newyorkgirl
12-19-2006, 05:30 PM
I did a search for a thread on this, but came up with one thread that didn't quite address my situation, so I hope it's okay that I'm starting a new thread.
DS has been acting out a bit lately. Specifically, he's been pushing kids and "bullying" them at playgroup. I understand this is part and parcel of him being a toddler and learning how to play nicely and coexist peacefully with others. But at the same time, I still have to stop him when he pushes or hits someone.
I've noticed that he only does it at playgroup, where he is one of the older kids. I mentioned it to his teachers at MDO/preschool (so that they could keep an eye out for it), but they tell me he is nothing but sweetness and docility. Then again, he is the youngest in his MDO class. The teachers have also told me that they take their exercise break (either in the outside playground or down in the church basement) with the 2-year-olds in the MDO program, and DS is very timid around them. I do not know whether he has been bullied by any 2-year-olds, but it would worry me if he had seen the older kids act aggressively toward the younger babies, and then he in turn was acting aggressively toward the younger children at playgroup.
Unfortunately, at this age, I feel like there is not much "teaching" I can do. My solution thus far has been to take his hand and instruct him to be gentle. If that doesn't work, I've given him fair warning and he persists in hitting/pushing, then I pick him up and remove him from the situation. He squirms, whines and says, "Down!" but I try to hold him firm until he calms down, then I let him down and he runs off to play (or to his next victim :rolleyes: ).
I also wonder whether this could be because the time of day our playgroup meets has changed to accommodate most of the kids who have dropped down to one nap. DS is still largely on two naps, so the playgroup time change has added two more days (on top of the two MDO days) per week that he only gets one nap. And maybe he's overtired and acting out?
I just feel embarrassed because my child is the dominant kid at playgroup, and usually not in a good way - it feels as if it's a reflection on me or on our home life (i.e. bad moms or physical homes lead to aggression in kids). I know, I know, I'm probably overreacting, but I just don't know what else to do.
DS has been acting out a bit lately. Specifically, he's been pushing kids and "bullying" them at playgroup. I understand this is part and parcel of him being a toddler and learning how to play nicely and coexist peacefully with others. But at the same time, I still have to stop him when he pushes or hits someone.
I've noticed that he only does it at playgroup, where he is one of the older kids. I mentioned it to his teachers at MDO/preschool (so that they could keep an eye out for it), but they tell me he is nothing but sweetness and docility. Then again, he is the youngest in his MDO class. The teachers have also told me that they take their exercise break (either in the outside playground or down in the church basement) with the 2-year-olds in the MDO program, and DS is very timid around them. I do not know whether he has been bullied by any 2-year-olds, but it would worry me if he had seen the older kids act aggressively toward the younger babies, and then he in turn was acting aggressively toward the younger children at playgroup.
Unfortunately, at this age, I feel like there is not much "teaching" I can do. My solution thus far has been to take his hand and instruct him to be gentle. If that doesn't work, I've given him fair warning and he persists in hitting/pushing, then I pick him up and remove him from the situation. He squirms, whines and says, "Down!" but I try to hold him firm until he calms down, then I let him down and he runs off to play (or to his next victim :rolleyes: ).
I also wonder whether this could be because the time of day our playgroup meets has changed to accommodate most of the kids who have dropped down to one nap. DS is still largely on two naps, so the playgroup time change has added two more days (on top of the two MDO days) per week that he only gets one nap. And maybe he's overtired and acting out?
I just feel embarrassed because my child is the dominant kid at playgroup, and usually not in a good way - it feels as if it's a reflection on me or on our home life (i.e. bad moms or physical homes lead to aggression in kids). I know, I know, I'm probably overreacting, but I just don't know what else to do.