when do kids start getting "picky" about their clothes?

[pixielou]

my dd is only 2.5, but already she is showing signs of clothes pickiness. if she had her way, she would be wearing her green corduroys every day and her pink nightgown every night. i try to give her limited choices of what to wear - do you want to wear your pink shirt or purple shirt? but quite often she'll walk over to her closet and pull out something entirely different. like this morning, she pulled out last years christmas dress!

so is this a phase that she is going thru - normal toddler trying to show independence? or is this the beginning of "i need stretch flare leg jeans with hoodie sweatshirts that say aeropostale and do'nt you dare buy my shoes at payless"?

i try to hit all the clearance sales to stock up on clothes in the next size up - and i just don't want to keep buying things if she is already becoming a picky fahionista.

~pixie

[LeighW]

My DD has chosen her own clothes since she was about 22 months.

Now, she' almost 4, and I don't even buy clothes for her unless she is right there with me in the store, or looking at the monitor if we're shopping online. Even then, we try things on multiple times before I remove the tags and actually wash them.

Forget buying ahead, on sale, etc. I've been burned too many times. Many, many cute (and expensive!) outfits hanging in her closet, completely unworn. Even the ones that are just like another *favorite* outfit.

I would have enjoyed dressing her more when she was an infant, if I had realized how quickly that phase would be over!

So, the answer is, my DD is a fashionista.

For your sake, I'll hope it's just a phase.

ETA: giving my DD choices of two outfits never worked. She'd just choose something completely different. Now, I make sure what she's wearing is weather and event-appropriate (using those terms loosely). Forget matching. And wait until your DD wants to put in hair accessories all by herself!

[Goodies]

My DD was around two when she got picky with the shoes she wore. She won't leave the house until she gets the shoes she wants on. Really annoying because she like these bright blue shoes that didn't match with everything.

[Winter Biscuit]

so is this a phase that she is going thru - normal toddler trying to show independence? or is this the beginning of "i need stretch flare leg jeans with hoodie sweatshirts that say aeropostale and do'nt you dare buy my shoes at payless"?

I am going to say it's a phase - normal toddler behavior.

My DD started doing the same thing when she was around the same age (2.5). Some days I'd ask her if she wanted to wear her pink shirt or her purple shirt, and she'd say "I want to wear my YELLOW one." It was like I just couldn't win. She turned 3 in December and often chooses mismatched outfits or insists on wearing things that I never would have chosen. Her latest thing is that she wants to wear her black velvet Christmas dress ALL the time, never mind the fact that it's spring now, it's 70 degrees outside (and thus too warm to wear such a thick wintery dress), and she has a very cute Easter dress that is perfect for spring!

FWIW, my DD is not picky about what we actually buy her (yet). She's only selective about what she actually wears. Most days I just go with the flow, but there are some times (e.g. family portraits, or when it's way too cold to go outside in a sleeveless shirt) when I just have to draw the line and tell her that she has to choose between outfit A and outfit B (and no, outfit C is NOT an option). I think the key is to try not to get embarrassed if you venture out in public with an "interesting" outfit on, remember that "this too shall pass" and keep in mind that someday they'll actually match AND wear clothes that are in-season! ;)

[mamax2]

so is this a phase that she is going thru - normal toddler trying to show independence? or is this the beginning of "i need stretch flare leg jeans with hoodie sweatshirts that say aeropostale and do'nt you dare buy my shoes at payless"?
I think it's somewhere between the two ;)

My DD started this 'phase' about a year ago (age 2.5) and well, we're still in it. It has varying degrees though. Some days she's totally content to let me (or her 15 m.o. sister, the dog, etc.) pick her outfit, other days, she's very determined. I still buy some things ahead, but only basics and I make sure DD 'approves' the items. DD is also more accepting of clothes that OTHER people buy for her. For instance, anything from Nana or Grammy is o.k. :rolleyes:

I've had the most success with giving her free reign (within weather/event appropriate limits) of her closet. She knows she has to wear a dress to Church and usually to parties, but other than that, whatever is in there is acceptable for every day wear.

[Kay]

I have two boys so my experience is different. My oldest just turned 12:eek: He really didn't start caring what he wore until he was around 8 and even then it was just certain things he didn't want to wear otherwise he didn't care. He is now of course very concerned with what he wears.

My youngest is 4 and he just cares if his pants has pockets. He loves putting things in his pockets. Sometimes he will show a preference for a certain shirt or pant but for the most part will wear anything...as long as it has pockets.

[blondegirl]

It only gets worse as they get older!! DD1 is almost 8, and boy oh boy is she a little fashionista. I can't buy her anything without her there, and when she is in the store w/ me, she is oh so picky!!

Luckily, DD2 (25 months) isn't quite that bad yet. I give her a choice of outfits and shoes and for the most part that works fine. We have had a few occasions where I wouldn't let her wear something that wasn't weather appropriate, and she threw a fit. I now let her wear somethings I wouldn't normally let her wear if she really wants to, just to save my sanity!

[Sarah]

I think it's not a stage. I mean, her being really upset about it might be a stage, but my dd started being picky near 2ish, and still has strong opinions about clothes at near 5.

[SiValleySteph]

My son (yes, SON, I don't buy into all the gender differences) has had distinct opinions about his clothes since before he was 2. He's 2.5 now and he picks out his own clothes most days. I have some influence, but not much. I don't expect it to change. I do try and encourage him to wear a t-shirt underneath if it's cold, not to wear lined pants if it's warm, that sort of thing.

[dziner]

My DD (3) is totally controlling about her clothes, and that's okay...I just wish she would realize that multiple prints are NOT attractive. And that you don't need seven barrettes at one time. Queen of excess!!!

Her favorite "ballerina princess queen" outfit that she asks for every day consists of tights, a leotard with floaty skirt, hula skirt over that, cardboard/tin foil crown, selection of Mardi Gras beads, and fairy wand. She wore it under her snowsuit when there was a blizzard. She'll wear it OVER regular clothes.

[jki]

LOL, dziner.

Both of my kids started developing opinions about their clothes at 18 mos. DS is not a fashionisto - he just insists on wearing clothes with trucks or fire engines on them. :rolleyes:

DD sort of becomes obsessed with certain articles of clothing.... like her rain boots. She had to wear them all day, every day for MONTHS (even in the house) - DH finally hid them in the garage because he was so sick of them. She also insists on wearing this winter hat - even when it's 80 degrees out. I just let her and let the logical consequence of her getting hot to tell her to take the thing off.

Clothing is one battle I choose not to fight.

[MizLarner]

The most I hear from my 2 year old is when I've grabbed something that he didn't feel like wearing that day. Sometimes I get something else, sometimes I put it on him anyway. Half the time it's not so much the particular clothes item as it is that it is clothes, period ;)

My almost-8 DSS hasn't expressed any real fashion preferences, other than that he really doesn't care for wearing jean shorts.

[Renrel]

My 3.5 yr old can be picky but it more about comfort than fashion. He likes elastic waists not zipper flys. He does not like the stiffness of jeans. He also lately complains if a shirt has buttons because he can't do buttons himself, even if there are only 2-3 buttons at the neck. He does occassionally get hooked on wearing his favorite color (green) or want to wear his pj top to school. I give in if there is no good reason not to. It does not matter to me if he looks silly, just that he is warm or cool and dry enough and that his coat will fit over his shirt when I have to get it on him. We also have some argument about shoes v.s. boots, since I would rather not have to take the extra minute to change shoes at school, but again I would problably save myself time letting him just wear the boots.

He does like clothes though, much to my suprise. He will get excited about gifts of clothes and like to wear things he got a a gift. As a kid I hated getting clothes as a gift. I wanted toys, toys, toys. I am still not much of a cloths girl today. I enjoy buying a few nice outfits a year but I am still wearing clothes I bought 10 yr ago.

[bluebunny]

My son started picking out his clothes at 18 months. He is particular about what he wears, down to his socks. I'd like to think it's normal toddler behavior but I have a feeling this will stick around.

I can relate to these comments:

Clothing is one battle I choose not to fight.

My son (yes, SON, I don't buy into all the gender differences) has had distinct opinions about his clothes since before he was 2. He's 2.5 now and he picks out his own clothes most days. I have some influence, but not much. I don't expect it to change. I do try and encourage him to wear a t-shirt underneath if it's cold, not to wear lined pants if it's warm, that sort of thing.

Forget buying ahead, on sale, etc. I've been burned too many times. Many, many cute (and expensive!) outfits hanging in her closet, completely unworn. Even the ones that are just like another *favorite* outfit.



When my parents kept DS overnight while we were at the hospital having DD, my mom told me she was shocked at how full his closet was. She said that she had seen him in the same few things over and over and didn't dream that he had so many options. :rolleyes:

[LyLMyssChaos]

My DD has chosen her own clothes since she was about 22 months.

Now, she' almost 4, and I don't even buy clothes for her unless she is right there with me in the store, or looking at the monitor if we're shopping online. Even then, we try things on multiple times before I remove the tags and actually wash them.

Forget buying ahead, on sale, etc. I've been burned too many times. Many, many cute (and expensive!) outfits hanging in her closet, completely unworn. Even the ones that are just like another *favorite* outfit.

I would have enjoyed dressing her more when she was an infant, if I had realized how quickly that phase would be over!

So, the answer is, my DD is a fashionista.

For your sake, I'll hope it's just a phase.

ETA: giving my DD choices of two outfits never worked. She'd just choose something completely different. Now, I make sure what she's wearing is weather and event-appropriate (using those terms loosely). Forget matching. And wait until your DD wants to put in hair accessories all by herself!


Sounds like our daughters are VERY much alike. I gave up buying clothes for my DD (who will be 4 in July) when she was about 2. If she didn't pick it out? She simply will not wear it. We have found that by letting her choose her own clothing, she gets dressed without issue. If we try to force her to wear something she doesn't want? Well, let's just say, we have a blossoming Diva on our hands.

[cr8zyforaf]

DD has started to want to choose her clothing at 18 months..and she becomes obsessed with certain things - like now, all she wants to wear is this horrible orange tshirt from TCP with something like 'human beat box' and a bunch of dancing music notes...it is awful. She won't put her arms up for me to take it off of her. As soon as she gets out of the tub, she runs to get her shirt. A few weeks ago, it was her snow boots.

It isn't worth the argument to me - as long as it is some what weather and event appropriate, I am fine with it.

I know I am not alone - one girl at daycare has come in many times with her princess nightgown over her clothes.

[Sarah]

My DD is picky but I won't let her have the ultimate decision. We are on a really limited budget and buy most of their clothes at thrift stores, so she must wear what I buy. I try to keep her preferences and comfort in mind, but when she just hates something I bought I usually tell her she can wear it or not go out at all (because she'll be naked). I don't argue or "fight a battle" I just dont have the luxury of offering tons of choices.

[Peever]

It's not a phase for us. I don't remember when it started, but my son has been picky about clothes for a long time. He's 3 now. I used to buy in advance when things were on clearance, but he's got tons of nice clothes now that he's never worn so I've stopped doing that now.

Part of the problem is just that he's a spirited child and he has issues with change. He has had real problems with the changing of the seasons and having to go from jeans and long sleeved shirts to shorts and t-shirts. Switching shoes and coats has been hard for him too.

I try not to get into clothing battles, but I'm not going to let him wear the same shirt every day either. Shirts are our biggest argument. He's not nearly as fussy about pants or pjs. When he was younger, I'd just give him the choice of 2 outfits and that did the trick until he was about 2 and then he had to pick out everything himself. Even that doesn't please him half the time. I do laundry and I won't put his clean shirts in his drawer until it's almost empty so it forces him to pick new shirts so he's not so stuck on one of them. I give him a couple of tries in the morning to pick out his outfit and if he doesn't cooperate then I get to pick it out for him. If he throws a fit, he gets a time out. That's just how it works.

Sarah- FWIW, my son loves the $3 shirts I got him at Kmart or the $4 shirts I got him at Kohls a million times more than his Gymboree shirts.

[KathleenMichaela]

My daughter started getting diva-ish about her clothes shortly before she turned 2. She was the queen of clash until I started filtering her wardrobe. Since she was sprinting through sizes I made the decision that pants and skirts were solid colors and shirts were patterned. It eliminated the "wow that outfit is loud" disasters hastily. She also is very girlie so the color palate was easy - pinks, purples, whites, and soft blues.

Now that she's older she's definately picked up clues from fashion and her friends what works together and what doesn't. I still have the final say though... No halters, belly baring, low-rise, super short or super tight on my girl! Knowing that Mama has clear cut rules and always has eliminates a lot of potential drama.

[pixielou]

thanks for all the responses. we're in the process of moving now. in the new house, dd's closet will be much smaller - so i will only have clothes that currently fit her and are in season in the closet in her room. so i'm hoping that will help with some of the daily battles. i try not to battle the clothes too much - i just do lots of smiling and say "yes, she chose her own clothes today."

more specific question - when do girls start refusing to wear dresses? it seems like as preschoolers, the glitzier the better. but at some poine they usually hit the stage where they want their jeans and no more dresses. when does that happen?

~pixie

[ellybelle]

more specific question - when do girls start refusing to wear dresses? it seems like as preschoolers, the glitzier the better. but at some poine they usually hit the stage where they want their jeans and no more dresses. when does that happen?

I don't know, but it can't come soon enough around here....our 3 1/2 year old will ONLY wear dresses or skirts most of the time. We do the dress/pants combination at times (often with dresses from the previous year that are too short, but not too small around her chest).

I've just stopped buying pants and shorts, figuring that we can use the hand-me-downs if she changes her mind, and buy dresses at Costco and Target.

[Peever]

My niece is 6 and she still loves dresses. I think she was 5 before she agreed to wear jeans. She still wears dresses 85% of the time. She sometimes wears jeans or leggings under her skirts if it's cold outside.

[chandy]

My daughter will also only wear "princess" dresses or "twirly" skirts. Luckily she isn't too picky and will wear anything that is a dress or skirt. But pants and shorts are a sure-fire way to get a tantrum started. She even wears a little ballet skirt over her pjs at night. I hope it is just a phase!

I'm a little bummed to hear about all of these picky boys...I was hoping it was just a girl thing and getting dressed would be easier with my son. I can still hope though!

[KathleenMichaela]

My Anna starting easing away from the dresses-all-the-time phase when she started school. It's a lot easier to run and play and sit on the floor in pants! Of course, the pants that had the best chance of being worn were pretty colors, embroidered, jeweled or, in some way or another, embellished.

Now though, being 10, she's definately lower maintance. Her favorite everyday outfit is a pair of blue jeans, "cute" shoes and whichever shirt appeals at the moment with matching accessories (earrings, necklace, hair doo-dads). She definately has girlie-girl moments still though, when we were planning for Easter she asked if she could do "full-on girlie"... Dress, tights, new shoes, bonnet, the whole thing!

P.S. Oh, and my boys for Easter... Full suits, ties they picked themselves, new shoes and fresh haircuts. All of their own choosing!

[lady1297]

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My son (yes, SON, I don't buy into all the gender differences) has had distinct opinions about his clothes since before he was 2. He's 2.5 now and he picks out his own clothes most days. I have some influence, but not much. I don't expect it to change. I do try and encourage him to wear a t-shirt underneath if it's cold, not to wear lined pants if it's warm, that sort of thing.


THis is my son. We are going through a battle right now as we switch from winter to summer clothes. I see it mostly with his church outfits, though. He hates his saddle shoes (too big he tells me) won't wear his winter sweaters or his spring dress clothes either...this morning was a screaming match on his part over wearing his shoes to church...That's when I resorted to Sarah's opinion:

My DD is picky but I won't let her have the ultimate decision. We are on a really limited budget and buy most of their clothes at thrift stores, so she must wear what I buy. I try to keep her preferences and comfort in mind, but when she just hates something I bought I usually tell her she can wear it or not go out at all (because she'll be naked). I don't argue or "fight a battle" I just dont have the luxury of offering tons of choices.

We are starting the natural consequence that if he does not dress appropriately he will not get to go anywhere. If he choses to be in PJ"s all day, we can't take the dog for a walk. Simple. If he won't put on his shoes that he deems "Too big" (which applies to anything he doesn't want to wear), then he doesn't go to church with me, I go alone. He's learning quickly to get dressed when I ask him to and to dress appropriately. Otherwise, we give him the choice of what to wear.