Worst overshare you've heard [Archive]

jbenny75

04-17-2007, 04:59 PM

Overshare, TMI, whatever you'd like to call it...what's the worst that you've heard?

I think I heard mine today. I went through the drive through at McDonald's, where the woman waiting on me completely f'ed up my order. It was really bad, so bad that I'm surprised I drove away with any food at all. Which is why I shouldn't be surprised that she shared with me the fact that she was scatterbrained today because she had her period. Ummm, you just had your hands all over my food, I really did not need to know that. I wondered if she remembered to wash her hands after last time she'd been in the restroom since she was such an airhead today. I wanted to throw my food out the window as I drove away. BLECH!

eli1126

04-17-2007, 05:05 PM

A friend once told me about a skin tag on her DH's ball sack. Not terribly gross, but I really didn't need to know.

Ferris

04-17-2007, 05:09 PM

A lady at work told me that she had to give her husband an early Valentine's Day gift of a blow job so she could go to a concert. Ummm, talk about uncomfortable, especially since I teach her daughter and see her husband on a regular basis.

Fenway

04-17-2007, 05:21 PM

A patient sitting in our (half full) waiting room at work was talking loudly on her cell about how she just had an abortion, but the doctor screwed up and the pregnancy hadn't been terminated. She went on to say that she never had problems with the other TWO abortions she had. :eek:

I peeked out to see who it was. It happened to be a girl I went to High school with!

ETA: I'm pro-choice, but some things should be kept as private matters.

ejs

04-17-2007, 05:26 PM

I would describe our relationship with our next-door neighbor as polite, but I wouldn't describe us as friends. He had mentioned that he was having surgery. We saw him a few weeks later when he was heading out for a walk. We asked how he was doing and he said "Pretty well, thanks for asking." That should have been the end of the conversation. But he had to go on and tell us that he'd had a catheter for more than a week and had been wearing adult diapers for a few weeks and was going to have to wear them for a few more weeks. How do you even reply to that?

MLA

04-17-2007, 05:28 PM

Oh, I can beat all y'all. I used to work for an orchestra, and oftentimes we had fundraising events, to which some players were invited to mingle with donors. Donors generally got a real kick out of talking with the musicians. And the musicians got free food. Win win, right?

Well, there was one event where the poor donors (actually in this case they were volunteers) who were at the table with one of our musicians LOST, as said musician decided to tell them all about her vaginitis. At dinner.

This woman was big into over-sharing. I knew about every yeast infection she ever had. I swear. It was like being her doctor without being paid for it. :rolleyes:

AHammer

04-17-2007, 05:31 PM

I used to work with a lady who thrived on telling people her personal business. she told me things like how her husband would make her and her baby go stay at his mother's house so he could bring prostitutes to their house and get high.

the sad thing is, I met her husband a few times, and I do not doubt that this was true.

keska

04-17-2007, 05:33 PM

Back when I was a grad student and went to the student health center, I sat in the waiting room for 2 hours with a group of about students who were loudly discussing how they were there to be treated for pubic lice. Apparently, there had been a rather serious outbreak in the dorms.

LexyLou

04-17-2007, 05:35 PM

I'm dying here. These are hysterical. I have to think about this a bit. I've heard a lot of overshares in my time.

Fenway

04-17-2007, 05:37 PM

I have another one.

MIL told me DH was conceived in the back of their VW Bus...

TMI about ILs sex life...

jbenny75

04-17-2007, 05:38 PM

megc1

04-17-2007, 05:40 PM

I am a pharmacist and I once had a woman tell me she was being treated for herpes on her vocal cords. :eek: Wow-that was a new one for me and I still can't believe she felt the need to share that!

laura

04-17-2007, 05:40 PM

Well not the worst ever, but along the lines above...

My SIL is not shy in sharing that as a teenager, she had to move her bed away from the wall b/c her ILs headboard was against the other side and they are, er, amorous. And she went on to say if FIL was showering at night, it was a sure thing they just... I had to cut her off there. That is way TMI. I mean great for them after 30 yrs of marriage, but still - TMI!

jbenny75

04-17-2007, 05:41 PM

I have another one that I just thought of.

A former co-worker once spotted me reading an issue of Cosmo in our office lounge. How can I put this nicely? You wouldn't want to be stuck with a picture of her having sex in your head. I'll just put it that way. There must have been something about a sex article on the Cosmo cover. She proceded to share with me how she could climax just by having her nipples sucked on. Ugh.

ysolde

04-17-2007, 05:47 PM

I was working with a partner who was wearing a pager. His pager went off, he looked at it, and he said, "Excuse me, but I have to go home now. My wife and I are trying to get pregnant, and we are having fertility issues, so timing is really important." I just sat there, legal pad in one hand, pen in the other, mouth hanging open, as he reached for his jacket and rushed out of the office, a man on a mission.

girlygirl_7

04-17-2007, 05:48 PM

This conversation that I had with a woman that I used to go to grammer school with. Hadn't talked to her in years and I ran into her when my son was weeks old . . .

Her:How much did he weight?
Me: 7 lbs. 2 ounces
Her: Wow! My kids have to be at least 8 lbs. or more or they would just fall out of my vagina!

Not sure what exactly she meant, but I came to gross (visual) conclusion on my own. :p

udsweetpea

04-17-2007, 05:56 PM

I had a friend once tell me she loved giving blow jobs because she loved how the cum would "hit the back of her throat and knock her head back." Way too much info!

Niobe

04-17-2007, 06:13 PM

BFF told me all about conceiving her DD on the bathroom floor while her and her boyfriend were really drunk. I told her never to tell her DD that story. :rolleyes:

carrie9142

04-17-2007, 06:26 PM

This didn't happen to me, but happened to a friend of mine.

She was at the grocery store, just looking at produce. A lady kind of wanders over...

Stranger: Hi, how are you doing?
Friend: Hi. Good, how about you?
S: I would be a lot better if there were no child molesters in this world!
F: Um, yeah. That would be a good thing.
S: My husband just told me today, after 30 years of marriage, that he was molested at the age of 15.
F: Uh, that is terrible. I will be praying for you and your husband.

Apparently she found out...and went to the grocery store? And told a stranger? Who was shopping with her toddler? She had no idea how to handle it or what to say!

AHammer

04-17-2007, 06:31 PM

Wow, some of these are totally bizarre!

I thought of another one (also from that co-worker I mentioned earlier.) She'd been telling me a lot about how she and her husband were TTC, telling me all about how they have sex every morning and what her CM was like. Anyway, we both had 1st period off (teachers), and she runs into my room one day waving a used pregnancy test and shoved it at me, as if she wanted me to hold it to look at it. She was pregnant and wanted me to know, but I really didn't need to see the peed-on evidence! I certainly didn't want to HOLD it!

lml41981

04-17-2007, 06:39 PM

I used to work with a woman who told me all about her daughter's first time and about how she helped set the hotel room up with rose petals on the bed and a romantic CD and then she and her daughter went to VS to pick out some romantic lingerie.

Not anything I'd have ever wanted to do with my mom, but whateva.

ginadc

04-17-2007, 06:52 PM

From my mother, of all things...

Back in the days of Clinton and Monicagate, I was on the phone with mom and got on a tangent about how everyone lies about sex, some time or another. I said: "They'll say 'Oh, it was the best!' or 'Of course you were my first,' or 'Don't worry, it's okay, that happens to every guy once in awhile.'"

Mom: "It's never happened to your father!!!"

Me: :eek: Really, so glad you have a great sex life, but not something I needed to know, thanks. (Though it was pretty funny.)

MidwesternGal

04-17-2007, 07:19 PM

*Very early in my and DH's relationship, FIL shared the reason that he kept his moustache. . . because it made um. . . MIL "happy" in bed. YIKES!!!!!!!!!!!

*I told MIL that I got invited to one of those "romance parties." I meant it to be funny, because I was very very pregnant at the time, so I really didn't *need* anything. . . well, she proceeded to recommend a product to me!!!! (Kind of my own fault for brining it up, but still!)

And finally. . . .

*We were new in town and I got invited to a sales party thrown by DH's coworker and the sales rep was the wife of another of DH's coworkers. Well, after the party, the sales rep proceeded to tell me and the other gal alllllll about her and her DH's sex life, including their Christian sex seminars they attended! I felt so bad for her DH!!

Surftraitor

04-17-2007, 07:27 PM

Mine happened last week...

A coworker told me she was concerned she had "crotch rot" (her term, not mine) because she had an, um, odor when she went to the bathroom. She later came back to tell me that she forgot she ate grilled asparagus earlier all day, so its all good. DISGUSTO!

suzubeane

04-17-2007, 07:41 PM

I was just thinking the other day that we need an "overheard" thread here on CC ... but this is much better!

My Husband's younger brother was married to a woman oder than himself whose kids are closer to my age. The first time I met SIL and her grown daughters, the FIRST thing out of the younger daughter's mouth was that she had just switched up her hormonal birth control. She sat down at the restaurant table, and when someone commented she looked well, she gave us the full report.

Later during that same meal, SIL volunteered that she was 16 and 19 when her kids were born, and they have different fathers. I guess that's not really TMI, but not something you expect to be told on first meeting someone, when your common ILs are sitting right there and they never realized.

ManteoChik

04-17-2007, 07:43 PM

I guess I should start by saying that my mom and dad were married about, eh, 15 years before they divorced. So right after the divorce my mom started dating her boyfriend, Paul. She and Paul dated for about 11 years (never getting married...he didn't want to). They ended their relationship and my mom started "dating" again.

For some reason she felt the need to talk to me like I was her new best friend. We were walking through CVS Pharmacy when she told me that she needed to buy condoms and asked me which ones she should get. :eek: I was mortified, since this was my mother after all. Once she found them she didn't want to buy them and asked me if I would. I'm sorry, but I don't care how old I am.....I WILL NOT BUY MY MOTHER CONDOMS.

sublime311

04-17-2007, 07:57 PM

One weekend night during HS, my friends and I went to a movie theater popular with the kids at our HS. One of my friends ran into a guy she liked who happened to be going into our theater. After a while, my friend disappeared into the back of the theater saying that she was going to go talk to this guy. We didn't see her again until we walked outside after the movie. She came up to us with a big smile on her face. While we were questioning where she went she said "touch this" and handed me her sweater. I touched a wet spot. She casually laughed and said "it's cum!" OMG... So not cool.

ladybug777

04-17-2007, 08:04 PM

My boss came into work and proceded to tell us how tired she was b/c she'd f'd her date (a blind date mind you) all night. Yep, her words, not mine.:rolleyes:

Cali_Katy

04-17-2007, 08:07 PM

*Very early in my and DH's relationship, FIL shared the reason that he kept his moustache. . . because it made um. . . MIL "happy" in bed. YIKES!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh my goodness, I'm dying over here!

Standrea

04-17-2007, 08:58 PM

These are hysterical!!

About 7 years ago, BFF's dad died. One night a few months later, a bunch of us girls were at her house and got talking about sex. Apparently her mother was listening, and started to chime in on how we all should try anal because it's "just amazing". Ok, gross. Not the picture i want to picture, especially since her parents were like my second set of parents. The wierdest part about it is she would normally NEVER say anything like this AT ALL!!!

snowzilla

04-17-2007, 09:48 PM

OMG, these are hysterical. I'm blanking on overshares right now, although I can think of other peoples' overshares that have been told to me after the fact! I'm reading these out loud to DH, and laughing so hard. Hilarious. :)

Niobe

04-17-2007, 09:59 PM

LIZNKEITH

04-18-2007, 05:47 AM

These are hilarious. I have one that just happened last week.

I work with a 22 year old guy who feels the need to share everything with my BFF and I since we're closer to his age than anyone else in the office.

He got up, went to the bathroom, and announced to BFF and I upon his return that he just had "the piss shivers". Call me naive, but I had no idea that this even happened to guys. I just stared at him dumbfounded and told him to never share with me what goes on behind closed doors. Of course, after I walked away I had to laugh. Who shares something like that with their coworkers??

LIZNKEITH

04-18-2007, 05:53 AM

Just thought of another...

Shortly after DH and I got married, FIL disclosed to us that in MIL's later years, she became sexually insatiable and enjoyed wearing lingerie for him. If that's not bad enough, when we were cleaning out the house after he passed away we found two HUGE garbage bags filled with lingerie that had clearly been used. I still gag to this day.

ajb524

04-18-2007, 06:43 AM

A teenage girl running the drive through at Taco bell appologized for my order taking so long. She then went on to tell me that she really shouldn't be at work, b/c she had a really terrible car accident earlier in the day and was coughing up blood and felt really dizzy. I told her she may need to go to the hospital and she said her manager wouldn't let her leave. Um, I think Taco Bell could survive without her manning the drive thru :rolleyes:

May27JnJ

04-18-2007, 07:06 AM

My grandma died in 94 and my Paw-Paw got remarried 8 months after that. My grandfather was out of his mind on medicine b/c he had just had colon surgery. He was talking about my grandma being "his first". That convo ended and switched quickly since my step-grandmother didn't want to talk about it. Then he said, "I lied. I was in Graysons Cave with whatshername. I dropped my red comb, and when she came back up she said Oh Grady!" I turned 50 shades of red since this was my DH's first trip to Alabama and meeting my Paw-Paw.

scarlett

04-18-2007, 07:12 AM

I was in a community concert band a few years ago, and there was an older woman who sat next to me. For some reason she felt it necessary to share that the night before she had been up sick and cleaning diarrhea off of herself. Ick. It was such an disgusting story. What posesses people to share something like that? It was so disgusting I couldn't even bring myself to repeat it to anyone.

And I know how my dad lost his virginity. It's a cool story, but not something a daughter needs to know.

j*east

04-18-2007, 07:14 AM

2 come to mind....

A former (not close) coworker of DH's told him that she was undergoing an abortion, and had recently had a threesome with her husband and another colleague (a woman, and DH's boss) in their hot tub. Then she kept inviting us over to use the hot tub. Uh, no thanks! Even worse: the hot tubbing colleagues were the principal and college counselor at a high school.

Recently, a neighbor of ours (another teacher) told DH that she and her husband have been TTC for months, but haven't been successful, and she's worried b/c her DH has used cocaine in the past..."but only once or twice."

I guess DH just has one of those "tell me everything" faces. ??

diam124

04-18-2007, 07:14 AM

A couple months before my wedding I was in a specialty lingerie store with MIL and my Mom picking out a headpiece for my veil. They were one of those super-romantic stores (not trashy) and had a small display of massage lotions as well as some edible body paint, etc. My MIL told me and my Mom that she loved to use the chocolate body paint with FIL. :eek: My DH was totally mortified when I told him that.

PrincessPeach

04-18-2007, 07:19 AM

When DH and I were engaged, we went to his sister's wedding over Labor Day weekend. It was the first time I had met his grandparents and most of his family. We were seated with his grandmother at the reception and she got pretty sloshed as the evening went on and proceeded to tell me that DH's younger sister was conceived when the ILs went skinny dipping and got a little carried away. EEP! I did NOT need to know that. And, why did the ILs tell the grandparents anyway?!?! Dude.

eli1126

04-18-2007, 07:43 AM

I remembered two more:

An old friend of DH's told us we just had to try licking each others a$$holes because it gave you a zing just like when you lick a screen door! Yummy!

A coworker at my old job was out sick one day and the next day proceeded to tell us all how she was in bed with her DH and felt like she had to fart and instead shit all over herself and her DH :eek:

countrymouse

04-18-2007, 07:46 AM

In a random conversation with MIL about how I loved being a waitress when I was in college, she proceeded to tell me how SIL got terrible hemorroids when she was a waitress from the stress of carrying heavy trays. It had absolutely nothing to do with our conversation in the first place, and I'm sure SIL would have died to know her mom was telling me about her butt-issues.

Another time, my DH was really nervous before he had to make a big public speech, and had an upset stomach all day anticipating it. After the speech (which went fine by the way), MIL told anyone who would listen that he had diarhea all day because he was so nervous. She really has no filter about what is appropriate to share.

Kate&Joey

04-18-2007, 07:57 AM

A couple of weeks ago, DH was on a business trip and stopped to get gas and go to the bathroom. Even though it is a general rule that men do not make eye contact in restrooms ;) , as he was standing at the urinal, a man came out of the stalls. With DH's peripheral vision, he could not help but notice that the guy HAD NO PANTS ON! The dude proceeds to take his pants to the sink, start rinsing them out, and tell DH all about how when you "get to be my age" you have to start worrying about loss of bowel control and other lovely factoids. He had pooped himself in the car! :eek: Gaah...who needs to discuss this with a stranger in a gas station bathroom????

jimmysgirl424

04-18-2007, 07:58 AM

The absolute worst overshare ever (for me)

My mother and stepfather experienced a "re-birth" of their marriage a few years back after about 8 years of not having sex. (didn't need to know that, thanks). Anyway, she one day proceeds to tell me that when they had sex for the first time following their 'dry spell' that they were in the middle of the deed and she made him stop so she could go down on him. :eek: I was freakin' horrified and grossed out all at once. Oh, and she told my sister the story too, so neither one of us has been able to forget about it. The image is burned into my brain, much to my horror.

PG-rated

04-18-2007, 08:13 AM

My mom has a tendency to overshare about her past sex life. While I'm fine discussing more general things with her, I've learned from past experience to stop her when it seems like she's going to elaborate. When I had questions about birth control, it was useful to know that a condom accident had produced my brother. I did NOT need to know the exact circumstances of the condom accident. :rolleyes:

chefker

04-18-2007, 08:14 AM

I have a co-worker who doesn't seem to have that 'internal censoring' mechanism that most NORMAL people have. :rolleyes:

A few things she's revealed (not just to me, but to a GROUP of us in the breakroom!):

Once she and her hubby were having sex on their futon--while she was on her period--and she bled all over the futon. She was 'wondering' if any of us had any tips on how to clean it. Eww!

Along the same topic, she's revealed (often) that she and her hubby actually have trouble having sex, because "my vagina is too small!" And, she's shared details about her IBS troubles. Usually while I'm microwaving my lunch, or getting water in the breakroom. Just ducky.

AttyGrl74

04-18-2007, 08:15 AM

All of the supreme-overshares that are popping into my brain came from here on CC.

pocahontas

04-18-2007, 08:40 AM

For some reason she felt the need to talk to me like I was her new best friend. We were walking through CVS Pharmacy when she told me that she needed to buy condoms and asked me which ones she should get. :eek: I was mortified, since this was my mother after all. Once she found them she didn't want to buy them and asked me if I would. I'm sorry, but I don't care how old I am.....I WILL NOT BUY MY MOTHER CONDOMS.BWAHAHA!! :D This visual is simply hilarious.

kam

04-18-2007, 08:43 AM

All of the supreme-overshares that are popping into my brain came from here on CC.

Yup! Same thing I was thinking.

RobynScott

04-18-2007, 08:48 AM

My overshare came from a neighbor's mother. I'm afraid to post it in case someone would recognize the participants (unlikely, I know). Needless to say - I learned all about the sex (or lack thereof) between neighbor and her now-ex fiancee, as well as the fact that they discovered he liked to check out porn of fat women (her words not mine) on the internet -so the you're too heavy excuse was just a lie for him (the ex-fiancee) to avoid sex.

I was listening to all of this screaming TMI in my head wondering how fast I could make an exhibit. Learning about your neighbor's sex life (or lack thereof) from her mom - and the porn habits of ex-neighbor - a little too much information for me!

trishcutie

04-18-2007, 08:48 AM

Here's a good one:

My BOSS, yes, my boss, whose wife used to work for the company and I have met before, shared the following with me at various points during my pregnancy:

Did I get vaircose veins? Because his wife got them all over her vagina while pregnant and they couldn't have sex for the second half of her pregnancy. It was very painful for her.

Do my husband and I find it hard to get time alone? Because they've REALLY had to get creative with sex since they've had two kids. Bathroom, kitchen, on the floor next to the bed since their kids sleep with them, even in the car while the kids are sleeping in the back. One time, they were on their way to the zoo, and the kids had JUST fallen asleep in the car, so they went and got two 40 oz. beers and had sex on the hood so they wouldn't wake the kids.

And the topper for me? Let me think of the exact verbage..."She wants another one so bad, that last night she pulled the "legs wrapped around my back" move so I couldn't pull out." Then looks at me like I know exactly what he's talking about...

I should add that he's not at all a perv, but feels like this stuff can be shared since I'm pregnant with kids, and we have these things "in common."

snowzilla

04-18-2007, 09:29 AM

All of the supreme-overshares that are popping into my brain came from here on CC.

Hehe, yup, I can think of a few. And I always get that Phoebe-voice in my head from Friends, "Now I've seen everything!" when I read them. :D

AHammer

04-18-2007, 09:40 AM

After reading all this, I am SO GLAD that my parents and I have never discussed sex. ever. I can't imagine knowing some of these things about your parents and/or ILs!

greenbunny

04-18-2007, 10:02 AM

I was listening to all of this screaming TMI in my head wondering how fast I could make an exhibit.

:D Truly excellent Freudian slip.

isaacsmommy

04-18-2007, 10:28 AM

Hehe these are hilarious.

The only one I can think of off the top of my head is the coworker who would tell us about what she was going to do to her dh when she got home from work and was often quite explicit. I always just kind acted like I was listening, but never responded- then I'd find an excuse to go do something.

Asha

04-18-2007, 10:32 AM

Did I get vaircose veins? Because his wife got them all over her vagina while pregnant and they couldn't have sex for the second half of her pregnancy. It was very painful for her.

omg!! not only is this tmi, i didn't even know this was possible.

isaacsmommy

04-18-2007, 10:34 AM

Definately TMI, but yes it is possible Asha. (I know this from school not personal exp)

gardenmommy

04-18-2007, 10:36 AM

I'm laughing so hard overe here...

The only one that comes to mind right now is the time my BFF's mom pulled me aside at my baby shower to tell me that I need to start roughing up my nipples so they are tough for breastfeeding...then she spotted DH and asked him to come over so she could tell him too, and that maybe he could help.

Needless to say my BFF was mortified when I told ehr about my lovely convo with her mom.

Asha

04-18-2007, 10:36 AM

Definately TMI, but yes it is possible Asha. (I know this from school not personal exp)
sure. ;) they taught that to you in sex ed during h.s.? that's a sure fire way to encourage abstinence in teenagers. :)

isaacsmommy

04-18-2007, 10:40 AM

Hehe, actually I meant college (I am a nurse), but I think it should be added to sex ed in HS just to see the response on HS students faces would be priceless! :D

katmg

04-18-2007, 10:55 AM

An old friend of DH's told us we just had to try licking each others a$$holes because it gave you a zing just like when you lick a screen door! Yummy!

Wait...is licking a screen door something that we're all supposed to have done?? I think I can deal with not experiencing either of those zings!

My mother has now told me twice that the birth control options after having kids weren't great b/c my father really hated condoms. Thanks mom...I think I got the picture the first time ya told me!

ysolde

04-18-2007, 11:02 AM

The CC sex ed class:

Well students, if you have unprotected sex, this could happen to you:

HIV/AIDS
Herpes
Gonorrhea
Clamydia
Other STDs
Pregnancy, which can lead to:

Hemorrhoids
Genital varicose veins
The sharing of really intimate secrets with future daughters and dauters in law
Potential unknown embarrassment on the Internet

Don't let THIS happen to you!

1_mommy

04-18-2007, 11:06 AM

when i was in jr high, i overhead 2 boys bragging about how they set an abondoned grocery store on fire.

my dad was a fire captian, so you can bet i let him know ;) yea, i narked on em

isaacsmommy

04-18-2007, 11:12 AM

jbenny75

04-18-2007, 11:15 AM

These stories are hilarious!

MrsBeckyLP

04-18-2007, 11:16 AM

A coworker at my old job was out sick one day and the next day proceeded to tell us all how she was in bed with her DH and felt like she had to fart and instead shit all over herself and her DH :eek:

That is sooo nasty :eek: . Why would anyone EVER share that???

:D Truly excellent Freudian slip.

I totally missed that when I read it ... funny! ;)

Jenyfer9

04-18-2007, 11:16 AM

JamBray

04-18-2007, 11:17 AM

This wasn't heard, but seen by me (twice). A few years ago a package came to our office for my boss, and since I open all of his mail I proceeded to rip it open. Much to my surprise inside were a bunch of sex tapes (from my brief glance they seemed more like the "romantic" or even instructional kind than porn)! :eek: Why he had them shipped to the office I have no idea, but needless to say after being hit with that twice, I now no longer open anything without first making sure I know who it's coming from. :p

phoenics

04-18-2007, 11:32 AM

My mailman told my neighbor and me that he walked in on his wife having an affair with another man... and now he's (the mail carrier) not sure if the baby that she is carrying is his! Um... thanks. Can I just have my mail please?

Stories like this always make me so sad. Like that story where the woman was in the grocery store lamenting about the fact that her husband was molested.

I honestly think that people in these situations are in some terrible shock and lose all sense of 'privacy', kwim?

Not that it doesn't feel strange when you're the one they're 'losing it' in front of.

NotDesperate

04-18-2007, 11:38 AM

He got up, went to the bathroom, and announced to BFF and I upon his return that he just had "the piss shivers".

What the heck is that?? :eek:

mpc863

04-18-2007, 11:43 AM

My SIL is also missing the internal censoring chip. We were in Vegas for a trade show and the 4 of us were sharing a room with 2 double beds(she was just dating my BIL then). The next morning she told me that they were having trouble falling asleep so they had sex.

It's bad enough that they thought it was cool to have sex with us 2 feet away (i am so thankful that i didn't wake up!) but why in the world did she tell me about it!!! :eek:

I tune her out a lot now b/c she wants to share everything.

isaacsmommy

04-18-2007, 11:43 AM

What the heck is that?? :eek:

I wondered also, just wasn't brave enough to ask.

petdoc08

04-18-2007, 11:50 AM

My MIL is the queen of TMI. Two oldie but goodies (we were 16 or so when she shared this info)

Me: eating twizzlers ropes that DH (BF at the time) had found in the kitchen drawer
Her: OMG! Where did you get those?
Me: BF gave them to me, he found them in the kitchen drawer.
Her: Those are our sex twizzlers. I tie them around DH's 'member' and then chew them off. How did they get in the kitchen??
Me: pukes in my mouth

Second scenario:
Me: Do you have any tissue, my nose is running.
Her: Umm.... Let me check.... (leaves and comes back into the room weilding a box of tissue) Here, this is all I have but don't use them all. I use them to wipe up after sex.
Me: Pukes in my mouth

NotDesperate

04-18-2007, 11:53 AM

I wondered also, just wasn't brave enough to ask.

Well I really want to know!

Ok, I have my own TMI to share.

When I was a senior in college, I started a big, semester long, internship. And on the first day I was in the car with a coworker and she is on the phone venting to her friend about her sexcapades (anal, in the car, on a blind date, etc) and now she has a UTI and blah blah blah. I am mortified in the passenger seat!

Another TERRIBLE TMI is when my grandma was telling me about how when my dad was a toddler one of his nuts hadn't descended yet so he had to go to the doctor. I am sure my dad would just die if he knew I knew that. I know I almost died! :eek: :eek: :eek:

maplekitty

04-18-2007, 12:14 PM

I was at the food court with a friend and our babies, and this lady comes up to us to look at the babies. She goes on about how cute they are and stuff and then she says "i wanted to have a cute baby too, but i just had a miscarriage yesterday, so now I wont". My friend and I were just like.....uuuuummmmmm......okay. Like what do you say to that?!?! We were both like, "i'm sorry to hear that". It was SO AWKWARD!!!!

oshannon

04-18-2007, 12:44 PM

Must be something about MILs...

Mine has told me that DH was concieved in the bed that is now in our guest room, AND that FIL prefers large sized condoms.

lowcountrywed

04-18-2007, 01:11 PM

KiKi'sMommy

04-18-2007, 01:25 PM

I am thinking the pee shivers (which I may be wrong) is when you wait for a while to pee and then when you actually let it out, it makes you shiver.

NotDesperate

04-18-2007, 01:36 PM

I am thinking the pee shivers (which I may be wrong) is when you wait for a while to pee and then when you actually let it out, it makes you shiver.

Well that is what I wondered too but why would that be something that women have but men don't?

AHammer

04-18-2007, 01:42 PM

I am thinking the pee shivers (which I may be wrong) is when you wait for a while to pee and then when you actually let it out, it makes you shiver.

Two definitions from urbandictionary.com

1. piss shivers

The feeling experienced when a person (perticularly male) urinates; can be used colloquially to describe any other experience which causes the same or similar feeling.

The bridge of that song gave me piss shivers.

2. piss shivers

When you get goose bumps when you need to pee.

e.g. "Whoa! Look at my arms -- piss shivers! I need to pee..."

weird, huh?

diedra1027

04-18-2007, 02:25 PM

At my old job, our post work cocktail hours were famous for over sharing incidents.

One girl had enough to drink that she let loose with the following:
1) She was currently under doctors orders not to have sex for two weeks due to surgery on her cervix (I'm guessing she had a LEEP, but I didn't follow up with her!).

2) Since she couldn't have sex, her boyfriend had officially declared her "The Blow Job Queen". The funny part about this is that the next day someone brought in a specially decorated BK crown to honor her new 'title'.

3) She went into graphic detail on her special blow job 'moves'.

Definitely one of those get togethers that lead to not being able to make eye contact with co-workers the next day.

Jenyfer9

04-18-2007, 02:30 PM

OMG, I can't believe that I forgot the overshare of all overshares! FIL was talking to me (he wasn't yet my FIL) about dh and I's recent trip to Hawaii. DH had told me that he'd never been to Hawaii before. When I was saying this, FIL looked at me and said, "He's been to Hawaii. That's where MIL concieved him. At least we *think* that's where he was concieved. We had a lot of sex back then."

Ok, EEEWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Although I have to say that I have absolutely NO desire to find out what kind of condom FIL prefers. YIKES!!!

Ohana

04-18-2007, 02:45 PM

I think my favorite overshare is from an old coworker. Apparently she was super in the mood, but also 7 months pg. So she went and got super revealing lingerie. When her husband came home, she dropped the robe and commanded him to do as he would with her.

Ew. I knew her husband, too, and couldn't keep a straight face whenever I saw him after that.

Oh, and she also told me how she hung a black bra on her bedroom door to let her DH (who worked nights at the time) know he should hurry up and come to bed to please his woman.

Adaya

04-18-2007, 03:03 PM

A coworker at my old job was out sick one day and the next day proceeded to tell us all how she was in bed with her DH and felt like she had to fart and instead shit all over herself and her DH :eek:

This made me choke on my water. LMAO!! Nasty, but funny as hell. :D

I'm loving this thread.

PG-rated

04-18-2007, 03:13 PM

The problem with oversharing is it tends to get around...I have a few good ones that I heard second- or third-hand. I'm sure the person who said them wouldn't have said them to ME, but you can't control who repeats what.

pixielou

04-18-2007, 03:51 PM

years ago - i was in my 20's (married), i had a male co-worker in his 50's (single). i reallly became good friends with the guy - we belonged to the same bicycling club. he calls me at home to chat one day. tells me he will be going on medical leave - something to do with his prostrate. ok i can deal with that. goes on to tell me that he is having some testing the next morning - testing in which he is not allowed to have sex for 48 hours prior. ok - on the verge of tmi. goes on to explain that that means sex with or without a partner. ok - i didn't need to know that much.

~pixie

Ilovemygeek

04-18-2007, 11:35 PM

I had a really nasty coworker recently tell a bunch of us at work that he did not need to worry about safe sex because he only has sex with himself. There was a hush over the group as we all tried to keep the contents of our lunch in our stomachs.

LIZNKEITH

04-19-2007, 05:15 AM

Piss Shivers- from what I understand, it's exactly what the name implies. He said sometimes when guys piss, they get a case of the chills. Who knew? Boys can be so weird.

VASLP

04-19-2007, 05:41 AM

Years and years ago (like I was in Junior High) my parents went on their first cruise. My father was telling my brother, who was recently married, that the seas were really rocky the first night out. My mother chimed in with "I don't know how you'd know...that wasn't the only thing rocking that night!!!". :eek: My brother was soooo traumatized that he of course immediately had to share the story with my other brother and I so he wasn't the only one with that awful image. And I've NEVER forgotten it!! AHHHHHH!

cr8zyforaf

04-19-2007, 06:26 AM

A coworker told a table of us that her neigbor (she lives in an apartment) constantly complains that she is too loud at night when she is using her v*brator...umm, yuck.

JennW

04-19-2007, 06:51 AM

This thread is cracking me up. I am reading along and I swear each one is worse than the one before!:D

LIZNKEITH

04-19-2007, 10:44 AM

This thread is cracking me up. I am reading along and I swear each one is worse than the one before!:D

I don't know...I'm still laughing over the moustache story. I think you should get him this shirt for his birthday, MidWesternGal:
https://shop.2checkout.com/img/0/42/78/41/products/427841X71X1.gif

December27JJB

04-19-2007, 11:10 AM

There are some really good ones on here! I cant stop laughing!

Mine involves my younger sister and my dad. My parents had just started giving us the 'sex talk.' My sister must have been 6 and I was about 10 when she walked up to my dad out of the blue and asked him, "Did you have sex with other people before mommy?" I saw the whole thing happen, watched dad's face turn white and walked away! Ick! :eek:

December27JJB

04-19-2007, 11:18 AM

Oh yeah I remember one more! I had a friend who was dating this guy and after their date she stopped by my house. She kept spitting out something and pulling something out of her teeth and said, "Oh I gave him a blowj*b, I have pubic hair stuck between my teeth." Nasty!

JennW

04-19-2007, 11:22 AM

cherry

04-19-2007, 11:24 AM

we were staying at my parents' house last year. we went out for drinks with friends one night and the next morning, weren't exactly hungover but both my husband and i were feeling slightly "delicate". my mother (completely out of character for her) came in to say good morning to us, sat down on the bed, and proceeded to tell us that she had been up half the night with diahoerrea, complete with details. i looked over at my husband and he had turned a pale shade of green. :o

MidwesternGal

04-19-2007, 11:28 AM

LIZNKEITH--Sadly, FIL would probably wear it proudly, all over. Not sure if I want to endorse that behavior!!!

jess&dan

04-19-2007, 11:56 AM

This thread is too much!

My overshare is from my step-MIL. Her and my FIL were buying my DH and I a bed as a housewarming gift. I wanted a wood sleigh bed but she insisted we should have a brass bed. Her reason was "it's great to hold onto!" (they have a brass bed). Yeah, both my DH and FIL were bright red. (She did in fact buy us that bed and it's currently in our guest room...we never could bring ourselves to use it!)

Natasha

04-19-2007, 11:58 AM

My ex boyfriend's mom was crazy as all hell. She told me the most random things. She had been a lesbian for 10 years, and had recently decided she wanted to be straight again. She met a guy online, they dated for about 3 months, he moved in, they got married 3 months later. Ok fine, not a big deal.

They had been married for about 18 months when she shared with me that she was cheating on her husband with a woman. But, please don't tell her son (my BF). :eek: Why would you tell me that!?

Scooter

04-19-2007, 12:05 PM

SunnyAB

04-19-2007, 12:11 PM

We had a couple guests (family) stop by the other week. Someone used the last of the toilet paper and didn't let us know, and it was the last roll in the bathroom. Well, right before they leave one of the guests went in there and she didn't notice the roll was empty.

A while later she comes out and tell us this:
"Um, there's no toilet paper left in the bathroom, so I had to use my hand."
:eek:

Needless to say we didn't shake hands goodbye. :p

Oh my GOSH! I think I would have run around the house with a can of disinfectant - wracking my brain to remember where she had been and spraying EACH and EVERY thing that she might have possibly touched on the way out the door!! :eek:

LexyLou

04-19-2007, 12:26 PM

A coworker at my old job was out sick one day and the next day proceeded to tell us all how she was in bed with her DH and felt like she had to fart and instead shit all over herself and her DH :eek:

OMG! This is horrible...but so funny!

I'm dying here.

espresso

04-19-2007, 01:00 PM

deleted to protect the innocent :)

NotDesperate

04-19-2007, 01:12 PM

A while later she comes out and tell us this:
"Um, there's no toilet paper left in the bathroom, so I had to use my hand."
:eek:

Needless to say we didn't shake hands goodbye. :p

This is customary in a lot of countries.

But it leads me to wonder, what do you all do when there is no TP? Drip dry? Use your hands? Use the roll? Just curious if I am handling this situation the way others do... :D

December27JJB

04-19-2007, 01:14 PM

SunnyAB

04-19-2007, 01:18 PM

Sorry - didnt mean to be insentive to anyones practices. Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do ;) - but you sure dont have to share your techniques with everyone! :p

bluberry

04-19-2007, 01:28 PM

Umm, I've never heard of using your hand to wipe up. The germaphobe in me is freaking out!

cela-bela

04-19-2007, 01:36 PM

I still haven't fully recovered from my mom telling me a few years ago that her and my dad hardly ever had sex when they were married because his penis was abnormally large and she was just too tight for him. Ugh. Barf.

Secret_Squirrel

04-19-2007, 02:51 PM

Umm, I've never heard of using your hand to wipe up. The germaphobe in me is freaking out!

Have you ever wondered while most cultures signal greeting with the right hand? The left is taboo because it had other... purposes.

LittleFredPunkinHead

04-19-2007, 03:10 PM

I remember my mom telling my sister and me about wiping with the left hand... She was in the Peace Corps in India back in the 60s.

Linz

04-19-2007, 04:08 PM

I used to work with this lady who was just a nasty, mean old lady yet she always seemed to overshare with all of us.

One Christmas party she showed us all the tattoos on her chest and ass :eek:

Everytime she was sick she would tell us how she was on the toilet all day with the runs and how bad her butt hurt. ewwww. :eek:

JennW

04-19-2007, 05:15 PM

I work with a woman who is older and always telling me about her medical issues. Last week she told me she had a D&C. Later in the day she told me she could feel stuff seeping out.

lauren f s

04-19-2007, 08:02 PM

While pregnant with DD, MIL told me how 3 of her 7 children were conceived. She had also just recently started dating and told me about sex with a current boyfriend.

Ick!!!!

Leilynne

04-19-2007, 08:33 PM

He got up, went to the bathroom, and announced to BFF and I upon his return that he just had "the piss shivers". Call me naive, but I had no idea that this even happened to guys.

What the heck is that?? :eek:

The things you can find on the internet! Piss-shivers (http://www.voltier.com/peeshiver/)

nicole

04-19-2007, 08:39 PM

When I was about 14 or so, my dad commented in front of my best friend on what he had to shave to get his vasectomy. I didn't need to know that and I'm SURE my friend didn't either!

klanae

04-19-2007, 09:23 PM

At Christmas one year my cousin was preparing for her upcoming ski trip when my dad decided to comment that sking was the most fun he has had with his clothes on! He said this in front of my whole family, my grandma was mortified! Me and my my cousin were in our early teens.

Regina Phalange

04-19-2007, 09:31 PM

This isn't gross...just disturbing.

On her second day, our new admin assistant was telling me that she was trying to gain weight (she's TINY) because her high school reunion was coming up and she wanted to look good for all the girls her husband slept with. Evidently he was a slut. He had rules that went like so: If the girl puts out on the first date, she's a slut... but if she doesn't put out before the 4th date, she gets dumped. She informed me she fit well into his rules. :eek:

Oh, and did I mention the husband is a MINISTER!???

phoenics

04-19-2007, 09:56 PM

A coworker at my old job was out sick one day and the next day proceeded to tell us all how she was in bed with her DH and felt like she had to fart and instead shit all over herself and her DH :eek:

ROTFLMAOPIMP! Ewwww *snort* Ewwwwwwwwwwww *laughs* Ewwwwww *snort* *choke* *sputters*

I cannot stop laughing!

mimieliza

04-19-2007, 10:20 PM

Me: eating twizzlers ropes that DH (BF at the time) had found in the kitchen drawer
Her: OMG! Where did you get those?
Me: BF gave them to me, he found them in the kitchen drawer.
Her: Those are our sex twizzlers. I tie them around DH's 'member' and then chew them off. How did they get in the kitchen
Me: pukes in my mouth

No way, too nasty, too nasty! I'm laughing so hard I'm crying. :D

My good friend is a perpetual oversharer. She was on "pelvic rest" for a high risk pregnancy, so she was giving her DH a BJ instead. Well, she had some problems with morning sickness, so she threw up on him in the middle of the act.

Foley42

04-20-2007, 05:48 AM

A woman I used to work with (I was only 16 at the time) told me her BF liked to go down on her while she was on her period. :eek: WTF?!

DH's Army friend told DH that him and his wife were laying in bed watching tv. He had to fart so he strained, but a turd came out instead.

Why do people even open their mouths?

AHammer

04-20-2007, 06:22 AM

DH's Army friend told DH that him and his wife were laying in bed watching tv. He had to fart so he strained, but a turd came out instead.

Why do people even open their mouths?

LOL -- seriously, why on earth would you want to share this with others?!

shopaholic

04-20-2007, 06:52 AM

jimmysgirl424

04-20-2007, 07:16 AM

A woman I used to work with (I was only 16 at the time) told me her BF liked to go down on her while she was on her period. :eek: WTF?!

:eek: :eek: WHAT??? EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!! My breakfast just did a giant somersault in my tummy.

Sarah

04-20-2007, 07:48 AM

Right before we were getting married, my FIL sat DH down for a sex talk, and proceeded to tell him about oral, vaginal, and anal sex. As if that weren't gag-worthy enough, he warned him about not focusing enough too much on oral sex, which should be, as he called it, "an appetizer," and also said that he (DH) shouldn't insist on anal too much, since "your mother doesn't like it that much." EW.

jessesgirl

04-20-2007, 09:13 AM

A woman I used to work with (I was only 16 at the time) told me her BF liked to go down on her while she was on her period. :eek:

Actually this is not quite that uncommon. I have heard plenty of men say they don't mind that at all. There is even a certain term they call it, but I can't remember it right off the top of my head.

Scooter

04-20-2007, 09:29 AM

This is customary in a lot of countries.

But it leads me to wonder, what do you all do when there is no TP? Drip dry? Use your hands? Use the roll? Just curious if I am handling this situation the way others do... :D

Well, this person is very WASPy, very unethnic (if that's a word), and I'm not even sure she's traveled out of her home state.

I'd vote for drip dry or call for help! Seriously, she's family, we would have been happy to close our eyes and throw her a roll!

Secret_Squirrel

04-20-2007, 09:48 AM

Actually this is not quite that uncommon. I have heard plenty of men say they don't mind that at all. There is even a certain term they call it, but I can't remember it right off the top of my head.

I know, but it skeeves me so much... called getting your "name of the Detroit hockey team". 'Nuff said.

phoenics

04-20-2007, 09:51 AM

I know, but it skeeves me so much... called getting your "name of the Detroit hockey team". 'Nuff said.

Not quite enough said for me - I had to look up the name!! :p

JennW

04-20-2007, 09:56 AM

Not quite enough said for me - I had to look up the name!! :p
I totally looked it up, too. I could not imagine what sports team name could possibly mean something like that, but, ew, why did I go and Google it.

jessesgirl

04-20-2007, 10:32 AM

I know, but it skeeves me so much... called getting your "name of the Detroit hockey team". 'Nuff said.

Oh, that's right! Nice clue! :p

phoenics

04-20-2007, 10:33 AM

I totally looked it up, too. I could not imagine what sports team name could possibly mean something like that, but, ew, why did I go and Google it.

I know, right? *shudders*

shopaholic

04-20-2007, 11:04 AM

I know, but it skeeves me so much... called getting your "name of the Detroit hockey team". 'Nuff said.

gag-o-riffic

isaacsmommy

04-20-2007, 11:13 AM

I will never be able to hear anything about Detroit now without their hockey team name coming to mind. BLECH!

maggieb

04-20-2007, 11:16 AM

While I was teaching fifth grade in Dallas around 1997, one of my students refused to sit in his chair and I asked him what was going on and he replied, "I can't sit down, Miss. I just took a dump and my hole hurts." I never thought I could be on the verge of anger and hilarious laughter at the same time.

My MIL has also shared with me details of her sex life and I finally got the courage and told her to stop, that I couldn't take it anymore.

hub1176

04-20-2007, 11:25 AM

LMAO here!

I used to work with a woman who would tell everyone about her sex life. One day she came in with brand new sneakers and announced that they were a gift from her BF for having anal - seriously. Even the Director knew of her new sneakers and how she had come by them.

Of course this was the same coworker who took a picture of her BF's member and e-mailed it to everyone at the office - way TMI (but I'll admit I was impressed :o )

Secret_Squirrel

04-20-2007, 11:28 AM

I will never be able to hear anything about Detroit now without their hockey team name coming to mind. BLECH!

Welcome to the club.

Ribbit

04-20-2007, 12:20 PM

LMAO here!

Of course this was the same coworker who took a picture of her BF's member and e-mailed it to everyone at the office - way TMI (but I'll admit I was impressed :o )

Good grief, this sounds like behavior that would get you fired in most jobs! :eek:

sparkle&shine

04-20-2007, 01:41 PM

MidwesternGal

04-20-2007, 01:48 PM

This is by far my new favorite thread!!!!!!!!!!

I cannot believe that this many people were born without internal censors!! Yikes!!!

phoenics

04-20-2007, 01:55 PM

If it was that impressive maybe she deserved those shoes ;)

LMAO! You are so bad!! :p

hub1176

04-20-2007, 03:22 PM

If it was that impressive maybe she deserved those shoes ;)

This made me remember - she had his name tattoed on her arm - she told us that even if they broke up his thing was so big that he deserved a spot on her arm :eek:

NotDesperate

04-20-2007, 03:36 PM

The things you can find on the internet! Piss-shivers (http://www.voltier.com/peeshiver/)

wow.... weird!

KaliLily

04-20-2007, 04:07 PM

I remember hearing a really juicy overshare in the bathroom on my floor of the dorm freshman year, but I can't remember what it was.

However, I do recall an overshare I heard several years ago in a downtown Seattle mall bathroom. The little girl in the stall next to me started singing, "Oops I did it again, I peed on my pants" over and over! I heard someone (I presume her mom or sister) trying to shush her from outside the stalls, but she just kept going. I stayed in my stall until they were gone because I didn't want to laugh in front of her. It was adorably hysterical! :D

KaliLily

04-20-2007, 04:09 PM

I used to work with a woman who would tell everyone about her sex life. One day she came in with brand new sneakers and announced that they were a gift from her BF for having anal - seriously. Even the Director knew of her new sneakers and how she had come by them.

Those better have been some seriously expensive sneakers! :p

ruby

04-21-2007, 06:49 AM

I have a great one, but still get grossed out when I think of it. I used to share an office with a male nurse and he was this short, fat, dopey, creepy guy who was full of TMI about his marriage, sex life, etc. His wife was almost in her 40s and they decided they wanted to start trying to conceive but at her age, she had never been to the GYNO and was really nervous about her upcoming appointment. So, gross male nurse decides to take home one of our metal vaginal specs to give her exam so "she would know what it would feel like" and proceeds to tell us all about his home exam!!:eek:He then brought the spec back to be re-sterilized. That image of them playing doctor is permanently etched in my brain. I was so angry at him, I felt violated.....ugh. Thank God I don't work with him anymore, I really didn't want to hear anymore details of babymaking and pregnancy!

Leilynne

04-21-2007, 09:03 AM

His wife was almost in her 40s and they decided they wanted to start trying to conceive but at her age, she had never been to the GYNO and was really nervous about her upcoming appointment. So, gross male nurse decides to take home one of our metal vaginal specs to give her exam so "she would know what it would feel like" and proceeds to tell us all about his home exam!!
I think that's actually a pretty nice thing to do for his wife, but I agree that sharing it at the work place is definatly TMI, she probably wouldn't have appreciated that all his co-workers knew about it.

honeygirl

04-21-2007, 08:30 PM

I was just in a Blockbuster and heard a overshare! I even told DH right after words that now I'd have something to post in this thread. ;)

Anyway, this young woman was looking at movies with her BF and talking VERY loudly on a cell phone to a friend. After a few minutes of chit chat she said "guess what we did in Macy's today", "no guess", "it was in the dressing room". She went on to say how they'd had sex! She also listed off the other stores that they'd "done it in" before. Talk about TMI!!

artist

04-23-2007, 08:54 PM

After my friend got married and then got pregnant right away, my friend's mom told me how worried she was (she wasn't real fond of her new son-in-law). One thing that she was worried about is that my friend's DH apparently only has one testicle. Um, okay. I did NOT need to know that! (She was so worried that my friend would have a son and he would have the same problem. My friend ended up having a daughter.)

Same person (friend's mom) once told me one of her hilarious stories about back in the day when she was in college. I guess once she and this guy were high and decided to have sex. She asked him to go get some sort of lubricant and he stupidly grabbed the Bengay! Yeah, bengay should NOT go THERE! (When she told me this story it really WAS TMI, but it had been an awful day for me and that story made me crack up laughing and forget that I was upset!)

The person who was my dorm roommate freshman year of college was nuts. She had some disgusting bowel movement problem and would call her parents long distance to tell them ALL about it in great detail. THEN she would try to tell me! Yuck! She also felt the need to be naked WAY too much and I think she worshipped her own body. THEN once she told me she had sex on MY bed so she could see herself in the mirror! Ick! I think that was about the time that I demanded to get a new roommate.

NotDesperate

04-23-2007, 09:11 PM

sublime311

04-23-2007, 09:41 PM

I went to a friend's dd's b-day party this weekend and was reminded of a really bad overshare.

This friend told me this story about her DH. He was in a restaurant's one room bathroom and had to uh.. go #2 (how old am I?) and midway through (ew) someone knocked on the door. So, he hurried to finish so he could get out. Well.... When he flushed, the toliet started to overflow and he didn't want the person who was waiting to know what had happened so he looked around the room to see what he could use to uh... solve the problem. He didn't find anything but remembered that he had a pencil in his pocket. He used the pencil to push and try to break apart the.. uh.. problem. Anyway, he fixed the problem and was so proud that he shared it with his wife who proceeded to share with me!

I sooooo didn't need to know that... Still to this day (which is why I remembered) his wife and I still call him "Lapizito" ('little pencil' in Spanish.)

kari

04-24-2007, 08:30 AM

My ex co-worker, as many of the people here has no internal sensor, came back from the rest room, walked into our office and proceeded to tell myself and another co-worker that she had started her period in her pants. Then, as if we didn't believe her, she turned around, bent over at the waist, spread her legs and pointed it out to us.

ahavnes

04-24-2007, 05:53 PM

My friend has a daughter in first grade. Apparently her daughter's teacher accidentally sent an email to all of the parents in the class saying that she had a really bad yeast infection from walking in warm weather. Embarassing! :eek:

Cricket4

04-24-2007, 07:50 PM

I can now participate!

Every Tuesday my volunteer group sings at nursing homes. Well, tonight I met a sweet little 93 year old gal who especially enjoyed our performance considering she used to be a dancer in vaudeville. Well, I was thrilled to meet her, since I used to be a performing myself.

She asked me how old I was, if I was married, then said "Well, I didn't get married until I was 28. And then, it took me 7 years to get pregnant. We had the hardest time, until one night I ate rabbit for dinner, then we did it on the floor! That's how I got pregnant!"

:D :o :eek: :D :p :cool:

She went on to tell me she wasn't sure if it was the rabbit or the floor that did it.

Kristeen

04-24-2007, 09:43 PM

OMG these are cracking me up! Mine aren't bad compared to some of these, but I'll share the overshares that come to mind.

MIL: Told me DH was conceived on Prom night (including details on how it had happened)

ME: :eek:

Mom: "Your father is going to have to lose some weight, it's like having sex with a pregnant woman!"

ME: :eek:

FIL: "It all turns into peter at night" while patting his pot belly and wiggling his eyebrows.

ME: :eek:

shimmerstar

04-25-2007, 10:07 AM

This is the best thread ever! Mine aren't so bad compared to some of yours.

I was in the restroom at the hospital, which had three stalls. I heard someone come in, and when I left the stall and started washing my hands, a woman said "oh, I didn't think there was anyone in here!". There was an old woman sitting on the toilet with the door wide open! I said "I'm sorry, do you want me to close your door?" and she said "no, that's alright. I'm just used to being at home, I guess". How hard is it to close the stall door?

When I left, her husband was waiting for her and he said "is she giving you a hard time in there?". Yeah.

The other one is from when I was 11. My mom is the worst oversharer I know, and one day she randomly came into the kitchen naked, and said "when you wear a tampon, the string hangs out like this". And showed me. I really didn't need the visual aide. I still want to die when I think about it.

shopaholic

04-25-2007, 10:30 AM

The other one is from when I was 11. My mom is the worst oversharer I know, and one day she randomly came into the kitchen naked, and said "when you wear a tampon, the string hangs out like this". And showed me. I really didn't need the visual aide. I still want to die when I think about it.OMFG!

kindermom

04-25-2007, 10:38 AM

AHammer

04-25-2007, 10:39 AM

omg shimmerstar!!!!!!! that's hysterical! one of the best stories so far :)

shimmerstar

04-25-2007, 12:19 PM

And see, I thought the one where the coworker pooped on her husband was better. I have been laughing about that for three days now. :eek:

michael'sbride

04-25-2007, 01:19 PM

I have two...

One coworker shared with me that she had an orgasm when her son's head crowned during childbirth. I was 7 months pregnant and she scarred me for life.

The second one was when a coworker shared that her husband has eczema on his penis. Yeah, I couldn't look at him again after learning that nugget of info.

jbenny75

04-25-2007, 04:40 PM

FIL: "It all turns into peter at night" while patting his pot belly and wiggling his eyebrows.

ME:

The other one is from when I was 11. My mom is the worst oversharer I know, and one day she randomly came into the kitchen naked, and said "when you wear a tampon, the string hangs out like this". And showed me. I really didn't need the visual aide. I still want to die when I think about it.

ROFLMAO!!!

JennW

04-25-2007, 05:05 PM

One coworker shared with me that she had an orgasm when her son's head crowned during childbirth.
This happened? I never heard of such a thing! And what a thing to share with a coworker, no less a pregnant one!!!

Katie&Micah

04-25-2007, 10:45 PM

This happened? I never heard of such a thing! And what a thing to share with a coworker, no less a pregnant one!!!

I read about this a few months ago and thought it was pretty darn strange..

Orgasmic childbirth (http://unassistedchildbirth.com/sensual/orgasmic.html)

Liz

04-27-2007, 12:21 AM

Asha

04-27-2007, 03:49 AM

shimmerstar - omg!! my mom was not shy in front of us either, but thankfully she never gave us a visual aid on what a tampon should look like inserted.

JennW

04-27-2007, 04:33 AM

I read about this a few months ago and thought it was pretty darn strange..

Orgasmic childbirth (http://unassistedchildbirth.com/sensual/orgasmic.html)
Wow. You truly do learn something new everyday. That is the most bizzarre thing I have ever read/seen.

Asha

04-27-2007, 05:11 AM

man, i would take an orgasmic childbirth if it helps lessen any of that pain. maybe, i should rethink an epidural bc otherwise i might not feel the orgasm. :) i don't think its that strange considering that i have read that some women experience orgasms during breastfeeding too. its just not something i would share to others if it happened to me.

sue-bert

04-27-2007, 08:15 AM

An old friend of DH's told us we just had to try licking each others a$$holes because it gave you a zing just like when you lick a screen door! Yummy!
I never knew that licking a screen door gives you a "zing." And if so, wouldn't it be easier to just lick a screen door???

kmack

04-27-2007, 10:51 AM

OMG i just found this thread and am dying laughing!! unfortunately i have some to share:

when i was in middle school our next door neighbor was really creepy and disgusting...one day while my brother and i were outside he found it necessary to tell us that he won't have sex with his wife anymore b/c her 'vagina hangs out' b/c she has had too many kids....:eek:

another time my friend and i were getting into the elevator in her apartment building with her dog. a young woman gets in after us and the dog starts sniffing her so my friend apologized. the woman said 'that's okay, he's probably just doing it b/c he can tell i am having my period'...

lastly, a co-worker of mine was notorious for oversharing. my boss would tell me that whenever he would call into work sick he would have to go into detail about what exactly was ailing him. well after one particulary long sickness he came into my office when he got back and told me all about the boil that he had in his 'private area' and that he and his wife weren't able to have sex for a week b/c of it - so she tried to pop it for him but apparently it didn't work....i want to puke just thinking about this story again...

salysaturn

05-09-2007, 04:41 PM

A neighbor and I started talking about our outrageous water bill for an apartment. I told him how we were doing laundry maybe once a week, and he told me since their new dog ate almost all his girlfriend's undies, she was just down to 2 pairs and was doing wash almost daily...and she was out at that moment at VS buying new undies.

Katie&Micah

05-09-2007, 06:55 PM

he told me since their new dog ate almost all his girlfriend's undies
bleck! gross!!

phoenics

05-09-2007, 08:09 PM

phoenics

05-09-2007, 08:10 PM

I have two...

One coworker shared with me that she had an orgasm when her son's head crowned during childbirth.

Seriously, people need to keep stuff like this to themselves.

greenbunny

06-07-2007, 02:03 PM

One of my coworkers overshared today that he was once treated for crabs. :eek: I was telling him that I'm allergic to crabmeat, and he ran away with it.

yby1

06-07-2007, 02:39 PM

Once, I was chitchatting with my former boss and another co-worker about our commutes after a meeting.

She told us that since she has a really long commute, she liked to have fun by taking off her pants so that the truckers could see her "down there." If she noticed that they were looking, she would put on a "show."

That's putting it nicely, she was much more crude when telling her story. Then she told us that she liked to walk around her house naked with the windows open. My coworker and I sat there with this look of disbelief, but we were both trying to disguise it until she left. Then we were like OMG. It was like a nightmare - you never want to hear anything like that from your boss. She got fired not long after that. I think she got too stressed out and lost it.

That's the worst overshare I've ever experienced.

princesse

06-07-2007, 03:58 PM

ROTFLMAOPIMP! Ewwww *snort* Ewwwwwwwwwwww *laughs* Ewwwwww *snort* *choke* *sputters*

I cannot stop laughing!

Ahhhh, the SHART. I had a teacher at school who you could never ask "how are you?" because she would TELL you and it usually included something like this!

mel7dog

06-07-2007, 05:20 PM

jbenny75

06-07-2007, 05:30 PM

It's so funny that this thread is bumped up today because I had another bad one today!

I was at the hairstylist getting my roots done. She put all of the gook on my head, then I had to wait for a little while. She informed me that she was going to run to the bathroom because she thought she was getting a stomach bug....we all know what that means! OVERSHARE!

shopaholic

06-07-2007, 05:49 PM

One of my coworkers overshared today that he was once treated for crabs. :eek: I was telling him that I'm allergic to crabmeat, and he ran away with it.

you work in a truly unique environment

greenbunny

06-07-2007, 06:19 PM

you work in a truly unique environment

I swear you have to fail a psych test to work here. :p Since I've been here, we've had two employees go to jail.

JennW

06-08-2007, 04:40 AM

I'm so happy this thread got bumped up. It never fails to entertain!:)

kari

06-08-2007, 07:45 AM

Got another one:
My co-worker was brand new. It was after lunch and myself and another co-worker were talking at my desk. New co-worker comes walks in and I politely asked her how her lunch was. Her response: "It was great, I went home and got f$%&ed." :eek:

JennW

06-08-2007, 07:58 AM

Jen B.

06-08-2007, 10:04 AM

These are hilarious!!! I can only think of 1 right now. Its not nearly as crazy as some of these are. But my boss used to tell us everytime he was going to take a dump. He'd wave the newspaper at us and would say "you know where I'll be!" Gee thanks for sharing! :rolleyes: Or he'd say "I'll be in dispose"

hub1176

06-08-2007, 10:09 AM

He'd wave the newspaper at us and would say "you know where I'll be!" Gee thanks for sharing! Or he'd say "I'll be in dispose"

Ughh! Why do people feel the need to let everyone know that they are going to the bathroom! I used to work with a woman who would come out spraying air freshner and announcing "Do NOT go in there" (Like Jim Carrey)

jimmysgirl424

06-08-2007, 10:22 AM

Ughh! Why do people feel the need to let everyone know that they are going to the bathroom! I used to work with a woman who would come out spraying air freshner and announcing "Do NOT go in there" (Like Jim Carrey)

DH took it one step further a few weeks ago and told me about a multi-shaded turd that freaked him out when he looked into the toliet after he was done. (gee hon, thanks ever so much for sharing...although I will admit that I laughed till I cried when he told me.)

Jen B.

06-08-2007, 10:29 AM

My DH tells me all the time about his "massive $_its" at least twice a week. Than likes to describe the shape and size.EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

yby1

06-08-2007, 10:31 AM

DH took it one step further a few weeks ago and told me about a multi-shaded turd that freaked him out when he looked into the toliet after he was done. (gee hon, thanks ever so much for sharing...although I will admit that I laughed till I cried when he told me.)

We love to talk about turds here in our house, just amongst ourselves. My poop, Dh's poop, DS's poop, our dog's poop. It's hilarous *to us.* :) I would never share that with anyone else.

jimmysgirl424

06-08-2007, 11:08 AM

We love to talk about turds here in our house, just amongst ourselves. My poop, Dh's poop, DS's poop, our dog's poop. It's hilarous *to us.* :) I would never share that with anyone else.

Hmmm...I just can't imagine walking out of the bathroom and discussing the outcome of my visit with DH. He, on the other hand, regularly informs me of his! I wonder if all that will change once our DC is born?

yby1

06-08-2007, 11:18 AM

LOL! I don't talk about mine much at all - I did quite a bit though when I was pregnant and the first couple of weeks postpartum. :) We mainly talk about DS's and the dogs poop. We can have long conversations about those two. ;) DH also loves to give constant updates.

shopaholic

06-08-2007, 11:29 AM

yby1

06-08-2007, 11:42 AM

So do we. I don't see a big deal with it ::shrugs::

I don't think it's a big deal at all. But I don't think that line of conversation is OK for a co-worker. I like my co-workers. :)

MichelleRenee

06-08-2007, 11:52 AM

DH has a friend who is notorious for oversharing. He came to one of our family cookouts (uninvited) and proceeded to tell everyone about sex with his pregnant girlfriend. His exact words:

"Once I could feel the baby kicking my belly from inside her belly we had to start doing it doggy-style."

And this was in a house filled with kids, DH's parents and his grandparents.

shopaholic

06-08-2007, 12:07 PM

I don't think it's a big deal at all. But I don't think that line of conversation is OK for a co-worker. I like my co-workers. :)

I guess I should have been overly detailed and said I didn't think it was a big deal at home. With co-workers...forget about it. Although last week we did have a convo about colonscopies which I didn't feel like was a huge deal.

yby1

06-08-2007, 01:32 PM

I guess I should have been overly detailed and said I didn't think it was a big deal at home. With co-workers...forget about it. Although last week we did have a convo about colonscopies which I didn't feel like was a huge deal.

colonoscopy - differernt story. I will talk about those since my Dad has colon cancer.

greenbunny

06-08-2007, 01:56 PM

Poop conversations are all about context. Within immediate family -- not a biggie. Group of parents comparing notes -- no biggie. Random coworker you barely know -- biggie. If it is approached from a medical angle, versus "Dude, check out my giant corn shit!" then that's no biggie either. All IMO, of course.

Damn, I need the poop forum.

AmandaLeigh

06-09-2007, 06:44 AM

A former co-worker came in and proceeded to show me the rash she had on her stomache and went on to explain that she had gotten it when she and her boyfriend had decided to experiment with whipped cream. I really did not need to know that, especially since her boyfriend worked with me at my other job.

imagirliegirl

06-09-2007, 07:47 AM

I hesitated to post this because it's so nasty but what the hell.

I was hanging out with a good friend once and some of his guy friends were there. Somehow (I can't imagine how) the topic turned to sex. One of his friends decided to let us all know that he LOVED to um...go down...on girls who were on their period.

I seriously almost vomited. Who talks about crap like that?! Even if you're around friends! That is by far the worst thing I ever heard. :eek:

Foley42

06-09-2007, 08:24 AM

My DH tells me all the time about his "massive $_its" at least twice a week. Than likes to describe the shape and size.EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
Uh huh, this is my DH too. I just roll my eyes :rolleyes:

We keep each other updated about our dog's poop too. Color, amount, consistency :)

violetxflutterby

06-09-2007, 05:52 PM

I was hanging out with a good friend once and some of his guy friends were there. Somehow (I can't imagine how) the topic turned to sex. One of his friends decided to let us all know that he LOVED to um...go down...on girls who were on their period.

I used to have a friend like that. You don't even want to know what he described that as

Standrea

06-09-2007, 09:37 PM

I was hanging out with a good friend once and some of his guy friends were there. Somehow (I can't imagine how) the topic turned to sex. One of his friends decided to let us all know that he LOVED to um...go down...on girls who were on their period.

DH's fraternity called it "getting your red wings"...completely nasty and disgusting. Who would even *want* to own up to that??:rolleyes:

Worst overshare I've heard to date-i was at a sex toy party last night, and the woman was telling us what all the directors like...She proceeded to tell us what worked best for her!

LIZNKEITH

09-05-2007, 10:20 AM

Had to bump up this thread to share this little gem with you girls.

Yesterday morning a coworker and I were sitting in my cubicle chatting about the long weekend, etc. when another coworker walked and proceeded to share a story that will be forever burned into my brain.

She begins to tell us about a situation that happened to her last week. She was on her way home from work and was about half way there so decided it would be safe to open her bottle of water. Figuring she’d be home before it hit her bladder, ya know? As luck would have it, she hit traffic on a stretch of road where there is apparently no stores or anything. Suddenly, she felt the urge to go. I guess she was sitting there for a while because the urge became overwhelming. At this point, I groan a sympathetic “Oh no” thinking she had to break down and crawl off in the woods somewhere to go. Nope, the story would not be traumatic enough.

She proceeds to tell coworker and I that she looked in the backseat and saw a comforter she normally lays out for her dog. In a moment of desperation, she puts the comforter underneath her and pees in to it!! I mean, right down to oversharing the fact that she was pressing on her stomach to make sure all of the urine was out of her bladder. My other co worker could see the horror on my face and just pointed and laughed at me. Neither of us could figure out why she was telling us this story. She’s not what I would really consider a friend if you know what I mean. Not to mention, if you had to do something like that would you tell anyone? It would go to my grave with me.

I’m traumatized. Really.

violetxflutterby

09-05-2007, 10:23 AM

She proceeds to tell coworker and I that she looked in the backseat and saw a comforter she normally lays out for her dog. In a moment of desperation, she puts the comforter underneath her and pees in to it!! I mean, right down to oversharing the fact that she was pressing on her stomach to make sure all of the urine was out of her bladder. My other co worker could see the horror on my face and just pointed and laughed at me. Neither of us could figure out why she was telling us this story. She’s not what I would really consider a friend if you know what I mean. Not to mention, if you had to do something like that would you tell anyone? It would go to my grave with me.

wow that's really disgusting. I can't believe 1) that she did that 2) shared it with people! :eek::confused:

katmg

09-05-2007, 11:25 AM

Um, even when I was pregnant I never had to pee so bad in traffic that I just went?! How long is her commute - 4 hours?? And what's with pushing on her stomach to get all the urine out - I've NEVER done that. WTH? Does she have medical issues?

Dear lord, what makes people share this kind of stuff??!

LIZNKEITH

09-05-2007, 12:45 PM

katmg,
I wish...no medical issues to speak of (I feel fairly certain she would have shared them with us if there were any. I mean, you're already disclosing extremely personal information. Why not?) and her commute is only about 30-40 minutes tops.

Katie&Micah

09-05-2007, 01:05 PM

Wow.. Maybe your office should chip in and buy her one of these (http://www.comforthouse.com/porjoh.html)..

phoenics

09-05-2007, 06:00 PM

She should have taken a lesson from that NASA woman.

:D

Weddings by

09-07-2007, 11:59 PM

...if you had to do something like that would you tell anyone?

I know! I had a person tell me that one night she had diarrhea that she couldn't hold in. She said that she was extremely sick and didn't want to get up, so she just wiped her rear with the comforter and wrapped herself in the clean part of it then went back to sleep.

phoenics

09-08-2007, 12:32 AM

I know! I had a person tell me that one night she had diarrhea that she couldn't hold in. She said that she was extremely sick and didn't want to get up, so she just wiped her rear with the comforter and wrapped herself in the clean part of it then went back to sleep.

:eek:

zhannushka

09-08-2007, 09:54 AM

I have this friend (she's now a very close friend and I don't mind her telling me personal stuff), but - we met at work, about 7 years ago and barely even knew each other. At one point the two of us had to work the late shift together, just the two of us, so - she would tell me absolutely everything that went on in her life - from getting her period to giving a blow job to her boyfriend to having diarrhea. I used to think that it was too much info and really gross, but then little by little I got used to her and we ended up becoming best friends. I still joke with her, to this day, that she traumatized me with some of her stories back then. :D

Weddings by

09-09-2007, 11:39 PM

I forgot to thank LIZNKEITH for reminding me of the diarrhea incident. I had completely forgotten about it.

Standrea

09-10-2007, 04:13 AM

I worked with this woman (Mid 20's at the time), that was a little "Rough around the edges". She was the queen of over shares. One morning we were all sitting around one of the girls desks (Including our boss's, who were all 50+ and male) just chatting away. THis chick comes out of nowhere and says "I really like the taste of my own<insert vulgar word for vagina>". "Whenever X <insert vulgar word about going south>, I like to lick his beard after."/

That was disgusting. She was nasty, and totally the worst mental picture I've had ever.

Goddess Tiff

09-10-2007, 11:01 AM

Oh, that is gross. :eek:

Kimberland30

09-10-2007, 03:45 PM

OKay, that is the worst thing I've heard in a while. I mean, *gah*.

My neighbor has a friend who overshares EVERYTHING about her personal life (similar to what Standrea posted). Whenever our neigbors have a GTG and this particular woman is there, we skip it. We love hanging out with our neighbors and we aren't prude by any means, but I really don't need to hear about how she got "crotch rot" from a pool and all her other business, KWIM? And she's loud, so we can't even sit in our OWN backyard when this woman is next door because we still hear all about her personal life.

She's just a nasty b*tch and loves to shock people by her vulgarity. Classy chick, lemme tell ya.

PG-rated

09-10-2007, 04:30 PM

I keep meaning to post one that just happened to me this summer: I was in a Jewish wedding, and after the ceremony the bride and groom took their traditional time alone together in a room just off the reception area. The next morning, the bride told me how she couldn't believe that so many people were offended when they found out that she and her new DH had consummated the marriage during that time. :eek: My thoughts:
1. Um, if you go around telling everyone your personal business, some of them are bound to think they have the right to an opinion about it.
2. Are you sure they weren't just offended that you TOLD them about it?