Question: A tale of two dogs

[sublime311]

We have two dogs, Luna and Raven, and include both dogs on outings such as neighborhood walks, short hiking trips, and dog park trips. Raven (a black lab X) is VERY shy and nervous of new sounds and people, but is INCREDIBLY sweet, gentle, and loving with us. We believe the previous owner may have hit her (like with a newspaper, or something) because a) she's afraid and barks at men that have a certain look and b) she winces even when we just playfully "spank" (pat?) her bottom. We've occasionally had trouble with her at the dog park where she'll "hunt" another dog and then charge at them to get the dog to run. We *think* she's playing, but obviously, this comes off as aggressive to the other dog and owner. Raven is VERY leash aggressive, too. She'll pull, lunge, growl, and bark at anybody who comes within 20 feet of us. Fear drives her aggression - we're working on getting her into training classes.

Luna, a german shep/chow X, on the other hand is a great big ol' lap dog. She loves everyone and happily (and appropriately) greets other dogs on or off leashes. We've had her since she was a puppy.

Raven and Luna get along WONDERFULLY and we have NEVER had a problem with fights or anything between them.

So, all that brings me to the reason for this post. There are certain things that we would like to do with the dogs (doggie fairs, "take your pooch to the ball park" nights, camping, etc), but we don't because we know that Raven will be leash agressive around other dogs and people and there is just NO way that I would put her, us, or the general public in that position. My question (finally - lol):

Do you think it would be unfair or mean to take Luna on these outings and leave Raven home? They are mostly inside dogs so they get LOADS of interaction/attention here at home. It just breaks my heart to think of leaving Raven home while we go out with Luna.

[Zelda Von Yitz]

Why not see a behavorialist about Raven's behavior? Some doggie discipline lessons would probably help, too.

[maxandmolly]

I understand why you would to take one but not the other. I don't think it's mean, either. But.......on the rare occasion my step-dad takes one dog somewhere (which is generally limited to riding along to the gas station for ice or soda) and leaves the other one home......OH! you'd think the world had come to a screeching halt! Whichever one gets left behind has a ginormous hissy fit. I'd start with small seperate outings, and see how they react, first.

[karlatta]

I think it's fine to leave Raven and take just Luna.

We take our dogs separately all the time. For lots of reasons. At first, it was terrible. Whichever dog was left at home would scream and howl and cause all sorts of ruckus. They seem to have gotten over that, though.

DH takes one of the dogs (Mav) with him on his morning run. The other dog (Meg) cannot go for several reasons. She is not trained well enough to run on a leash and not get distracted by things. She also is a shepherd and we're wary of hip problems.

There are also places that Meg can go that Mav can't. Mav doesn't like crowds and strangers. He can get a little aggressive like Raven, so we don't like to take him places where that could be a problem. (He does fine at dog parks, but not so good at things like 4th of July parties where there are a lot of people and not so many dogs.) Meg, however, LOVES people. A lot like Luna. So we don't take Mav to these places, but we take Meg. I figure it's no harm, because Mav wouldn't even enjoy himself if we took him.

When he first started taking one dog out alone, I would either stay home with the other dog or take him/her out on their own adventure. It cut down on the anxiety. Then we started both going out with one dog, leaving the other at home alone. As soon as we got home, we'd switch dogs and take the one who had been left alone out for a quick walk.

I don't know if that's the right way to do things, but the dogs are okay with it now. I can leave either of them home alone and take the other dog with me, and it's no problem. I can take Mav with me to go run an errand, or stop by the vet's office with Meg, and neither of them care anymore. They both do try to get in the car, but when I tell one of them to go inside and that they're not coming this time, they walk back inside and are fine.

ETA: I definitely think getting Raven into training is a good idea. Mav used to have terrible fear aggression (so bad I wouldn't touch him). Regular training didn't help, but we had a behaviorist come to our home and give us private lessons, and he's a wonderful dog now. Still a bit of a scaredy-cat, but he doesn't get aggressive about it now.

[sublime311]

I figure it's no harm, because Mav wouldn't even enjoy himself if we took him.

Karlatta, I think that's an excellent point. Just like humans, dogs are all different, too and what may make Luna happy will not necessarily make Raven happy. I think if I keep this in mind I can get over the "this is unfair" feelings I have. I really appreciate your experience, it sounds like the SAME EXACT position I'm in, so I will give your technique a try as well as looking into a behavioralist (like you and others suggested) instead of regular obedience training. Or maybe a combo of both!?

I appreciate everyone's feedback!! We all thank you!!