the gym

[catmom]

Last week DH and I joined a gym, and have been loving it. I've only left the babies there once, but they seemed to handle it reasonably well- one of the women working there told me that my DS cried if she put him down, so she just held him the whole time (and I thought it was great that she was willing to do that- thankfully it wasn't very busy). My older DD LOVES the childcare there and asks to go daily. We are planning on doing a kid-centered activity this morning, but she says she wants to go to the gym instead :rolleyes:. I'm guessing some of the novelty will wear off at some point, but I'm glad she likes it so much.

My girlfriend is aghast, however, because she would never leave her DD (the same age as my twins) with strangers or in a daycare setting, and she has me second-guessing myself. She is afraid her DD will catch something awful at the daycare, or that her DD will be hysterical. And she says that since she is a sahm, it is her job to care for her DD all the time and not leave her in daycare.

Honestly, I am loving the gym and would go every day if I could. I have so much more energy on the days I go and get a swim, and I'm looking forward to trying the yoga and pilates classes there. My DH is having a good time going on the weekends, and he takes my older DD with him (she asks to go) and she gets some playtime with some other kids while the babies are napping. My back and abs have also never been the same since my last pregnancy, so I'm hoping to get my core strength back so I will stop having back pain all the time. I am actually thinking that once my younger 2 drop their morning nap (which will probably be soon now), I will just make the gym a part of our daily routine, something we do for an hour after breakfast. Is this as crazy as my friend thinks it is? This is really the first thing I have done for myself in 4 years, and I'm really enjoying it. Taking care of 3 little kids is fun, but it's also tiring (and frankly, it does get a little monotonous sometimes). Having a little break every day just gives me a little spring in my step.

[Brady]

Not crazy at all... your friend might be a little bit for thinking that. ;) Seriously, some people though are very anti-daycare/babysitters, etc. and to each his own. That said, I love my gym and the childwatch center there. My 4 year old loves going, like your daughter he asks to go even when my husband is home on the weekend so he can play. I started taking my younger son when he was about 5 months old, he's 13 months now and when I peek in the window, he is having a swell time playing with the toys and the providers love him. So, I do not feel guilty at all- they have fun and are interacting with other kids, and as a SAHM it gives me that hour break each day to unwind and work out (and sometimes is the only way I can get a shower in!). I leave feeling better about myself and my kids are well cared for.

[merjmo]

Please don't let your friend project her feelings onto you. If you like this gym (which you are raving about, so don't even second guess yourself there!) then GO! It's good for you, it's good for the kids to be around a couple of other kids even if it's not very long, and it allows you to do one of the most important things in life - EXERCISE!

When I exercise I always remind myself that I'm teaching DD a lesson about how it's an important part of life if you want to be healthy. And I'm excited that she's learning that!

[j*east]

If it works for you, go for it. If it doesn't work for your friend, she doesn't have to do it. The great thing about motherhood is there's not just one good way to do it. :)

(And by the way, I'm envious--my DD does not like the childcare at our Y so far, so I haven't been getting to work out much. Good for you!)

[isign]

Every parent has different needs. I'm a SAHM and have had a hard time leaving DS with anyone except my family, which doesn't happen. Then #2 came a long and I realized I couldn't be a good mom without taking some me time, which you are doing. I envy you :) SIL had a friend with the same, almost paranoid, thoughts as your girlfriend. She wouldn't let her son be in any type of daycare setting and went to the point as a germaphobe to not take him to wal-mart. Guess what happened when she had to go back to work when he was around a year - he caught EVERYTHING and ended up in the hospital. His body couldn't handle it. If I could put myself in your shoes, I'd do the same thing.

[Sevilla]

Your twins are over a year old - they're not newborns! Even if you were putting a young infant in the gym daycare, you're in the same building and you're not leaving them for a long period of time, yk? Your friend sounds like she's overthinking things.

[magrat]

It depends on if you feel it is safe and the kids seem happy. My friend joined a gym and loved it, but the daycare wasn't secure. When she went to collect her DD and saw she could have picked her up and left the building without seeing anyone she decided to cancel her membership. I would sneak back to the daycare periodically and peek in to make sure everything is as the lady said it is. I have nothing against daycare, but the standards may not be as high at a gym as they would be in a regular daycare center.

[catmom]

Thanks, everyone! I feel better about it now. I actually felt more like my friend when my oldest was little... I was very nervous about leaving her anywhere, and never left her with anyone other than a relative until she started preschool. But then, with only one child I didn't need a break so much. Plus, once she started preschool and I realized that she was totally happy playing with the other kids without me, I realized I could have left her a lot earlier and she would have been fine. Epecially since she gave up napping at 20 months- I think I could have spared myself a lot of burnout when she was a toddler.


I would sneak back to the daycare periodically and peek in to make sure everything is as the lady said it is.

This is what I did the first time I left the babies there- I went back twice to check in on them, and they were fine. And I have drilled my DD so she knows that if something is wrong, she is to go to one of the Red Shirt ladies and tell them she wants them to get her mom. The only problem is that I usually swim, so getting out of the pool and running across the building is a little bit impractical ;).

The other nice thing about this gym is that they have structured activities for the kids every morning at 10- tuesdays/thursdays they do arts & crafts, and the other days they have physical activities- parachute play and the like. So it's almost like she gets to be in a gymboree-type class while I exercise.

Anyway, I think I just needed to hear that I'm not the only SAHM who takes advantage of the gym daycare on a regular basis.

[BTB]

Oh my goodness, go, go, GO! You're in the building, you've taking care of of your own health, you're setting a great example for the kids, and it's what, an hour a day? Go for it Mama!

[Wrighty26]

Definitely go! I was hestitant about bringing DS to the gym and didn't start bringing him till he was over a year... and I have NO IDEA why I waited. He loved it and I loved being able to work out and have some quality "me" time.

This time I won't be waiting and will be back at the gym when DD is @ 3 months old.

I agree with BTB - you're setting a great example for your kids!

[Daisy]

GO!! I concur with what everyone else has said - this is good for you (which is, in turn, good for your kids), your setting a good example - your kids see you exercise and taking time for yourself, they are playing somewhere new, socializing and building up their immunity if they are around new germs.

FWIW, I've been taking my little 8 month DS to my gym's care facility for about 1-2 months now and it has been so good for me! I think he enjoys it too (since I make sure we go when it's his play time), he can see other babies and play with different toys. My gym is really nice and secure. They also give pagers if a parent is paranoid or the child is new to the facility.

[Sarah]

Your friend is nuts! They're not like, 1 week old or anything. I think you're setting a great example, letting them interact with other kids, and getting a little break. Good for you.

[ManteoChik]

I would listen to a darn thing your friend says. :) If it makes you happy, and your children are happy - go for it!

FWIW, my best friend has been *struggling* to get rid of the baby weight she's been carrying around from her two kids. I could tell it's really been affecting her the past few years and I've done as much as possible to help her stay motivated and work out with her. Her biggest hangup is the her DH travels a lot for work (as does my BF, they work in the same profession) and so he was not a reliable source for childcare so she could work out - and it seems ridiculous to have to find (and pay!) a sitter each time she wanted to work out.

Finally a couple months ago I suggested that she join our local YMCA, because they have the childwatch. She hesitated for a couple weeks and ultimately decided to join. I haven't seen her this happy in quite a long time and she is sooooo happy she did it and has already lost about 17 lbs and still going. Her 3.5 yo DD is totally unfazed by the childwatch and enjoys playing with the other kids. Her 2 yo DS was reluctant at first but at long as she drops him off with a snack he's happy to eat and by the time he finishes has totally forgotten about her leaving and starts to play.