TTC at 35+: Age Is Just a Number!

[Brink]

So I've seen this thread in the boards and have not come in before. I think I'm still in denial that I'm over 35!

Me: Tina (36)
DH: Dan (37)
DD: Aimee - 9/25/05
Married: 6/26/04
TTC#2: Now

My DD is almost 6 months old and because of my "advanced age" we don't want to wait very long between kids. So, we are TTC as of this month. I am still breastfeeding and have not had AF return. I had one month of spotting a couple of months ago and that has been it. I am only planning to BF until 6 months, so I only have a week to go. I'm hoping my cycles return soon and we can start working on this baby.

Congrats to those who have just gotten their BFP and good luck to those still trying.

[stars]

Hi ladies, I've been away visiting my 2 brothers on the West Coast and just got caught up on all the news. Very happy to be home, flying with a 20 month old was a NIGHTMARE!!!!

A big hug goes out to you Liana, I am so sadden to read the news of your loss. Be good to yourself and keep that amazing head up :) we are all here to support you.

Congrats to Catgirl, Maxicat and Astro hope you guys are feeling good.

Margie So sorry to respond to your question a month later ... I got laid off from my job last February 2004, took Dylan out of daycare and didn't go back to work. It's almost a blessing that this all happened with his allergies and asthma, he is one "high maintenance" child.

Hello to Kimmie, Bastille, Ellybelle, Melissa and all the others that are new to this thread.

[Bellefior]

This is going to be a quick drive by post since today is my first day back at work after a month long vacation and I am bombarded with work.

I bit the bullet and have an appointment to see my OB/GYN next Friday to find out if there is a medical reason we are not getting pregnant or if our timing just plain sucks. I had a minor meltdown when AF showed up just as we were getting ready to drive back to MA from FL so I think its time to talk to the doctor. Will keep everyone posted after the visit.

(Oh, and did I mention that I found out over the weekend my cousin is pregnant? That means every single one of our 5 cousins who got married after us have had children since getting married (3 with babies), or are currently pregnant (2 currently expecting). I already told DH I may send my regrets and a gift on some of the upcoming baby showers because I am tired of the "when are you going to have kids question" that inevitably comes up. I know I should go and put on a happy face, but even superwoman has a breaking point, I am sure.)

[mobox]

Good luck at the ob, Bellefior...

I'm onto month two with Clomid. I think I ovulated over the weekend but the OPK is not conclusive. I'm on 2DPO...I keep getting twinges down in the ovarian area so I'm pretty sure the Clomid is causing some small cysts. It's uncomfortable.... Anyway just sending baby dust eveyone's way!;)

[Astro]

cross-posted update...

went in for another u/s today at 7 weeks. They saw nothing but an empty sac, so sent us for a more detailed u/s. The detailed u/s showed the same thing. Looks like we'll be miscarrying in the next week.

[jlo2be]

I'm really sorry Astro.

[ellybelle]

I'm so sorry Astro. That just sucks.

Just a suggestion -- if you don't m/c naturally, and the doc. suggests a d&c, you might want to ask for something like methotrexate, to avoid any scarring. That's what I did during my first pregnancy.

eta. -- I hope that didn't come off too harsh or clinical. But sometimes it's hard to think clearly in times of grief, and it's good to know what your options are.

[Bellefior]

Astro, I'm sorry for your loss. Sending hugs your way and will be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

[CapeCod04]

Astro -I'm so very sorry.

[stars]

Astro BIG HUG ... I'm so sorry.

[melissafromnc]

Astro--so very sorry. Thinking of you.

[mobox]

Astro, my thoughts are with you.

[Fireside Girl]

Astro,
I'm so sorry:(

[Maxicat]

Astro I am so sorry.

I have one question though, is it possible it is just to early? When I went in for my first u/s at 6weeks 3 days, they did not see anything except the sack. It wasn't until a week later that they saw it.

Could the dates be wrong?

I don't want to give you false hope it's just that I went thru the same thing.

My thoughts are with you.

[melissafromnc]

bellefior-I saw your post over on the ivf thread and realized I hadn't responded to your last post. Those ladies know a lot. I think it's a great idea to get an idea of what's going on. Have you been charting or using a fertility monitor? Both are great ways to see if you're ovulating and if your luteal phase is long enough. I found the fertility monitor much easier to use than temping. I think getting some cd3 and 7 dpo bloodwork is a great place to start (fsh, lh, estrogen and progesterone) along with prolactin, tsh and some other common tests. Also ask for a semen analysis (and ask for the Kruger strict morphology with this because it's the only consistent scale that exists). There's lots you can do before ivf but don't be worried if you end up going to ivf sooner. You get tons more information from ivf (and the success rates are higher than anything else). Lots of us here have been through all of this and are happy to answer any questions.

brink Welcome to the thread!

I just thought I'd share some very happy news with y'all regarding someone who was a member of this thread back in the WC days. I don't know if y'all remember firsttimer but she was very active on this thread. She and her husband are adopting a daughter from China and finally got their referral after an incredibly long wait. They'll be traveling to meet her soon and bring her home.

[Bellefior]

Melissa yes I have been charting and have been quite active in the TTC with charting thread. I'm fairly certain from my charts that I'm ovulating but am unsure if my LF are long enough. I've had some as long as 13, average seems to be about 11, but I've also had some as short as 9.

Speaking of charting, does anyone know how to get the FF charts to print w/o including all the BD information other than manually removing it??? The reason I ask is I have to print my charts for the doctor next week and while I understand she's a doctor and looks at it from a clinical perspective, I still feel weird about her seeing all that info about our sex life!

We're going to try everything possible before going on to IVF, only because my insurance plan does not cover it. Even though I live in MA and MA mandates IVF coverage, because I work for the Federal Govt, even though I live in MA, work in MA, and am covered by Blue Cross of MA, my plan can get away without providing IVF coverage because technically, they are not considered a MA employer! I already called the state insurance commission and yes, it is legal. They will cover diagnosis and some treatment, but will not cover anything "invasive" like IVF, IUI, ICSI, etc. Better than nothing, but still sucks! DH just took the bar exam and is looking for work, so unfortunately, switching to his insurance is not possible, and then I might have to deal with a pre-existing condition clause.

One other bit of sort of related news. Last night our church had a reconciliation service as part of the missions they've been conducting pre-Easter. I wasn't planning on going to confession, but my husband went, and after waiting in line to see the same priest he was going to and it was taking too long, I went to see the other (younger) priest because I didn't want to wait any longer. Believe it or not, after confessing your typical standard sins, I also asked him to ask God to help me with my feelings of resentment because we're not pregnant yet and to deal with my feelings of envy towards those who were married after us and either have kids or are currently pregnant. It actually turned into a good discussion with Father L. He told me he would pray for me and my husband, and then hubby told me he had asked the other priest to pray for us as well. Can't hurt and maybe God will take notice if he hears the prayers from 2 priests as well.

[mobox]

Bellefior~That is horrible about your insurance. I swear sometimes, they get away with "murder." It's rediculous. In this day and age, all insurance companies should cover fertility treatments and all procedures. Just MHO though. :o

Well, I"m in the 2WW ladies. It's 9DPO. I don't feel anything yet. Last cycle was the first normal cycle I had in months and AF came 14 DPO. I figure this weekend I'll either start or test.

[stars]

melissa If you email/speak with firsttimer, please tell her congratulations from me. We use to email back and forth a long time ago and I lost her email address when I left my job. I am so thrilled for her and her husband. Hope you are doing well.

[Bellefior]

Cross post from the SAI thread for anyone who might have info:

Question to all of you?

Does anyone know what affect having had cysts in the past have on fertility? About 8 years ago, I landed in the hospital with hemorrhagic cysts, and then was diagnosed with a dermoid cyst on one ovary. They resolved the hemmorhagic cyst issue by putting my on BCPs (hasn't reoccured since I've come off them, thank goodness) and the dermoid cyst spontaneously resolved (or at least thats what they told me the ultrasounds showed). Now my paranoid mind is thinking what if that might be an issue? I will certainly ask the doctor when I see her on Friday, but I figured I'd ask you guys as well and arm myself with knowledge ahead of time!

[melissafromnc]

stars I'll definitely tell her! I'm sure she'll be tickled pink.

moboxHope your 2ww flies by and you have some good news at the end of it. Sure would be nice to have a +++ on this thread. No pressure but I think it could be your turn.

bellefior I've had problems with cysts off and on but they always resolved themselves. I was told it wouldn't necessarily have any impact on my fertility. You should definitely bring it up with your doc. I don't know if you figured out how to remove the bd from ff charts but I know you can chose to display it or not, maybe that's how you can keep from printing? I know my ob wanted to see how our 'timing' was back at my initial consult (lo these MANY years ago now) so I left it in. It did feel kind of strange though. I'd also ask her about the changing lps. They aren't supposed to vary that much so it could indicate a 'weak' ovulation, maybe you'll just need some progesterone or clomid+progesterone to help things along. I hear ya on the self-pay thing: it really, really hurts. We had diagnostic stuff covered but nothing else. The good news is that due to HIPAA, as long as you maintain insurance you don't have to worry about pre-existing conditions if you change to another carrier. That's the portability part of HIPAA. It stinks that you live in one of the best states for IF coverage and have crappy coverage. So sorry!

I'm just trying to survive the wet, wet spring we're having in the bay area. Yup it's another rainy day (we've only had 6 days without rain since March 1). Hope everyone else is enjoying better weather.

[Bellefior]

Thanks for the info Melissa. I'm just going to leave all the info in there for the doctor. Can't hurt and talking about our sex life is probably a lot more confortable than an annual exam, that's for sure! I've had some rather short (9 day according to FF) LPs, so I definitely want to ask about that. Will keep you all posted. Thanks for the info, especially on the HIPAA and pre-existing issue.

[margiepgh]

Sorry I've been MIA for awhile. I just got back from a vacation to Charleston, SC, which was alot of fun with our 2 year old.

Melissa - Thanks for giving us the update on firsttimer. :) That is wonderful news.

Astro - I was so sorry to read about your loss. Please take care.:(

Brink - Welcome! I've added your stats to the first page.

LeighW, Pixie - How are things with you?

----------------

Update on me......

I had my thyroid testing redone at my endocrinologist's office a few weeks ago, and the results came back in the normal range. Since the thryoid is OK now, I had my Day 3 testing redone at the RE's office. The nurse said that all results were normal (FSH of 8.3, E2 of 30, and normal ultrasound results). I have an appointment with the RE on 4/10 and will discuss the next steps.

[stars]

margie woo hoo for your normal results :) keep us posted how the appt. goes, best of luck!

[pixielou]

bellefior your doctor will want to know your bd schedule - just to make sure you are covering your bases. so it might actually involve less discussion of your sex life if you have the bd noted on your charts. the doc will just see it and as long as you have the appropriate times marked, then end of discussion.

and fwiw - i know my ob and re barely looked at my charts. my re probably looked at my charts for a grand total of 3 seconds - if that long.

*****************
not much going on in the land of pixie. dh and i have narrowed our search for ivf down to 2 clinics. one clinic says that we should use high stims to produce lots of eggs so we have a better chance of finding a good egg. the other clinic says low stims to produce just a few eggs, with the hopes that we will produce quality, not quantity. but i've decided to get some counseling before we go forward - since i really need to emotionally deal with the miscarriages before i feel like we can move forward.

~pixie

[Bellefior]

Getting slammed here at work so this will be a drive by post, but it looks like I had a positive OPK this afternoon--trying to be discreet while peeing on a stick in the bathroom at work is, shall we say, interesting???

In any event, I am still keeping my appointment with the OB/GYN for Friday to discuss why it hasn't happened in 12 cycles. God willing, I'm hoping the next appointment after this will be a pre-natal visit...but I've been disappointed before so I am not getting my hopes up just yet.

[mobox]

Question or request from you all...I am curious as to the route your doctors have taken when it took a long time to conceive. For me, it's only been:

1. DH gets tested
2. HSG
3. Clomid

I'm on my second Clomid cycle and she only said I could do 3-4. What's next? I was hoping to see what other's experiences have been. For instance, did they ever actually check you for eggs, when did they check your hormone levels, did they check the chemical make-up of your uterus? When did you see a RE? I have so many questions! I'm sorry...

[pixielou]

mobox are you seeing an re for the clomid? are you doing a monitored clomid cycle? are you doing an hcg trigger with the clomid? i think it is really important to have a monitored cycle with clomid - both blood and u/s - to assure that the clomid is working properly. if your body isn't responding to the clomid, why continue to take it?

i went to the re after 5 cycles of trying. though it took 2+ months to get an appointment - so it was more like 7-8 cycles.

my re typically would do 2-4 clomid cycles with hcg trigger and timed intercourse, then would move on to iui. iui would typically involve injectables. i think it is more an issue that if clomid doesn't work in 3-4 cycles, then why bother to continue to take it - you need to move on to something else. i don't *think* that additional clomid would actually harm you - it's just that it isn't doing anything for you.

hope that helps. good luck to you.

~pixie

[melissafromnc]

margie Yay for the good test results!

pixielou I'm a big believer in therapy, especially around all this if crap. It's really helped me. I've done both the high stim and the low stim approach and I'm a big believer in low stims. It's really about quality over quantity. FWIW I had my worst cycle EVER on high stims. I think it was really toxic (and super expensive--I was on 10 amps a day or 750 iu, for 17 days).

mobox I second pixielou's suggestion of monitored clomid cycle. It's so much better if you KNOW how you're doing on it (how many eggs you're producing/what you're lining looks like/etc). I'm of the opinion that clomid is evil (it has such a long half life and does nasty things to lining and such) that the only way I took it was to have ultrasounds to see what was going on. My REs don't like anyone to be on it for more than 3 cycles because the bad effects can get worse with each cycle. Typically after clomid you'd to injectibles with iuis, then perhaps ivf. Injectibles actually have far fewer side effects than clomid and are just easier on your body. My REs recommend trying each type of thing 3x or so (unless you get more information from a particular cycle). Have you not had cd3 and 7dpo bloodwork done? That's another thing you can have done fairly early (I did that along with the hsg and sa) that can give you some good information.

[Bellefior]

Mobox I'll be seeing my regular OB tommorrow morning to discuss next steps since we have not gotten pregnant yet and I've been off the pill since last May. I'll let you know what her suggested plan of action is.

[tsmom]

Just popping in to see how you guys are doing!

Astro - so so sorry, please take care of yourself.

Melissa please tell firsttimer that I said Hi and congrats to her and dh!! (oh heck, I was lln on the wc)

Stars nice to see you in here and active - sorry to hear about your job but you are right it was probably a blessing if you get to stay home with D now.

Kimmie - I have been checking up on you!

Does anyone hear from Bastille?

*********
update with me..... I am officially back at work now - pretty sad about it but it will get better. Drake arrived just as planned on his due date (1/30, 4:52pm, 7lbs and 8oz) and very quickly. He is just a blessing and I am constantly reminded of just how lucky we are. I will be around to cheer you all on and celebrate all the babies to come out of this thread!

[Fireside Girl]

tsmom,
Congratulations on Drake!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As for me, I had my level 2 ultrasound yesterday. Everything looks perfect, and we are having a BOY!

[Bellefior]

Cross posted from the Charting Thread

Well I had my visit with my OB/GYN this morning. It went pretty much as I expected. She did look at my charts and confirmed that I am ovulating so the problem is not there. I also asked about my short luteal phases (usually about 11 days average) and she said that as long as my overall cycle wasn't short (average 28 days) then its not something to worry about. She basically just looked at my first chart and my last and flipped through the rest to see the thermal shifts, didn't really focus too much on the BD'ing other than to confirm verbally with me, that we had been trying and had been trying at the appropriate time of the month. She also told me that a history of cysts in the past would not generally affect fertility.

So the plan is this. CD 3 Bloodwork, Ultrasound (due to the past history of cysts) and an HSG somewhere between days 7-11. If all that comes back okay then DH goes in for his SA. If they can't find anything, then because of my age, her recommendation would be to send me to the IVF clinic. Which my insurance doesn't cover--I think I may have said this before...while MA law requires employers to cover infertility treatments, because I work for the Federal Government, they can get away with being able to exclude it because technically its not a MA employer. They will pay for diagnosis and some treatment, but nothing invasive like IVF, IUI etc. In other words, none of the more expensive stuff.

I probably should have had my husband come with me to the appointment (he just dropped me off) because when he called me on my cell phone to see how it went, I nearly had a meltdown in the middle of the street. I managed to pull myself together enough to tell him I would call him when I actually got into my office. I made it to my office, closed my door, and then called him back to finish having my meltdown and a good cry. I'm not feeling very good about my situation right now. While the doctor did say we are not sure yet about this month (I'm mid-cycle), the recommendation that we go immediately to the IVF clinic to see what they could do if the initial testing showed no problems, while expected, was not what I wanted to hear mainly because of the rotten insurance situation.

So anyway, that is where I'm at. Today has been such a downer and I'm sorry if my post reflects that. Will keep you all posted.

[pocahontas]

FIRESIDE GIRL! CONGRATS! Great to see those of us 35+ getting our hearts desire! (Feel free to spread some baby dust so I can get my BFP before I turn 36 next month. YIKES! :eek: I'm soooo dreading that birthday.) :(

[melissafromnc]

firesidegirl A BOY!!!!! A healthy boy! That is sooooooo wonderful. I'm so happy for you guys. You have no idea just how much I needed to hear some good news today, and how glad it was from you.

tsmomLittle Drake is such a cutie! I'm sure it must be hard for you being back at work. I do talk to bastille on a semi-regular basis. She does check in here and I know how much she thinks of all of you.

bellefiorSounds like your ob is on top of things. Good luck with all the testing. Call and schedule your hsg as soon as you get CD1 (if you get another one--here's hoping you won't need it). I got yelled at by my hospital for waiting until CD3 to schedule. I know how hard it is to be self-pay but many clinics have reduced rates (or can give you 'deals' like free drugs) and try to make it less painful. There are also sources to get meds at a greatly reduced costs which helps tremendously.

pocohantas You youngster you! I barely remember 36. Heck, I barely remember my 30s now. Hope you have a good reason for not being able to fully celebrate your birthday.

[pocahontas]

pocohantas You youngster you! I barely remember 36. Heck, I barely remember my 30s now. Hope you have a good reason for not being able to fully celebrate your birthday.Thanks MELISSA!! Puking over a toilet for my birthday never looked quite so good! :D Hope that'll be my fate...what a way to bring in 36! hehehe ;) My mom gave birth to me at age 39, and you've only got her by a year. So here's wishing YOU the best of luck!

[mobox]

Poca--I only have 2 weeks until 36 so there!!! :rolleyes:

I'm on CD30 ladies. Two days past due for AF. I have been quite crampy since Friday, but it really comes and goes. If I don't start today, I have a PG test at home and will do it tonight.

I know how hard it is to be self-pay but many clinics have reduced rates (or can give you 'deals' like free drugs) and try to make it less painful. There are also sources to get meds at a greatly reduced costs which helps tremendously.


Speaking of this, does anyone have any references/websites/etc regarding lower cost clinics and how to find them or also getting lower cost meds?? Anything would be helpful.

[Bellefior]

Cross post from Charting Thread

Stopped by the drugstore across from work to pick up some HPT's. I'm debating whether or not to test on Easter Sunday if AF does not show before then, which would be DPO 11 for me (not officially late). But since both my ILs and dad will be at our house for dinner that day, I may just end up waiting until Monday. (Memo to self: move HPTs and OPKs out of vanity in master bath to half bath in the event that ILs or Dad go under there to look for the extra toilet paper. That's all I need is for them to see that stuff in there.)

I always get my tests at the CVS across the street because there is a self-scanner there and I am self conscious about buying that stuff. Well, wouldn't you know as I was using it today, the scanner starts telling me that the product placed in the bag does not match the weight of the scanned product. The clerk -- a guy of course--had to come over to help me. Thankfully, it wasn't the box with the HPTs and was at the end of my scanning (bought my Easter candy too) so the HPTs were already in the bag!

[pocahontas]

I knew I liked you, MO! :D You're a Taurus like me!! I have my fingers crossed for you, gurlie...for BOTH of us! 36 should be a GREAT age! :p (BELLEFIOR...my test date would be Easter Sunday too! But since FF just moved my O date back 2 days I think it's going to end up being later. :( ) *sigh*Poca--I only have 2 weeks until 36 so there!!! :rolleyes:

I'm on CD30 ladies. Two days past due for AF. I have been quite crampy since Friday, but it really comes and goes. If I don't start today, I have a PG test at home and will do it tonight.



Speaking of this, does anyone have any references/websites/etc regarding lower cost clinics and how to find them or also getting lower cost meds?? Anything would be helpful.

[melissafromnc]

mobox I'm not sure who the cheapest clinics in your area are. I know some folks go to SIRM, which can be pretty expensive but if you're a teacher they have a fantastic program that is fairly affordable. You can ask some of the other So Cal gals here or on the SAI thread or check out the CA threads on ivfconnections.com. For meds, Freedom Drug is very cheap and fantastic to work with. IVFMeds is British based and has the sexiest pharmacist I've ever spoken to on the phone. And there's also the black market. That's where the absolute best deals are. I've personally had great experiences with folks from freegaragesale.com (medical classifieds) but many folks are hesitant to use them. I'm currently going through my own stash and getting rid of stuff and would be happy to discuss this offline with anyone who's interested.

bellefiorYou are a brave woman to test at 11dpo.

For those about to test, or just slightly obsessive like me, here are a few fun websites that have tons of info on sensitivity of specific tests/beta ranges/doubling calculators/etc
http://www.peeonastick.com
http://www.ivfer.com/hcg.htm
http://www.betabase.info/

[Bellefior]

Melissa I'm on the fence about testing on Sunday (even though my average LP is 11 days and Sunday is DPO 11). But Given that its Easter it would be a major bummer if it came back negative and since we are hosting dinner, I don't want to have a long face in front of our parents or having them ask me why I'm so quiet. I'm probably going to wait until Mon, maybe even later if I can hold out...

[pocahontas]

Terrific success story I had to share that only my 35+ girls could truly appreciate. So my DH is at a client's house this morning and she had her 6 month old nephew there. And after the appointment as they sat and talked she asked him if he had a family yet. He says, "Not yet, but we're working on it." She tells him...stop trying and it'll happen. And she proceeds to tell the story of how that little 6 month old boy got here. She says he was born to a 42 year old mother and 44 year old father who thought they were past their prime and wouldn't be able to conceive naturally. Lo and behold, they were wrong. And their little boy was born. I just thought that might give someone out there hope because I thought that was pretty inspirational. ;)

[jesseybell]

bellefior - I am crossing my fingers for you! I felt the same way about testing on Thanksgiving. I was LD 10 or 11. I chose not to test in the morning but on a whim tested in the evening (telling myself that if it was negative it may just because it wasn't strong enough urine). It was very slightly + confirmed with about 4 + tests the next morning. But I completely understand if you want to wait.

[stars]

tsmom Congrats on the birth of Drake.

Bellefior I have everything crossed over here for ya for a BFP, that would make a great Easter present :)

pocahontas LOVE hearing stories like that one, thanks for sharing.

[margiepgh]

pocohantas - Thanks for sharing that story!

bellefior - I'm crossing all of my crossables for you. Please give us an update on Monday.

tsmom- Congrats on the birth of your son.:) How are things at home with two little ones?

melissa, stars - How are things with you?

-------
Update on me......

I went to the RE on Tuesday and we went over the results from the latest CD3 testing. Compared to November, my FSH decreased from 10 to 8.3 and my antral follicles increased from 5 to 16. The RE thinks the improvement is probably mostly due to the fact that I was in the midst of an episode of hyperthyroidism in November.

He is now recommending a cycle of injectables, with either timed intercourse or IUI. The cost of the monitored injection cycle is $1600 and the cost of the IUI is $400. I discussed my insurance with the finance director at the RE's office, and apparently I have some limited coverage for treatment. If I go with the injection/intercourse option I am fully covered by insurance, except that I may (or may not) have to pay the $150 monitoring fee. If I go with the injection/IUI option I will have to pay the entire $2000. My prescription plan is pretty good and I will likely be covered for the drugs (about $2000 worth :eek: ) regardless of which option we choose. So we will probably option for the injection/intercourse option both as a money saver and because IUI is not consistent with our faith (Catholicism). I am scheduled to take an injection class on May 6th and we will probably start the cycle near the end of May.

[tsmom]

Thanks for all the congrats!!! I will still be around to cheer you ladies on though!

[mobox]

Melilssa- Thank you SO much for the info!

[pixielou]

margie good luck with your upcoming cycle. i think i would choose the insurance covered options first as well if i was in your shoes. a big part will be finding out how your body responds to the drugs. if the cycle ends up being a bust, at least you'll have better information to help you make a decision for future cyles. also, any chance you can "pretend" to do the intercourse cycle, and then just self pay for the iui and not let insurance know? i know that my re uses some "creative financing" options.

~pixie (who is wondering if anyone got any fertilized eggs from the easter bunny this year. . .weren't a couple people going to test today?????)

[LeighW]

Margie: good news on your latest test results. :) I was going to suggest what Pixie said--most REs are very savy about getting ins. cos. to cough up as much money as possible. IUIs are not covered by my ins., but my RE bills the cycle so everything except the IUI itself is covered. (I just wanted to throw that out there if finances are the major roadblock to an IUI cycle. Disregard if the major roadblock is religion. :) )

Pcochantas: great story. :)

Bellefior: hoping to hear good news from you today. :)

tsmom: Congrats! :)

Mobox: waiting for your good news also. :)

Need to go catch up on the previous page. . . .

[LeighW]

Bonnie: Congrats on your boy. How exciting. :)

Melissa: I've been meaning to say your Oscars party sounded lovely. Do you love your kitchen? We did a small update 1.5 years ago, but I really, really want to do a full-scale renovation now.

Pocohantas: I think you are a youngester also. (I'm 42.) ;)

My report: not much new. I've had about 5 accupuncture sessions and I really like the doc. My DH has also been getting treatments, so I guess we'll see. We've both eliminated caffeine and alcohol (except for a small slip-up yesterday on my part) and are mostly gluten-free. Painful, but I am generally feeling better so it must be doing something good.

I am 9 DPO and my temp took a nosedive yesterday (hence the wine slip-up), but it's back up this morning. So who the heck knows.

[Bellefior]

Cross posted from the charting thread, please disregard if you've already read it

I don't know why I torture myself like this. After the temp drop yesterday, I knew that AF was probably around the corner. I started spotting then completely stopped. So this morning, after my temp jump slightly and still no more spotting, what do I do? Take a HPT which of course was negative, then I started spotting again shortly thereafter, which was a waste of a perfectly good pregnancy test. Why did I expect this month to be any different? If AF is going to arrive, I wish she would hurry the hell up.

Of course, do you know what the first thing is that my wonderful husband says to me when I tell him yesterday that I was pretty certain that this month was not our month? "Are you going to be in a pissy mood all day when our parents get here?" Gee, thanks for being so f-ing understanding.

I put on a real good show yesterday afternoon and thought I had it under control. I actually was enjoying myself. But as I was trying to put part of desert together-homemade cannolis-for some reason the filling would just not set up properly and while edible (and still tasting good), it was a little too runny. So of course wonderful husband starts laughing, proceeds to tell me how he would have done it differently (he's a gourmet cook, and even though I was following a recipe and he's never made them in his life, he kept saying, I would do this, I would do that, and what he wanted to do was nothing even close to what the recipe called for), and asks if I am actually going to serve them like that. Now like I said, they were edible, the presentation was just not quite as good as a bakery's but hell, they were homemade! He wouldn't stop, kept telling me what I had done wrong, asked again if I was serving them like that, then makes some comment about Obi-Wan Cannoli, thinking he is being funny.

Well, at that point something snapped, and I said fine, you don't want them, you don't think they are fit to serve, fine we won't serve them. And I started flinging them off the desert tray into the sink. All 6 of them. I wasn't upset at the fact that desert didn't turn out the way I had hoped, I was upset about the fact he was being a complete a-hole. Of course, he starts yelling at me, what are you doing? I then used a few choice words, got my jacket and keys, and excused myself to our guests telling hubby to serve them coffee, and telling my ILs I was leaving the house because if I stayed any longer, I would end up killing their son. Then I went out for a long long walk and came back about an hour later. Apparently, while I was gone, my dad stayed out of it, but my ILs ripped him a new one, especially FIL telling him he didn't know when to keep his mouth shut (since our dining and living room leads off the kitchen, they pretty much heard most of it) and a smart man would have kept his mouth shut, eaten the cannoli, and told his wife they were the best he ever had! Not my husband, however. And after when he apologized, he said he was laughing with me. I told him since I wasn't laughing, he was laughing at me and there was a huge difference. Sometimes I just wish he would grow the hell up.

So that was my Easter. Not exactly the Easter present I was hoping for. We did everything right last month and our timing was as perfect as it could possibly be and it still didn't matter. I am absolutely dreading the DH family function on Saturday night and am probably going to send my regrets and gift to DH's cousin's shower which will be held in the next month or so. Petty? Maybe, but there is only so much that my psyche can stand.

The only "good" thing about this is I have CD3 bloodwork, ultrasound, and an HSG scheduled this/next week, and was able to project the dates correctly so I do not have to change the appointments. I'm also going to call the doctor's office tommorrow to find out about scheduling the SA. I thought that she wanted my testing completed first before scheduling his, but I may have been wrong and even if I didn't misunderstand, I don't see why it can't be done at the same time. Maybe we'll finally get some answers.

[Bellefior]

MargieI think you may have mentioned this before, but can't remember. Are you also covered by the Fed. govt. employee health insurance? I'm having the same issue (I work for the Feds) and we're trying to figure out what will and won't be covered.

[pocahontas]

Cross posted from the charting thread, please disregard if you've already read it


The only "good" thing about this is I have CD3 bloodwork, ultrasound, and an HSG scheduled this/next week, and was able to project the dates correctly so I do not have to change the appointments. I'm also going to call the doctor's office tommorrow to find out about scheduling the SA. I thought that she wanted my testing completed first before scheduling his, but I may have been wrong and even if I didn't misunderstand, I don't see why it can't be done at the same time. Maybe we'll finally get some answers.
BELLEFIOR...looks like you and I will be going through the same thing at the same time. I have CD3 b/w prob. Friday since I'm expect the hag on Wednesday (if I don't get lucky) and an HSG as well as an u/s next week. Scheduled DH's SA for Thursday. So I'm with you...just looking to figure out if there's something going on I should know about. Good luck!

[LeighW]

Bellefior: You. Poor. Thing. Can't believe your DH was such a poophead. Good for you for calling him on his behavior. I must admit, though, I laughed out loud at the thought of dumping homemade cannolis down the drain.

Good luck with the testing, for you and Pocohantas.

[margiepgh]

pixie, LeighW - Thanks for the suggestions for dealing with the insurance. In my case, however, it was the RE's office that told me that the insurance company would not cover the injectables/IUI, but would cover the injectables/timed BD. So, I don't think they were interested in finding a "creative financing" plan for increasing my insurance coverage. I took it as a sign (from above) that I shouldn't be going with the IUI.

LeighW - Are you doing the gluton-free diet to improve your chances for TTC or is it for other reasons? It sounds extremely difficult.

Bellefior - I don't work for the federal government, but I live in a state (PA) without mandatory infertility coverage. Actually, my health plan is excellent in all other respects, where just about everything is covered 100% and I only pay a $5 copay for prescriptions.

[LeighW]

Margie: Oh, duh. ;) Your RE has probably been down that road before with your ins. co. It just doesn't make sense that they will cover monitoring for injectibles but not for an IUI cycle (even if they don't cover the IUI procedure itself). Oh well, just one of many things that don't make sense to me.

It sounds like you all have made a good decision. :) Time for one of us 40+-ers to have some good luck!

Bellefior: Margie's experience aside, the best way to figure out what your ins. will pay for is by asking the billing person at the RE's office. They are very experienced and used to working with ins. cos.

I am a federal employee and have BCBS PPO. I only got information for an injectible/IUI cycle, since that was what my RE recommended. BCBS will cover all the drugs and everything except the IUI itself (so all the testing and monitoring is covered). You will have to pay your co-pay, deductibles, and for the IUI procedure. At my RE's office, they said it would run about $850-$900 per cycle. Your prescription drug plan might be different than mine, but I was told I would need to used a BCBS-approved mail order pharmacy for the meds.

Also, BCBS pays for some semen analyses but not all of them. My RE orders an extra test that BCBS would not pay for, so that was another $210 out of pocket for us.

We ended up going the alternative meds route, so we haven't actually done the IUI cycle.

Good luck figuring out the insurance angle. It is daunting and frustrating.

[LeighW]

Margie: The naturopath gyn recommended gluten-free for fertility purposes. My DH also has a recurrent tennis elbow problem and the doc said that gluten can contribute to inflammatory problems. I'm also doing it for general purposes--I've been told I am intolerant to gluten by 2 allergists.

It's not really that bad--there are a lot of gluten-free products these days--pasta, bread, flours, etc. The worst thing is planning ahead and experimenting with gluten-free flours for baking (some work better than others, I'm learning). It was much worse when I tried to go wheat-free as a teenager (no one said "gluten" back then, lol, probably didn't realize gluten was the real culprit). Back then my only choices were rice and potatoes. Lots of potatoes. To this day, I don't really care for potatoes.

[LeighW]

I wasn't trying to exclude any of you "youngsters" from having good luck. ;) Any good luck around here would be good. :)

[melissafromnc]

bellefior I can't believe your husband was such a turd. Good for your FIL for reading him the riot act though. Sounds like he totally deserved it. Never make fun of a woman. Especially one with raging hormones. So sorry to hear this wasn't your cycle but glad you can get the testing out of the way.

pochantas Good luck with your testing as well!

leighw We're loving our kitchen. Thanks so much for asking! There are still a few teeny tiny things we need to finish up. The last to-dos seem to be the hardest. I'm just not as motivated now that I can cook. Kudos to you for doing the gluten-free thing. I know the Endo Diet relies heavily on that approach. Glad you're finding lots of stuff to eat.

Hope everyone else had a great weekend. It rained here all weekend (again) but is finally beginning to clear up. I'm finishing off some of the chocolate eggs that seem to be hanging around my dining room.

[jesseybell]

bellefior - I am sorry that DH was being such a jerk. They just don't get it sometimes. They just can't comprehend what a BFN/AF really means. But I really came to tell you how sorry I am that AF arrived. But at the same time you do get to do the testing this month and hopefully it will show something, something that can easily be corrected (it always sounds so weird to say that you hope they find something - but since I have a BF who has "unexplained infertility" I understanding the importance of knowing).

[stars]

bellefior sorry you had such a stinky Easter, hope things are better for you. Hope you and pocahontas have good tests this week. Hang in there and let us know how it goes.

melissa Hi there ... I myself am going to turn into a chocolate egg if I don't stop!

LeighW Very interesting stuff about the Gluten. My DS is allergic to Gluten (as well as Soy, Milk, Eggs). I'm always on the search for good products so if you come across any, please share.

On another note... grasping at straws here ... you could call it my "denial stage" after having a child I don't think I need to go back to the RE to conceive again.

Has anyone tried progesterone creme?

[melissafromnc]

stars Progesterone cream isn't great to use because you can't control how much you get (and it's probably not going to be enough if you need to supplement). I did try it but it never helped. It's far less effective than other forms of progesterone. If you're not up to going back to the RE you might check out freegaragesale.com for progesterone suppositories, crinone or prometrium.

[jesseybell]

bellefior- me again. I saw your post in a couple places about the monitor, but thought I'd answer you here. I used the Clear Blue Easy. I actually didn't know there were others. I've heard you can get them on e-bay cheaper, but I just bit the bullet and got it at my pharmacy because I was on Day 1 at the time.
I definitely attribute it to helping us get pg so quickly - the first couple months it showed that I wasn't ovulating and then the second 2 months showed I wasn't Oing until Day 21. You still need to temp to show that you actually did O, but I am such an anal person that it is nice to be able to have it as part of my morning routine versus using OPKs (though I did use OPKs to supplement "just to be sure").
Definitely worth the money!

[pocahontas]

I wasn't trying to exclude any of you "youngsters" from having good luck. ;) Any good luck around here would be good. :)Aaaah, finally a place where I actually am called a "youngster". :D Leigh...you know how hilarious that sounds to my ears though since every thread I hang around I feel like...what is with this?! I am nearly a decade older than all these young bucks in the 20something crew! :confused:

[LeighW]

Stars, these crackers are my 3-year-old's current favorite:

http://www.healthvalley.com/products/product.php?prod_id=17&cat_id=2

She actually prefers them over the cheese TLCs (Tasty Little Crackers) I used to buy. Although, I don't avoid soy or eggs, so they might include things your DS can't have.

DH and I like these crackers:

http://www.marysgonecrackers.com/product_info.php?products_id=4

I also like Trader Joe's organic rice penne pasta.

I use progesterone cream. You can buy Progest at Whole Foods in pre-measured little tubes. You use 1/2 of the tube for each application, twice a day. I concur with Melissa, it's probably too small of a dose to make a difference. I do it anyway, on the off chance it is helping. I have a short LP and usually spot, and the progesterone cream seems to be helping. Or it's the accupuncture. I started both at about the same time, so now I'm stuck doing both. :p

I am sad to say I am in the opposite situation. I conceived my DD with no assistance, in under a year when I was 38. I stupidly thought I could do it again. This time, I've been TTC#2 for almost 2 years. Sigh.

Edited to make links work.

[Fireside Girl]

Bellefior
I'm sorry your DH was being such a jerk!

Melissa
Any news to report???

[melissafromnc]

Hmmmm. It appears that I've been outed. ;)

I've been kind of on the down low. Ok. Incredibly on the down low but I do have some news. I'm not sure I'm ready to call it 'official' until after Friday but I've had a couple of postive betas. Ok. 4 or so positive betas--in my defense they started off EXTREMELY low but have been doubling very nicely. Friday will be the first ultrasound and we're just hoping to see something in the uterus (I had a previous ectopic pregnancy a couple of years ago so I'm still a little worried about that). As of today I'm 5w4d.

bonnie Thanks for the nudge.

[Fireside Girl]

Congratulations, Melissa!
I'm so happy to be pregnant at the same time with you!!!It couldn't happen to a nicer person.:D

I hope we get some more good news in this thread soon!

[LeighW]

Melissa!!! Congratulations! I am soooo happy for you.

Sending you lots of healthy, growing vibes for Friday. I hope you have a long, uneventful, even boring 9 months ahead.

:) :) :) :) :)

[stars]

Melissa OH MY GOD ... I'm smiling from ear to ear over here. Now can I ask was this "oh naturale" or was there assistance involved? Congrats to you and your DH and I have everything crossed over here for tripling betas and a great ultrasound, can't wait to see the pic.

LeighW Thanks for the links, they are extremely helpful and also lead me into new territory. Also thank you for your feedback on the creme.

[margiepgh]

Melissa - CONGRATULATIONS!!!:D

[pocahontas]

CONGRATS MELISSA! Wasn't someone just saying we needed good news in this thread! WOO HOO!

LEIGHW: I find that I spot also the day before AF (and occasionally the day after she's suppposed to have left.) Would you suggest trying that Whole Foods Progest you were talking about? I saw you say it helped you.

[Hangin'in]

Melissa I wondered if someone was going to have to *out* you! Congrats... you know that!

[ellybelle]

Congratulations, Melissa!!!! Such good news! Wishing you lots of stickies (uterine ones!) and a H&H 9 months!!

I'll have to start hanging out here more often! Dh and I are going to start trying again soon (probably in June), so I'm already starting to get a little apprehensive. I think I'll start doing some "semi-charting" soon. Oh yeah, and join WW tomorrow -- I just got another one of those "free registration" cards. Weight Watchers is like the Catholic Church -- you're always welcome back! ;)

[mobox]

MELISSA~ So happy to hear your good news! Sticky vibes coming your way.

And good luck to all you gals who are going in for numerous test and procedures. I hope you find what you are looking for.

[pixielou]

huge congratulations melissa. i am just so happy to hear this!!!

firesidethanks for outing her! so i didn't have to!!! i've been showing lots of restraint myself. . .

~pixie

[Maxicat]

Melissa I am so excited for you. How weird I have totally been thinking about you lately. My fingers are crossed for your u/s. Just don't do it to early it can be heartbreaking when it does not need to be. 6 + weeks is great but if you can wait to 7 weeks even better.

Maybe we can go online shopping together.

[LeighW]

Pocohantas: It depends on why you think you are spotting. My ob and RE say that spotting in and of itself is not a problem. It is a problem if it starts before 10 DPO because it signals your lining is beginning to break down early and you need at least a 10 day LP for successful implantation. If your LP is normally 11 or 12 days, and you start spotting on 11 or 12 DPO, I don't think that's so much of a problem.

My spotting started early--8 or 9 DPO.

Natural progesterone won't hurt anything, but it might not help, if that makes sense.

[Bellefior]

Question for those who have had an HSG

Do you know if you are prohibited from BDing for any time after the exam?

DH's SA is scheduled the day after my HSG (day 10, well before usual O date) and am wondering if that is going to hinder TTC this month. Thanks.

[pocahontas]

Question for those who have had an HSG

Do you know if you are prohibited from BDing for any time after the exam?

DH's SA is scheduled the day after my HSG (day 10, well before usual O date) and am wondering if that is going to hinder TTC this month. Thanks.
Don't know if this helps, BELLEFIOR, but I wasn't told not to BD or given any stipulations for sex (although I didn't DTD 'til at least 48-72 hours later.)

[stars]

Bellefior I've actually heard that after the HSG many women get pregnant. I say go for it ;)

[pocahontas]

Bellefior I've actually heard that after the HSG many women get pregnant. I say go for it ;)DITTO what STARS said...guess I should have added that to my post. Didn't work for me but I have heard it works for a whole lot of folx!

[melissafromnc]

Thanks for all the congrats and kind words. It's still feeling quite surreal over here.

stars A natural cycle? You mean have s-e-x? ;) No, it was really far from that. It was actually a frozen embryo transfer and we only had one (apparently very nice) one make the thaw. It really does just take one.

maxicat I think it would be great to wait until 7w but we're still a little concerned about the chance of an ectopic. I've had one in the past so my odds are much higher than other folks' and the betas started off so low that even the docs are a little concerned. I'm just hoping to see something in the uterus. And maybe get another us fairly quickly. I'd looooove to shop with you though.

bellefior The cycle you have your hsg and the cycle after are a great time to ttc. Like others have said there are lots of positives then.

[Maxicat]

Melissa I had forgotten about the eptopic issue. I understand better now. My thoughts are with you and I have all my fingers crossed for you.

I found out last week that my little burrito is actually a GIRL. I was so surprised I asked them to check again. I don't know why I thought I was having a boy but she's not. I am getting my own little shopping buddy. DH has already started worrying about if she can ever go out on a date and he wants to start to save for her wedding.

Also we got nuchal (sp) test results back and we have a 1 in 3582 chance of having a downs syndrome issue. So this means I don't have to have an amnio.

[melissafromnc]

maxicat Congrats on your daughter! How exciting! Oh the shopping fun in your future. Also it must be reassuring to get such good news back from your nt. I don't want to get too far ahead of myself yet, but how early can you schedule that?

[mobox]

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Bellefior I've actually heard that after the HSG many women get pregnant. I say go for it

My MIL was a neo-natal, RE nurse and she said the same thing.

[LeighW]

Melissa~If memory serves, a nuchal fold is done between 11 and 13 weeks. (I remember mine was at 12 weeks and something.)

I am out of town for a while beginning tomorrow, but I am wishing you good luck at the u/s!

[Bellefior]

Well the doctor's office finally called back and said to go ahead with the bloodwork, so I had the labs drawn today (they actually had my chart confused with someone elses, and kept saying, we don't know why she--meaning the doctor-- wants day 3 bloodwork, so I had to wait for them to get hold of the doctor again to straighten things out). At least this means I don't have to change any of the other appointments, including the HSG scheduled for next week. Keeping my fingers crossed that maybe after next weeks tests, the next scheduled doctor's visit will be an OB visit.

[pixielou]

maxicat congratulations on your little girl! my dh was the same way when we found out we were having a girl - worried about the whole dating thing. he even joked that he wished he could register for a shotgun at babies 'r us - for those dating days!

melissa since i knew i was having an amnio - no matter what - my ob actually recommended against the nt. she said the results are not definite - it's a screening, similar to the afp blood/triple screen. she said that if the results came back questionable, all i would do was worry until the amnio. and she's right. so depending on your plans for an amnio - you may or may not want to pass on the nt. (the nt is around week 12. the amnio can be done the earliest at week 15,weeks 15-20 - though they typically do the level 2 u/s at the same time, so the longer you wait for the level 2, the better the screening - though the more delay for the amnio. does that make any sense?)

we have finally picked an ivf clinic. i haven't had af since my mc in january, so i need to start some drugs to bring it on. i see a cranky hormone girl in my future. the new re wants to do another hsg. he says that there is a minor chance that i could have tube damage from my ectopic last october - in which case, i would have a better shot at getting insurance to pay for the ivf. so, as much as i hate the thought of doing another hsg, if it could potentially save me $20k, i'll do it!

~pixie

[Fireside Girl]

Maxicat,
Congratulations on your Girl!

Melissa,
I had my nuchal fold @ 12w6d. I had the AFP @ 18w, and the Level 2 @ 18w2d.

Because of my previous miscarriages I wanted to avoid amniocentesis if all other screenings indicated no problem.

[jesseybell]

Congratulations melissa! Crossing my fingers for you that the betas keep doubling and the eggie is exactly where it should be. I tried to get an u/s at six weeks because I was a high-risk for ectopic as well and they wouldn't give it to me because they said they couldn't tell enough by then, but I got one at 8 weeks.

I had my nuchal fold at 11w3d (I had the blood test with it) and the level 2 at 18w3d. For younger people they do the Level II more at like 20 weeks, but that doesn't necessarily allow time to schedule an amnio and get the results and be able to take any drastic action before 24 weeks. Based on the nuchal fold and Level II results we decided against an amnio- we had more of a chance of miscarrying than having a Down's baby so chose not to for this pg. I may be more likely to have an amnio next time around - I was 35y3m when I conceived this time. I will most likely be around 37 next time around.

Before my HSG (that never happened) I was told no BDing from AF until the test incase I ovulated really early for some reason and then I was told that I shouldn't do it for 48 hours after but then to go for it like rabbits since your chances are increased. Is there any stipulations for the SA - are you supposed to or supposed to obstain before DH has to do his deed?

[tsmom]

Melissa -A Huge Congrats to you and DH! I could not be happier!

Elly - "Weight Watchers is like the Catholic Church -- you're always welcome back!" This cracked me up!!

[jlo2be]

Congratulations Melissa! That is awesome news. I hope your betas keep multiplying and I hope the U/S goes well. I've got everything crossed for you. :D

[mobox]

I had my nuchal fold at 11w3d (I had the blood test with it) and the level 2 at 18w3d. For younger people they do the Level II more at like 20 weeks, but that doesn't necessarily allow time to schedule an amnio and get the results and be able to take any drastic action before 24 weeks. Based on the nuchal fold and Level II results we decided against an amnio- we had more of a chance of miscarrying than having a Down's baby so chose not to for this pg. I may be more likely to have an amnio next time around - I was 35y3m when I conceived this time. I will most likely be around 37 next time around.

Please excuse my ignorance, but I have a couple questions. What is a nuchal fold? And what are the chances of miscarrying with from an amnio test?

[Kimmiebride]

The nuchal fold is the fold of skin on the baby's neck. They check for thickness during an U/S, and if it is in a certain range it can indicate less of a risk for down's.

I miscarried my son Robert at 18w3d because of my amnio - it broke my water and I went into labor. Don't think that I'll ever let them do an invasive test when I hopefully get pregnant again. I think the current number nationwide is 1 in 400. Not bad odds, unless you are that one. :(
Kimmie

[pocahontas]

Before my HSG (that never happened) I was told no BDing from AF until the test incase I ovulated really early for some reason and then I was told that I shouldn't do it for 48 hours after but then to go for it like rabbits since your chances are increased. Is there any stipulations for the SA - are you supposed to or supposed to obstain before DH has to do his deed?JESSEY...DH has his SA on Tuesday and our instructions are NO BD for at least 72 hours prior to the SA (although we went longer since AF is here anyway but would probably have abstained longer just for good measure even if the hag hadn't shown up when she did.) HTH.

[pixielou]

kimmie i didn't realize that you lost robert due to your amnio. i somehow missed that part when i read about your loss.

i've always thought of an amnio as a relatively "safe" proedure - but now, seeing the statistics "come alive" - i'm definitely readjusting my thinking of the subject.

~pixie

[margiepgh]

kimmie - I didn't realize that the amnio triggered your premature labor. Thank you for sharing that with us. :( I guess these procedures aren't as safe as we might believe. I know that Eliezrah's daughter was born 12 weeks premature after she had an amnio.

kimmie - How are you doing?

melissa - I hope all went well with your u/s.

[melissafromnc]

Thanks for all of your well wishes. We didn't get good news at our us on Friday. My beta is still going up but we couldn't see anything in the uterus. We didn't see anything out of the uterus so I guess that was good at least. I'm trying to rely on pixielou's RE's advice who likes the beta to be above 2000 before us. Our beta was 1863 on Friday. Repeat beta and us Monday am. Continued limbo and waiting for us.

Hope everyone else had a better weekend than we did.

kimmie I didn't realize that the amnio caused Robert's loss as well. That's tragic.

[stars]

kimmie I wanted to thank you for being so brave and sharing your loss with us.

melissa I have EVERYTHING crossed over here for ya and really hope it all works out. Please keep us posted.

[melissafromnc]

Well, no good news today. Ultrasound was negative again. Beta has risen to nearly 5000 (which should definitely show something in uterus and now we're approaching much more risky ectopic numbers). We've scheduled a radiologic ultrasound at the hospital tomorrow am and will go straight from there to the clinic upstairs. We've done all the necessary bloodwork for methotrexate if we end up needing to do that tomorrow. They weren't happy about letting us out of the building today so I'm guessing they might forcibly restrain us tomorrow.

[Astro]

melissafromnc dang. I'm so sorry to hear you guys are going through this. I was so hoping your story would turn out different. I'll keep you and your dh in our prayers.

[Kimmiebride]

Oh, Mel... I'll continue to hope for you. It wrenches my gut that nothing seems to just come frigging easily to those of us who have suffered so much.

I am surviving. Today is my due date. All the what ifs and if only's... I gotta say, I am really tired of seeing people I care about struggle, lose and grieve. God, if you're listening, can we have a miracle for Melissa PLEASE??? I don't know how many more tears we have left to shed.
Kimmie

PS I am very thankful that we have some success stories here too, and certainly don't want to minimize our collective joy about that, and really appreciate everyone who has given me such warm support... it's just that right now the sadness is a bit overwhelming. :(

[Fireside Girl]

Melissa,
You know I am hoping against hope that the outcome is not what the doctors suspect. Please be careful. And let us know what happens tomorrow at the scan.

Kimmie,
I am so sorry for your pain.

[Maxicat]

Melissa,

My beta was 30,000 and they only saw a sack. I don't think they would have seen anything at 5,000.

Well I am thinking about you. I hope this works.

[ejs]

The nuchal fold is the fold of skin on the baby's neck. They check for thickness during an U/S, and if it is in a certain range it can indicate less of a risk for down's.

I miscarried my son Robert at 18w3d because of my amnio - it broke my water and I went into labor. Don't think that I'll ever let them do an invasive test when I hopefully get pregnant again. I think the current number nationwide is 1 in 400. Not bad odds, unless you are that one. :(
Kimmie

Kimmie, DH and I haven't even officially stuck our toes in the TTC pool, but this is a huge concern of mine. I'm so sorry you experienced it.

I hope it's ok to ask this: Would you do a CVS (Chorionic villus sampling) test with your next pregnancy?

[Kimmiebride]

EJS, absolutely no way... the CVS is more dangerous than the amnio because it's more invasive and done earlier in the pregnancy when it's a bit more fragile. It's a tough decision that each couple and their genetic counselors need to make on their own... I am not saying you shouldn't do it, just that I won't put myself through that again. My neighbor had amnios with both her kids, and everything is fine. She was convinced that something would happen with her current pregnancy after what I went through, but the procedure was fine.
Kimmie

[ejs]

EJS, absolutely no way... the CVS is more dangerous than the amnio because it's more invasive and done earlier in the pregnancy when it's a bit more fragile. It's a tough decision that each couple and their genetic counselors need to make on their own... I am not saying you shouldn't do it, just that I won't put myself through that again. My neighbor had amnios with both her kids, and everything is fine. She was convinced that something would happen with her current pregnancy after what I went through, but the procedure was fine.
Kimmie

Kimmie, thanks for replying. My asking the question was definitely putting the cart before the horse. As I said, DH and I are standing on the edge of the TTC pool, but not quite ready to jump in.

We know that it will be a challenge because of our ages, so a big goal for me is to try to stay positive and not stress too much.

[melissafromnc]

Thanks again for the kind words and support. We got confirmation of the ectopic today and seeing it on the ultrasound made it a lot easier to take the methotrexate. It at least gave us the resolution we needed and allowed us to feel confident in our decision. Now we wait, have more bloodwork, then try like hell to not let this happen again.

[Maxicat]

Melissa, I am so sorry.

[pocahontas]

WOW. I know no words makes this any better. {{{HUGS}}}

[tsmom]

Melissa - I am so terrible sorry, take care of yourselves.

[CapeCod04]

I'm so sorry Melissa.

[Kimmiebride]

Oh, honey, soooo sorry. Please call me if you need to talk. I know you have a lot of support, but I want you to know I am here for you! I guess it's better to know than not to, but I sure wished like heck that it wouldn't be this outcome, of course, no more than you and E were wishing.
love,
Kimmie

[Fireside Girl]

Melissa,
I am so so sorry.:(

[jlo2be]

I'm sorry, Melissa.

[Bastille]

Melissa - As I posted to you elsewhere this just plain and simple sucks. I am so sorry for both you and your hubby. Hopefully the increased vigilance by Dr. F will help your physical health and future ttc plans. I am so sorry and saddened by this after everything else that has happened. Perhaps we should start an ectopic thread - on this thread now you've had 2, I've had 1 and I think pixie has had 1 too - any others? Just let me know when you want to get together - the Swedish meatballs at IKEA are calling out my name. Love and Hugs to you and E.

Kimmie - Your post about your due date really touched my heart. I am so sorry for all the pain you have been through. I hope you are healing physically and emotionally at the pace that is right for you. How have you been physically - did you call Chris at Dr. B's? I did talk to her about you and she had some thoughts on your current health situation - perhaps we can talk soon and catch up.

[Kimmiebride]

Bastille!! I have been thinking alot about you lately too, and hope you are doing ok! Physically I AM feeling better - coincidentally from the time I got pissed at all this nonsense and decided to take my life back from the clot monsters!!! I haven't spoken to Chris yet (ducks and hides!). I know. I am a bad girl. But I am planning on doing it, especially since I am throwing caution to the wind and hope to ttc starting next month. I will definitely seek the wisdom of Dr. B in light of that situation! I was also going to seek a second opinion from the hematologist at Stanford, but I think Dr. B is more the right person for me. I have been busy with photography, out of town for a few weeks, and now am back and ready to check things out. Thanks for the info - am interested to hear what Chris said to you, and I look forward to seeing you. I really miss you!! Maybe coffee at Starbucks in Belmont next week? or whereever. If Mel is up for swedish meatballs say the word and I am there!
hugs,
Kimmie

[stars]

Melissa BIG HUGS to you, I am so sorry.

[Bellefior]

Melissa, I will be keeping you and you family in my thoughts and prayers.

[margiepgh]

Oh Melissa. I am so very sorry.:(

[mobox]

Melissa, big hug to you. Keep your chin up!

[ellybelle]

Oh, Melissa, I'm so very sorry. It just sucks so much! Take care of yourself.

[stars]

Just checkin to see how everyone is doing this weekend. Melissa thinking of you and hope that you are hanging in there.

After 7 cycles, I've decided that it's time to go back to the RE. I made my appt. for May 9th and I am excited to get the ball rollin. Going to use a different doctor that was highly recommended to me this time around, that drive to my old one was an hour for me each way and really can't do that now that I have a toddler. So we'll see how this goes.

Thinking of you ladies and hope all is well.

[LeighW]

Oh no, Melissa. So incredibly unfair. I'm so sorry. Thinking of you and your family.

Kim, I didn't know your amnio caused your loss either. :( I'm sorry your due date was rough. I had a loss last summer, much earlier than yours, but my due date in January sucked all the same. I really, really wanted to be pregnant again by then but it was not to be.

Take care, girls.

[Bastille]

Hello -

I've been a bit MIA from this thread although I must say I have been a faithful lurker:D

First off I want to congratulate Tsmom for Drake's birth - I LOVE that name. How wonderful to have a baby boy and little girl. I truly hope all is well and would love to hear more although I respect your privacy. I have always been so happy for your success and your "story" is one that I had always hoped would happen to me. All the best to you and your babies!

Fireside Bonnie - I am also so happy to read that everything is going well with your pregnancy!!

I feel like this thread is a reunion of the ole WC ttc 35 thread with so many of you ttc #2 - all the best to Margie, Stars, PixieLou, Jlo2Be, EllyBelle.

Along with Melissa and Kimmie I am pursuing #1 and damn we are tenacious n'est-ce pas?

I apologize if I missed others but I will catch up on your individual journey.

_______________
I have been trying to decide my ttc plans and recently started getting tests done to give it another shot - life has not been easy and many of my plans have been cancelled or postponed due to family crisises/emergencies of which I will update you all later.

Unfortunately I had some very sad news on Monday - the wonderful Dr. Beer passed away. He has been my reproductive immunologist who I have been seeing for about 3 years - he has diagnosed my natural killer cells in my uterus, my APA, my clotting disorder and in effect he saved my life last March when he was the one who marched me right into the emergency room with a beta of about 8,000 at 8 weeks which was still climbing whereas my ob-gyn was telling me that I was having a natural m/c and told me to stop getting betas. Because of Doctor Beer I knew better and kept getting my betas checked and ended up almost having a ruptured tube and had to have it removed. This has been really a bummer because it appears that my right ovary is the one that works and I was getting pregnant naturally quite frequently although m/c (4x in 2 years) - now with a left tube and not so great left ovary I have not been pregnant in over a year.

I am very sad and the immunologysupport yahoo thread has been extremely sad and respectful as people are commenting on how Dr. Beer changed their lives and was the only doctor who gave them hope as he did to me. I feel honored to have meet him and to have worked with him. I just wanted to pay tribute to him somehow and I know some of you have read about my issues on this thread and the treatments that I received through him. He has also treated a number of celebrities which is just coming out now that he is gone such as Courtenay Cox, Helen Hunt, etc.

God Bless You Dr. Beer.

[Bellefior]

Well, we finally had all the testing results completed and my OB/GYN called me. I should have known something was up when she called me directly and not the nurse. My tests all came back ok (which I knew from last week). However, she wanted to discuss DH's SA with me. Turns out that all of his counts were low. I remember her mentioning number and motility and to be honest, I don't remember much else that she said after that because I was so upset. She was very sympathetic, but also said that she had to refer us to an RE, since she couldn't do anything else for us. I was hoping it would not come to this, since my insurance does cover infertility treatments, but doesn't cover IVF, IUI or anything invasive. They are going to call me back with the RE appointment.

This just has not been the best of days. I'm sitting here in my office crying and I can't even leave for the day because I absolutely have to be here. We also found out today that my MIL has to go in for a repeat mammogram. DH also finds out the results of the bar exam tonight and is now convinced that he didn't pass so we can be hit with the triple whammy. This just plain sucks. It wasn't easy to tell DH the news, and I debated whether or not to hold off telling him given everything else that's going on today.

Anyway, that's where we are right now. Hopefully, when we visit the RE, they'll have more answers for us.

[pocahontas]

DANG BELLEFIOR...that does really suck (although I will still hold out hope for your DH for the Bar at least.) Now I am worried because you and I went through all the same testing at the same time. So I wonder what my RE will say. My appt. isn't until the 18th. So I am trying to hold out these 2 weeks until I can see her in person rather than calling her to have her read me some over the phone results. I hope things get better for you soon! Chin up!

[stars]

Bastille So great to see you on the boards, we all go so far back to planning our weddings and then the creation of the 35+ on the WC and I do think of you often. I'm glad to read that you have not given up your dream, I know it is out there for you, no matter how you choose to get him or her. I pray that it happens for you and your DH, you both really do deserve it (everyone does) but after all that you two have been through, you truly are an inspiration. On another note, I'm so sorry to read about Dr. Beer, I know how well respected the man was. Perfect example of a person there that would not want you to give up either :)

Bellefior I hope I will make you feel better to tell you that you are in better hands going to an RE. Not only did I have issues ... but my DH had some big ones with his "boyz" as well . You are going to the people that truly have the expertise in these areas. I know it's just one step that you don't want to have to go, but I feel strongly that if I didn't take that step three years ago, I would not have my beautiful son. Hang in there, be patient and let us know how everything goes at your appt.

HUGS to the rest of you.

[LeighW]

Bastille~nice to hear from you. I remember you from lurking on the WC 35+ thread long ago. And I also remember looking at your beautiful wedding photos. I'm sad to hear of the loss of Dr. Beer. He sounded like a great doctor and wonderful human being.

Bellefior~What an awful day for you. I'm not much of an expert on MF issues, but I know several couples IRL who had similar issues and got pregnant with IUI and IVF. I think you will feel much better after meeting with the RE and deciding on a game plan. Also, I posted about BCBS fed insurance several pages back. It won't cover the IUI or IVF procedure itself, but it will cover all the pre-procedure monitoring and the drugs, which are a huge part of the expense, especially for an IUI.

Hope your DH got good news on the bar exam!

Stars~good luck with the RE. I also chose an RE close to home for the same reason, although I've been going the alternative medicine route instead.

[Bellefior]

Thanks for the thoughts everyone. When I spoke to my doctor yesterday, I did ask for a repeat analysis and she said she would arrange for that/its probably something the RE would want anyway while we are waiting for the RE appointment. I actually had a call on my voicemail at work this morning from the hospital, so I called and left them a message giving both my office and cell phone numbers.

Leigh thanks for the info on what Federal BCBS does cover. I actually called them yesterday on the advice of my OB (she knows about my insurance issues) and got the same info you did, that they cover all the pre-procedure stuff for IUI and IVF-- ie., blood work, ultrasounds, drugs, and any tests or labs related to the procedure-- just not the actual procedure itself so that cuts the cost somewhat. They actually have someone in the RE unit whose job it is to deal with insurance issues and I am sure I am not the first Fed who went to them for treatment so they will know what's up.

Unfortunately, DH didn't get the bar results he was hoping for either. It was something like a 40% pass rate for those who took it which is abysmally low. We can't figure it out since he has been practicing in another state for 5+years and studied his a$$ off. They actually posted the results on line, so we aren't sure what the letter they are sending him will say or if they tell you how close he came to passing. He has two weeks though to register to take it again in July if he wants to.

Given everything that happened yesterday, DH and I remembered this quote by Matthew Broderick from "The Freshman"--"There's a kind of freedom in being completely screwed, because you know things can't possibly get any worse." We actually were able to laugh when he remembered the quote and as I told DH, we are at such a low point right now that it can only get better from here on in.

[ejs]

I feel like I'm intruding with this post because you all seem like such a tight group. But I hope you have room for one more.

DH and I have decided to begin TTC this month. I'm 38, he's 39. We actually went through genetic testing last fall. I bought a Clearplan Fertility Monitor because I don't think we want to get into the temping right now.

I feel like we're starting a huge uphill battle because of our ages. Sigh.

[margiepgh]

ejs - I've added you to the roster. You're definitely not intruding. The more the merrier. As far as the uphill battle, you just never know what is in store. I conceived my first after about 5-6 months of trying at the age of 39 (and gave birth at 40), and know of others with a similar experience. You really just don't know until you try. I wish you the best of luck on your journey.:)

Bellefior - I'm sorry to hear about the tough round of news. If you eventually need to go for IUI, the cost of the actual procedure is relatively small (a few hundred dollars) compared to the thousands required for the injectibles/ultrasounds/bloodwork/monitoring.

Bastille - As always, it's great to hear from you again. I'm sorry to hear that you're plans have been impacted by family situations. I'm also sorry to hear about the passing of Dr. Beer. It sounds like he had a great impact on your life.


-------

Nothing much new with me. I'm just waiting to O and planning to start with injectibles next cycle (if this natural cycle doesn't result in a BFP). I have a cycle management class on Saturday and plan get my prescription phoned in next week.

Yesterday, I recieved a copy of "The Infertility Cure" by Randine Lewis and plan to read it over the upcoming weeks. It got pretty good reviews on Amazon. Has anybody else read it?

[Fireside Girl]

Bellefior
I'm sorry about your DH's bar results. Great Matthew Broderick quote, though.

ejs
There's always room for more. This is a great group of women.

Bastille
Thanks so much for thinking of me. I feel very blessed that so far I have had a very boring pregnancy. This week I started feeling the baby move, which is so cool, it feels like popcorn going off in my stomach. Also, we ordered a crib and dresser last weekend which just felt like such a big deal because of my miscarriage history. Hopefully my starting to relax and enjoy this pregnancy is not a harbinger of doom.

I'm sorry to read of Dr. Beer's passing. I know that he helped you and countless other women quite a bit.

I can't wait to read news of you having baby #1. I know that it will happen for you and the rest of the tenacious bunch.

Liana and Melissa
You are both in my thoughts. How are you doing?

pocahontas
Good luck at your appointment the 18th!

Hello and hugs to everyone else!

[melissafromnc]

firesidegirl So nice to hear about a boring pregnancy. May it continue! Yay for a crib and a dresser.

ejs Welcome!! You're not intruding at all. Good luck with the fertility monitor. I found it sooooooo much easier to use than temping. Maybe I'm just lazy.

margieph I read the Randine Lewis book back when it first came out. I also have a couple of friends who've gone on her incredibly expensive retreats. I think some of the info is pretty good. I don't like how she charges so much for her services but she does have a number of satisfied customers.

bellefior Such a tough week you're having! I'm so sorry to hear about that. If you do another SA the one thing I'd recommend is finding a lab that uses the Kruger Strict Morphology standards. They are the only consistent morphology criteria that exist. I'm sorry to learn of your male factor, and that can be really hard on guys, but you will have a variety of options once you see an RE and the great news is that treatment (iuis and ivf perhaps with icsi) can be VERY successful. It totally stinks that you're self-pay but there are ways to keep costs down (Freedom Drugs in your state is one way). Many of the rest of us are also self-pay and can relate to the struggles involved with that. And if you're just having to pay for the procedure, then it's really not that much (drugs, ultrasounds and bw are a HUGE part of any cycle).

bastille So good to see you here. I thought of you when I heard about Dr Beers the other day. I wish you all the best in your upcoming cycle.

stars Yay for finding a closer RE. I hear you on the long trek to Dr Check. Maybe they can use some of the same protocols? Whatever they do I hope you have great success.

Hi to pocahantas, leigh, tsmom, kimmie, ellybelle, pixielou and anyone else I'm forgetting.

~~~~~
As for my update, it really hasn't been a fun time around my house lately. The first shot of methotrexate didn't do the job so I had another dose on Tuesday. My RE gives it a 50% chance of working but I think he's being overly optimistic. Most of my friends who've had 2 doses end up having the surgery in addition to the drugs. I suppose the good news is that my liver and kidneys still seem to be functioning ok (at least so far). I go in for more bloodwork tomorrow and again on Monday. And hope to stay fairly asymptomatic and stable until then. I was in a fair amount of pain yesterday and felt really crappy but not bad enough to go to the er.

If we don't need surgery next week, then I'll plan for another hsg as soon as I have a normal cycle and we'll talk surgical options for preventing a 3rd ectopic. I'm sure any sane person would just have the other tube removed at this point but that's a really hard thing for me to consider. It means giving up all hope of a natural pregnancy. Actually it means giving up all hope of my own genetic children. Ever. I thought I was ready to do that but I just don't think I'm quite there.

[Bellefior]

Thanks Melissa. I guess my whole thing about being ticked at my insurance/employer is because I live in MA, one of the few states that mandates IVF coverage, but because I work for the Federal Government, they can get away with a technicality by saying that are not a MA employer and limit their coverage. It just galls me to know if I worked anywhere else in MA, I would not be paying at all. It also annoys me to no end to know that if a woman working in the private sector in MA came into my office with this issue, we would probably be suing the employer for limiting the coverage. How ironic is that.

I'd be as lot less upset and have an easier time sucking up or dealing with the cost issue if I wasn't living and working in a state where any other employer would have to cover this type of thing. It's something I'm going to have to learn to deal with because I can't keep have this feeling of anger--it's not productive and it's not going to change the situation either.

Thanks for letting me vent (yet again) girls.

[Bellefior]

Just wanted to update something else that happened during the aforementioned day/night from hell involving DH's best friend (or should I say former best friend). This is long, but is related to TTC.


M, was in the house painting our master and spare bedrooms. He's done painting before, is good at it, and we agreed to pay him (something like $200 plus we would give him lunch and dinner). Well M and DH always joke around with each other. I don't recall what DH said to him ( it was so innocuous that I don't even remember it), but to "get back" at him M made a really sarcastic cutting comment about DH's low counts. It wasn't said even as a joke, it was intended to be very cruel, DH started to say something to him to tell him off but before DH could really get into it, I completely went off on him at the top of my lungs using lots of profanity (not in my character). M has a habit of making comments that he thinks are funny but are downright cruel, and I think he deliberately means to hurt people with his comments.

Anyway, we calmed down, he gave a half-assed apology which I accepted in the interest of maintaining the peace. But then he did something else and DH just finally had enough with his BS because its always something with this guy. He had been drinking all the beer in our fridge over the two days he was there and basically thought he would have a party at our place for 3-4 days and paint walls in between when he felt like it. Since we were paying him, and he was dragging his a$$ in addition to making us feel like we had to walk on eggshells around him, that was not okay with us. So DH threw him out of the house, told him get his $hit, and not to come back.

He then tried to say to me when he came back for his coat that he had left behind , and to justify the comment he had made, by saying that my husband had "hurt his feelings" and that this was between my husband and him, and didn't involve me, but I told him when he was in my house, creating chaos, insulting my husband and making jokes about the fact we are having trouble conceiving naturally, then it does involve me. I told him that I realized DH could be a jerk, but that he (M) could also punch people's buttons with his comments. I told him that if all his bad day consisted of was getting all pi$$y about some comment that DH made that no one else would have ever thought twice about, then I did not feel sorry for him. That he should walk in our shoes because we had it all over him when it came to having a bad day--between MIL having to go in for a second mammogram because of something they saw, the news from my OB about us having to see an RE, and the bar exam results. He gave me a look that all I could say scared me because it was so full of anger (I think he expected me to take his side), then stalked off.

We've always been good to M. I told DH that if he wanted to make up with him that was fine, and maybe someday I might be able to forgive the cruel comment, but that for present he was no longer welcome in our house and if he chose to get together with him, it would not be at my house. I have enough stress in my life w/o toxic people adding to it. Am I being out of line here?

[mobox]

I'm sorry to hear about your doctor, Dr. Beer. He sounds like a truly wonderful man.

[margiepgh]

Melissa - I'm so sorry to hear that you're having to go through so much with this ectopic. :( I hope and pray that the second shot works so that you can start the healing process.

[LeighW]

Melissa~I also hope the second shot works. What an ordeal for you, after all you've been through. Sending you healing thoughts. Take care.

[pixielou]

bastille i'm so sorry to hear about dr. beer. i know how much you respected and trusted this man.

melissa sending lots of e-hugs and e-love your way. thinking of you lots.

bellefior i'm sorry to hear about all the heartbreak in your home these days. as others have said, going to the re is tough - but it really is the best place for you - the specialist you need. as i've said before - going to the re is a lot like going to see a psychiatrist - it is tough to admit you have a problem. here you are - a grown mature woman, financially and emotionaly stable, homeowner, happily married - you've got everything going for you - yet you can't seem to get pregnant. getting pregnant - something that any 21 year old, unemployed, unmarried drug addit seems to be able to do without even trying.

~pixie

[stars]

melissa Thinking of you and hope you are feeling better .. sending you a big hug!

bellefior Also hope things are better for you this week. We are only given as much as we can handle (who said this anyway) and truly believe good things are coming your way :)

As for me, went to a new RE yesterday. He really isn't "high-FSH" friendly, will only work with me if my FSH is under 12. He also wants to do the clomid challenge test with me and women with high FSH don't do well on that test because it makes your FSH higher and you get a false reading. So I'm going back to Dr. Check June 2nd for a consult. Ya he is far away but I'll just have to suck it up!!!

Anywho, hope everyone is doing well.

[melissafromnc]

Just a very quick driveby post to say thanks to all of you for your support and kind words. Really means a ton. The second shot of methotrexate seems to be doing the trick and my beta is now falling (down to about 6k from a high of over 10k). I also got a bonus ultrasound last Friday because I looked really pale and shaky and they were concerned about a rupture. Good news was everything looked good. Better news was they okayed my roadtrip to SoCal tomorrow (no planes or trains for a while but cars are okey dokey). We soooooo need the break.

bellefior What a jerk your dh's friend was. I totally think you did the right thing. You don't need people like that in your life ever, but especially now.

stars You're gonna be a Check Chick AGAIN!!! I know it's a long drive but it sounds like the perfect place for you. Especially if the other RE isn't high FSH friendly. Bah humbug on the clomid challenge. Hope Check doesn't keep you there till the middle of the night.

Hope everyone else is well. Could really use some good news in this thread. Anyone wanna volunteer?

[pocahontas]

As for me, went to a new RE yesterday. He really isn't "high-FSH" friendly, will only work with me if my FSH is under 12. He also wants to do the clomid challenge test with me and women with high FSH don't do well on that test because it makes your FSH higher and you get a false reading. So I'm going back to Dr. Check June 2nd for a consult. Ya he is far away but I'll just have to suck it up!!!

Anywho, hope everyone is doing well.
Hi STARS...just curious about what the "Clomid Challenge Test" is. I have never been on Clomid but I am trying to learn as much as possible about it lately due to some things my RE has found with my recent tests. Thanks in advance.

[stars]

pocahontas I'm glad I popped back in here before logging off for the evening to answer your question. I will try and answer your question correctly and I'm sure some of our other knowledgable ladies can help also to clarify.

The Clomid Challenge Test is a tool to determine your ovarian reserve. Your blood is taken on days 2,3 or 4 of your cycle. This is followed by taking Clomid days 5-9. Blood is then repeated on day 10 or 11. What they look for is your FSH (Follicle Stimulating Hormone) to be under 13 the first blood draw and then even lower after you take the clomid. I guess this helps them determine how many "eggs" you have left and what your chances are to conceiving.

In my case I know I have high FSH (although it varies from cycle to cycle) so this test would just reinforce what I already know, could make my FSH higher (from the clomid) and show this new doctor that I would not be a good candidate for IUI/IVF. There are doctors out there that don't believe having high FSH means you can't get preggo ... I found Dr. Check and got pregnant my first IUI.

I hope I answered your question, let me know if there is anything else.

[melissafromnc]

pocahantas Not that you asked me, but I thought I'd give my 2 cents on the Clomid Challenge test. I think it's fairly worthless. Many REs will use it as a means to determine whether or not they'll let you cycle (these are the non-high FSH friendly ones). It's actually not a good measure of ovarian reserve. It's more a measure of how you might respond to drugs (but really, only how you'll respond to Clomid). The best predictor of ovarian reserve is antral follicle counts (especially early in your cycle before a dominant follicle has the chance to develop). Some REs will have folks do the Clomid Challenge test even if they have high FSH. There's no reason to do the Clomid Challenge test if your cd2-3 fsh is over 10, only if it's under 10. They want to see if your fsh goes down on CD 10 after clomid.

BTW if you ever asked to do bloodwork and suspicious you might have high fsh, always do it on the latest day possible. FSH will be highest earlier on so CD2 will be higher than CD3 and CD4 will be even lower. Just a bit of advice.

[tsmom]

Bastille - Thank you so much for the congrats! Drake is a gift and aside from some GI issues he is thriving. I am so sorry to hear about Dr. Beer, I know that he had great impact on your ttc and he will be missed.

Melissa - Glad to hear that shot #2 is doing what it should. Come on down - the weather is going to be beautiful! Think it is a good 80 out right now!

bellefior - We are all too busy for "friends" like that. Good for you trying to keep positive people around you.

Stars - Check's magic has worked one time I am sure he still has some dust in his wand for #2.

I am cheering you guys on over here and trying to get some sleep!

[Sebski]

I hope you don't mind my butting in w/ this post, but I was just told by my gyno that I have an FSH level of 12... I'm turning 30 next month. My mother started menopause at 33 and my sister was just diagnosed as pre-menopausal last fall and she's 31. I'm hoping that you could shed some light on the FSH thing for me. The nurse who just gave me my results asked if we have any children yet and I told her yes, a 6 month old and she said "oh, good". She sounded relieved and told me to come in next month again on day 3 to see where I'm at again. What does all of this mean? For those of you w/ a high FSH - can it go lower? :confused:

[stars]

Hi Sebski

Melissa is our resident expert on "high-FSH" so check back to see if she answers your post in depth.

The first time my FSH was taken it was a 14, I was given the "1% chance of having a child speech" so I found a different doctor. The second time my FSH was taken it was a 9. So YES it can change from month to month. As Melissa stated above, it can also change within your cycle days of testing 2 thru 4 so the later you can get it tested the better.

There is a GREAT message board just for high-FSH

http://www.network54.com/Forum/209394/

Hope this information helps you.

Hang in there ... it CAN happen ... my DS is living proof!!!!

[mobox]

Hey Melissa, have a great trip and get some rest and relaxation.

[Bastille]

I wanted to shout out a Happy Mothers Day to those that are Mothers and those that will be Mothers (so that should cover everyone that follows this thread). :D

My ttc journey has been long and oftentimes wearisome with plenty of ups and downs. As much has transpired in my life during this last year of non conception it has given me time to contemplate and ponder my feelings of:
being a mom to a genetic child
being a mom to non genetic child (via egg or embryo donation)
being a mom to an adopted child
not being a mom.

Melissa has told me numerous times it is always best to have a plan. What stands out most to me is that I want to be a mom and I am still attached to the genetic link portion; consequently, I will be doing IVF in August. Granted, my chances at 43 are not so hot, but I am doing this to either have a genetic child, or, if not, then relinquish the genetic link portion knowing that I did everything I could to have a child who is genetically linked to me.

Bottom line is that I will be a mom somehow, someday.

[margiepgh]

Hi Bastille - I think you've got a great plan. I think it's hard to give up the prospect of a genetic child, before first giving it your all. Where are you planning to do your IVF cycle?

Melissa - I hope you had (or are having) a great vacation. :)

Stars - How far do you live from Dr. Check's office? Maybe you could have your local RE do the monitoring to cut down on the commute.

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Well, my medications were delivered for my first injectibles cycle yesterday. They include Follistim AQ, an hcg trigger, and prog. suppositories (lovely:rolleyes: ). The RE's office also got insurance approval for Ganarelix, but it hasn't been added to my protocol yet. When AF arrives, I need to call the RE's office and arrange for CD3 testing. If all is a go, my starting dose of Follistim is going to be 225 IU. AF is due to arrive next Tuesday (unless I happen to be preggers), so it is just right around the corner. In spite of the inconvenience of going to the RE's office for bloodwork and ultrasound and the discomfort of doing injections, I am actually looking forward to doing something different (because what I am doing now is not working).

[melissafromnc]

I'm back from a busy but fun long weekend in SoCal. One of the highlights of the trip was seeing Steven Spielberg who got a special demo of my dh's game. He was wearing a baseball cap just like I figured he would be.:D

I just got the call from my clinic and my beta is now below 1000! What a relief that it's falling so fast. I never thought that would be as reassuring to me as it is. Now I need to schedule a consult with my local RE and devise a plan to get this other tube out (and any remnants of the first one and plug any holes). My risk for a third ectopic is now >50%, for any kind of pregnancy. As much as I'm attached to my tube I just can't live in a state of constant worry for the next few years/decade or so.

margieph Congrats on your new drug stash! The pen is sooooo easy to use. The best thing about Folllistim is that you can actually get more bang for your buck (by using the extra bit in the cartridge). Not that you need to with that great insurance.

bastille So very nice to see you here, my friend. Sounds like you've been doing some deep thinking. The genetic connection is a tough thing to give up so I completely understand your need to do an ivf with your own eggs. I do have a friend of a friend who's now in her third trimester (or late in her second) through an ivf at age 44. It does happen, even if it feels like the stats aren't on your side. I wish great luck for you and we're all on your side. You will be a mom someday. That's a great thing to focus on.

sebski Hey there! I remember you from the WC days. I think we both had Art Deco weddings. I was in awe of yours. stars gave you some excellent advise with the network54 link. If you go there, there's also a link to another board for folks with high fsh and secondary infertility (not that you have that yet but you might be able to relate to those women as many of them don't find out about the high fsh until after they've had a child). For a lot of women, their fsh numbers bounce around a lot. Don't get too hung up with what your number is. One of our members on this thread is now in her second trimester with an fsh of 44. It can and does happen all the time. The most important thing is to find a high fsh friendly doc. Typically, this will be an RE not an obgyn. I think you're in SoCal, right? I don't know how close you are to Glendale or Orange County but Dr Acacio at SIRM is supposed to be great. SIRM and the Cooper Center where stars is going are the two best clinics for high fshers. They have completely opposing ideas about how to work with high fshers but they both get pretty good results. The best news for you is that you're still young. Most docs will treat you by your highest level and don't let that get to you. Acupuncture can help a lot. High FSH does not mean that you poor egg quality. Many docs will say that but most REs don't believe that. It does mean that you have a feedback loop that's out of whack and that you may have fewer eggs than a woman with lower fsh. It also means that the normal way that REs treat women might not work as well for you. Injectible gonadatropins, the drugs used for iuis and ivfs, are all FSH. The goal by using them is to increase your fsh so you produce more follicles. If your fsh is already high, it's like you're pressing the gas pedal down and you can only press it so far.

I used to have this awesome spreadsheet with successes that a friend sent to me. If you wanna see it, pm me and I'll try to dig it up. THERE IS A LOT OF HOPE and reason to hope. I can talk about this for days so feel free to pm me or email me about anything. I hope you and your sister join the ranks of the high fsh success stories.

tsmom Thanks for the warm weather down your way but where was the sun??? It was foggy/overcast our whole trip. I was able to cheer myself up with some adorable shops in Venice, thank goodness for shopping.

Hope everyone is having a good week.