF thing on the weekend. We were at a fundraising night for my nephew's scout group, and a friend of a friend came up to me and said congrats, I heard you were pregnant. She then said that her friend (who we know quite well and had told that we did IVF) had mentioned we did IVF, and could she ask me a question. I said of course, and she proceeded to pick my brain for about 15 mins as she and her DH are intending tosee an RE to do IVF soon. I was fine with telling her all the nitty gritty details. I have to say I felt really good at being able to just give her some information from someone who had actually done it, not just the textbook stuff.

Amy and kimmiebride I had the grey hairs showing through and finally went and got my highlights done at around 13 weeks, I waited until after the 1st trimester. I'm nearly ready to go again. If that's vain, I'm cool with it ;)

All going well here, cannot believe I'm past halfway. I'm starting to enjy the pregnancy more, but of course there's still worries. Now I worry when I haven't felt the baby kick for a day or so and spent from 3-5am this morning awake stressing over that fact. But of course, once I woke up later on, it was kicking like a mad thing.

I don't think the worry ever ends. As my MIL says, you stop worrying about your children when you close your eyes for the last time. And I think she's spot on :)

[amygrrl]

first... bumping us up from the depths.

can't believe i'm 13wks and officially into the 2nd trimester. dang it... time flies. nuchal scan was yesterday and went fine. pumpkinhead was wiggling for us. have to go see the gestational diabetes person tomorrow to talk about my meds. then on the 25th we see dr druzin again then a few weeks later we have our level II u/s... wow...
------------
usMarchBride - you will absolutely worry forever!
Kimmiebride - how is the spotting?

[Kimmiebride]

Wow Amy... 2nd Tri!!! Yipee!! only a few more days for me too!! Still spotting off and on, always brown, and just annoying. I hope it stops after I stop the progesterone supps which will be tonight I think. Because I read so much on the internet, I think maybe it might be a subchorionic hematoma or something like that. The nurses have said not to worry unless it turns red, gets heavy or comes with cramps other than the little ones.

I agree... we will absolutely worry forever!
Kimmie

[amygrrl]

Kimmiebride - during my pregnancy with avery, i had spotting off and on until i stopped the suppositories. my doc said that the cervix fills with more blood when your preggers and the suppositories irritate the cervix. with the extra blood, it's more likely you'll get a little bleed. sure enough, as soon as i stopped them the spotting stopped.

[Jad]

Hiya, folks! So very glad to be able to join you over here.

K, 34
P, 33
TTC since 1/04, then 6/04
TTC issues: MFI (low morphology)
Conceived on IVF #2
Due date: 6/20/2006

I'm not feeling too nervous at the moment, but I think that's mostly because it still feels so unreal. I'm assuming that'll change at some point. I go in for my first (OB) u/s next Friday. I'm curious to see whether we've got one or two growing in there.

[junkinmytrunk]

Scooter: Just popping in to check on you. Glad to read everything is going A-OK. Looks to me like you're almost out of your 1st tri. I swear you'll feel better once you hit 14 weeks - it's like a miracle, really!

If you don't mind, I'll keep tabs on ya thru this thread. Truthfully, I probably should have joinedthis thread -- not sure why I never did!!

Take care and congrats to all the mommy's 2 be here!

[bottleored]

Thanks for the warm welcome ladies. My 3rd beta (22DPO) was 2460, so it's looking good. I had the tiniest bit of spotting (read - no other human being would have noticed it) over the weekend. I was convinced it was over. It stopped, then I got the 2460 number. U/s is tomorrow. Will I ever stop checking the tp?:o

My only symptoms so far have been 'burning' nips :o and a general distaste for most foods. I'm just trying to find things that sound good. One night I had a hard boiled egg and oatmeal for dinner (not together!). Today it was a cream cheese and jelly sandwich (which didn't satisfy), then a small frozen pizza :o . I also have kind of a burning in my throat, like acid reflux :confused:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bernie thanks for the reassurance about no m/s - and you've got 2 babies in there!

kat welcome!

Scooter thanks for adding me back to the roster. I guess my stats are
bottleored
Me: Caroline
DH: Paul
Married: 10.11.03
TTC: 1.04
TTC issues: immunity issues, m/c 9.05
Successful Protocol: Gonal-F, low dose hCG, Lovenox (blood thinner), Metformin, Progesterone
due June 12, 2006

can you take my name out of 'in our thoughts and prayers'? Thanks.

I'm sorry your m/s has gotten so bad! How was your ob appointment? Glad your cramping has subsided!

angelgirl glad to hear you're feeling better.

AnnI don't think the worry ever ends. As my MIL says, you stop worrying about your children when you close your eyes for the last time. And I think she's spot on How true is that!

amygrrl congrats on being in the 2nd tri!

Jad welcome and congratulations! We'll be in the June Mommies group together (when I feel confident enough to actually join!)

junkinmytrunk it's never too late to join :cool:

[bottleored]

Had my u/s this morning and everything looked good - well, the tech said it looked good - how am I to know ;) I did get a printout. :D

We also got the genetic tests back, which were normal. Big relief. I'm resting a bit easier with those 2 pieces of news.

Next week brings another u/s, which should show the heartbeat - amazing! For those that have had early transvaginal u/s, are you able to hear the heartbeat with those machines? I don't know why I think they're so much different than the 'tummy' ones. Of course I've never heard noises come out from them either :rolleyes:

[angelgirl8]

bottleored...

Will I ever stop checking the tp?

ummm...no. i'm still checking every time! but i'm a little nutty!

so glad the u/s went well and your beta numbers look fantastic! as for the transvaginal u/s: it depends on whether your doctor's office has a machine with sound, but we heard the heartbeats the very first time we saw them at 6w5d. i totally thought we'd only see them and then they put on the sound and i nearly fell off the table!

[kat]

Check me in to Toilet-Paper-Checkers Anonymous, too!

Welcome bottleored and Jad! Jad, thanks for posting your due date....that was my next question for you (cuz I'm too lazy to figure it out myself LOL). (Jad and I know each other IRL

Junk/Lisa: c'mon - join! All the cool kids are doin' it. :D

Happy weekend, everyone!

[amygrrl]

bottlered - it's the same machine, just a different transducer (or wand)... one made for the outside and one made for the inside. ;) the difference is if the machine has sound.

if i remember correctly, they can hear it that early, but they usually catch the sound waves on the machine in addition to seeing the flutter. then they measure the distance from the same point on one wave to the other to determine the heart rate. i think the earliest they did it with sound for me was when they moved over to doppler.

[AusMarchBride]

Check me in to Toilet-Paper-Checkers Anonymous, too!

Fully paid up member here also :D

bottleored Congrats, it sounds like everything is going great.

[Jad]

bottleored - Sounds like you're ready to join the June group! ;) Congrats on the good u/s. I have my first one on Friday and I can't wait.

angel - I guess I must still be pregnant because this:
i totally thought we'd only see them and then they put on the sound and i nearly fell off the table!
made me all teary. :rolleyes:

kat - I've been thinking about my due date a lot. I guess it never really occurred to me how incredibly long I'd be pregnant. Of course, I realize that's a newly pregnant perspective and by May I'll be shocked at how fast it's gone. But still.

As for the "not nervous yet", well, it's amazing the difference a couple of days can make. I've officially joined TPCA and am finding lots to worry about. I've been having lots of trouble breathing. My allergist has said to take my asthma meds as often as I need and come in Monday, but, of course, I'm worried about the whole thing. Then there's the small slice of cappacino cake that I had last night (brought to us by dinner guests) that made me feel like crap and that I'm now convinced was the worst thing ever to do. <sigh> I'm just so afraid I'll screw everything up.

[kat]

Jad: once you have enough of those "weird symptoms" and "little screwups" under your belt (cuz there will be plenty) and everything still is fine, I promise you'll start to worry a little less.

Oh, and I don't think our RE's office uses the sound function on the dildocam....at least we didn't hear it. In fact, we had to have him SLOW THE HELL DOWN and show us where the heartbeats were, because he saw them so quickly he just kinda brushed by them. He (Dr. K) was really good about it, but just be forewarned.

I cannot wait to find out whether you're having one or two!

[bottleored]

Thanks ladies for your reassurances that I'm not losing my mind :) Or that if I am, I'm in good company.
Check me in to Toilet-Paper-Checkers Anonymous, too!Hi, I'm Caroline and I am a habitual toilet paper checker.

Jad I totally hear you on the breaking down thing. I don't think I realized how stressed I was making myself until Saturday night. I had a complete breakdown, telling my DH I felt like I was keeping myself in some type of 'bubble' - no drinking, watching everything I ate, overreacting to any sensation in my body ('is it m/s? is it cramping? is it gas?:o '). We haven't told anyone yet, so I feel to a certain extent that I'm depriving myself of the excitement. We'll probably tell my parents after we see the heartbeat.

kat The u/s techs at my REs are the best. I asked if it was o.k. for my DH to come on Friday and she said that many women bring their DHs, some bring their mothers, fathers, MIL, SIL, friend, neighbor ...... That would be way too much information for any of those people!

The days are going by so slowly. I just want it to be 12 weeks already - it seems like only yesterday we were starting the cycle and that was 6 weeks ago!

[jrsygirl]

Hi everyone..i haven't posted in a few weeks..i've been just trying to make it day by day though this pregnancy.

Last week I had a business meeting in Houston. I flew out at 5 am and met my coworker. we had a full day of meetings and briefings which was good.

I left my meeting and was feeling fine. No cramping or soreness.. then at the airport while waiting for my flight..I literally stood up and could feel the gush of liquid. I ran to the bathroom and there was a ton of bright red blood and a clot about two inches around..I was so scared..I've had some small amounts of spotting but nothing like this. I really thought it was one of the sacs and have never been more scared. I managed to clean up a little and get a few pads, found a quiet place to sit, called Brian and freaked him out. He called the Dr office because it was after hours and left a message with the answering service.

The Dr called back in like 5 mins and they wanted me to go to the emeregency room in houston..unfortunately my flight home (the last of the day) was in a half hour. I really just wanted to be home and I figured if I had miscarried there was nothing they could do anyway. I made the choice to fly home. It was horrible. with all the weather and turbulence and stress of the situation, not to mention that I had been up since 4am!..Anyway- during the flight the bleeding had stopped to intermittent spotting but I got up every five minutes to check. Luckily I had an aisle seat!

I got home around 2 am, showered, cleaned up and passed out. Overnight the bleeding stopped and now there is just a bit of dried blood.

I went to the OB at 1:30 and amazingly -all is well. the little heartbeats looked good and no more bleeding. both sacs looked fine.

The dr thinks it may be that the placentas are low and that some blood had built up beind them and was being blocked by a clot that worked its way out. regardless there is no sign of internal bleeding and all the placentas are fine he just thinks there isn't much room in there and there is bound to be some bleeding.

Friday night I had a little more bleeding but nothing like Wednesday so I didn't panic- just stayed on the couch all weekend.

I have my regulaly scheduled OBGYN tomorrow and then the first appt with the high risk specialist on Thursday.

This pregnancy is literally day by day. i guess I can't take anything for granted or be sure of anything until these little guys are born.

[angelgirl8]

jrsygirl...so scary! i'm so so glad everything is okay. take it easy!

___

the big thing (besides for me!) that i'm dealing with now is stuff: we're superstitious to start with and with everything we had to do to get these babies, we're having a hard time deciding how to prepare for them. we don't really want to have anything in the apt for them before they're born, but i know some stuff we'll have to have for when we all get back from the hospital.

but i don't want to wait too long to pick stuff out because who knows if i'll have to go on bed rest or they'll come early or what! quite the dilemma.

we don't have a second room in our apartment so i don't have to worry about nursery decorating or picking out furniture or anyhing...it's just all the other stuff!

[Kimmiebride]

bumping us up... How's everyone doing?

The spotting has let up - Amy that made me feel so much better. I like there to be a reason for things! I am sick with an upper respiritory infection and went to see my regular doc today. Not getting any meds - seeing if it will clear up on its own. I am miserable.

OB appointment tomorrow - should cheer me up - we hope to hear the heartbeat and see a little peak at the baby!
Take care everyone,
Kimmie

[Scooter]

Welcome to Jad and welcome back to Caroline! :) Good to see you both here after your long journeys. :)

Junk/Lisa, you can lurk if you want but I think you should join, too!

I've finally done the updates, sorry it's taken so long. If anyone wants to help me update the thread, the offer's still open to have another threadmistress.

Things are ok here. Having morning sickness is really a wonderful thing that I am lucky to be experiencing at all. I know that. And at the same time, having morning sickness, while you're this tired and working, is REALLY hard to deal with. It's affecting my work and my relationship with my husband (he's been so great--I've done nothing but rely on him, but it's driving him insane), which I never really figured into the equation when I thought about getting pg. I guess I allowed myself too often to have this little fantasy that I'd feel great--or just nauseus for a few weeks or so--and still be productive at work and home. And all the while feel blissfully happy. That's not quite how I'd describe the reality. ;) Two more days till the 2nd trimester, so I'm trying to hang on a little while longer before resorting to any medication. Thinking of all of you.

[bottleored]

We saw the heartbeat today :D :D Amazing how such a tiny little flicker can cause so much emotion. It was 123 bpm, which she said would increase each week. I was a little concerned that she measured the baby at 5w6d when (according to all my charts, triggers, IUI and b/w), I should be 6w4d. Both the tech and my RE said it was fine and that they'll measure every week. I think I'll be o.k. with that - I'm more concerned that I have a correct due date! Did anyone else have such a dating discrepancy with an early u/s?

Other than that, just low grade nausea. Still getting b/w twice a week, seeing my RE once a week. I'll be with him until about 12 weeks.

I'm actually starting to believe it - and checking the tp with less anxiety (still checking, though ;) )

jrsygirl what a scare! I'm so glad you and the babies are fine. How did your appointments go this week?

angelgirl will you have any help (family, friends) after the babies are born? I'm sure you don't have to stress much - babies don't need too much when they're first born (of course someone can quote me on this when I'm freaking out in 7 months!). I guess it is easier to pick things out when you're not sleep deprived!

kimmie glad you're feeling better - how did your appointment go?

scooter ugh - I'm sorry you're feeling so bad! So far my nausea hasn't gotten in the way of anything, but I have been fearing (since reading several ladies having major problems) the effect it would have on my work day. I forget - have you told them at work? I know that if my nausea ever gets worse, I could tell my boss (that I'm pg - which I don't plan on doing until after Thanksgiving) and she'd be awesome about it. Hang in there!!

[bottleored]

I also meant to add that I got a little concerned that my last b/w didn't double as fast (71 hours) as the first few did (doubling in less than 50 hours). Then I actually looked at one of the charts on www.ivfer.com that said that after you reach 6,000, they expect doubling time to slow to 96 hours. Just thought I'd add that in as an FYI!

[jrsygirl]

Bottleored i wouldn't worry too much I think it will vary a bit based upon how big the baby will ultimately be. Mine were measuring two different sizes so it really does vary. They will set your due date by the date of your last period. my RE told me what mine was even though it wasn't my actual last period date based upon when I started the FD's and the date he did the IUI.


My appointments they all went well. the one yesterday was just exhasusting because they did so much testing. They did a super long ultrasound (almost 2 hours) and looked at every detail. It was really cool to see that much detail of the babies and how much they have changed just since my ultrasound last week even! One of the babies was waving and they got a pic of it..so cute. Brian swears he saw the little boy parts but the US tech who specializes in multiples wouldn't confirm/deny.
Anyway- while I loved seeing all that- being on my back and in one position for so long made me really nauseous.

They were able to find the source of the bleeding. i have two large hematomas in my left uterus. They said eventually they will pass and not to freak out. They said the clot that I passed last week was probably another one. They are formed because there isn't much room in there and that when the implantation occurred it probably moved around a bit before it stuck and caused some bruising/bleeding in the process and then it didn't have anywhere to go because the baby was blocking it. Now that they are moving around a bit more they are being released.

They said they actually worry more when they see a multiple pregnancy that doesn't have any bleeding.

So that was a relief!

I have another US next week. I sure am glad that we have insurance and that we don't have to pay all this!

[Jad]

Looks like we've got one baby growin' in there. RE said everything looked fine, but I cried on my way out of the office because it didn't look like anything but a big empty follicle to me. If we're supposed to be able to see a heartbeat in a week, shouldn't we be able to see *something* besides the yolk sac? I know I shouldn't worry. I even made the RE come out and tell me it's fine a second time. But I'm still feeling crampy on occasion and nothing else, so I'm just afraid this one won't turn out to be viable either. Crossing my fingers that we see that heartbeat on the 1st.

bottleored - So exciting that you saw the heartbeat! Can't wait to be there myself.

Kimmie - Hope you saw a lovely little heartbeat, too.

scooter - Tomorrow marks 2nd tri for you? Wow! That's fantastic!

kat - I kept in mind that Dr. K is speedy w/ the dildocam. But I couldn't think what to ask him to show me. He didn't make it sound like there was any actual baby to see. I suppose I should have asked him to point out the yolk sac. Maybe it would've made me feel better.

angel - Can you buy stuff and leave it at your parents' house? Then they could just bring it to you when it's time. That way you have it ready, but don't have to have it in your apartment. Could be a compromise.

And a big HI to anyone I missed or that's in lurk mode right now!

[Kimmiebride]

Hey there... Jad, sorry you didn't see more, but that's perfectly normal! Hoping next week you see more! We had our first u/s in radiology with the good machines at 6w4d, and that was when we saw the embryo. Try not to worry... I know that's so not easy when you've been through all that...

Scooter, hope you are feeling better soon. Welcome to the second tri!!!

Jrsygirl, glad there is an explanation on the clot... that must have been so scary, especially to not be at home when it happened.

waiting for DH to get home to go to the appointment - Can't wait...
BBL to post about it!
Kimmie

[Kimmiebride]

Update - cute little ultra sound, but no doppler... maybe next time. S/he's looking good, so much more like an actual baby! My big u/s is 11/21, and my next appt. is 12/2. I am scheduled for the AFP along with another thyroid test, and 1 hr glucose test on 11/21 as well to monitor me for GD (due to my weight and age...) My 24 hr urine test was normal, and the UTI is gone... now if I can only get rid of my cold, I'll be feeling good!
:)
Kimmie

[amygrrl]

time flies... nuchal fold results came back stellar. basically, the odds of downs or a trisomy dropped to about as low as they can given my age. 1 in 4600 for downs and 1 in 8700 for a trisomy. with the exception of puking last night (which really happened b/c i had a sudden bout of deathly fear which comes on occassionally since getting pregnant with this one) i haven't puked in 2 weeks so i'm thinking this little pumpkinhead my be taking it easy on her mama. also starting to feel the beginnings of movenment which is totally cool. before it turns to full on flutters, it sort just feels like when your tummy grumbles only way down low. so i would never even notice it if i hadn't been preggers before. so i figure in the next 2 weeks i might be getting the real flutter sensations.


--------------------

Kimmiebride - yeah for a cute baby on an u/s.... they always face the transducer head on so all we get are these scary alien/ skeletor views.

Jad - totally normal... you'll be amazed by what can grow in there in a week!

jrsygirl - glad everything looks good. i had a hematoma at the beginning of this pregnancy which disappeared pretty quickly.

bottleored- yup... pretty much everytime you go early on you'll get a new due date. it's difficult for them to measure and each person measures a little differently.

Scooter - think shakes... jack in the box just started doing there fall shake.. pumpkin pie. go have one for me since i'm not allowed.

angelgirl8 - maybe buy some stuff and keep it at your parents' house??

[bottleored]

Jad The only thing we saw at 5w was a sac (a white circle) and what the u/s tech thought was a yolk sac. She said the yolk sac starts out bigger than the baby. Totally normal. Can't wait for you to see the heartbeat next week - it's amazing that it's so tiny and it has started beating already!

[Scooter]

Caroline, from what I've seen around here, u/s dating irregularities are very common! And there's a 2 or 3 day error margin, so you're not too much out of that range. I'm part of the TP checkers club, I'm still doing it at 13wks! I don't know, maybe all those years of charting have made me a little OCD about looking for CM. ;) I did have a few days of EWCM in week 11, which kind of freaked me out, but I decided it was just hormone changes.

Jrsygirl, that's great news they found out what was causing the bleeding, and it's ok! How cool you got a long u/s, that must have been wonderful to see!

Jad, At 6w3d I had my 1st u/s (and measured right on time). We saw a big black area with a white ring around it (the sac) that looked like a follicle. We zoomed WAY in and there was a part of the edge that looked a little thicker, and that was the yoke sac. On top of that was a tiny thing that looked like a jellybean, but much smaller than the yoke sac. And that jellybean was the baby! And then a portion of the jellybean was flickering, which was the hearbeat. So at first glance it looked a lot like a follicle scan, to me, and I'm sure a week earlier the jellybean wouldn't have even been visible.

Kimmie, that's what we thought about our last u/s, too--they're starting to look like actual babies by now! So exciting to see that!

Amy, shakes sound good--in theory. I think I've got to build up my tolerance for rich food first. And for the first time in my life, pumpkin doesn't sound too good. :( Can't wait to start making up for lost eating time.

You know what's funny, both times I've gone in to my ob's office I've been told "I bet you'd like to find out your due date! Well here it is..." and I keep thinking that I KNOW my chart says we conceived with injectibles and an IUI, do they really think I've gotten this far and wouldn't have a due date? And in my prenatal class last week I had to fill out the birht control section, I was almost laughing. "Were you on BC when you got pregnant?" :rolleyes: I guess that is a common problem, to have been put on the quesitonare. And "Will you go on BC after delivering?" Ha, what a waste of money.

[angelgirl8]

jad...i know i responded in your LJ, but i wanted to drop this off: it's the u/s from my 6w4d appointment. still just a smudge a full week after my first u/s! and we could see even less the first time around.

of course, ignore the fact that there are 2 sacs!

http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b5d800b3127cce923c61d872b000000036108AZNXDhqzbtO

[Amie]

De-lurking (although I should join this group!)

Caroline, I had this same thing happen to me. On my first u/s, the baby measured exactly 7 weeks - which I was. A full week later, the baby measured 7 weeks 3 days. I FREAKED. But the tech told me unless it was 2 full weeks difference, it really didn't matter. And the measurements they are taking are sooooooo tiny. Try not to worry! (I know, harder said than done).

[Jad]

Thank you all *so* much. I feel infinitely better than I did on Friday. I'm trying to do the day at a time thing. Which is easier said than done. Tonight, at least, I have my first solo PIO to take my attention off of everything else. :rolleyes: Hopefully, the 1st will be here before I know it.

[Bernie]

Jad - how did the PIO go? I had to do them myself several times, and I found that the idea of doing it was so much scarier than the actual doing. Hope it turned out okay!

And hope everyone else in here is doing well!

[Jad]

Bernie - Thanks for asking! The right-side shot went really well (once I got over the initial nerves, of course.) The left-side shot wasn't *awful* but it wasn't as good as the first one. Hadn't occured to me that I'd have to alternate. D'oh!

I'm actually really glad I was out of town for a couple of days. Now Tuesday is that much closer!

[bottleored]

Happy Friday!

Sometimes too much information is a bad thing. The last time I went to my RE, I asked if I needed to call in for my b/w each time - because I feared I would get freaked out if things weren't perfect and worry for nothing. So of course, that fear came true this week. I had b/w on Monday afternoon, called Tuesday and could tell I was getting the run around ('they're still putting the info in the books, your results aren't in yet ... etc'). Finally the PA came on and said that my RE hadn't reviewed the results yet, but that they were not as high as they should have been (went from about 36,000 to 39,000 in 3 days - doubling every 608 hours). So of course I freaked. She called me back after he had reviewed everything and said he wasn't concerned because we saw a good h/b last week. I know your hCG levels 'level off' after 8-10 weeks, but I was only 7w. So I worried myself to death for 2 days until my u/s yesterday, where I broke down even before she started :(

Turns out everything is great. Heartbeat was 162, baby measuring 7w5d, 14.5 mm. So, 13 days worth of growth in 6 days. You all were right about not putting stock in the initial measurements. I'm going to stick with my FF date of 6/12/06.

My mantra is now 'I will not Google the word miscarriage. I will not Google the word miscarriage'.

jrsygirl wow! 2 hour u/s? I can understand why you'd get antsy or nauseous laying down for that long!

amygrrl Malin Elizabeth - I love it!

amie join girl, join!

Hope everyone has a nice weekend!

[Amie]

Caroline!!!! Woohoo! THat is *so* awesome! I hate when you (meaning all of us) have to worry for nothing!

***

Maybe I *will* join!

I'm Amie, 26. My DH is Andy, 29. We did fertility treatments (Clomid/IUI/Injectibles/Femara) for over a year and had two early losses. But this past May, I switched RE's and got pregnant and HE stuck! :D

I'm currently 27w4d, but still terrified that something will go wrong. Not in a gripping sort of way like I was the first 5 months, but I still worry. But at the same time, it's really nice to be able to relax more, knowing he could likely survive outside the womb now if he were born.

I love every minute of being pregnant. It's truly the biggest miracle of my entire life. I love the kicks, the hiccups...everything. I can't wait for the day I get to look into my child's eyes and parts of my husband and I looking back at us. It's going to be so awesome.

Sam is due January 23! :D :D :D

[angelgirl8]

caroline...so glad everything turned out okay! all the info we get is so scary. and, of course, as soon as they say anything i go home and google it to death.

amie...welcome!

jad...so glad the shots went well. very impressive!


nothing much doing here...hanging in and waiting for the weeks to pass without incident!

starting to try to get our minds on purchases for the babies and preparing the apt. scary!

[Scooter]

Jad, glad those went well, I can't imagine doing it by myself on the left side--are you right handed?

Caroline, that is wonderful news, I'm so happy for you that this u/s went so much better!

Amie, welcome! Just post your stats (directions are on the 1st page) and I'll add you to the roster. :)

Angel, wow, getting ready for the babies to come, that's so scary and exciting all at once. :eek:


I'm ok, better today. Thurs and Fri were bad for me, just progressively worse and worse, getting dehydrated and when I finally got liquid down, it didn't stay down. Sat I ended up in the ER to get an IV and nausea medication. So at least today I feel like I can function again. I just know that working is what's getting me down, by every Friday I feel horrible. I'm considering cutting down my hours. I just can't keep pushing myself when I feel so awful, you know? I was hoping by now the m/s would be gone and I could go on with my job. :rolleyes:

[Kimmiebride]

bumping us up from page 2...

Scooter, I hope you're feeling better!! That sucks to still be sick. Sending you calm tummy vibes!!!

Amie, welcome!!

Caroline!!! So glad to hear all is well!!!

I am finally over my killer cold, and am having to get back to work so my clients don't kill me. It's so hard, since my bed is just in the next room and is soooooo tempting. I make deals with myself now... just finish editing this wedding and you can go lay down for an hour. I am almost finished with this years' weddings and really want everyone to have their stuff as soon as possible. The holidays are typically really busy with orders, and I have someone lined up to come work for me so it should go well!
Take care ladies!!
Kimmie

[amygrrl]

hey mamas... how are things going? can't believe we are only 3 weeks away from the 1/2 way point. when did things start to fly like this? malin is doing well... still at the dr every week or so, but it's reassuring. had 2+ weeks off of the puking and stupidly thought i was in the clear... have now puked twice in the last 3 days. ok though cause it earns me lots of sympathy points with dh. starting to feel the pre-flutter feelings of movement. can't wait until the really moving starts. nothing else here... 3 weeks until the BIG u/s and we confirm that the early test was right and that she's a she.

----------------
Kimmiebride - yeah for no cold. how far along are you now?
Scooter - wanna hear something funny? i was looking back at my lj when i was preg with avery and saw a comment from you about how you couldn't believe i was still so sick at 15 wks. how ironic is that? hope you are feeling better soon!
angelgirl8 - saw your pictures in lj. you are looking great!
Amie - welcome!
bottleored - glad to hear you are okay. i know the betas level out and even dip down at a certain point. from here on out, you should just be worrying about those u/s's
Jad - you are super brave to give yourself a shot in your own hiney. no way i could do that. the tummy is easy, but the hiney? besides the obvious muscle pain, i think my arms are too short.

[kischer]

I would loove to join all of you darling pregnant ladies!
(remember me?)

We are optimistically cautious right now...

I think that most of us have heard that before. I took a HPT yesterday (15DPO) and it was faint. So, I immediately called the RE and asked if I could come in for bloodwork. I did, my betas came back at 41 and I have to go back on Monday to see if they are doubling or not.

I went back to the RE this cycle and he started me Femara/Letrazole, whatever. I went in and did the whole dildo cams and found out that I ovulated around CD 18. He started me on the progesterone and we went from there. I hate the suppositories, but you gotta do what you gotta do right. Well, I usually have some sort of symptoms. As some of you know, I have experienced two m/c's . When I didn't feel any symptoms whatsoever, I stopped taking the progesterone. Dumb move, I know. I just kept thinking that if I wasn't pregnant why prolong my period. Just start a new cycle already, ya know?! Well, it generally only takes a couple of days for me to start my period. Four days later, I take a test and it's an Answer and there's two lines. HOLY SHITE!!! Well, that pretty much brings us up to today and the fear that I now have.

I so badly want to be here and be pregnant and DH is very positive, but I am scared. I just don't feel pregnant. that' scares the hell out of me. I have two tests, one HPT and one blood that say it's positive and I am pregnant, but why only 41?! UGH! I hope that I get to stay here with you all. I will post my stats when I know more. Thanks for listening(reading) and having me for now, that is if you will?!

ETA: third times a charm right? Please let third time be a charm, please!

[angelgirl8]

KISCH!!!...i've been trying to track you down (website not working??). i am cautiously excited for you. i'm all teary now (as is DH!) sending all the glue vibes i've got.

amy...almost halfway?! wow! time sure is flying.

scooter, dear...how are we feeling today?

[Scooter]

KISCH! Ok, I'm trying to stay cautiously optimistic for you, but I'm just so excited! Did you do an IUI with the femara? I'll be thinking of you tomorrow for beta #2. I know 41 sounds low for 15dpo, but check out the betabase. It says that the lowest reported beta (http://www.betabase.info/showBasicChart.php?type=Single) for 15dpo was 3, and it resulted in a fetus that went on to have a heartbeat at least a couple weeks later. You've got to be terrified, I know, but I'm really hoping 3rd time is the charm for you!!

Kimmie, glad you're feeling better. I can definitely empathize on dragging yourself through the day. Not easy! That's great you have someone to work with you during the holidays to lighten the load.

Amy, that is so ironic, it makes me want to puke. :P Sorry your m/s came back, I was hoping for you that it wouldn't last so long again.

Angel, I hate to say it, don't want to jinx myself, but the last couple days I've had less intense nausea. Still the gagging & stuff, but I was able to eat more in these last 4 days than I have before, so that is a huge relief. :D How are you doing?

[angelgirl8]

scooter...remind me how many weeks you are? the less intense nausea sounds good. someone told me that m/s tends to get worse right before it gets better!

things are good here...mostly just uncomfortable from the weight of this giant belly. some nausea returning but nothing too bad.

we're actually managing to get some registering done for these babies so i'm less panicked about logistics/stuff. i'm sure the panic will return!

[Scooter]

Angel, I'm 15w1d. I was actually feeling good enough to go check out a baby store today, so we can start thinking about what we need or want for the future. It was the first time I was able to start considering what we'll be buying, so I thought that was a good sign, too. Of course, I was the only one looking through the furniture who didn't look pregnant, but hopefully I'll be able to continue getting some food in me. That's good news, maybe last week was things getting worse, so now they can get better. :)

[Kimmiebride]

Hi ladies,
Kischer, hoping the best for you!!!

I am 15w6d today! Big u/s in two weeks!! Feeling little wiggles every once and a while. Finally getting enough energy to do some cleaning around this place, inspired by my ever patient DH who has been putting up with the mess since the beginning... How did I ever get so lucky!

Scooter, hope you are feeling better each day!

Angel, hi to you and the twins!

Amygrrl, so amazing to be almost half way there! Glad Malin is doing great!!

So glad to have you guys here!!
Kimmie

[kischer]

Just thought that I might officially join...

kischer: kisch: ME 31
DH: sway: DH 31
TTC since: May 2002
TTC issues: unexplained infertility
stopped going to the RE 4/05, started acupuncture and TCM only, went back to RE 10/05 femara/letrazole
BFP: 11/4/05
Due Date: 7/10/05

I went to the RE this morning to give more blood. The nurse (my favorite one) says to me, I really wanted higher #'s from you. I said, yeah, me too. She says, maybe we will be surprised. I said, yeah, hopefully we'll be surprised. Then we both say, yeah, we'll be surprised! And laughed. I call to get the results and she answers the phone, Thank goodness. She says, We were wrong. No! We were right! No!
I'm like which one is it? You sound excited, is it good!
Yes, we got our surprise! (I started crying immediately)
She goes one to tell me that she doesn't know the #'s but it looks good. I told her that I needed to know the #'s and could she find out for me. Well, it turns out they jumped to 343! I'm very excited, still very nervous, but this is a great first step. I love that I get to share this with all of you ladies especially my friends. Thanks for the support and well wishes, angelgirliegirl, scooter, and Kimmie!

[jrsygirl]

congrats on the #'s jump Kischer!

[bottleored]

Kisch the warmest welcome ever!! Thinking very sticky vibes for you! Great betas!!

Amie welcome and congrats on Sam!

Scooter so glad you're feeling better. Are you on meds now?

My m/s has me struggling. Just in the last week things have started to not agree with me and I've 'tossed' a few meals. Generally I feel better after, so I think it must be some combo of foods that aren't agreeing with me. Wish it would subside. It's such a drain - I feel like a complete waste at work and at home :(

Picked up a few maternity items yesterday. Didn't try anything on because I felt like crap. I'm realizing I may have to do preliminary maternity shopping during the peak holiday season. I should be able to make it past Thanksgiving - given the bulk I'm already carrying around :rolleyes:

[angelgirl8]

kisch!...what wonderful numbers!

love it!


had a growth scan today on the babies...all is looking good. baby B is measuring about a week behind, which worries me but doesn't seem to worry the doctors. glucose test next week!

[kischer]

Thank you all I'm so excited to be here! Did anyone feel gas pains in the beginning? At least that's what I think they are...kinda feel better after I "let it out", if you know what I mean.
Caroline-how are you feeling cutie?! We are only a month apart! :D

angelgirliegirl-How awesome is this!!! Thursday, big day, good luck. Oh, and you have nothing to worry about!

[Jad]

So do you all ever get those days where you just worry? And worry and worry and worry? Well, I'm having one of those today. After a week of convincing myself that the RE was wrong about the monoamniotic diagnosis, now I'm terrified that he's right. After all, we only really saw one yolk sac and, if that's the case, it seems to be a pretty good indicator of bad news. We have two more weeks before we get to see anyone again and I don't even know how I'm going to make it through today. Maybe I just freaked myself out this morning. I woke up thinking I'd be getting my period today -- which would actually be about the right timing if I weren't pregnant. So I'm hoping it's just some sort of weird internal clock, but regardless, I'm a mess.

kischer - Welcome, and yes, gas pains have been pretty common for me. Even woke me up a time or two at night, they were so bad.

[Bernie]

Jad - I think it is a bit better now than it was in the very beginning, but I still pretty much spend a good chunk of every day worrying - so no worries! (Or at least you're not alone in your worrying). I think the only time I am not worrying is when we're looking at them during an u/s and I have visual confirmation that everything is okay in there.

kisher - Congratulations!! I don't think I've really had gas-type pains at all - but I have had a million and one other aches and pains that my OBs keep telling me are perfectly normal.

[Kimmiebride]

So scared today - spent most of it in the ER, but all is well so far. Woke up with a gush of blood followed by a couple more in the next hour. Told DH I wanted to go to the ER. They were great!!! First thing they did a scan to check on the baby, who was kicking away, and wiggling around a lot. I cried with joy at the sight. They kept me for about 5 or 6 hours, did some blood tests and sent me home on modified bedrest for a few days, and pelvic rest. She suspected low lying placenta, and she "angered" it a little more with the vag. u/s and pelvic, but it stopped and just is a little bit now. She was really optimistic that if it is low placenta, it has plenty of time to resolve itself. Hopefully I won't have any repeated episodes of bleeding like that. It was so scary, but through it all I didnt have any pain, so I had hope that we would be ok. I don't think I have prayed that much in a long time!

Jad, hope things are looking up! I think there's just no way we won't worry about these babies...

Kiscsh, gas pains? oh yeah, got em from time to time - sharp little pains. hate it!
Take care ladies!
Kimmie

[jrsygirl]

Ugh Kimmie- I know how scary that is trust me!! Hopefully it all works out as well as mine did! Just relax and get lots of rest with those feet up!!!

[kischer]

Well, no need to add me or my stats to the lineup:(
I went back for betas today and the went down to 100 something. I wish all of you the best of luck and pray that one day I may join this thread and not leave until I give birth to a beautiful healthy baby. love to you all
~kisch~

[angelgirl8]

oh kisch, i am so heartbroken for you. that's really all i can say. please know i'm sending all my love down your way.

[Kimmiebride]

Kisch, that's such sad news. We're thinking of you, and hope you heal and that you can come back soon.
Kimmie

[Ole Miss Bride]

Oh, Kisch, I'm so, so sorry. So sorry.

Love,
Betsy

[Jad]

Ack! I ran out of PIO last night! I used to have one more vial, but it looks like the horomones that create preggo brain are in full swing. Best as I can figure it, when I switched to this vial, instead of throwing out the old, empty vial, I threw out the final, unused, full vial. So when I went to pull out the full one last night, I was startled to find the empty vial in it's place. D'oh!

I have a call into my RE to find out if I need to scramble for more. He originally said to take the PIO until 9 weeks. Which is today. But what does that mean exactly? That I need one tonight? That I should take them *through* the 9th week (i.e. until next Monday?) I know a friend who stopped at 8w4d, so I'm hoping that a final shot on 8w6d will be ok.

Did I already say "Ack!"?


kischer - I'm so sorry.

[bottleored]

kischer {{{HUGS}}} I'm so sorry you're going through this again! Take good care of yourself and your DH!


kimmie what a scare! Glad everything worked itself out.

I think I'm on the upswing of the first trimester. Had a rotton week last week, then started feeling better on Thursday. Of course, that makes me paranoid :rolleyes: I have my last RE appointment tomorrow, then it's off to my OB after Thanksgiving. It's going to be a hard transition. I've been going to my RE for almost a year now and to only have appointments every month is going to be an adjustment.

We told my parents a few weeks back and my siblings, etc last weekend. 2 of my SILs were absolutely teary-eyed. Everyone is so excited. We'll tell DH's family on T'giving, then the rest of the world.

Hope everyone is doing well!

[Kimmiebride]

I am off to my follow up appt for the bleeding, which has stopped. I am hoping they lift my activity restrictions. I thought laying around would be nice, but only for a couple of days. I'll post later with the news.

I am having a tough time in the April thread. Everyone is having their level II's and it's all chatter about the sex of the baby, and how it's more real once you know. Um... not for all of us. We aren't finding out, and we're totally thrilled with our decision to be surprised. This pregnancy is real as can be, and I feel like I am dealing with more "real" stuff these days, ending up in the ER, bleeding like crazy, and being worried about more stuff than double strollers. I don't mean to minimize their experiences at all - it's just really hard for ME to relate to these days. I find much more kindred spirit in here, even though we're all at different stages. Sorry to vent...

Caroline - 10 weeks+ already!! That's so great. Glad you are feeling well! How fun to share the news!!

Jad, of course you're checking with the doctor, but I think you'll be ok... my doc said the placenta takes over at around 8 weeks or so. I was on the suppositories until a couple of weeks after that, mainly just to use them up, and have some peace of mind. Not sure if your protocol varies a great deal, but hope you have an answer quickly and all is well!

Jrsy, thanks for the well wishes. When I read about your episode I thought, "Oh my God, that's so scary..." and when it happened to me, it was!
I am so glad that all is well with the kiddos!

Angelgirl8, how are you doing? Time is going by so fast!!

Bernie, hope you're worrying less... I know it's not likely that any of us will have many completely worry-free days...

Take care all!
Kimmie

[Amie]

Kischer - I'm so very sorry:(

[Scooter]

Oh no, Kisch! I am so so sorry, just heartbroken for you. Take care of yourself, I'll be thinking of you.

[jrsygirl]

kischer I am so sorry to hear your news :(

Kimmie I can comletely relate to your feelings about the April thread. I am so scared every single day of this pregnancy- and knowing that we are no where near a safe delivery date makes me insane.
I'm trying not to be obsessive about it but its hard. every week that passes is a sigh of relief -and every two weeks is like a rollercoaster with all the US the worry leading up to them and then the relief when everything is fine with them both..
Someone had commented how lucky I was that I get US every two weeks. Yeah, I guess they can feel that way because they are not constantly worried about a MC . I wish I had a normal pregnancy and didn't know what it was like to be constantly afraid and worry everytime I go to the Dr.
Everytime we think about buying something I feel like I might be cursing myself.

anyway, Just wanted to let you know you're not alone! I hope everything goes fine at the Dr today.!!!

[amygrrl]

Kisch - i'm so so sorry....

[Kimmiebride]

Just stopping in to say that my appointment went well, and things seem to be ok for now. She did say that with all the risk factors I am probably looking at a pre-term delivery, which scared the crap out of me. We'll know more after my Level II on Monday. She said it didn't look like my placenta was too low, which then leaves no explanation of the bleeding. Now I am having to re-think the wedding I have to photograph in Hawaii in January as well as going to Florida for the holidays... So much for not being stressed... Still on modified bed rest until my next appt on 12/2 with my regular doc. Hoping for the best as always.

Jrsygirl, thanks so much for your note! I am glad to know that I am not just being crazy or hormonal!

Take care ladies!
Kimmie

[angelgirl8]

kimmie...so sorry you have to wait longer. good job with the resting, though! feel good.

[jrsygirl]

Kimmie- Just wanted to say that on my regular US they weren't able to find the source or reason for the bleeding either. When I had my level 2 they found 2 hematomas that had been bleeding. They were above the babies so when the babies had shifted the bleeding started. Once I passed them the bleeding stopped and I haven't had any again.

Hope the level II will shed some light..In the mean time keep on relaxing!
A friend of mine is 22 weeks with twins and has bled/ spotted every single day and has been on bed rest for weeks already.

[bottleored]

Well, I'm officially 'graduated' from my RE. What an emotional day. I started tearing up in his office as he thanked me for being a good patient and following all of the 'crazy' things he'd ask me to do. I thanked him and he said 'what did I do? I wrote on a bunch of charts. You did all the hard work'. It was such a validation for me. Then as we were leaving his office, he announced to the staff in the back office 'we have a graduation!'. Everyone clapped and I cried and hugged everyone. I've got tears in my eyes thinking about it. He made me promise to keep in touch - that I was part of the family.

kimmie glad your appointment went well, but sorry you're still on bed rest. I know that as luxurious as it sounds to the average person, but I know I'd be going stir crazy. Also, it gives all the more time to worry. BTW - I'm with you on not wanting to know the sex!

identifying with other 'group' mommies I totally feel that. Participating in discussions about the positive/uplifting things I really want to focus on (buying maternity clothes, decorating the nursery, etc) is sometimes very helpful. On the other hand, I don't feel like I'm being totally honest when I reply to stuff because I don't want to bring the thread down. There are a few women who have had m/c and IF, so I know I'm not totally alone. I know that you all can understand my feelings about leaving my RE, but it's not something I would think of sharing in a 'monthly group'.

[jrsygirl]

bottleored OMG that is so sweet of your RE. That is really nice of him!!

[Kimmiebride]

Caroline, Congrats on your graduation! Bittersweet... When I left mine, it was tough - they were such a part of my team, and even though we got pregnant on a break, I really give a lot of credit to them because they gave us hope. That means the world in this crazy struggle!!

Everybody, thanks again for your words of encouragement! time to lie back down!
Kimmie

[Scooter]

Kimmie, I'm so sorry you're still on bedrest and have no real answers yet. Hey, my level II is exactly a week after yours! I hope you get some good news and answers on Monday. I'm just like you, I'm not finding out the sex, either. Our focus is on a healthy baby, not on whether we can buy blue or pink stuff. ;) (I hope that didn't sound offensive to anyone.)

the group threads: I'm definitely with you guys on this one. I haven't even participated in the April one since the 1st trimester thread. I just don't feel like joining in on most of the discussions. It either feels like they're talking about things I'm not ready for yet, or they're just so SURE everything is going to be great, and unfortunately I can't look that far into the future or let go of some (realisitc!) fears. It's like Caroline said, I don't want to bring the thread down. And even on QOTDs I feel like I'm just out of the loop or would have a negative response. It's much more comfortable here to me. :)

Caroline, that is such a great way to leave the RE's office. Your RE sounds wonderful, no wonder you don't want to leave him! I can understand, because when I left mine she told me that until I was established at an OB to call her right away if I was worried about anything, because they'd get me in for an u/s & appt immediately and the OB would take longer. It's so nice to feel like you have people supporting you, not just because you're one of all the pregnant patients but knowing you and your story and what you've been through. :( Bittersweet. I hope you like your OB, though.

[Jad]

I've gotta say, I'm a little jealous of you all who had such supportive REs. I'm going to be so glad to be rid of mine because he's been nothing but discouraging at pretty much every turn. :(

Quick question. Has anyone ever had dreams that have really frightened you regarding the pregnancy? I had this horrible dream last night where I was a bodyguard for someone and they ended up dying. I work up and was just terrified that it meant something bad about the babies. Lousy way to wake up, that is!

[Bernie]

Jad - I've had vivid, disturbing dreams almost every night of this pregnancy. Some are about the babies (where bad things happen) and some are just disturbing, but have nothing to do with the babies. And every once in awhile, there has been a nice dream. Last week, I had one where the babies were born and everything was ok.

I hear you all on the monthly group threads. I felt very weird about posting there in my first trimester. I feel much more comfortable there now. I'm not sure why - it could be that the further along we are, the more similar the experience is - or it could be because many of the women in there seem to have also had ups and downs during their pregnancies (spotting, etc.) - or maybe a combination of the two?

Kimmie - I hope all goes well for you on Monday!

And I hope everyone else is feeling good!

[Kimmiebride]

Jad, my first RE was a total jerk, so after a brief period of feeling lost and hopeless, we found another one, and she was great. I just wasn't putting up with someone telling me there was no way I'd get pregnant because I was too fat and too old. Didn't want to even try any injectibles or other protocols, since he had a hard time finding one of my ovaries with the u/s, and said he was so good with the u/s that if he couldn't find it, no one could. funny because my other RE's office never had any trouble. Hope you are liberated soon, and you love your OB!!! I had the scariest dream a couple of months into the pregnancy, and I actually woke up screaming my head off. That has never happened before. The dream was there was a scorpion was on me, and I knew it would kill my unborn child, and no one would help me. It's the only one I have had that was bad about a baby... the rest are sweet baby dreams. I try not to read too much into things... there's enough that we worry about anyway.
Kimmie
Kimmie

[jrsygirl]

How do you all know or know when to differentiate when you have normal pregnancy achiness and growing pains vs. ones that indicate something is wrong..??
I feel like every little thing makes me want to call the Dr office- which I know is fine especially since I have a high risk pregnancy.. but I really want to try and remain positive and not be freaking out over every little thing..

[Scooter]

That's a great question. I'm kind of going on the idea that if it's not really painful then it's one of those normal feelings. But every single time I get any cramps my first thought is immediately, "Oh no, it's over, this is it, I'm losing the baby." And I have to always tell myself, "No, don't be silly, little cramps and twinges are normal." I have to repeat that about twenty times to myself to calm down again, but it's like 17weeks into this I still can't believe it's really happening and I might actually have a baby.

I think if I'd been categorized as high risk I'd be doing the same thing, thinking about or actually calling the Dr all the time! If you do, it's worth the peace of mind, that's why they get paid. Don't feel bad about it. But I definitely get that it's hard to always be positive. Maybe it's because, after infertility, we've had so much bad news it's just how we've learned to protect ourselves.

[Kimmiebride]

Hi everyone,
I have been numb the past couple of days, and wanting to post, but not wanting to bring people down, but wanting support and prayers. I am just gonna get it out there so no one wonders where I disappeared to.

We got some really tough news at our level II on Monday. Our baby has bi-lateral club feet, which by itself is not a really big deal, but at our age, with our increased risk for genetic or chromosomal abnormalities it is a bad sign. We also found out that my chorio and amniotic membranes remain unfused on the right side, which are normally fused by 16 weeks. The may explain the bleeding episode I had on the 13th. Unfortunately, these two things together are a really bad sign, especially for trisomy 13 & 18. We had an amnio yesterday, and are waiting for the results. I try to remain positive, but it's really, really hard. We are so grateful for every minute of this pregnancy. We have to wait and see, and the most frustrating part is that if the amnio is normal, we're still not out of the woods. It could still be a sign of a really bad neurological disorder or something else that they just can't test for. Double whammy, since you normally hope for a normal amnio and you're in the clear. The genetics counselors were not very hopeful for a positive outcome regardless of the results. It hit us like a ton of bricks, as we weren't even expecting anything like this so late in the game. I go from feeling numb to uncontrolled sobbing to brief moments of clarity. We still don't know, but the only conclusive results would be bad ones - the trisomys.

Thanks to everyone for all your support these past few months! It's been great to share this adventure with you, and I know that you all will be even more thankful tomorrow for your little bundles than you are today! Wishing you all good things in your lives and your pregnancies. If I have anything to update, I will. We'll get through this, but it will be rough for the foreseeable future.
Kimmie

[RileyMom]

I've just been surfing around CC, and saw Kimmiebride's post. I hope no one minds if I come in for a minute.

Kimmiebride I can't seem to find the right words here. I have tears in my eyes -- my heart is broken for you. I wish there was something I could do to make this all go away. I am saying a prayer for you and your DH right now. :( Please take care of yourself.

Sheryl

[jennylou]

delurking to say:

I am so sorry to hear your news, kimmie. You are in my thoughts (and prayers to if you want them). My best to you in this tough, tough time.

[Scooter]

Kimmie, my god I am so sorry. My DH & I both read your post, and we send you our heartfelt hugs. I can't imagine the sorrow & pain you and your DH must be going through. I know it may be painful to read posts here or come back here, but I hope that if you need support you come back anyway. My thoughts are with you as you deal with this and wait for the amnio results.

[Bernie]

kimmie - I am so sorry. You and your DH and your little one will definitely be in my thoughts - and we're here if you need us. (And please do not apologize or think that you are bringing this thread down - that's what we're here for).

[Astro]

Kimmie I am so very sorry to hear about what you and your DH are going through. Whenever something happens late in the game, it really really sucks. I'm glad you and your DH are grateful for every minute of your pregnancy. I'll keep the 3 of you in my thoughts and prayers. If you need anything or need to scream, feel free to private message me. Unfortunatley, I understand some of what you're going through since I too experienced something happening late in the game.

[angelgirl8]

kimmie...i'm so sorry to hear your news. i'll be keeping you and your family in my thoughts.

[bottleored]

kimmie there are no words. Lots of prayers.

[Jad]

kimmie - I'm sorry for the stressful news. This has been such a long road for all us and you didn't deserve to have yet another bump in yours. We'll absolutely keep you in our prayers. And please never hesitate to share anything about how you're feeling.

[melissafromnc]

delurking as well--Oh, kimmie, my heard is just breaking for you. I'll be thinking the best thoughts for the three of you. I hope you get your amnio results back quickly and are trying to take care of yourself during this incredibly stressful time.

[amygrrl]

kimmie - i am so very sory that you are having to go through so much pain and uncertainty. please let me know if you need anything at all.

[AusMarchBride]

Kimmiebride I'm so sorry about your news. You and your DH and baby are in my prayers

[pocket]

oh kimmiebride, that's such hard news.:(

[Bastille]

Kimmie-

I am in shock, anger and sadness as I read your news. Shock and anger because this just should NOT be happening. Having a baby should NOT be this difficult and laden with pain. Why is it so difficult for so many of us? Isn't planning a family supposed to be a joyful thing and not such an unpaved road with such large pitfalls? I have been through the joy of being pregnant and the pain of loss(es) as many others on this thread, I can only pray and have Faith that God may Bless us all with children.

I am so sad that you have to go through this.

Please let me know if there is anything I can do. In the meantime you are in my prayers and I am sending you hugs.

Christina

[jrsygirl]

Kimmie- I am so sorry to hear your news..I don't even know what to say except that we will keep you, your husband and your baby in our prayers. Please let us know if there is anything that we can do to support you as you face this.

[Kimmiebride]

Hi everyone,
Seeing your messages of support really means the world to me. I wanted to let you all know that we lost our little baby boy very early in the morning on Thanksgiving. Of course there are not words for situations like this, and I know that those of you who have experienced it know a bit about how we feel right now. The prayers and support just lifted up his little spirit, and that is very comforting. Anyway, I'll be back to check in on you, and thanks again for being there for me. It is really a precious gift.
Kimmie

[Ole Miss Bride]

Oh, God, Kimmie. I'm so sorry. There are no words to tell you how sorry I am.

-Betsy

[malala]

I'm very sorry for your loss, and I'll be thinking of you and your DH.

[Fireside Girl]

Kimmie,
I am so sorry for your loss. I know how much you wanted this baby. It isn't really fair.

[Suzlywoozly]

Oh Kimmie! I am so sorry! You and your family are in my prayers.

[Bastille]

Kimmie - I am so sorry for your loss.

Holding a grief ceremony is something I really recommend in helping to deal with a loss. Last year when we lost "Bruiser" DH and I went to the Ritz Carlton in Half Moon Bay at sunset, listened to the Bagpipes (which happen everyday at sunset), said some prayers and let a balloon go - it was a beautiful experience and helped DH and I grieve and cry together about our loss - we watched the balloon rise into the sky and all of a suffen the balloon was surrounded by a couple of birds as it flew away in the distance, it was actually beautiful and a nice memory.

When you are ready there are also some good books about loss, Silent Sorrow is one and Unspeakable Losses is another.

Hugs & Prayers
Christina

[melissafromnc]

Kimmie--I'm so very, very sorry for your loss. It really is so very unfair. E and I are both thinking of you and sending you guys love.

[Amie]

Oh, Kimmie. I cannot imagine what you are going through. I am so very sorry for your loss.

[Bernie]

Kimmie - I am so very sorry for your loss.

[Scooter]

Oh Kimmie, I'm so sorry for the loss of your son. My heart just breaks for you. It's just not fair that you've had to go through so much to get here and now this. Take good care of yourself, you & your DH & son are all in my thoughts.

[Kimmiebride]

Hi everyone,
All of your notes are so comforting. Thanks for taking the time to write. I am hanging in there, and all the love coming at us is really helping us weather the storm so far.
again, thanks...
Kimmie & DH & DS

[kmmommy]

Kimmie - I'm so sorry for your loss. I will keep your family in my prayers.

[strwbrygirl]

kimmie- I'm so sorry for your loss- your family will be in our prayers.

[jrsygirl]

oh god Kimmie, I don't even know what to say, i am so sorry, please know that our thoughts and prayers are with you, your DH and sweet DS.
sometimes life is so unfair.

[angelgirl8]

kimmie...i am so so sorry for your loss. there are no words. i'm keeping your family in my thoughts.

[bottleored]

kimmie more {{HUGS}}. I am so sorry.

[jrsygirl]

Hi all, glad everyone had good Thanksgivings..

I had another US yesterday.. Our little boy looks perfect!

Our little girl showed two soft markers..one with calcification around the heart, (which in some research I've read online isn't even always considered a soft marker any longer) and another in her stomach. The one in the stomach may just be ingested blood.

Unfortunately because I could not have the AFP we don't have the results to look back on for elevated risk levels. The next step would be an amnio. That in iteslf poses a lot of questions aside from the normal increased risks because we would have to worry about the risk to our little boy.


is it so wrong to just want a boring pregnancy after everything I've been through?

Anyway- I spoke with our genetic counselor this morning that we had a relationship with from earlier in the pregnancy. She answered a lot of my questions and calmed a lot of my fears which centered around "What if we have the amnio done only to find out everything was fine and in the process something happens to not only the little girl but our son too?" Of course there are no guarantees but she said that was highly unlikely and in all their years of dealing with multiples she has never seen it happen.

i think we're going to think it over some more but I think we're leaning towards doing it even if its just about peace of mind. We've only known for 24 hours and I'm a wreck. I was upset last night but woke up today and cried for an hour before i got out of bed. then after talking to the counselor this morning I started crying at work which I really hate!! I just can't imagine dealing with the "what if" for another 3-4 mos. Especially since my PG is already high risk and I'm supposed to be relaxing!

So if we do it they will do it either this Thursday or next Tuesday - the sooner the better in my mind. Its also somewhat comforting that the specialist that did we met with earlier in the pg has agreed to do the amnio for us. At least we know he's the best and will give is better odds just because of his expertise. I'll keep you all updated but in the meantime if you could send positive vibes my way I'd really appreciate it!

[jrsygirl]

Oh- and the Dr wants me to start progesterone now too..oh- joy..more injections! I don't even know how they could phase me at this point...
has anyone taken them late in their pregnancy? I was on Prometrium in the first tri but these would be shots in the butt! Ouch!!

[jennylou]

Oh, mrs scooter - would you mind adding me to the roster?

jennylou
Me: 26
DH: 36
TTC: July 2005
5th cycle of clomid, 100 mg pregnant 11/05!
DS: Andrew Wyatt 5/20-5/22/05, also a clomid baby
PCOS

[Bernie]

Congratulations Jennylou! Wishing you a very happy & healthy 9 months!

We had another ultrasound today to check on everyone. Baby A is just over 2 pounds, and Baby B is just shy of 2 pounds - and everything looked good, which was nice to see. And my cervix is still long and closed, which was also good to hear. Crazy to think I'll be in my 3rd trimester by my next ultrasound!

jrsygirl - are you doing the progesterone in oil shots? I had to do them for the first 6 weeks or so of pregnancy. I can't say it was a fun experience, but honestly, it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Not sure what you decided to do about the amnio - but good luck with whatever you decide to do!

Hope everyone else in here is doing well!

[angelgirl8]

just checking in...

jennnylou...it makes me unbelievably happy to say "welcome"!


things are okay here. big, uncomfortable, anxious. at my OB appt on monday the doctor said i was slightly dilated and i need to watch closer for pre-term labor.

also, both babies are breech right now, so we're looking at a c-section. ack!

we have a growth scan on the babies this coming tuesday so we'll know how much they weigh (approximately) then!

[bottleored]

jrsygirl hope your amnio went well if you were able to schedule it today.

jennylou warm welcome!! So glad to see you in here!

Things are going well for us. I had my first OB appointment on Tuesday. She did an incredibly quick u/s just to measure. It was internal (no sound :mad: ). She went through so fast we forgot to ask her if we could listen on the doppler. She's pretty no-nonsense. They had really squeezed me in for the appointment, so I can't blame her too much. I have my nuchal screening tomorrow. I'm sure the perinatologist will take his time. It's hard to believe my next regular OB appointment will be after Christmas!

We also just started telling people (friends, co-workers). It's been lots of fun. Several friends are offering maternity wear (much of which may not fit, but it's worth a shot).

Hope everyone is doing well!

[jrsygirl]

Just wanted to come by and update everyone on my day..

Got up super early and opted to drive into the city in case I was feeling crappy after and wouldn't want to be on a train.. We got to Columbia right on time and as usual the staff was super amazing (ya'll I WISH they could deliver my babies!! but because of distance and the fact that he doesn't do delivery anymore I guess I'll just have to be satisfied with the fact that when I need them they are there!!).

We sat down with the Dr right away and he told us he looked at the scans from Monday and he's not worried. He did see what they saw but that it is a small chance that the stomach might be something. For peace of mind we all decided to do the amnio ( i am obsessive and would spend the next half of my pregnancy worried) .

Anyway- we signed all the forms, they did another ultrasound of both babies to be doubly sure..The ultrasound looked good, the heart focus was still noticeable but he was quick to point out that 5% of all healthy babies have a cardiac focus. The stomach one also didn't look as bad. He said the rule of thumb for them is that if the spots are brighter than bone you worry. Hers aren't..but they are close.

Anyway halfway through the scan as they are prepping for the amnio the dr's like " I changed my mind".

umm??hello?

he decided since the baby's placenta was anterior (meaning on her the layers went stomach, placenta, sac where as our boy is opposite: stomach, sac and his placenta is attached behind him) the dr would hit the placenta before the sac He decided he wanted to minimize the risk to the baby and do a CVS- which tests the placenta tissue instead. They also noticed that my amniotic fluid around her is murky and wasn't sure if I had an infection or not.

DH and I were like: OK, you're the expert..if thats what you think, thats what we'll do!

I still got a big ol' needle in my belly but at least I have the reassurance of knowing the risk to the baby was minimized because they never touched the sac. The other plus is that the results come back way faster. The amnio would have taken almost two weeks. This way I should know by Tuesday at the latest. They also drew blood from me to see if I do in fact have an infection or if the murkiness in the amniotic fluid was just from the two hematomas and bleeding I had on that side back around 13/ 14 weeks.

Over all it wasn't bad at all..I have a bit of discomfort and some soreness. I'm just glad its over and now nervously awaiting the call on Monday/ Tuesday. DH of course was amazing and held my hand and took care of me all dy at home.

Please keep your fingers crossed for us that she is healthy!!

[jrsygirl]

jennylou welcome!! So glad to see you join us!!!

Bernie yes they are the oil ones. I haven't started them yet because we are still waiting for insurance approval which is strange because my insurance is excellent and they haven't given us any problems so far. The dr. warned me they were more painful, but at this point I've been through so much..whats another few shots??

bottleored Thank you!!!
Sorry that they rushed you through your US. I'm sure you'll see much more with the peri today! Mine has a much better machine than my OBGYN office so I like getting them done there better anyway!

[Kimmiebride]

Jrsygirl, here's hoping and praying your girl is healthy, and extra prayers for your boy too. I am glad you will have results faster than the amnio. The waiting is just so hard.

************************************************** *****

We go for my first doctor appointment since we lost the baby today. I can't believe it is already more than a week since we lost him. Time has a lot of nerve, just marching on like that. The past few days have been much harder than the first ones - the post partum hormones are really terrible, and I just cry all the time now. Ray is back to work, which is good for him, but I get so lonely now, since it used to be me and my little belly buddy, and now it's just me and I feel so empty. I have also had some wicked anxiety attacks where I am sure I am going to die too, and leave Ray all alone. Not fun. I am asking about some drugs if that continues.... the sadness I can bear, the anxiety is crippling.

Thanks again for everyone's continued notes and stuff... I am glad I have you guys, and look forward to the future months where we might try again to be here with another pregnancy. It's hard to even think about right now, but hopefully we won't have the infertility to contend with now that we have been pregnant, but I also have lost my last bit of innocence when it comes to having a baby, and will most likely be terrified the whole time. When I read about people who have had more than one second or third trimester loss, I feel like throwing up, and don't know how I could possibly go through this again. I guess that's what the healing time is for. I am trying not to think about that, and just take one moment at a time...
Kimmie

[angelgirl8]

kimmie...i wish i knew what to say to make things all better. please know that i'm thinking you and your husband all the time.

[Scooter]

How did I miss so much of the thread?

Things are going pretty ok for me. I'm going to be 20w tomorrow, and I am so excited to reach that milestone. Of course now I've moved on to worrying about early labor. I've finally started to show enough that everyone is in agreement about it :rolleyes: and now I'm really needing more maternity clothes. We had our level II last week and heard back from the OB that the measurements are all great. We never did any blood tests besides checking for CF, and that was negative, so we're really hoping that these results all mean everything is ok at this point. I also met with my new midwife this week, which went really well. I've had a lot of anxiety about this last 1/2 of the pregnancy, so I've had a lot of dreams about the baby dying or giving birth too early, etc etc. I know anxiety isn't good for the baby but sometimes you just can't shake that fear.




Jenny, A big WELCOME to you! I've (finally) added you to the roster. :) Do you have an EDD? I know you must, you're a charter.

Caroline, I know this reply is way late, but even if the Dr had listened on the doppler at your appt you wouldn't have been able to hear the heartbeat. I can't remember exactly when the doppler can pick it up, somewhere aroun 10-12 weeks I think is the usual span of time. The only way to hear the heartbeat before that, as far as I know, is if the u/s machine has sound capability.

jrsygirl, your doctor sounds so careful, it must take off some of the stress about it knowing that he's doing everything he can to make sure the babies are ok & stay ok. :) Do you have any resutls back yet? Thinking healthy thoughts for your two little ones.

Kimmie, I'm glad you're stopping in here, and one day I hope you come join us again, too. There are a lot of great grief centers out there that you may at some point feel like looking into, if only to make the loneliness and pain somewhat more bearable. I hope the anxiety attacks are getting better, those are so hard. You've been on my mind, I hope you both continue to take care of yourselves.

[jennylou]

scooter - thanks for adding me. My EDD is Aug 6 (by LMP, which is what I know my OB will use). I'm sorry that you are having such horrible dreams. They suck.

jrsygirl - thanks for the welcome! Have you heard any thing more on your tests?

[MSH]

Mrs scooter I would like to join also, pretty please

Me: 24
DH 24
TTC since: 2003
TTC issues: Low sperm count (DH had surgery to correct the issue). 2 m/c's, 1 CP. No other known issues.
Protocol you conceived with: MIRACLE!!!!!!
BFP date: December 7th
Due Date: August 21, 2006

[angelgirl8]

msh...YAY!! congratulations, sweetie! welcome!

[MSH]

Thank you so much!! I cannot believe I missed you are having twins!! Gosh I must go catch up on some journals!

msh...YAY!! congratulations, sweetie! welcome!

[ds2003]

I just found this thread and am joining.

Congrats MSH! I do remember you from the TTC w/ charting threads.


Me: Carla 28
DH': N 32
Children: This will be our first
TTC since: 11/03
TTC issues: PCOS, annovulatory
Conceived with: ovarian drilling, metformin, Femara, IUI
BFP date:10/9/2005
Due date: 6/21/2006