View Full Version : Feeling Sad today.
I posted about my cousin on the "other" board so I'll give a little back ground.
She was diagnosed with breast cancer 2 years ago. She underwent a lumpectomy, chemo, and radiation. It went away. A year later, it came back. This time she under went a double mastectomy, more chemo and radiation. Within a month or two, tumors had developed under the skin graft. More chemo and radiation. Fast forward to June 05, nothing was working. They had exhaused all forms of treatment and were looking into experiamental and natural remidies while treating her pain with high doese of morphine.
Last weekend, she wanted to go camping. Her husband tried to talk her out of it, but she is stubborn (must run in the family) and they made a comprimise and went up to the UP of Michigan and stayed in a hotel. It lasted one day. She couldn't breath. So now she is on oxygen.
Last night they had to call Hospice to see if she could get a higher dose of her morphine. The Hospice people told her husband that it will probibly be a matter of days. So my mom and Aunt (her mom) are heading up from Florida to Michigan to be with her and her husband. I'll probibly be going up there this weekend one way or the other.
Ladies, she's only 35. To young for this to be happening. I can not stress the importance of checking your breasts for lumps. And once you reach 35, have your yearly mamogram done. They think her cancer may have been caused by the fertilitly drugs she was taking so her had her husband could have a family (and they never were able to have kids), but they don't know for sure. Just don't mess around with your health. If you find something strange, go get it checked (she did but it was just VERY agressive). Support cancer research do what you can to help find cures for these horrible diseases so no one has to go thru this heart ache!!
08-08-2005, 10:41 AM
I am so sorry to hear about your cousin, how difficult this must be for you and your family.
Best wishes to your cousin and all who are touched by her life.
08-08-2005, 10:58 AM
I am so sorry. :(
so sorry, you are in my thoughts
08-08-2005, 02:59 PM
You, your cousin and your family are in my thoughts.
08-08-2005, 03:29 PM
I'm sorry. My aunt is in a similar situation, although not as young. Lots of love to your family & her husband at this tough time. :(
I'll be saying some prayers for your cousin and family too. Both of my Grandmother's, a cousin and an Uncle are all battling Cancer now. I can totally sympathize with you.
We participated in the Relay for Life this year. I made and sold Cancer Awareness bracelets, and made $550! Our team raised $1500. In total we all raised $175k.
Every little bit helps.
Take care, and hang in there.
08-08-2005, 03:59 PM
Thinking of your family...
08-08-2005, 07:33 PM
I am so sorry to hear about your cousin. (((Hugs))) You're story hits very close to home for me. My mom passed away this year (February 14th) from Breast Cancer. (she was only 49!) My mom and your cousin have very similar stories. She was diagnosed, treated, and went into remission for a year. The cancer came back she had more surgeries and treated again with chemotherpy & radiation but it was more aggresive and it eventually took her life. Hospice was also called in and I can not say enough about them. They were awesome.
This is such a difficult time for your family and I pray that your cousin will not have to suffer one minute more than she has too. This is what I felt was the hardest part. I hated to see my mom suffer. Hang in there. Know that we are all thinking of you. Keep us udated.
Thank you all for your kind words. They really do help. And for those who have lost loved one's to this aweful disease, I'm truely sorry.
I talked to my mom last night. Her and my Aunt made it to Michigan. She said Sue looks aweful. Very bloated, sunken eyes and just sits holding her head because she's in so much pain. She is still able to communicate with everyone and seems to still have all her senses about her. All of her brothers and sisters are there! Which is great! There had been some major stress between the siblings over the past 10 or so years. Unfortunatly (or fortunatly?) Sue's sickness has brought them all back together.
Hospice has been wonderful, very supportive. The people who do Hospice care are sure special people.\
Her husband is hanging in there. He hasn't been sleeping. He takes care of her every need.
I'll be heading up there on Friday. I feel bad because I promised my kids we go to the state fair friday night. I'm sure they'll understand, but I still feel bad.
08-13-2005, 08:13 AM
Just wanted to drop in and check on you.
08-13-2005, 04:07 PM
Just popping in to say that I have added your cousin and her husband to my prayers!
Your cousin and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
We did go up to Michigan on Saturday. I guess I just hadn't mentally prepared myself as I should have. I guess I don't know what I was expecting and I was shocked. I knew she wouldn't be the Sue I knew, heck she's been sick for two years now. She is now on continous morphine, only about half of her right lung is working (the left isn't working at all) she is on the liquid oxygen and is in just so much pain. It was heart breaking. She did wake up and I did get to talk to her, even if she didn't open her eyes. She knew who I was. My mom had told her I was coming to visit. When I said "Hi Sue, it's me, Janeen" she said "Hi sis" (my nick name growing up was sissy cuz I was the youngest out of my cousins) so I know she knew who I was. I really didn't know what to say to her and I really don't remember. As I was leaving the room, I heard her say something (she can't talk above a whisper) and I walked back to her to ask her what she said, and she said "take care of yourself" I about lost it. I did good until later in the day when we getting ready to leave, I went into her room with my mom (her DH and MIL were in there) and my mom went and said good-bye and started to cry and that was all I could take. Her MIL told me, "honey, you can say good-bye too" I couldn't do it. Her words sounded so final to me. All I could say was, I can't, and I hugged her DH and went out into the living room. It's just not fair. That's all I can think, it's just not fair.
I was talking to her sister and she told me one time this past week, Sue had woken up and said "My little girl wants me to come home". She doesn't have any kids, but she did have a miscarriage several years ago. We think it was this baby waiting for her mom to come home.
Also, my aunt, her mom, is not handeling this well. She is feeling guilty for things in the past. She feels she wasn't there for the kids while they were growing up. We keep telling her (my mom, me, my sister and her kids) that all the kids turned out fine. You can't beat yourself up for things in the past. They don't hold anything against her.
Any way, thanks for reading. It helps me to type this all out. Please keep praying for comfort for Sue and her DH, along with the rest of the family.
All of your kind words do help me.
I'll update when the inevitable happens.
Suzanne Elizabeth Collins Blanchard
October 21, 1969 - August 17, 2005
Thank you all for your support.
08-18-2005, 10:54 AM
Oh Janeen, I am so sorry. You and your family will be in my thoughts.
08-18-2005, 11:57 AM
I am so sorry. You and your family are in my prayers.
Best wishes in this difficult time.
08-18-2005, 01:43 PM
I am so sorry. Your family is in my prayers.
I am so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
I wanted to share the words Sue's husband sent out in an e-mail. He is the most strong and amazing man I know (and I know some pretty wonderful men!)
On 8/17/05, Sue finally beat the pain and suffering that her cancer had caused for these past two years. She passed away at 10:29 p.m. after a long and courageous fight. While this is the hardest thing I have ever had to face, I was fortunate to have her in my life. I was also given the blessing of being able to say goodbye and hold her as she died. As much as I hurt and feel empty at this time, I know that she would not want us to be sad for long. She is a unique and wonderful woman who always saw the upside to everything, no matter how bad it seemed. She left this world only because her body gave out, her spirit never did!
thank you all for your kind words. They really do mean alot to me.
That he could be so strong, and be thankful that he had her in his life is an indication of what a wonderful person she was as well.
I hurt for you. I really do. I am sitting here with tears in my eyes, truly touched by what you have said and what her husband wrote.
08-21-2005, 07:02 PM
His testament to her is truly a measure of the great woman she was. My sincere condolences.
08-21-2005, 07:22 PM
I'm so sorry, I know how hard this has been for you. My aunt is 62 and is dying from cancer. In fact, we were told it was only a matter of days, maybe two weeks at most, on the day your cousin died. Cancer is such a tragic disease - the knowledge that you have a death sentence is just so heartbreaking. I'm glad her suffering is finally over, it sounds like it was really rough for her at the end. Be glad she'll always be with you in your heart, and that you had someone to show you how to live and die bravely.
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