Potty-Mouth

[mamax2]

O.k., my 3.5 y.o. DD has taken to over-using 'poopy' 'pee pee' and now sometimes 'puke' (I don't even know where she heard that one, but whatever). She doesn't do this in public, only at home, so I know she gets that it's inappropriate on some level. It's non-stop, she's calling me, DH, her sister, the dog, her baby dolls, etc. some potty-mouthed name. Sometimes it's just part of her nonsense kind of talk which used to be mainly made-up words, but now all potty words.

I've told her I don't like the words. I've told her it's not nice for a little girl to talk this way. I've tried incentives (tonight was watching TV while I put her sister to bed if she could make it from dinner to bedtime w/out potty words).

Anyway, I'm at my wits end - help!

[Winter Biscuit]

At my DD's daycare, the word of choice is "booty." Booty butt, to be precise. One of the kid's parents actually introduced it (he called his kid "booty butt" - don't ask :confused: :rolleyes: ) - and now as a result of his brilliant parenting, several kids use "booty butt" as a type of swear word or derogatory name for someone they are frustrated with.

DD's teacher immediately let the kids know that the phrase is not appropriate or acceptable. If/when anyone utters it, they get a reminder that it's not acceptable and she gives them suggestions for what they CAN say and helps them find other ways to express whatever she thought they wanted to express (e.g. frustration). That probably won't help in your situation though, but I still wanted to throw that out in case anyone else is reading along and looking for ideas.

It sounds like your DD is calling you a potty name instead of using your actual name? Is that right? Or is it more like, "You are a (insert potty word)? If it's the former, have you tried reminding her that your name is Mama (or whatever you go by - Mommy, Mom, etc.) and that if she wants to speak to you, she will need to call you by your name. Then ignore her if she addresses you as Poopy (or whatever) but acknowledge her anytime she uses your correct name.

Sometimes I think kids that age intentionally try to manipulate the parents by pushing their buttons, and the more you react to it, the more satisfaction they get. That's why I wonder if ignoring it or not making a big deal out of it might help? I have no idea - I'm new to this myself! :p

[jay&erinn]

My DD (also 3.5) just started this the other day- her choice words are poop and diahhrea. I told her that it wasn't nice. She told me that it makes the other kids laugh (she goes to a babysitter for a few hours a week). I told her I didn't think it was very nice or very funny at all and that they only place those words are appropriate are in the bathroom. I also told her that if I hear her using those words I will assume she has to go potty and she has to immediately leave whatever she is doing and go try and go potty. So far this has worked well- mainly because she absolutely hates being made to do anything that isn't her idea. Hopefully it continues to work.

[Renrel]

For what it is worth I think that potty humor is just part of being a 3-4 year old. They know that it is taboo and that makes it powerful and funny. At DS preschool they are taught that those words are only appropriate to use when you are in the bathroom. Which caused DS to use the words when he is in the bathroom, just because he can, even if he really does not have anything important to say about pee or poop. Then he started saying them quietly in other places, under his breath, with a silly smile/look on his face that means, aren't I funny mommy. I just tell him that the words in not a word we use at the table or whereever and ingnore it. If there is no reaction the fun/humor goes away pretty fast I think. But DS has not started with name calling and potty words, so I really don't have any experience with that...yet.

[mamax2]

Thanks everyone! I know it's totally age-appropriate behavior, but I think it's Mom-appropriate to try and stop it :p

DD definitely isn't using these words in a malicious way. She just thinks it's funny, like: "Hey Pee-pee [aka: ME], Poopy called and wants Pee-pee to poopy and pukey later" [hysterical laughter]. "Baby is a Poopy Pee-pee face!" "Come here pukey poopy!".

I'll try ignoring. I'm not too good at that one :)

[pixielou]

not sure if this would work or not. . .but my cousin has a 3.5 yo daughter who just loves to run around naked. so my cousin has set up a rule that the daughter can run around naked in her own room until her heart is content, but she has to be properly dressed to leave her room. so maybe you could tell your dd that if she wants to use potty words, she can do it in her own room, but as soon as she leaves her room, she must use appropriate language?

~pixie