IVF Anyone? Part 3

[kischer]

jules-I am thinking of you. I have been through that too many times, if you need anything please PM me. mucho mucho ((((((hugs)))))))!

[gymwidow]

Well, I just sent off the paperwork to ARC to pay for our IVF cycle. $10,091.13. :eek: Yikes. Our friend the GYN talked to my RE and asked if there was anything he could do to reduce our costs, and my RE said he would look into it, but I'm not counting on anything. At most, it would just be great if he could see that they code my b/w and u/s so that I can get reimbursed for those by my ins. co. But we're not expecting it, so if it happens it will just be a pleasant surprise.

Last week my best friend gave me a check and told me that she and her DH were helping us pay for IVF, no questions asked. She refused to take it back. I couldn't believe it. She knows the financial troubles we've had in the past and told her DH how much we had to pay for the cycle and all he said to her was "How much do you want to give them?" I started crying when she did it. My own FIL, who promised us a huge chunk of money 2 years ago, and then never came through (our reliance on that empty promise is what led us into financial trouble, which we just got out of), couldn't even get it together to help his only son, and here we have people who aren't even related to us just giving us money when we need it most. I don't even have words to describe how amazing this couple is and how much they mean to us and what they did means to us. We're trying to write them a letter telling them all of that, and it's hard to find the words that go deep enough!

I had my bimonthly massage therapy appointment today at noon and it was awesome! I made an appt for my DH to go next week. He deserves a little therapy, too! :)

[julesp313]

I'm sorry to keep skipping shout outs but I'm sure you can imagine I'm not really feeling up to it just now. I hate that every time I post, I have crappy news, but that's what my IVF experience is - crappy.

Today's beta was 59 - that's a 50% increase from 48 hours ago. Not quite where it should be. The other RE in the practice called me today and said that they like to see a 60% increase every 48 hours, so I'm about 15 behind where I should be. He said there is a 90% chance this will end in an early miscarriage but as long as the levels keep rising, he can't rule out that rare occurrance of low and slow rising betas resulting in a healthy pregnancy. I'm to stay on the meds and go for a repeat on Monday. If the levels keep rising, I stay on the meds until they get high enough for an ultrasound to determine what's going on. If they stop rising or drop, I stop the meds and miscarry. If I start bleeding, even on the meds, I'm to call and ask to talk to the RE no matter what time of the day or night.

I so, so want this to be over. Knowing the chances are that I'm going to miscarry and all we're doing right now is waiting for that to happen just plain sucks. At least with my first m/c, I had no clue it was going to happen so I wasn't waiting for it. Kinda sucks the life out of you, y'know?

Kischer and Lola - thank you for the kind offer of PMing you - I will probably do that when I'm not working and can think a bit more clearly. I appreciate it.

And to everyone, thank you for the thoughts. They do help, I promise you.

[tigerest]

Jules - :( I agree, that totally sucks. Just wish that after everything we all go through to get to a PG, once we got a + it would all be perfect after that. I am sorry you are still waiting. Don't worry about your posts, that’s what we are here for.

Gymwidow - Good luck with getting the costs reduced. Just a reduction in med costs would be helpful. That is so amazing about your friend. More than just the money, it is such a wonderful gift from her, and really seems like they understand and are supportive. :)

Bellefior - Sorry to hear about the fighting with DH. It happens to the best of us. There is just so much stress and emotional stuff to go through. Hope your DH is willing to see someone with you. It really does help to talk to someone, even if you go by yourself.

Lola - thinking of you.

Suzly - Good for you for standing up for yourself! You have to do with what you feel is right. I really hope this next one works for you! Good luck!

Amy - Hi! I am not entirely clear on the whole prolactin thing yet. Maybe because we are still waiting on tests to come back, to rule out other possible causes. When do you think you would go for #2?

Applebee - How are you doing?

Sebski - Welcome back. Glad your RE is being so thorough! Hope everything goes well with all your bloodwork!

Hi to everyone else! Thinking of you!

[Applebee]

Jules, I'm so sorry....{{{{{HUGS}}}}}

Well, I went ahead and POAS last night and this morning..$ tree brand and it was a BFN. I will continue to test through Sunday but I'm pretty sure IVF #2 didn't work.

If I'm right, I am going to request add'l testing, i.e., autoimmune, antibodies and PGD. I remember before IVF#1 Shady Grove was thinking of PGD, but when my test for the CF gene came back negative (DH has it) either SG didn't need it or the ins company denied it. Well, I just remembered today after my cousin emailed me, that her brother's son has a genetic problem...deletion Q13. I'll be sure to mention this so I can get all the testing I can.

It just seems so unreal to me that you can transfer beautiful embryos/blastocysts and not have beautiful baby(ies) in 9 months. Why can't conceiving be easy for everyone? uh...

[amychris03]

jules (((hugs))) Hope you get some answers soon one way
or the other. I know the waiting is difficult.

Applebee Sorry about the BFN. Crossing my fingers that it
was just too early.

Tigerest Well, trying for #2 depends alot on raising the
funds, but ideally we'd like then about 2 years apart and since
who knows if it will work and when, we'd like to start next
spring... Like Aprilish?

gymwidow How awesome are your friends? That is
amazing.

[Sebski]

Jules I'm so sorry you're going through beta hell right now... <<<hugs>>> I hope there is very good news for you at the end of all the torture.

Applebee so sorry about the BFN... I hope it was just too early to test!

tigerest thanks for the welcome! :) Even though I'm still bruised from it, I'm glad my RE is going overboard w/ the b/w. I want to know as much as possible ya know?

gymwidow oh my gosh what wonderful friends you have! It's so refreshing to hear that story nowadays. Wow! :)

Bellefior sorry to hear that you're fighting w/ DH. It's pretty understandable though w/ emotions running on high when it comes to this whole process. My DH can sometimes come across as 'unsympathetic' as well. Even though my rational side knows it's not the case, my emotions usually get the best of me and it makes for not a good time.

Which brings me to this question... DH and I are obviously just starting out on this journey. Is it normal to feel as if it affects me more than him? I don't intend that to sound selfish, but don't know how else to explain it. He wants to tell his father about the process and I don't want too. FIL and I have a cordial relationship, but we aren't close and because of that, I don't want to let him in on this.. not yet anyway. DH got defensive saying that he's going through it too and it got me thinking... we're doing this because of a problem w/ *me*. I'm not placing blame, but the fact of the matter is, it's a problem w/ *my* body. Shouldn't I be able to say who I want to know about it and who I don't? My mother and 1 sister know about it because a) my mom has to babysit DS for me when I go on these appts and she suspected something was up... I *never* ask for babysitting since I work PT and hate to leave him when I'm not working. And, I need her to watch him because I can't bring him to the RE's office - it's not fair to the ladies in the waiting room. I would hate for them to think I'm parading him around ya know? So, I told her because I don't want her going off the deep end thinking there's something terribly wrong w/ me. and b) my sister is going through this herself. I thought it was only right to let her know that we will be embarking on IVF ourselves so that she could prepare mentally if we are to get pregnant before she does. What could telling FIL accomplish? I just don't want him to know about my body and it's issues. I'm a pretty private person. DH said that he might want to vent to him about things related to it, and I told him to talk to my sister's DH since they're going through the same thing, and he's one of DH's best friends. So, once again, what would telling FIL accomplish? I can't help but feel territorial over this process... I mean, I'm the one who had the 12 vials of blood taken, I'm the one who goes for day 3 testing, I'm the one going today for the saline sono... and, I feel *so* bad thinking this way.

Is it normal this early into things? I mean, I know DH is affected by this whole process as well... but, shouldn't I get to say who knows and who doesn't?

[Bellefior]

Sebski what I can tell you that the social worker told me yesterday is that what she has seen is that women tend to get more emotional about these things and really seem to benefit from talking it out, whereas men tend to be more practical and focus on the appointments and the what do we do and when do we do it aspect.

That being said, we did tell both sets of parents what was going on because we thought they had the right to know (we don't have children yet). In particular, we wanted to make sure FIL knew because he was always asking if we were pregnant every time I said I didn't feel well and it was awkward. My dad fortunately never asks, but we wanted him to know too. We did tell both my ILs and my dad that what we were telling them was in confidence, not to be shared with anyone. We also told them exactly what the issues were. Would it make you feel more comfortable if your DH just said to his dad that you were having issues TTC but left out the specifics of it???

[Tandis]

Sebski - I sort of felt that same way too, because the IF was on *my* part, not DH's. However, I also felt like this was something that we were doing together, because it was affecting both of us, not just me. Your DH might want to tell his Dad, because he feels the need to talk to someone about it, but can't talk to you because you're involved in it as well. Yes, your sister and BIL are going through it, and he might be one of your DH's best friends, but the last person *my* DH wanted to talk to about this was his BF. He made it sound like some man thing, I don't know :rolleyes: If it makes you feel uncomfortable, can you ask your DH not to go into detail about it.

Applebee - {HUGS} Hopefully it's still just too early yet.

Jules - {{HUGS}} So sorry you're still going through this. Don't feel bad about your posts. I think we all understand how very difficult this is for you right now. It's better to let it out, than to keep it in. {{HUGS}} again.

Gymwidow - WOW! That is a heck of a generous friend! Hmm, makes me think DH and I aren't hanging out with the right people ;)

Belle - Sorry to hear about the fights with your DH, but I'm glad to hear about your MIL. When does your DH get his Bar Exam results back?

Suzly - It's so good to *see* you again! I've been thinking about you a lot since your CP, wondering how you were doing. I'm surprised your RE wasn't open to doing another fresh cycle, even though you have some frozen. What difference would that make? Some of the ladies on here have quite a few in "backup" but were still able to do fresh cycles. Hmm, maybe it is time to move on to another clinic, especially if he isn't willing to change protocols.

Waving HI to everyone I missed!

[gymwidow]

jules, continued hugs and prayers for you.

tigerest, exactly. She even offered to take off work and stay home with me after my ER and ET. I'm very lucky to have her.

Applebee, hoping that those sticks start adding lines to them soon! I feel the same way about the whole thing - how can we NOT be pregnant after going through all of this? And how in the world can so many people get pregnant on their own?

amychris, I was blown away. They're incredible.

Sebski, wow is right. :) I think in some ways this whole process definitely affects the woman more. We're the ones getting stuck with all kinds of objects and having to take all kinds of meds. Our emotions are lot more haywire than our partner's are. There's just no way around that. But at the same time, it's something that we go through in many ways as a couple. No matter who has the problem (if there even is one), the ability to have a child and the treatment for IF affects the couple, not just the individual. I understand wanting to keep it private, but it's possible to share with others w/o sharing too much. For instance, my ILs know we're having problems but don't know the details. And they never will, b/c DH and I have agreed to tell them the minimum amount of info possible (I hate them and my DH has only a strained relationship with them, but they were getting very concerned after finding out how many doctor's appts I had been having, so he told them just enough to shut them up and while I wasn't thrilled about it, I understood why he did and believe that it was his choice since they are his parents. However, now that we've moved on to IVF, I wanted us to tell our siblings and while he supported me telling my brother, he doesn't want to tell his sister and I respect that.). You have your mom and sister to talk with, and even though your DH and BIL are close, your DH may not feel as comfortable talking about it with him, maybe even b/c he's going through it too. If he's close to his dad and wants to share, IMHO, I think that's great. He can ask his dad not to mention it to you or let on that he knows (ignorance is bliss and all that; my DH specifically instructed his parents that they are never to bring it up to me at all). A lot of this process will be all about you, but in being there for you, your DH may need someplace else to get his own support and might not want you to feel like you have to provide that for him in addition to everything else you are going through. It's hard not to feel proprietary about the info and about choosing who gets to know, but it's definitely a team project and I think it's so important that both members of the team be 100% involved.

Stepping off of soapbox now.... I hope I didn't offend in any way!

Tandis, lol.


Yesterday we got DH's 4th SA results back and they were the worst ever. His final count post-wash was only 4 million and the motility was only 25%. His results have never been great, but have been "normal" some of the time and borderline others. This may be the reason that all our IUIs failed; we now have PCOS and MFI. So IVF is definitely the right route for us, and we're for sure doing ICSI with it. It's weird, I actually feel better now knowing this. I couldn't understand why the IUIs didn't work and had a hard time just accepting it as one of those things. I was so worried there was some other problem impeding us and that even IVF wouldn't be able to overcome that. But now I feel like IVF WILL succeed and that we'll be pregnant soon!

I told DH after work and he took it okay. He was upset for a while, but I gave him a stern lecture about not blaming himself (like he did with me when we found out I have PCOS) and told him that whatever happened before doesn't matter and that we're doing something now that is much more likely to succeed and that's it. He promised no more self-pitying and seems already back to his optimistic self. He sees the RE's urologist next Thursday to go over everything.

Has anyone else suffered s/e from being on BCP? I went on them for the first time sooooooooooo long ago that I don't remember how I first reacted. But I think they're getting to me now. Blech. Can't wait to stop taking them!

[Bellefior]

Gymwidow my husband had the same issue with one SA being borderline low normal (except for morphology), and two others being terrible straight across the board. When we ask why that happens, they tell us they fluctuate, but we can't figure out why there is such a huge difference.

Jules thinking of you and sending hugs. Keep us posted.

Applebee thinking of you as well.

**********************************

Our appointment for a second opinion for DH is next Weds and we are having all his records sent over from the practice where we currently are. We just can't see committing 100% to the IVF route w/o getting a second opinion on the value of the varicocele surgery for DH first. The RE said the varicocele didn't matter, but from the size of it (4mm) we know that is definitely considered on the large end so we definitely want the second opinion.

We just got a better feeling about this urologist because they were extremely accommodating in getting us the earliest possible appointment when we told them what we were coming in for--secretary said he does not like to keep patients waiting who are coming in for infertility consults. Maybe he will have something different to say, but if not, then we know for sure what we have to do and can be at peace with the IVF route. DH definitely decided if he does opt for the surgery, he wants this other guy to do it because he just did not like the guy we saw at the practice where we are now...they just did not click at all. While it will be inconvenient to have the surgery done out of a different practice, DH just has to be comfortable with whomever is going to do it--we can always get the records sent over to the REs office. Our IF workup is almost entirely complete so we'll be ready to go by September/October if need be. I just hope the RE does not get pissed because we went to see someone completely outside of the hospital where we go now for the second opinion.

Yesterday for the first time ever DH actually showed some emotion about all this. After we finalized the consult for him, he started using a few profanities when mentioning the urologist where we are now and basically said, "Yeah Dr. so and so you blank-blank-blank, bet you didn't bet on my getting a second opinion you blank-blank-blank, you good for nothing blank-blank-blank. If we end up having the surgery and getting pregnant on our own then I will tell you where to go you blankity-blank-blank." I told DH that it actually made me feel good to see him get mad about this and display emotions because it meant he wasn't made out of stone, and that he shouldn't feel the need to bottle it because he views it as a weakness to let it out.

We are also considering maybe joining one of the Resolve support groups. I told DH he was welcome to come with me or stay in the car, but either way, I thought it was something I could benefit from. He said he would consider it, which is a big step that he will even consider it.

[tigerest]

gymwidow - Sorry about you DH's SA. :( but glad you are feeling ok about it. It is nice to have a solid answer now and then. And with ICSI you have a great chance! I had terrible side effects from the BC and hated them too. Mainly terrible headaches and nausea. It sucks because this is normal and usually goes away after being on them for a few months, but we are always on them for only a month. So it stinks.

Applebee - Sorry about the BFN, but it may still be too early! Still holding out hope for you! Hang in there.

amy - Sounds like a good plan! :)

sebski - I know what you are saying about it being you. I did explain that to my DH, that it was not something I wanted everyone to know about. For the most part he has respected that. And when there is someone he wants to tell he tells them when I am not around so I dont have to feel awkward. But I did ask him not to tell his parents that we are doing IVF. I am not that close to them, so they know we are having problems, but don't know all the details. And I think they get it because they never ask. So maybe you could work out some kind of compromise. Like he not talk about it with his dad when you are around, and that he not go into too many details. Its a sensitive issue. And who knows your FIL may not want to hear all the gorey detials. My main issue now....and I dont think its right exactly, is that when DH complains about being tired, I say things like "Your tired! You're not the one being pumped full of meds all the time!". Which isn't fair because he really does try to be understanding. But it is hard even though we are going through this together, it is still me who has the problem.


Still having issues at work. The work nurse called me and asked me why I was missing work if I am in between cycle right now! Grr....OKAY....well the next cycle isnt going to work unless we figure out what went wrong and that takes time!!! I am thinking about asking to cut down to 32 hrs a week, so I dont have to deal with missing work anymore.

[tigerest]

Bellefior - I think a support group is a great idea. I tried finding one near me and there isn't one. But I was able to get a good recommendation for a counselor from resolve.

[Sebski]

Thanks so much ladies for your perspective on things. I truly appreciate it. Part of me is feeling sorta guilty now asking DH to keep it from his dad. But, the other part is telling me that all of this is still pretty new to us yet and that *we* need to own it privately for a bit longer before we share it w/ his dad. See, my mother and sister know about it, but we don't speak about it. It's weird, but that's how it is because they know how private I am. If FIL was to know, he would have no problem asking questions about it all.the.time. Like, how does it work again? Or, remind me how they do this or that w/ it. *sigh* He's a pretty controlling person and, I guess I'm afraid that he'll try to be involved with it somehow. Does that make any sense? Anyway, I'm going to loosen my grip on the situation, I just need some more time to digest it myself.

Had my saline sono today. My uterus is in tip top shape. Now that's something you don't hear every day. ;) The 5cm cyst is pretty much gone so that was great to hear. She also said I have 3 follicles. 2 on my right ovary and 1 on my left - I think she said that the 2 on my right were measuring less than 10... and the left one is very small. She said my left ovary in general is very small for someone my age. Not sure what that means but she didn't sound concerned. But, she was rattling off so many measurements, I felt so unprepared. Is it bad to bring a pen and pencil to my next u/s on the 9th? I want to write things down but am not sure if it's okay to do that while they're going through the measurements or not.

Anyway, are 3 follicles at this stage of the game normal? I'm on cd7 today. I asked her and she said it's fine for this part of my cycle and she reminded me that she doesn't expect to get oodles from me w/ the high FSH. I understand that, but don't know what normal for this stage is when it comes to follicles. Can someone shed some light on that for me? She said that she doesn't see any reason to hold things up, so it's on to our class next Thurs where we'll talk w/ my nurse about ordering my meds. I guess things are moving right along. It just seems to quick... for some reason I feel like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. Crazy huh?

[tigerest]

Sebski - What you have said makes a lot of sense to me! I would jsut sit down and tell you husband everything you have told us. Hopefully he will be understanding. I am not sure about the follicle thing, I think it is definitely different for everyone.


So....I just had a nice talk with the work nurse. And maybe she could see my exhaustion but she was way understanding. In fact she said I SHOULD get a note from my RE before the next cycle and either say I should only work 32 hrs a week or not at all!!!! And she said all my work can do is decide not to pay me, but they can't do anything else (like lay me off or something) if I have a note! And she said that my boss doesnt need to know, for all he knows I have cancer, and its none of his business. I told her I was worried becuase this has been going on forever, and I have no idea when its going to end, and she told me not to worry about that. As long as I am being seen by a DR then my work cant say anything. But again, they are not required to pay for my time off. So I am going to talk to DH and see what we can afford to do...but not having to worry about making up my time off would be a huge stress relief.

[kischer]

Well, I'm not quite ready to graduate yet, sorry!

I went yesterday to have an ultrasound and bloodwork. The ultrasound showed that there was a sac and a baby, so no twins. A little sad that they are not twins, but I have never made it to an ultrasound that showed anything. We were wicked excited about that! Unfortunately, they did not find a heartbeat. According to LMP I should be like 6w 4d, but I didn't have ER until much later. So I think that that is wrong.

Yes, it could be too early to see the heartbeat, at least that's what we keep thinking. But, my bloodwork showed that my numbers aren't rising they way they should be. I was only up to 10,000 something compared to 2910 last friday. I freaked out when I heard and I'm still very confused, frustrated, and lost. I know that there is still a chance for this baby, but I was just expecting yesterday to be a much better day! Heartbeat, good numbers or just one or the other. Instead I got neither. We are upset, but I have another ultrasound next week and that will be the tell all.

So please, if anyone has any extra thoughts, please please keep us in them. Thank you girls and I will try to do shout outs when I can.

[Bellefior]

Kisch you and your DH are in my thoughts and prayers. Hoping that everything turns out ok.

[gymwidow]

Bellefior, yeah, they did tell us about fluctuations, and we've seen that with all the samples he's given (4 SAs plus 6 IUIs). He's never had a below-normal count before, though. Motility was always in question. Oh, well, at least now we know! Seeing some emotion from your DH is good! I think it would be great for you to join a support group. Although it's awesome to have you guys here to share with, and I also have a couple of friends IRL who have gone through this, I definitely find my weekly support group at my RE's to be helpful.

tigerest, hmmm, I did have a lot of nausea last week, too, now that I think about it. I thought of it as my pre-m/s m/s. ;) I only have 10 more days on the BCP and I am definitely looking forward to ending that! That would be GREAT if you could cut back on your hours a bit. I

Sebski, I understand what you're saying. I hope your DH is understanding, too, and able to work with you so you're both okay with it. And I really hope your FIL will stay out of it, whenever he does find out. I'm glad your saline sono went well. I'm not so sure about follie growth with high FSH. When I was on injectables I had a lot more follies starting by CD7, but I overresponded each time, so I think I'm the oddity there. Definitely bring something to write with/on to your appt! If you can't write it down, ask the doctor or nurse to do it for you.

kischer, hugs and prayers and lots of hope to you.


As for me, I am having wild mood swings. Yesterday I was so emotional and sad and couldn't quite get why. Today, my bank screwed up my home equity loan and I am reacting with extreme anger. Like, I'm so angry I feel like I'm about to explode. Or cry. I know I have a valid right to be upset, but I'm definitely overreacting and I can't make it stop! Argh. I can't wait to get this moving along.

[Tandis]

Kisch - I'm only 6w1d today, so the embryo could have implanted late, making it a little too early to see the h/b. And try to remember that it takes longer for the numbers to rise the higher they get. I believe once it gets above 6000 it's something like four or five days to double. So try to keep in mind that this might all be nothing, and everything is going to be fine. In the meantime, I'm keeping you in my prayers. Good luck with next week's followup.
ETA: I just plugged your numbers into betabase's (http://www.betabase.info/doublingCalc.php) calculator, and you're around 80 hours doubling (with the beta at 10000) - which isn't bad. Personally, that seems right target. Of course, you can put in the accurate numbers and time - I just guessed based upon what you've said.

Tigerest - That's great that you should be able to cut back your hours at work without any problems. Glad something is working out for you. :)

Sebski - Considering that you're on BCP with no stims, I would say your follicles sound fine. Congrats on a good SIS.

[Applebee]

Hi everyone.

Kisch, keeping you in my thoughts and prayers

I've been POAS since Tuesday evening and they've been negative. this was with the $ Tree Brand. I'll use FRER tomorrow and Sunday but Im 99% sure IVF #2 didn't work. I'm glad I POAS this time, I'm totally prepared for my results Monday afternoon.

BBL for shout outs.

[tigerest]

kisch - I am sorry you didn't get quite the good news you were hoping for. I know its impossible, but try not to worry too much yet, and thinking happy baby thoughts. I will also send you tons of healthy baby growing vibes! Good luck at your next appt!

gymwindow - Sorry about the nausea and mood swings. But that is exactly how I was too. Have you started the lurpon? Or are you going to? Hopefully you feel better soon! :)

Tandis - Thanks. After hearing that, my whole mood changed yesterday!

Applebee - Sorry you are still stuck in the 2ww hell! It is the worst! Good luck on Monday....hope you are wrong! :)


Well not big news....but one of my tests came back normal....this is the antithyroid antibody (One of the things that could causes elevated prolactin.) So its seems like my high prolactin is a fluke. I am still waiting on a few more tests to come back. I am sort of hoping that maybe it was just the prolactin keeping me from getting PG....I HOPE!

[Tandis]

Tigerest - Yay for the antibody test coming back negative! :D You know, I did read somewhere, at some point, that prolactin can cause problems with getting pregnant. Isn't it the same hormone that gets activated when women breastfeed? So maybe once you get that fixed, you'll be all good to go! Keeping my fingers crossed for you :D

[gymwidow]

Applebee, hugs, and hope that those $store tests are just junky!

tigerest, I feel much better, thanks. The bank fixed their stupid mistake, and my insurance agent is helping me work on the other problem, so I'm much happier now! I start the Lupron on Tuesday. I'm soooooooo ready! Yay for normal test results! I hope that was it and that there won't be any more obstacles standing in your way!

[IVFIVF]

It's me Jan posting - I messed up my login so I am having to use the alter-ego, please excuse me - -

Kischer I am so thinking of you. I know how stressful this is, but please know that I have had several u/s techs tell me they often don't see a heartbeat until 7 or even 8 weeks. Seeing the yolk sac, fetal pole and fetus is huge. You can use these sites to calcuate your doubling times (ITA with what Tandis said about that) and also to figure out exactly what wee and day you are - you can input your retrieval date.

http://ivfer.com/hcg.htm
http://www.ivf.ca/calcu.htm

Jules you and your DH are very much in my thoughts also.

Hi to everyone else I will be back as myself. :-)

[la_bride_2004]

Kisch I have to agree with Jan on both counts- some people see/hear a heartbeat later than 6 weeks, and the higher the beta the more time it takes to double. I will send every possible positive thought your way!

tigerest yaaay for normal test results!

jules sending hugs- I am still thinking of you.

gymwidow hugs for the SA scores, but if they've never been that low, maybe it was just a bad day? Did the RE recommend SCSA testing?

Belle yaay for DH expressing his emotions! I'm thinking if there's only one (albeit large- is it transverse too?) varicocele that the odds of change after the surgery may or may not make it worth it- sounds like you like this RU much better and he will have a good opinion! Resolve was a lifesaver for me. I think going is an excellent idea (and hey, it actually statistically ups your odds of success!).

Sebski I do totally understand how you feel, and I think you have a right to it. We were in the exact opposite boat- we had severe male factor infertility- but I was very careful who we told because there is no way I would want to take a chance of hurting DH's feelings. His parents know nothing about it, actually, and I respect that he didn't want to tell them, and even let them think there was something "wrong" with me fertility-wise.

[melissafromnc]

kisch What cycle day was your retrieval? IVF pregnancies aren't counted by lmp at all. They always consider retrieval to be CD14 (you know, like assuming everyone ovulates on CD14). How far along are you by doing that? Also, like labride said when your beta gets above 5000 it drastically slows down. In fact above a certain number is starts falling again. And most REs won't be upset if they don't see a hearbeat until 7 weeks or so. Sending lots of +++ thoughts your way.

[kischer]

Thank you everyone for your kind words, thoughts and just plain good luck!

melissa-it's been eons girl! Thank you for stopping in to give me hope! I hope that all is well with you! Yeah, ER was July 6th, so that puts me at 6w3d. Way too early to see a heartbeat last week.

tandis-Yes, I am almost positive that I implanted late. i know they say it's hard to tell, but I think I did.

Jan, la_bride-I believe you both, it was just all so shocking. I also have been checking out those sites since thursday. The canadian one says that I wouldn't see a heartbeat until next thursday anyways. ;)

tiger-I looove baby growing vibes!

applebee-I'm sorry, but you know it could just be too soon. Thanks for thinking of me during this time. I know that you have a lot on your mind!

gymwidow and bellefior-Thanks! I'll take all that I can get!

[Bellefior]

Drive by post with more shout outs later on...

Labride I have no idea if the varicocele is one or more, or if it is transverse, which tells you how much info the first RU gave us--all we got was that the surgery might or might not help, and your wife is not getting younger :mad: (I'll be 38 in Jan, but my hormones and day 3 follicle check all looked good). All I/we know is that it is 4 mm. You better believe we will be going in with a list of questions for this new guy. The records have already been sent over so we are all set for our Weds. appointment.

[Bellefior]

My mock transfer is scheduled for next Monday. Unfortunately, it was the receptionist that called me back and not the nurse. Can anyone tell me what to expect from this and are there any special preparations for it? Is it as painful as an HSG? I do expect a call back from the nurse but figured some of you ladies who have actually been through it can tell me what to expect.
Thanks!

[Tandis]

Mock transfers aren't bad - in fact, I found the IUIs to be more painful! Just a tiny little bit of cramping during it, and that was it.

My RE did a dildo cam first, to check out how my uterus was shaped, and then inserted the speculum. After that he inserted the thin little catheter, and measured the depth of my uterus - and that was it!

Start to finish was probably about five minutes.

It's really nothing to worry about. :)

[Bellefior]

ahh...the dildo cam again...when I was mentioning it to DH yesterday he laughed and called it the porno cam and I corrected him and told him it was not called the porno cam it was called the dildo cam and if he was going to refer to it to at least get the name of it right! You figure by now with all the ultrasounds, they would know what my uterus looks like! It can't be anywhere near as bad as the HSG...at least this time they are not shooting dye up there!

[Applebee]

Official results...Negative :(

Testing ahead of time definitely helped me handle getting the results at work. I almost started crying while on hold for the scheduler to book my follow-up, but she picked up just in time.

I go in on 8/30 in the afternoon. I was a little annoyed that it's so far out, but what can you do.

[Bellefior]

Applebee sending lots of hugs your way...

[gymwidow]

Applebee, sending lots of hugs....... I'm so so sorry.

[julesp313]

Applebee - I am so, so sorry. That just out and out sucks. Sending big hugs your way...
Bellefior - my mock transfer caused a bit more cramping than my HSG, but my HSG was painless (literally). My RE nicked my uterine lining with the catheter so I bled a bit but it wasn't painful - just AF-type cramping. Take two Tylenol before if you cramp during this sort of thing.

Me - waiting, waiting, waiting. Will be back later.

[tigerest]

applebee - I am so sorry to hear that it didn't work. :(

[la_bride_2004]

(((applebee))) I'm sorry for the negative.


Belle they did my mock transfer when I was "under" for ER. Might be an option to ask about! Also sending good luck vibes for your upcoming RU appointment.

[julesp313]

I have a tiny ray of hope, just peeking through the very dark clouds that have been hanging over DH and I since a week ago Saturday. I did the math (I'm an accountant, what can I say?) and I guesstimated today's beta would need to be over 220 in order to be even a possibility, based on the 60% doubling rate that my RE said he likes to see. Today's beta - 275. That's good. :) Still not sure what's going on - now the dr's are even more confused! Going back Wednesday for another draw and an ultrasound to rule out ectopic - I think it's unlikely as the embryo would have had to swim upstream against the tide, so to speak, but better to rule it out than to wonder. I'm taking DH in case there actually is something lurking in my uterus and we get to see it on the screen. I'm smiling again for the first time in a while where TTC is concerned. :)

[gymwidow]

la bride, it's possible. Usually his count is fine. I don't know what SCSA is? I'll have to go google it. They're doing cultures this time to check for infections since his last sample showed too many white blood cells. He sees the urologist this Thursday, so hopefully we'll have some answers then.

kischer, any new news? When is your next u/s?

Bellefior, good luck with your mock transfer!

Applebee, I've been thinking about you and hope that you're doing okay.

jules, wow, that's great! (said very cautiously) I hope to hear more good news from you tomorrow!

************************************************** ***************************

7 more BCP and counting. :p This morning I went in for b/w and should get the go ahead to start my Lupron shots tonight. I'm a little nervous just b/c it's the first time I've had to draw the meds myself; all my shots till now have been prefilled syringes. I'll probably have a nurse verbally walk me through it again, just to be sure, but I think I remember what they showed me and I'm sure I'll be okay. I'm just so happy we're finally starting!!!! :)

I've also been a little scared again lately, about what if this doesn't work. I was so positive all last week and still am mostly, but the old fears started surfacing again last night. I'm pushing them away and hope they stay gone!

[Tandis]

Jules - Ooh! Very cautiously excited for you :) Hope your u/s tomorrow will be fantastic!

Applebee - {{{HUGS}}} I'm so sorry - I hope your RE has some answers for you. :(

Gymwidow - Congrats on the starting the Lupron! You'll be a pro in no time with giving yourself those shots ;)

[Bellefior]

Warning Long Post Ahead...

Well today was our appointment for the second opinion with a different reproductive urologist. What a difference between him and the one we saw who is affiliated with my IVF practice-night and day!

We definitely liked his personality and "bedside manner" so much better than the last one. First thing he said to us was "I've read your records over, but why don't you tell me why you are here and how I can help you." We liked the "tell me how I can help you part"--this guy definitely has compassion when it comes to dealing with IF patients. The last guy definitely had a hard edge to him which is part of the reason why DH did not like him. We explained our story, what we had been told, and when we told him that the doctors we had seen thought the varicocele was not the issue when it came to the low counts, he seemed almost outraged that someone would say that to us and said "which doctor said that to you?" You could almost see him visibly get pi$$ed when we told him that.

He examined DH while I left the room, then he sat us down to talk to us. Basically, DH's varicocele is not "small"(which is what DH and I thought)--in fact, it can be felt on examination alone which is a very good indication that it most definitely is not on the small end of things. He then told us that varicocele repair surgery brings up sperm counts across the board about 50% of the time. The other 50% it does not. However, he said that we had two "clues" as to why DH's counts may be so low. First was the varicocele. The second was the fact that DH's testosterone is on the low end. Testosterone affects sperm production and the varicocele could be impacting the testosterone levels thereby leading to the lower counts. Contrast this with what the other RU told us...that the lower testosterone had nothing to do with the lower counts.

Basically, he wants to repeat all the tests on DH. Had repeat bloodwork done. DH has to go back for another SA and a urinalysis immediately following the SA. This doctor told us that sometimes when there is a lower volume (as is the case with DH), it could be because instead of all the of semen coming out, it backs up back into the bladder. That may not be the case, but they want to rule that out. The other RU never even suggested this as a possibility (even though we had read about it) and never did a urinalysis to rule this out. DH also has to go back for another ultrasound. The ultrasound techs there only work with the urology practice, have been trained by the doctors in the practice, and know what to look for (as opposed to an ultrasonographer that does a little bit of everything). The doctor wants to also make sure there isn't a smaller varicocele on the right side.

All of this will be completed the week before I see the RE again but we are still going ahead to complete our IF workup anyway. But at least now we have a glimmer of hope. This doctor didn't fluff off the possibility that the size of the varicocele may be the root of the problem. DH was also quite upset that the other urologist didn't even suggest the urinalysis to rule out another possible problem (as remote as it may be), made it seem like the varicocele was on the small end, and said there was no connection between the low testosterone and low counts. Needless to say, after today, I wasn't too happy with him either. DH also is starting to question what the RE is telling us about the varicocele, but as this doctor correctly pointed out, RE's really tend to focus more on female issues and IVF, and very often, they just bypass the whole male-factor issue in favor of IVF. Male stuff really isn't their thing, which is why they have you see a reproductive urologist if there is a male issue.

We feel like we are in good hands and the doctor is really taking the time to listen to us and deal with the issue rather than bypassing it. He also didn't make me feel like I had one foot in the grave and should be applying for social security because I will be 38 in January (in fact he said that I am not at the age where the alarm bells start sounding, and we know from our visit with the RE that all my hormone levels and follicle scans look good). We didn't know this at the time, but he runs a male infertility program at one one the hospitals here (only one in the area), so we feel confident he knows his stuff. His name actually came up repeatedly as the person to see in our area for this. We now actually feel like someone is listening to us and actually trying to fix the problem with DH. (If anyone needs the name of a good RU in the area, let me know!)

*****************

Jules, Kisch, Applebee, Tandis and anyone else I might have missed, thinking of you all.

*****************
ETA: Remember I posted aboout a co-worker who told me about 1 month ago that she was pregnant, was sensitive to the fact that we are having TTC issues, and actually called me into her office to tell me personally because she knows what I am going through? I so much appreciated her being sensitive to my issue and telling me in person rather than letting me hear it through the office grapevine, and I wasn't upset about hearing about it because of the way she told me. I didn't say anything to anyone else in the office. Well apparently the news has finally hit the office grapevine. A co-worker came up to me and said, have you heard the news about so and so? I said yes, I know she's pregnant, she told me personally about a month ago and I appreciated the way she told me personally and was sensitive to my issues that it didn't bother me like pregnancy announcements usually do. So of course co-worker said, "well, you can't be upset everytime you hear someone else's happy announcement :eek: ." You know what I wanted to say to that co-worker??? F--- You (where's the middle finger smilie when I need it???). You have two kids, have no clue what IF is like or the pain that people go through when they are having problems TTC, so don't tell me how I should or should not feel. This was the same co-worker (that I posted about last week) that told me that my husband and I really needed to make a decision about what we wanted to do after we got this second opinion. I have a feeling that she told me the news about my co-worker to see my flip out, and I am so proud of the fact that I didn't. You know the saying, with friends like that, who needs enemies???

[tigerest]

Drive by post....

I finally got all my testing results back....and I have elevated Natural Killer Cell Activity. Which means I now have to do Ivig(intraveinous imunoglobulin). :( Sucks. It sucks because just one time costs $3500, and I would have to do it once before transfer, and once if I got PG. I also have to be hooked up to an IV for 6-8 hours.

Everything else (except for my prolactin level which I am being treated for) came back normal.

The NKA's scare me because they are directly realted to endo. Right after my surgery my NK's were normal, so I dont know if this means my endo is back already....just after 5 months. :(

I wish someone could tell me that I WILL get PG and this WILL all be worth it in the end.

[la_bride_2004]

bellefior

DH also is starting to question what the RE is telling us about the varicocele, but as this doctor correctly pointed out, RE's really tend to focus more on female issues and IVF, and very often, they just bypass the whole male-factor issue in favor of IVF. Male stuff really isn't their thing, which is why they have you see a reproductive urologist if there is a male issue.


Oh wow, this is SUCH a true statement, and one that cost us nearly $20k to learn!

I am so happy the second opinion went so well!

Re the coworker- that is a totally crappy comment, and I understand why you were hurt.

I will say as a "longtimer" the less people you tell, the less crap you have to deal with. It's a very sad but very true fact- most people don't get infertility and the best you can do is protect yourself. This is another lesson I learned the hard way.

[la_bride_2004]

(((tigerest))) dang, believe me, I WISH I could tell you with certainty it would all work out! Just remember, if you want to be a parent, you will be.

If it helps, I do know someone with endo and elevated NKA cells, underwent IViG, and eventually had a successful cycle.

[julesp313]

I swear I'm not trying to be a drama queen, but I don't know how much more of this I can take...

This is now like an emotional roller coaster with malfunctioning safety harnesses! DH and I went to the dr's this morning, I had blood drawn and they did an u/s to see if they could see the sac in the uterus. Based on my levels, it would be smaller than a pea, so very hard to find - the RE said like looking for a needle in a haystack. The good news is that they didn't see a sac in either of my tubes, which would have confirmed an ectopic. The bad news is we didn't see it in the uterus either. The dr said that could still indicate an ectopic as they do either a positive confirmation (seeing it in the tubes) or a negative one (not seeing it in the uterus). So the dr wanted to review my blood results but said he would anticipate my beta leveling off and I would have to go in on Friday to have a shot of methotrexate to induce miscarriage. If there is any indication of an ectopic, they want to treat it as early as possible because there is a danger of the tube rupturing. Also, if you leave it too long, they can no longer use a shot but instead have to do surgery which is obviously less preferable. So - that was upsetting news but DH and I thought at least the end was here.

Fast forward to 4pm when the dr calls me - my levels have gone up at a now-normal rate of rise (from 275 to 494 in 48 hours), suggesting this is NOT an ectopic, as with that, the rate of rise doesn't increase. So, Friday will be another blood draw to determine if the rise is continuing normally. If that is the case, the assumption is going to be that the embryo implanted far later than expected and therefore is not yet big enough to be seen on ultrasound. Then we keep testing my levels until they are high enough to do another u/s and then go from there. So - we continue to wait.

Bellefior - man oh man, I am glad you got that second opinion! I sure hope the new RU can help you guys out and improve your situation.
Tigerest - wow, that is expensive! But worth it if it works. I'm sure your RE is keeping a close eye on you for endo, right? I am SO with you on wishing we could know for SURE that this is worth it... right now, I can't honestly say if it is or not.

Hugs all round, I think! I'll hug myself if nobody else can reach... :)

[kischer]

Applebee-I'm sorry. How are you doing?

jules-OMG, I know all too well. The rollercaster that you are on is way too familiar. I hope that Friday is a GREAT day for you!

Bellefior-How did the mock go? I thought that it was much much easier than the HSG. I hope that your experience is just as easy. I think the only problem that I had was that they ask you to go in with a full bladder and put a padded mat under you. But I didn't realize that it would be so messy and I had to ask if I was peeing myself. :D We all laughed our arse off! Sounds like the second opinion went well, glad to hear that. Oh, and I am so with la_bride, the less people you tell the better. It sounds selfish but think of yourself first. People that have no idea really do have no idea. I mean they think that if they've read an article or saw a tv show they know all about IF. Save yourself! ;)

tiger-6-8 hours huh?! I know that this is a steep price to pay, I know that this is a lot to take in, but I also know that you will do anything to have a child in your arms. I truly hope that the endo is not back. I know that one day you will have your dream and I hope that it comes soon.

waving hello to anyone I missed and hugs to those that are having a difficult time!

$$$$$$$$$

Well, tomorrow is my big day. If we don't see a heartbeat then...well, you know. I was nervous. Now, I am just scared out of my mind. I swear it just something else each week. I just wish we could get past this with some fantabulous news! I just want to say that, I plan on coming back here tomorrow with news of me graduating, not to leave you all, but to have good news on the front page under my name!!

[Bellefior]

I will say as a "longtimer" the less people you tell, the less crap you have to deal with. It's a very sad but very true fact- most people don't get infertility and the best you can do is protect yourself. This is another lesson I learned the hard way.

I know, I probably shouldn't have been so open with my co-workers, but the problem is that I work in a very small office (less than 20 people) with a very active grapevine (as evidenced by the fact that some people who I hadn't said anything to about why I was missing work somehow knew exactly what was going on). Once I started missing so much work, they thought I was either pregnant or having issues TTC, then when I wasn't showing up visibly pregnant or announcing it, they figured it out on their own. Unfortunately, secrets don't stay secrets long in my office. In a way, I am kind of glad that they know because it kind of keeps people off my back and keeps me out of the petty office BS, but on the other hand, I still have to deal with the occassional office idiot. My boss is quite understanding and has basically said take all the time off I need and not to worry about it.

Kisch & Jules, wishing you both well! PS. Mock transfer is next Monday, I'm going to go ahead with it anyway even though we are now dealing with a second urologist and DH is having additional testing done. We want our IVF workup to essentially be complete so we will be ready to go if need be.

[julesp313]

Kischer - hoping and praying you get excellent news at your U/S today. I'll be thinking of you - nobody needs to be dealing with the emotional stresses of IF and pregnancy like we all are - *especially* not those of us who have gone through all this to GET pregnant!

Bellefior - I told people in my office who were RUDE enough to ask what was going on that I was having surgery to remove ovarian cysts. That shut them up, particularly the men! :)

I'm up far too early because Gracie the cat had a howling session outside our bedroom door at 5:30am. She got a stern look from me when I got up, rolled over on her back, and farted at me. What a start to the day... ;)

[gymwidow]

Tandis, thanks. It wasn't the shot itself I was nervous about, it was drawing the meds into the syringe. Is that silly or what! :rolleyes: But it was really easy and all is going well.

Bellefior, I work in a small office, too, and it's so hard not to let word get around. I had told one secretary here that I'm close with and my receptionist figured out what was going on when all my meds were delivered here in a big bag marked "Pharmaceuticals - REFRIGERATE", and then I told my boss, but other than that I've tried to keep it quiet. Hard when there are only 5 other people in the office!

tigerest, I'm sorry it wasn't better news, but glad that you got some kind of answers. It's kind of a double-edged sword, isn't it? We want to know what's going on and are relieved when we know, but when it's something like this, it's just one more thing to have to treat and deal with. Still, it's one step closer to reaching that goal!

jules, holy crap (can I say that on here?)! I am so sorry this is neverending. I hope it does end soon, with some good news!

kischer, I'm thinking about you today! I hope it's a GREAT appointment!


My 2nd Lupron shot was much easier last night. The first one pinched on Tuesday, but I hesitated with the needle and that always causes a little pain. I was a lot firmer with it last night and barely even felt the prick when it went in. Yay! My mood swings are continuing and I cannot wait to get off these pills. I hope that helps settle me down. Only 5 more to go.

DH saw the RU this morning and got pretty good news. His count is actually in the close-to-normal range, and with his history of pretty normal counts, this one could just have been an anomaly. The doc isn't quite sure the "white blood cells" the tech saw are actually that and he wants DH to do yet another (his 5th) SA. So he's waiting to do that now. There is nothing wrong with his prostate, and we're basically good to go!

[kischer]

I thought that you all should know we did not see a heartbeat. Now, I just wait, again. For the 4th time. I'm beyond devastated, actually, that's not even the feeling. I can't describe the feeling. I also don't know that I can do this again.

[Bellefior]

Kisch I am so sorry. Sending lots of hugs your way. Words just seem so inadequate right now, please know that we are here for you, whatever you might need.

[tigerest]

Kisch - OMG! I am so sorry. Just seems so unfair! {{{HUGS}}} You and your husband will be in my thoughts and prayers today. :(

[tigerest]

jules - I am also very sorry you are getting put through this rollercoaster. Sounds like pure torture! Thinking good thoughts for you!!! Hoping everything will be normal here on out.

[tigerest]

Bellefior - Wow what a difference between Dr's huh? I am so glad you got that second opinion! Glad he is looking into this further and running more test! :)

labride - Thank you! It does help!:) Do you know if it worked her first try?

jules - Is your cat related to mine?

gymwidow - Glad the shots are going better. Sorry about the mood swings...they are the worst! You start to wonder if you will ever be normal again! Glad things are looking good for DH! :)

[gymwidow]

kischer, oh, no. I am so very sorry. I'll be thinking of you today and sending you as many hugs as I can......

tigerest, normal, what's that? ;) I can barely even remember a time when every day wasn't consumed by something TTC-related! Thanks, DH's news was very welcome. I think men have such a harder time accepting problems with themselves in general, and I know it's been rough on my DH.

[Bellefior]

normal, what's that? ;)

I have resigned myself to the fact that I no longer know what is considered normal in my life once I hopped on the TTC roller-coaster. As someone once said to me, maybe this is the "new normal" and I just have to get used to it.

[julesp313]

Kischer - I am so, so sorry. I know words don't help (nothing helps) but I am thinking of you.

[julesp313]

Gym - glad to hear your shot was better this time. I found hard and fast worked best for me, in the thigh, and DH said the IM shots he literally threw like a dart (explains how my ass got so sore!).
Tigerest - I don't even know what news we need now in order to feel happy! Every visit and phone call brings changes in what's going on so I've stopped thinking it might be ok. Probably won't feel it's OK til the kid leaves home for college! And not even then! Thank you for the thoughts, though - they do help.

[Lola9404]

Kischer - I am so sorry. I read your post and it hit me like a punch in the stomach because we got that same news exactly one month ago today.

I know just how hard it is to come home from that ultrasound. If there is anything you need, just PM me.

take care of yourself,
xo
Lola

Hi to everyone, and congrats on all of the BFPs...

My news is that there is no real news, still waiting for my beta to drop to zero after my m/c. :(

[melissafromnc]

kischer I'm so very, very sorry. Thinking of you and your dh. I also know just how incredibly suck it is to get that kind of news. How it can be both devastating and numbing. Truly so sorry.

[julesp313]

Here's irony - today would have been my due date from my first pregnancy, which ended in miscarriage at 5w5d. Instead of waiting to deliver a baby, I was at the RE's office getting a shot of methotrexate to end my second pregnancy at 5w6d. At least this time we knew - it was ectopic, we saw it today. This was our only option. I'll be monitored until my levels are zero and then we sit down with the RE and discuss the outcome and what we do next. We won't do IVF again, but we won't prevent either. The nurse said I should start bleeding within 4 days but I already am. My lining was much thinner today than two days ago so it had already started breaking down.

I'm sad, of course, but knowing that this was heading this way, I'm not totally devastated - I'd already grieved this pregnancy two weeks ago when I woke up bleeding. I am glad that this is over - the waiting was agony. Now I can heal, physically, and get myself into a better place mentally and move on with life. We're going to make plans for travel and getting fit and working on the house. If God decides to throw a baby in there, so be it, but we aren't revolving our lives around that goal any longer. Two years, two pregnancies and two miscarriages is enough.

I'm going to excuse myself from this thread and stay off the FP boards for a while. I want to thank everyone here for being so supportive and informative during my short stay. While I won't be posting any longer, I will come back and lurk once I'm feeling a bit more up to it, and I will certainly be hoping and praying that everyone gets the results they want and so very much deserve.

Everyone take very good care of yourselves!

[tigerest]

jules - I am so very sorry! :( I will be thinking about you and your DH, and hope you enjoy some travelling and are able to keep your mind of this stuff for a while. Take care of yourself. {{HUGS}}

[Bellefior]

Jules--I am sorry. Please take care of yourself. I will be praying for you and your DH and keeping you both in my thoughts.

[gymwidow]

jules, many hugs to you. I'll be thinking of you and your DH.

[amychris03]

kischer ((hugs)). I'm so sorry.

Jules ((hugs)). I'm very sorry about your ectopic. I had an
ectopic pregnancy and the methotrexate shot so PLEASE PM me if
you have any questions about anything, ok? Take care.:(

[melissafromnc]

jules I am so very very sorry. I've had two ectopics. The last one required 2 shots of meth and it still ruptured so I'm now very concerned about others with ectopics. I'm also here if you have any questions. The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust is a great resource. I think it's ectopicpregnancy.org. It sounds like you're in great hands medically but if you feel pain, and it's not 4 days after the shot, call your docs right away or go to the ER. Even if it's just you feel very constipated. So very sorry for your loss.

[Suzlywoozly]

Jules- I am so sorry that this is happening to you. Take care of yourself. You'll be in my thoughts :(

Kisch- {{Big hugs}} I am so sorry. This just isn't fair!

[Suzlywoozly]

Applebee- I'm sorry about the BFN.

Gymwidow- How are the lupron injections going now? If ya thionk the mood sings are bad while on the pill, just wait until you start the stims;)

Hi to everyone else! I am trying to keep up, but work has been kicking my butt the past few weeks... not a very good thing to happen in the middle of a FET cycle. I started the injectable estrogen last Saturday. It isn't as bad as I thought... definitely not as bad as the PIO. ET should be 2 weeks from today.

For those of you who have done the injectable estrogen... how often did you do the injection?

[Asha]

i haven't had a chance to read through this whole thread, but my re highly suggested ivf for us bc of possible "mechanical problems" with my fallopian tubes. he gave us a 65% chance of success. is this the usual rate of success or do they adjust it according to the history of the couple? also, how did you rationalize spending so much money on ivf when it is not a certainty you will end up with a baby at the end?

tia for your advice!

[Suzlywoozly]

also, how did you rationalize spending so much money on ivf when it is not a certainty you will end up with a baby at the end?

I guess it really depends on how badly you want a baby. I think most of the girls here can agree with me that the desire and want to have a child is so strong that we would move mountains to make it happen. You can't focus on the money and the unknown of whether it is going to work.

For the most part, I think the success rates are pretty standard. Obviously if you have a more complicated diagnosis, the are going to tell you that your chances of success are going to be lower.

[la_bride_2004]

(((kisch)))) and ((((jules))))

[la_bride_2004]

Asha

i haven't had a chance to read through this whole thread, but my re highly suggested ivf for us bc of possible "mechanical problems" with my fallopian tubes. he gave us a 65% chance of success. is this the usual rate of success or do they adjust it according to the history of the couple? also, how did you rationalize spending so much money on ivf when it is not a certainty you will end up with a baby at the end?

1. Your chances of success do depend on individual factors, such as maternal age, the cause of infertility, etc. If you look at the CDC stats report, you can get a breakdown of success rates by age in the US. 65% sounds very high to me, but it perhaps you are very young.

2. How we rationalized spending money on IVF when there are no guarantees you will end up with a baby?

Well, this is a very personal question and does depend on your individual situation (both financial and your odds of success with IVF).

Some people don't just want a "baby"; the experience of pregnancy, childbirth and a genetic connection to the child have a very high value, so they will pursue treatment for those reasons, and the financial risk is something they weigh against these desires and dreams.

[gator97]

I have missed so much! Hello again to all.

I'm so sorry to Kischer and Jules. Thinking of you both during this hard time.

Applebee- sorry about the BFN.

I still have lots of catching up to do.

As for Asha's question re: justifying the money. Let me preface this by stating that I'm coming from the perspective of someone who has insurance and thus far has not had to pay a ghastly amount out of pocket. We have been very blessed. However, we are getting to the point where insurance will run out soon as we have a lifetime max. So, we are starting to plan ahead. The mantra my DH keeps coming back with is, "would you rather have stuff or children." So, we might have to sacrifice some of the "stuff" for a baby.


eta: I, by no means, was trying to brag that we have insurance. As I reread this post, I just wanted to be sure to include that I just felt the need to justify where we are coming from at this point in time when answering any concerns about money. We aren't "feeling" the impact yet so I'm coming from a slightly different place.

[gymwidow]

Suzly, the shots are going pretty well. I hope the stims don't affect me like that! I didn't have any side effects when I was on them before, but this will be the highest dose I've ever taken, so I guess anything is possible! I'm glad your estrogen shots aren't that bad. Are you getting excited about the ET?

Asha, I think the success rates do depend on the factors involved. My RE told me that our chances are about 60-70%. My clinic's success rates overall are pretty good - about 61% for women in my age group. I didn't really look at paying for IVF as rationalizing. It was just (unfortunately) something we had to do. We wouldn't hesitate to spend it on any other necessary medical procedure, and while we weren't thrilled with having to spend so much money to do something that most people get for "free", we didn't hesitate to do it because we both want children so much.


Nothing new here. Today I had the most massive splitting headache. Worse than any migraine I've ever had. It came on fast and really put me out of commission for a while. Some extra strength tylenol and a can of caffeinated soda lessened the pain a bit, and it finally went away. I'm wondering if it could have been a s/e of the Lupron? I've been on it for 5 days now. I hope not, because I hope not to have another one like that again!

Only two more BCP to go. Yay!

I hope everyone has a good week. Kisch and Jules, I hope you're both doing okay.

[Suzlywoozly]

Gymwidow- Sorry about the headaches! Unfortunately, Lupron gave me some seriously bad headaches... That may have been the cause of yours.

I am trying to be excited about the FET, but am totally scared about having another chemical pregnancy or a BFN. I think the fear gets worse with every cycle. The estrogen is making me a mad woman! Poor DH... I have bit his head off more times than I can count.

[Cath]

Jules and Kischer - I'm so, so sorry.

[gator97]

Gymwidow- hope your symptoms calm down a bit

Suzly- I think it's understandable not to get too excited. It's down the dreaded road again where disappointment could be waiting. It is self-preservation at this point and I think that is both healthy and okay.

Question- has anyone who does not have PCOS been prescribed Metformin as part of their protocol?

[Bellefior]

This is going to be a rather quick post. I've been in training at work all day, and have had no chance to catch up on e-mails or anything else.

Mock-transfer was today. Quick and pretty painless, except when the cathether was going in. Nothing like the HSG and it took all of 5 minutes. They did make me give a urine sample to make sure I wasn't pregnant...no surprise that I wasn't...DH said it was probably protocol to give one anyway. I did get to meet one of the other doctors in the practice and liked him a lot...he is actually the director of the program. I actually told DH when we left and had a cup of tea in the hospital cafe that I am actually at the point where I feel I can do this...in fact what I said was, I am so ready to do this...I'm not afraid anymore.

On the issue of spending $$$ for IVF Unfortunately, even though I am in a mandatory coverage state, my employer does not cover it because I work for the Feds. I think every person needs to decide what their comfort level is in terms of how much to spend on IVF because everyone's financial situation is different. As I summed it up for DH, all the money in the bank is not going to make me/us happy if we don't have kids to spend it on. We haven't decided where/what our breaking point is yet but do know that we are willing to try at least two cycles paying out of pocket before we re-evaluate our options (hopefully that will not be necessary).

**************

Not much else to report. I probably had the most laid back weekend I have had in a long time. Went to see Jimmy Buffett with our friends on Saturday and we had our usual monster tailgate...DH really outdid himself--this year...he went to the docks near his parents' summer home (which was our crash pad for the weekend) and bought lobsters and steamers right off the boats, put the large pot and the boiler, portable grill, and portable burner in the back of FIL pickup truck, along with chairs, a table, and a cooler full of beers, sodas, and pre-mixed margaritas. It was just so good to sit down and chill with friends before the show. So we all had barbecue and a seafood dinner...surf and turf. Best part--DH gave our next door tailgaiting neighbors a stick of butter, and they returned the favor by giving us passes to the backstage pre-show party! How awesome was that? Jimmy wasn't there, but his band was, and it was all the free margaritas, Coronas, and sodas you could drink before the show, along with plenty of hor doeuvres. Real VIP treatment! It was just so good to put the whole TTC issue on the shelf for at least the weekend and just focus on having a good time with our friends...DH and I decided we really have to try to do that more often!

[Applebee]

Hello ladies!

I had a very relaxing weekend. This was thanks to the Friday that I had. DH and I were off. I accompanied him to Covington, VA. We left at 4am - arriving at 9am (stopping once for breakfast). DH had an appt to have his truck put on the Dynojet Machine. He has a SuperChip in it and changed some things in his computer, ie, going from 87 octane to 93 octane for gas. Anyway, he basically wanted to make sure everything was in sync and running correctly. We figured we'd be on our way home by 1pm and DH would make the Ravens preseason game...HA...we ended up leaving at 10:30pm and getting home at 2:30am. Two hours shy of being up 24 hours.

I'm very eager for my follow-up in two weeks. I've been doing some research on immunology and I have to say, yahoo's boards are phenomenal. Of course, all that stuff is over my head, but I'm hoping to learn as much as I can before my mtg w/the doc. I want to be as informed as possible to make sure he agrees to do immune testing on me. I called Dr. Alan Beer's offices in CA. They told me they've worked closely w/Shady Grove and have several patients long distance. The main thing is getting the doc and insurance companies to sign off on it. We'll see.

Belle - A friend of mine w/the Buffet concert. She loved it. Glad to hear you and DH had a good time. Something like that is great every once in while.

[Tandis]

Oh Jules, that's not fair. I am so sorry it ended like this. Please take care of yourself, and I hope you're able to find some peace. {{{HUGS}}} You and your DH are in my thoughts and prayers.

Oh no, Kisch. I am so very sorry. {{{HUGS}}} You and your DH are in my thoughts and prayers.

[Tandis]

Applebee - I'm so sorry to hear about your BFN. Glad your Friday was relaxing. My DH had a little handheld computer "thingamajig" (very technical term ;)) that does that on his truck. Changes the octane, messes with the computer - I think he can change the tire size, set it up for towing, along with some other stuff. Do you want me to find out what it is? Might save you another trip like last weekend.

Bellefior - Glad the mock transfer went well, and that you really feel ready for the IVF. It really makes all the difference in the world.

Suzly - At this point, with everything you've been through, I think it's understandable that you're a little gun-shy, so to speak (IVF-shy?).

Gymwidow - I've heard that one of the s/e's of Lupron is the headaches. Hopefully, that's the only one you'll get.

Waving Hi to everyone I've missed!

*******************

Last week I started getting a fever on Tuesday night, that ended up reaching 100.7 by early Wednesday morning. Called my RE, they said to take it easy and take some Tylenol and call them if it reached above 101. By that evening, it was 101.4 - so I paged my RE. He said to come in the next morning for some bloodwork and a quick checkup to make sure everything was okay. After I got off the phone, my temp spiked to 102.3, but luckily, it didn't stay there long.

The next morning, I was still running a 100 degree fever, so my Mom takes me to the doctor, since DH couldn't get off work. I get on the table - Mom's right next to me - my RE sticks in the dildocam, and boom - two sacs, two babies, two heartbeats - we're having twins! :D The RE said not to tell everyone right away because there is still a chance for Vanishing Twin, but both babies are about the same size (one is 8mm and the other is 9.4mm), so he felt pretty confident that both would make it.

To finish my story, I ended up going to my regular Dr., and no one knows what was wrong with me. Some sort of infection, no idea where it came from, but it's not in my ovary, tube, uterus or cervix, so the babies are fine. Ended up getting a heat rash, and swelled up with fluids to the point where I gained five pounds and could barely use my hands. But I'm now on antibiotics, and things have more or less gone back to normal.

A very scary few days, with the temp that kept hovering in the 101s and spiking into 102s, but everything appears to be fine. I'm going back on Thursday for another u/s since DH couldn't be with me for the first one, so he can see the babies. The best part (besides getting to see them again)? My RE is doing it for free. :D

[Bellefior]

Tandis how scary! Glad everything worked out and hurray for seeing twins! (What we all suspected right?). Question, are you still doing the progesterone shots or have you been able to stop them.? How long did you have to do them for?

[Applebee]

Jules & Kisch, I'm so sorry {{{HUGS}}}

Tandis - it's probably the same thing my DH has. It's not that we HAVE to go down there, just that DH trusts this shop the most. They are LOVED by so many F150/Ford truck owners. Excellent news on the twinkies!!!

[Suzlywoozly]

Tandis- How scary! I hope you are feeling better. Congratulations on TWINS!!!

[Tandis]

Suzly - Thanks, I am feeling better. :)

Applebee - Thanks! It probably is the same thing. Totally understand about having to drive many miles away for something that you can do closer to home. DH is a car guy, and he drag races. We have drag racing tracks around here, but he prefers to drive the two hours that it takes to get to the one he likes. :rolleyes:

Belle - It's funny, there's a huge difference between suspecting it, and knowing it for certain. I've been telling DH since before the ET that we were having twins, but after the Dr. confirmed it? Then I started freaking out. :rolleyes: I never had to do PIO shots. My RE does HCG booster shots for luteal support. 2500 units every three days until roughly 10dpo. That's why I couldn't POAS early, and my beta wasn't until 18dpo.

****************

Real quick because DH is waiting for me. Got the blood tests back and it turns out I had a mild strep infection - not strep throat, but a variety that tries to get into your blood stream. Thankfully we caught it early, so the babies are A-OK. I'll be on antibiotics for two weeks.

[tigerest]

I'm at work...and I am way behind, so please forgive me if I miss anyone.

Lola - Nice to see you. Sorry you are still waiting.

Suzly - Hi! How are you doing? When is your ET?

gator - I have never heard about metformin being used without PCOS, I'd be interested in hearing why?

Bellefior - I am glad you are feeling better about IVF. I like what your DH said..."all the money in the bank is not going to make me/us happy if we don't have kids to spend it on". I will have to keep that in mind the next time I am stressing about money or my job.

applebee - I have never managed to look around the yahoo forums, but I go to ivfconnections. What kind of immune testing are you thinking of doing? I just did a bunch, and everything came back normal except my NKA's.

Tandis - OMG x's 2!!! That is awesome about the twins and that they seem to be ok, despite your illness! How does one catch strep virus? Glad you are being treated for it now!!! Very Scary! Take care and rest up!


I have had a bit of a rough week or so. I am scared to do the IVIg because of the cost and health risks, and its like a slap in the face knowing that I pretty much have to change something in my blood to get PG or my body will just keep killing embryos. :( But alas, I think I am going to do it. I am giving it my all this next cycle...cutting down my hours at work, taking the entire week from ER through ET off of work, and doing IVIg.

Of course, I was supposed to have AF a week ago and start BCP's, but I barely ovulated so I will be waiting another 2 weeks for AF. I am still waiting to hear from my DR whether that is going to be ok. I have my appt with the coordinator tomorrow to go over my meds and calendar. I am supposed to start lupron 9/2. I am hoping everything will be ok, and all it will mean is 2 weeks less of BCP's! Now that would be nice. ;)

[klsoo]

tigerest

i used to frequent the ivf board at wc and now i am a lurker over here. i'm so sorry about your elevated nks. i too had high levels and underwent several ivig treatments and had a positive outcome. pm me if you have any questions about the process/side effects/etc.

good luck to you and everyone else!

[tigerest]

klsoo - Thank you for posting! I will definitely PM you, the more info the better! :) Thanks.

[Bellefior]

Dealing with insurance issues really, really sucks.

I just looked into if DH lands a job in a neighboring state (he is interviewing Friday) what exactly does their state mandate for IF benefits cover. I was told straight out of the mouth of the director of the state board of insurance that beginning next January 1 there, even though there is a state mandate for IF benefits, the major insurance carriers in the state now have the option not to cover it if it is due to a male issue. Which is our issue. Which means we are screwed, yet again, if he does land a job there and they decide not to cover it after January 1.

Maybe I (and everyone else whose insurance does not cover this) should just start buying lottery tickets? Anyone want to start a pool that we can all share in?

[tigerest]

bellefior - That is ridiculous! I am sorry! So does that mean they wouldn't even cover a surgery?

I am currently trying to get my insurance to pay for my IVIg, because I just found out with the going rate right now, it may cost me $4500 per infusion!!! :eek:

[Bellefior]

Tiger I didn't even get into the what is and isn't covered issue. At least we know my insurance covers the workup and surgery if need be, but no ART procedures. I've resigned myself to the fact that we will be paying out of pocket for whatever needs to be done. We're still hopeful that after DH completes all his testing with the new RU, the RU might have a solution other than moving straight to IVF. But we are not counting on it either.

[gator97]

Tigerest- $4500 per infusion. Ack!

Bellefior- sorry that you keep getting screwed up with insurance. Why it isn't mandated is beyond me. all the loopholes must be annoying.

Got more info today and the doctor suspects high peripheral insulin levels. haven't even looked it up yet to see what that means. Off to do that!

[tigerest]

I had a period with my BFN for my FET cycle, and haven't had a period since. It could be that I ovulated late. So the nurse coordinator told me if I don’t start my period by the 27th just to start taking the pills anyway and proceed with my calendar. Has anyone ever heard of doing that? Just skipping my period if its not here and taking BC for a week and then lupron for a week before starting stims?

[Lola9404]

Hi girls, I've decided that I'm ready to come back and start posting again, at least for the time being. It's been a month of pure hell but I finally feel as if we're starting to turn a corner. I started a blog and i think it's helping to write it all down.

A question for any of you who have m/c'd in the past. How long did it take before you were able to do another IVF? I am just now getting my period about 5 weeks after m/c and my beta numbers were still not down to zero as of last week (but must be now b/c i don't think I would be getting my period if they were not).

We're hoping to do another cycle in Sept or Oct but I am just curious for any 'real life' timelines.

I hope everyone is well. I'm really excited for those of you who got your BFP's. I also know that some of you are going through a hard time now, much like I was, so just know I'm here if you want to PM me...

xo
Lola

[Bellefior]

Well I finally did it. I am now a paid member of RESOLVE. After having another melt-down this week I figured it was time to do so and get myself into a professionally led support group. When I asked the social worker at our IVF center, she recommended going through them since they specifically deal only with IF. I'm now waiting to hear back regarding the group in my area. Anyone been to one of the RESOLVE groups and can fill me in on what to expect???

PS. Lola looks like there is a pretty good chance that we'll be cycling at the same time, unless the new RU recommends the surgery first.

[la_bride_2004]

(((Bellefior))) RESOLVE was a lifesaver for me. I went to one of their therapist led support groups for 10 weeks (1 time a week). I never had therapy before infertility, so the first few meetings were a bit rough- I wasn't used to talking about our IF struggles, only writing about them.

However, I found it incredibly helpful to share, learn, and vent with those in a similar situation. Also, the group became an incredible resource guide- between all of us we had seen nearly every doctor in town, done many IVF cycles, etc. and the ladies had tips on how to do injections to where to go for acupunture.

So sorry about the insurance stuff. We are in a non-mandated state, and yes, it bites to have to shell out the cash on top of everything else.

[Applebee]

Tigerest - I had a 42 day cycle after the first AF from my BFN with IVF #1. I went in for b/w and u/s because I thought I O'd late. They gave me a script for prometrium but called me that afternoon to say it looks like I had O'd late so if AF wasn't here within two weeks, then to start the script. I didn't have to take it b/c I started spotting. The thing is, I really didn't "bleed". I had more clotty type discharges. The strangest AF ever. I called my nurse and she said that was fine and I started my stims a few days later. Sorry if TMI!! I hope your insurance will cover the IVIg!! I have no idea exactly what kind of immune testing, I guess whatever I can get. I might know better once I have my follow-up on the 30th. All I know is that I feel my body is rejecting the embyos/blastocysts.

Bellefoir - I believe I have a buddy in another group that is a memeber of RESOLVE. She loves them. I did register w/them but haven't checked anything out yet.

Lola - welcome back! I hope you don't have to wait long.

Gator - any more info on what the doc told you? I tried googling it but didn't find anything about IF and that - then again, I suck at research.

[gator97]

Applebee- They suspect higher peripheral insulin levels. In my research, that pointed to either PCOS or Type II diabetes---but I have symptoms for neither. I have only been able to play phone tag with the nurse but she said in a message that the doctor didn't suspect either condition. You can have higher insulin levels without higher glucose levels. But that it may be causing me to react "PCOS-like" during stimulation. I'm having a much greater response than I should have based on the amount of meds they are giving me. So, they think I have higher quantity vs. quality. I'm still extremely confused and need to actually talk to the nurse. But I'm completely bummed b/c it seems I have low quality eggs and that makes me sadder than anything else in the IF journey so far. We'll see what the bloodwork says and cross our finger the Metformin makes a difference.

Hope the 30th gets here quickly for you. I know that time just seems like an eternity.

For those who have taken Metformin- I have read some very yucky
side effects. How bad is it?

Bellefior- let me know how you like Resolve. Our local chapter has once a month meetings. I haven't gone yet b/c some of the topics didn't relate--and the one time I really wanted to go, it was right after my transfer. Hoping it offers you some assistance.

Lola- I am so sorry that things have been rough for you. I'll be doing a cycle in October so perhaps we'll be on the same cycle!

Waving hi to everyone else.

[beevo12]

Sorry to butt in here like this but I have a friend who went through IVF. She took a HPT at 6days past a 3DT. Is this too early?? It was BFN BTW.

[Suzlywoozly]

Sorry to butt in here like this but I have a friend who went through IVF. She took a HPT at 6days past a 3DT. Is this too early?? It was BFN BTW.

For a 3DPT, that seems early. :)

[beevo12]

Thank you! What do you think would be a good day to test at home? She has a beta on Thursday and she'll be 12dp a 3dt

[amychris03]

I got a negative on an HPT at 8 days past a 3dt and a Postive at 10 days past a 3dt... Of course everyone is different though!

[gymwidow]

Hi ladies. Sorry I went MIA for a few days. Hectic week, and lost my internet connection at home for a bit, but I'm back!

Not much to report. We had our IVF class last Tuesday. It was long and not very exciting. I already knew about all the drugs and the schedule since I was already at the end of my "prep" month and I knew how to give myself most of the shots. We did learn how to mix the HCG and do the PIO shots. Everyone's eyes got huge when they saw the PIO needles! The nurse kept repeating that the really big needle is only for withdrawing the med from the bottle. All the guys got to practice stabbing a dummy in the butt, and DH has been practicing on me ever since with the Lupron shots. Unfortunately his first night doing it he managed to hit a blood vessel and gave me a giant bruise on my belly, so he got really upset about hurting me. I had to reassure him that I really hadn't felt it at all and the bruise doesn't hurt, and he's now getting more used to it.

I finished the BCP last Monday (woohoo!), started spotting on Wednesday, and got AF for real on Thursday. It wasn't a bad AF at all, maybe because of the Lupron. I'm basically done now and am ready to get started! I had some trouble connecting with my RE's office, so I didn't make it in for CD3 b/w and u/s on CD3, but it's not a big deal since I'm still taking Lupron, so I'm going in tomorrow on CD5. I expect all will be fine and that I'll get to start my Gonal-F shots tomorrow night. I'm so ready!

Suzly, I had another headache midweek that lasted for a day and a half, but have discovered that extra strength Tylenol rapid release gelcaps are magical. :) I understand how the fear can increase. I haven't even done one full IVF cycle yet, but so many IUIs got me into that pattern. Good luck!

Applebee, I hope this weekend was just as relaxing for you!

Tandis, how scary, but how cool that you found out there are TWO in there! Woohoo!

tigerest, it sounds like you have a good plan for going forward. I hope you get to skip those two weeks of BCP! I don't really know the answer to your question, but I guess it doesn't matter much since you'll get a period after finishing the pills, before starting your stims again.

Lola, I'm glad you're starting to come around that corner. I hope you're able to do another cycle sooner rather than later!

Bellefior, I think it's great you joined RESOLVE. I go to a therapist-led group at my RE's office and find it very therapeutic (sp?). It's good to just be able to sit around and talk IRL with other women who are going through the same thing.

[tigerest]

Lola - Hi. It is nice to see you posting again. I am so sorry you had to come back though. Hope everything works out and you get to cycle again very soon! {{HUGS}}

Bellefior - There aren't any support groups by me so tell me how it goes. :)

Applebee - Thank you for sharing your cycle info with me, that does make me feel better. The nurse told me that of course they like to go with your natural cycle, but it doesnt have to work that way. SO I guess I am ok.I really hope you get some answers at your appt. Good luck!

gator - I am sorry that there is another problem, but I am glad they found it. And I really hope the metformin helps your egg quality. I have heard things here and there that it helps! So hopefully that is all you need. Good luck!

gymwidow - Wow, you are ready! I'm very excited for you! Hope everything goes well with the stims! Good luck! :)

Well more bad news here. Got my prolactin results on Friday and they are still way too high. That is probably why AF still hasn't shown. I will find out tomorrow if my DR wants to increase my dose. Not looking forward to that because after 3.5 weeks on this medicine it really has my stomach messed up. I am sure they will want to retest me again in 2 weeks. If its not within normal range my cycle may get cancelled! :(

And I just got it confirmed! Insurance denied the IVIg because its "experimental". So right now I am trying to see who sells that stuff the cheapest!

[Sidsou]

Lola <hugs> My RE wanted me to wait 2 cycles after my #s hit zero (I had a m/c at 9 weeks). Not sure if this is standard or not. I do have problems responding to the stim meds normally so I may have been on the long side of waiting - it may not be quite this long for you.

Bellefior Good for you for joining! I haven't gone myself, but I've heard great things about it.

Gymwindow congrats on getting everything started! I'll just be a few days behind you.

Oops I gotta run... Hello to everyone!! I've been reading although not so good at posting. I start Lupron and stims both on Saturday! So anxious to get started!!

[Bellefior]

I know this is going to sound like a weird question, but I've done my center's video instructions for the injections (in anticipation that we will get the all clear in Sept/Oct, once I've followed up with the cardiologist)! They say that all the shots can be self administered, including the IM shots. I'm still trying to figure out how the hell you can give yourself a PIO shot in the butt (in the event that DH is not around)??? The person in the video instruction was able to do it, but I'm thinking her other job must be as a contortionist??? I've also heard about using the middle of the thigh one hand length above the knee as well. My center seems to prefer using the video instruction, but will set up a lesson if need be, which I will insist on. Like I told DH, I can watch brain surgery, doesn't mean I can do it!

[gymwidow]

tigerest, thanks. I'm sorry you didn't get better news. I hope tomorrow's news is better!

Sidsou, it will be great to have a cycle buddy!

Bellefior, our nurse showed us at class last week. Basically you have to stand in front of a mirror to see what you're doing, and be careful how you hold the syringe, but it can be done in the outer part of that upper outside quadrant of your butt. I don't plan to try if I can help it!


Not great news for me today. Even after 2 weeks on 10 units of Lupron daily, my estrogen level is high and I'm not fully suppressed. So I'm on 10 units for 3 more days and go back on Thursday for another round of b/w and u/s. I know it's not *bad* news, but I was all psyched up to start tonight and feel so disappointed that it's being postponed. :( At least now that I'm not starting yet, I don't feel bad about downing a can of Diet Coke. I need that caffeine to get rid of this headache!

[julesp313]

Hi everyone... just popping in to say things are good with me. I already stopped bleeding from the methotrexate and my levels are dropping nicely - going for weekly draws until they hit zero. DH and I both got back to the gym and then got our previously-retired "wants" list out and promptly crossed off two items - new mountain bikes for us both, and a dirt bike for me! Now we just need to find DH a dirt bike and we have another hobby - we have a 30 year old Honda 75 that is about the right size for a 10 year old kid, so DH on that is hilarious, but it runs like a dream and is great fun for pootling around on. We have a ton of trails just a half mile from our house and the local police don't mind you riding the dirt bike or quad on the streets from house to trail, so that is great fun. We've also discovered a ton of paved bike paths near us, hence the new mountain bikes.

Anyway, just wanted to say I'm still reading here and hoping and praying for everyone - keeping fingers crossed for more good news in here very soon!

[julesp313]

Also wanted to say to everyone who PM'd me, I am SO sorry that I took so long to reply, but this is the first time I've logged on to CC since I last posted, so I didn't even know I had PM's!

And one more thing... my "possible dysfunctional fimbriae" are not - dysfunctional, that is. The reason the RE said they might be is because my blood work way back when showed positive for chlamydia (or however the heck you spell it) but they didn't know what strain - if it was the sexually-transmitted one, that would suggest tube damage. If it was the bird-transmitted one (psitococcal or something), no damage - my gran had a parrot when I lived with her so that could have been it - or the pneumonic strain, again no damage. Turned out they ran more tests and confirmed it was the pneumonic strain, hence my bout with bronchitis as a child, and therefore definitely no damage caused by chlamydia. Sooooo... this is good news, as now the only issue we KNOW we have is my high FSH, and even though that might be a problem, my RE said judging by my reaction to the meds, I still have a number of good eggs in there. So, as DH said, let's send the swimmers in every single time we can! I think he just wants to get laid... ;)

[Sidsou]

Bellefior Hee Hee... It is a little funny to do it yourself. I just sat at the dining room table, got the syringe and everything ready, and then while sitting just twisted a little bit to see the upper outer area and injected. It really wasn't that bad at all. I found it easier to do while sitting since sitting kind of bumps up the area :) I had DH do it for awhile first before I had to do it myself (he was out of town for work). Just don't get so comfortable with the idea like I did once and accidentally forget to switch the needle and use the huge one (the one used to get the oil into the syringe) :eek:

Gymwindow Sorry you couldn't get started today. I know how it feels to be anxious to get started! I was surprised that they already told me that I would start on this Saturday, but I'm on a different protocal that has me start lupron right with the stimulants. Did they give you a possible date for ER or ET?

Jules Sounds like you got some good answers. How high is your FSH, if you don't mind me asking?

[gator97]

gymwidow-I think your reaction is perfectly understandable. You get yourself all geared up to start. .. any delay is really frustrating and a bit deflating.

Bellefior- sounds like Sidsou gave good advice--my friends who have done it themselves did the same procedure. They say it isn't too bad. I'm a bit scared of it still, though.

tigerest- why do they think that your prolactin levels are so high? Hope that the next few weeks bring different results and that your stomach can bear it.

jules- good to "see" you. Sounds like you and DH are doing fun things and that is great! Glad to hear your fimbriae are functioning properly. It's nice getting to cross an issue off the list!

Sidsou- yeah for starting on Saturday.

[Sebski]

I'm so behind! Something happened when CC updated the site (for lack of a better technical term)... my virus software was blocking ads and I couldn't figure out to fix it or the pop-ups. AGH! I finally got some help in the tech part of the board and voila! Here I am. :)

I have to go back and read up on what everyone's up too now, but I wanted to post some very belated <<<<hugs>>>> to kish and jules.

I'm waiting for AF this week. Supposed to start the BCP on cd3 and my meds are ordered, just waiting for them to arrive. I never thought I'd be looking forward to AF's arrival while TTC. ;)

Off to read up!

[Bellefior]

Well we finally made a firm decision about how we want to proceed with our TTC issues. All of this happened after DH had a minor meltdown when leaving the new RU's office (where we are in the process of seeking a second opinion). I'm not going to bore you all with the details, but suffice it to say that he is at a point where he is fed up with all of the testing. I can't say that I blame him. I'm sick of it too.

So the plan is as follows: we will plan on doing one cycle of IVF in the fall once all the pre-IVF work is completed (its looking like we'll probably cycle in October/November at this point). DH will also continue seeing the RU for the second opinion, and will have the surgery regardless of the outcome of the cycle. If the IVF takes the first time, great, and DH gets 9 months to heal from the surgery. If not then we are hoping to at least have some frozen embryos to transfer while DH recovers from the surgery. If don't have any embryos to freeze after the cycle, then we are going to wait to see if the surgery helped before doing anything further.

We are finally at peace with our decision because we believe it offers us the best of both worlds.

[julesp313]

Sidsou - I think my FSH was 11.3 when I had my prelim blood work pre-IVF. I know it can fluctuate monthly, but my RE said although it's higher than he'd like to see at my age (should be around 9), it isn't high enough to definitely prevent pregnancy. So... we just ignore it and hope for the best!

Work is SLOW. So I'm reading and catching up. :)

[Cath]

Hi everyone!

I hope you are all doing okay. I've been reading along, but haven't had much to say. No time for shoutouts right now because I have to run to catch my train home.

I just wanted to come by and give a very quick update from me.

We are still set for them to thaw my frozen eggs next Wednesday, August 30th, with a transfer tentatively set for Saturday, September 2nd or Monday, September 5th depending on fertilization (if anything fertilizes). My husband is scheduled to submit his sample for freezing this coming Friday so he doesn't have to worry about any 'game day' performance anxiety. :)

I have to say, monitoring for a frozen transfer at my clinic is easy compared to a stimulated cycle - I went in for ultrasound and bloodwork on the 16th (which they had thought would be CD2, but I didn't really get much AF this cycle, just spotting) and I'm going back for more fun on August 30th. I'm on estrogen injection every three days and a daily baby aspirin right now.

I'll be back for shoutouts tomorrow, but hope you are all doing well.

[gymwidow]

jules, glad to hear you doing pretty well. That's great that you can still keep trying if you want!

Sidsou, once I start stims, I'm estimating my ER will be about 10 days later. I respond really well to Gonal-F and am figuring it won't take long to get me ready! On one daily dose of 150mg, I had over a dozen follies ready in 8 days (for an IUI cycle). This time I'll be starting out with TWO daily doses of 200mg! So, if I start stims tomorrow, I'm figuring ER right around Labor Day.

gator, yeah, I'm just ready to get this going (and over with)!

Sebski, I hope AF shows soon!

Bellefior, I'm so glad for you. It's good to have a plan.

Cath, very exciting! I hope everything goes okay for your DH on Friday. And very glad to hear that monitoring has been a lot easier!


Nothing going on here. I'm anxiously awaiting my next monitoring tomorrow. My doc said if I'm still not fully suppressed, we may have to stop all meds and take a couple of weeks off and then try a different protocol. I REALLY don't want that. Please keep us in your thoughts tomorrow!

[Bellefior]

Question for anyone who has done a FET. Is there less of a chance of success with a FET than a fresh cycle? The reason I ask is because good friends of ours are going through the same thing and they were told there was less of a chance of success with a FET.

As you know, our plan was to do at least one fresh cycle with the hopes that we would have enough embryos to freeze to be able use those while DH has surgery for his varicocele and recovers if the fresh cycle does not work.

DH thinks that their opinion might be possibly be colored by the fact that they have undergone 3 IVF cycles (actually 2 IVF plus a FET) and have been unsuccessful. After their first cycle, there were no embryos to freeze, husband had the varicocele surgery, and after the second cycle they ended up with 10 embryos to freeze. The husband is attributing it to the better quality of his sperm after the surgery (though our doctor said that ICSI pretty much takes care of the whole quality issue). Their first two cycles resulted in BFNs and the 3rd resulted in a pregnancy which unfortunately ended in a miscarriage fairly recently, so they really aren't in the best frame of mind right now as far as TTC issues are concerned.

Even though we are in the same geographical area, they are going to a different facility than we are. Ours is significantly more successful in terms of outcome, so we are taking what they say with a grain of salt. Their situation is also slightly different than ours in that there are both male and female issues involved (ours is MFI only). DH says we should put our trust in what the REs at our facility tell us and have confidence in the fact that we are being treated at the best facility in the area (well maybe with the exception of the RU there, whose attitude resulted in us getting a second opinion elsewhere, but we pretty much llike everyone else and have total confidence in our RE). He also said that perhaps the less this couple knows about what our specific plans are, the better off we will be because of the somewhat negative vibes we've been getting from them about the process in general. We really want to focus on thinking positively to maximize our chance for success.

Thoughts anyone?

[amychris03]

Bellefior
This sums it up pretty good I think...
http://health.ivillage.com/infertility/infertivf/0,,5l2c,00.html

Basically I think it just depends where you go. I know that my
clinic has a really good success rate for FET's, but it varies from
clinic to clinic. Maybe you could ask your RE what their success
rate is for the two.

I do think what you said is true, probably giving your friend less info
is better, you don't want to just hear the negatives, each case is very different. I had a friend who used the same dr as we did, we both had very different protocols and very different experiences with the same staff. We both ended up PG, and theirs ended in miscarriage unfortunately. When we last talked, she told me everything that the facility had done "wrong" and to be honest, I didn't want to hear it because that was not the situation with me and I didn't want my next experience to be tainted before I go in, ya know?

[Bellefior]

Amy, thanks for the link. I've checked it out as well as the FET success rates for my clinic. My clinic does have the highest success rate in our area for FET, even though they are doing less of them than some of the other clinics. It's significantly higher where we are going compared to where our friends are (though lower than the success rate for fresh cycles at our center).

Because of how strongly we feel about our religion (we're Catholic) and because we are very uncomfortable with the idea of leaving embryos frozen "in limbo", DH and I both just feel that we would have to use any frozen embryos first before reverting to another fresh cycle (regardless of any difference in success rates between the two). We're also considering the fact that we don't have insurance coverage for this in our decision, and a frozen cycle is a lot cheaper than a fresh cycle (hopefully there will be something to freeze when we finally get this show on the road).

I'm finding that sometimes when dealing with these issues, with certain people, sometimes the less they know is better.

[gymwidow]

Bellefior, from what I've read, there may be a slight difference in embryo quality from a fresh v. frozen cycle (because of the trauma to the embryos in the freezing and thawing process).


As for me, well, you have to give me this - if I do something, I give it 100%! Now that my body has gotten the hang of ovulating, it does not seem to want to stop. The Lupron is failing to suppress my production of FSH and my estrogen levels are continuing to go up and I am producing follicles.

Basically, my body REALLY sucks.

We have to wait now and see if I will produce a follicle that will mature and be ready to ovulate. I'm continuing to take the Lupron for 4 more days and will return to the doc on Monday for another round of b/w and u/s. If my estrogen goes down, then great, we can start the stims and continue on with this cycle. If it continues to rise and I have a mature egg, then we will trigger ovulation, wait for my next period, and then start again with a different type of suppression drug. Either way, we're looking at a delay of several weeks before we get anywhere near an ER or ET.

I am so upset. I know it's just a delay, but we've been trying so long and been through so many treatments and had to wait this long to just to get off the damn BCP and now to be told that we have more weeks to wait is really hard. We had planned our next few weeks around this, and now it's going to get hard because later in September we get really busy and stay that way for a while. I'm so frustrated with my body and with Mother Freakin' Nature and with having to just sit around and do nothing and not be able to control anything. :(

Sigh. I can't wait to go home and drown my sorrows in ice cream.

[Cath]

Hi everyone -

I know I said I'd be back for shout outs, but I'm so far behind that I'll just start with recent ones.

gymwidow - sorry this is so frustrating for you and that your body refuses to cooperate. I think most everyone here completely understands that feeling. The delays really suck and there is nothing worse than being in a holding pattern. Unfortunately, a lot of times, I think what our Dr's are doing is a crapshoot and waiting to see what works. Hopefully, the continued lupron will do what it needs to do for this cycle. Enjoy your ice cream.

Belle - I didn't look at Amy's link, so I don't know what it says about FETs, but there is a slight decrease in success rates using frozen embryos. As I understand it, another factor that varies by clinic is the quality of the embryos that they will freeze. Some clinics will freeze all the embryos they can (big generalization, I know) and others will only freeze the most viable ones. I wouldn't be surprised if your clinic is one of the more selective ones since you say they do less FETs and your friend's clinic is less selective. I'm Catholic as well and hear you on the decision to use all embryos before moving onto another fresh cycle.

Nothing new with me, other than the fun side effects of taking estrogen - my chin looks like I'm a teenager with the fun pimples I've developed over the last couple of days. That will clear up if things go okay and I make it to transfer and start taking progesterone. Good times.

Hope everyone else is hanging in there.

Catherine

[Sebski]

Hi ladies... AF arrived today and so did my meds. What an overwhelming delivery that was! Anyway, I go in for cd3 b/w and u/s on Saturday. If my FSH isn't skyhigh I will start the bcp that day. I'm supposed to take it through 9/8 (2w) and then start Lupron. I'm going to be taking 40 units of that daily and then I'm going to be taking 500 units of Gonal F as well. I don't know how long I'll be taking the lupron or gonal f for though. My nurse didn't give me dates... she said to take it 1 step at a time starting w/ the bcp's. Question - does this sound like high doses of Lupron and Gonal F to you? The lupron I'm taking 2x's a day (20 units each) and the Gonal F is also 2x's a day (225 units). I have high FSH so I'm wondering if that's the reason for the dosages? It's the Micro-Dose Flare Lupron protocol. I'm just so afraid of oversuppressing due to the high FSH. May's level was 12.3... then I had a chem pregnancy so they couldn't measure June's. Early July's was 16.1 :eek: (but I think it was from the chem pregnancy) and then my last cycle was back down to 12. I'm so worried about my level this time around... I'm chugging water like crazy!!! I read somewhere that water can help? Not sure if it's true or not, but I did it w/ the last batch of cd3 b/w and the results came back lower. Who knows, can't hurt.

Oh - my nurse told me that we *just* made their cutoff for cycling. They stop cycling after 9/14 due to their lab closing in Oct for cleaning (3w) and we should start injectibles by 9/11 she said. WHEW! Otherwise, we'd have to wait until November! :eek:

[tigerest]

Sorry drive by post! I leave at 6am tomorrow for MI for a wedding and I haven't even started packing!!!

gymwidow - SO sorry...how frustrating!

Suzly - Good luck tomorrow!!!


Some good news for me...AF finally decided to show up!! YAYAYAYAY!! :D And I had my prolactin retested with fasting this time and it is well within range! BUT it seems like food makes my prolactin go up, so nowI have to stay on this med until I get PG!

We have also decided to go with the IVIG, and after calling around everywhere, MDR happened to be the cheapest...$2000 cheaper than anywhere else!


Ok, sorry I couldn't do complete so's! Good thoughts to all.....

[Bellefior]

Gymwidow I can agree with you 100% that it is truly frustrating when our bodies don't do what they are supposed to do. Hoping you enjoyed your ice cream--I personally find that a butterscotch sundae does the trick for me.

Cath wishing you luck with the thaw and transfer.

Sebski yay for finally getting started on your protocol!

Tiger have fun at the wedding.

*************

Believe it or not, we will have jumped through the last few hoops (aka medical tests and appointments) by next week--this is assuming cardiology doesn't want any additional tests after I meet with them. We started the IF testing in April and it absolutely boggles my mind how many tests and appointments we've had. I know I complain that my insurance sucks since it doesn't cover any ART procedures, but thank God it covers the IF workup otherwise we'd never be able to afford it.

We meet with the RE again on 9/12 and should have a pretty good idea of what we are doing when. DH and I pretty much decided that even though our immediate families, close friends, and my co-workers know we will be doing IVF, we are going to keep the when and as much of the details as possible to ourselves, although I think the cat will be let out of the bag at work once I actually miss some days for retrieval and transfer. Fortunately, the hospital is just down the street from my office, so I won't be missing a lot of time for monitoring appointments, maybe none at all since they do them all real early in the morning.

Ever since we've made the decision and have known for certainty what we are going to do, I've found that a certain sense of calm has come over me. I think this is an indication that I am finally at peace with all of this and this is the right decision for us.

Have a great weekend everyone!

[Tandis]

Sebski - I did the Flare Protocol, and my meds were really similar to yours. 20 units of Microdose Lupron and 150 units of Follistim twice a day. The MDL is a diluted version of regular lupron, so it won't suppress you nearly as much as the regular stuff. I ended up getting nine eggs retrieved, though only five were mature enough to fertilize.

My levels with the Clomid Challenge was 9 on CD3, and 13.8 on CD10 - so I think we're in range of each other with our FSH numbers.

Good luck and glad you were just able to make the cutoff.

Tigerest - Glad your prolactin levels went down. That's so weird that food effects it. Did you Dr. have any reason why that's happening? Glad you were able to find the Ivig cheaper.

Cath - Glad you're finally getting to do your FET! Good luck!

Gymwidow - So sorry you're body isn't cooperating. Hopefully you're body will figure it out over the weekend. Keeping my fingers crossed for you!

Belle - That's terrific that you've finally found the peace and calm of making the right decision. Makes a big difference in all this, doesn't it?

Waving hi to everyone I missed!

[gymwidow]

Cath, a crapshoot it is. My RE says that it's an "inefficient" system. Tell me about it! How are you doing this week? Are things looking good for your transfer?

Sebski, I'm glad you made it in for this cycle! My RE's office just closed last month for their cleaning, so we're good for a while now. I hope your check this weekend went well and that you were able to start the drugs.

tigerest, yay for AF! (for now!) That's great that you found someplace with a decent price for the IVIG.

Bellefior, I'm so glad you're feeling good about your decisions. It helps to know what you want to do!

Tandis, hi!


CD12 here for me and it looks like I'll be triggering tonight. Hmph. I had an 18.6 mm follie on my right ovary and another 4-5 that were in the 12 mm range. Just waiting for my estrogen b/w to come back, but by the looks of my insides, it'll probably still be high enough for them to have me trigger and O. Figures! I met with a nurse to go over the mixing of the HCG again and DH is prepared to give me the shot tonight. We'll go ahead and BD tomorrow night and Wednesday and see if we can make a miracle baby happen. If not, I'll wait out my next AF (no progesterone supps this time) and go in on my next CD3 and hope to start then.

The RE explained it to me this way: Lupron is an agonist, meaning it initially causes your brain to make FSH and estrogen, and then in its second phase, it's supposed to make the estrogen levels drop. My brain seemingly never got the second message, so my estrogen continued to go up. Next time we'll go with an antagon protocol, using antagonists. Those drugs don't first stimulate the making of the hormones, they suppress only. So if I go in on CD3 next time, without having taken Lupron or anything else before that could stimulate my body into making follies, I should be able to start right away on Gonal-F, and I guess the other suppression drug. At least this means no more BCP! Yay for that!

Given that I usually get AF about 12DPO, I estimate that my next CD3 will be 2 weeks from Wednesday. And if I respond as well as I usually do to the stims, then ER will probably end up being right about the time my DH is supposed to leave town for a business trip in September. Sigh. Oh, well, we'll deal with that when we get to it!

[Cath]

Hi everyone!

I hope you are all doing well and enjoying the last few days of official summer! :)

Gymwidow - inefficient is right. There are times where I feel like I'm a big science experiment! So what did your estrogen look like when it came back? I'll keep my fingers crossed for you that a miracle happens this month, but at least you already have a plan for going forward and don't have to wait for a negative beta.

Tandis - thanks for the good wishes.

Belle - Thanks for the good luck. It sounds like you are getting comfortable with the idea. It is definitely an adjustment period knowing you need medical help for something that comes so easily to most of the population. Hopefully, you'll stop getting assvice from your coworkers and friends! ;)

Tigerest - That's great that you were able to find a place that does the ivig so much cheaper. Still sucks that you have to do it, but we've all been there. Hang in there.

Sebski - That first look at all the medication and the accompanying paraphernalia is scary. Were you able to start your cycle? Your medication sounds high to me, but I'm always on super low doses of everything because I respond too well to everything. That's great that you'll make their cutoff for cycling though. That would be really frustrating to have to wait a month because of the lab closing.

As for me, things are looking pretty good for this cycle. I had an ultrasound and bloodwork appointment this morning (instead of tomorrow like I was originally told) and, according to the RE, my lining is "textbook." I'm still waiting on the phone call for instructions, but it looks like they will thaw my eggs out tomorrow. DH has an appointment to produce a sample at 9:30 tomorrow, but they have his frozen sample from last week in case he isn't able to. Pending fertilization, we should have a transfer on Saturday or Monday. Please keep your fingers crossed that we get some good embryos!

To be honest, I'm a little worried about egg quality since there were so many at retrieval (39) and they've been frozen for the last eight weeks. I guess there's always something to fret about.

Hi to everyone I missed!

[Sidsou]

GymWindow I'm so sorry that you have to wait :( It totally sucks when our bodies just don't cooperate. My last IVF cycle, despite taking all sorts of meds of course, I only had one follicle :mad: , so it was converted to an IUI. I kind of know how you feel. <<<Hugs>>> You never know, you might just have the one follicle that's needed ;)

Sebski Actually those meds sound pretty close to what I'm taking now. 20 of lupron and 450 of follistism. I also have a highish FSH - as high as 14.5, but last testing was only 11. I know with me, as long as I have follicles, they'll do the IVF. They never checked my FSH for that. My high FSH for me indicates that I don't respond well to the stimulants. I go tomorrow for monitoring, so I'll let you know if they raise me even higher to try to get things going. I don't know why but I also have the impression that drinking a lot of water will help too (?) not quite sure why or where I heard this, but I figured it couldn't hurt.

I'm off for monitoring tomorrow to see if the meds are working on me. I'm so anxious to know what's going on.

Cath Fingers and toes crossed!! Wow - 39!! You need to send me some of your good follicle growth vibes :)

[gymwidow]

Cath, I get that feeling, too. Especially when I'm on the phone with my doc and keeps changing his mind as we speak as to what protocol he wants to try next with me. He seems to have settled on this antagon one, though, so hopefully that will be it! My estrogen was still up, but now we're hoping for that miracle, so keep those fingers crossed for a while longer, please. :) Mine are absolutely crossed for you and I'll be thinking of you tomorrow and throughout the weekend.

Sidsou, oh, that really must have sucked. I felt awful enough having the cycle canceled before even starting the stims; I can't imagine having gone through all of that first and then getting the news. Hopefully this will be the one lucky one and DH's boys will be feeling good and motile during at least one of our sessions..... ;) I hope your monitoring goes well tomorrow and that you get some good news!


We did trigger last night - wow was that scary at first. I knew it wouldn't really hurt, but I never paid much attention to the needle when the nurses would give me the shot at the RE's, so seeing it up close gave me a few moments of freak-out. But other than a little pinch when it first went in, I really didn't feel a thing. DH did great and I'm so proud of him.

So, now we BD our little hearts out and then wait. The nurse said if we don't get lucky, then I might have a shorter-than-normal LP, which is actually fine by me because that means we can start over just a little bit sooner. I'm really dreading having to wait another 2 weeks, wondering if perhaps we got our miracle, or just doing nothing and waiting for things to start up again.

In good news, my doctor's office re-coded my last 3 monitoring visits so that they can be submitted to my insurance company. So our prepaid IVF cycle is intact and ready to use next month. That's a relief!

[gymwidow]

Well, this just gets better and better. I got a call today from my RE's office, informing me oh-so-casually that after taking my HCG shot on Monday, I should get AF w/in 4-6 weeks and that I'll likely have to postpone my IVF cycle until the end of October! (First of all, weeks?!?! I questioned that and she said, "oh, or sooner." Uh, yeah!) It turns out that the embryology lab is closing from Sept 26 - Oct 20. I thought they had closed in July and that I was fine for a while, but they actually had just opened back up in July after having been closed in June. So, if I don't get AF by Sept. 10, I'm postponed again until the end of October. AND even if I get AF by Sept. 10, there's no guarantee I'll get in for this cycle since they're really booked up.

Since I typically have really short LPs, even while taking progesterone supps, I'm hopeful that AF will show up within the next 10 days and I'll be okay. Otherwise, I just don't know what we'll do. We have a family wedding on Oct. 21 and are supposed to go out of town the next weekend, and then are throwing a huge party on Nov. 4. We could postpone a cycle till after that, I suppose, but then we get bogged down with Thanksgiving, when we're supposed to be out of state with family. And besides all of that, I just can't handle more delays! I am so tired of endless dr's appointments and shots and drugs and emotions and I just want to be done with this. Today a friend of mine is giving birth to her second child. I remember when she announced her pregnancy back in January. We had just found out our second medicated cycle had failed and I was really upset. DH kept comforting me by telling me that we'd be pregnant ourselves by the time she gave birth, and here we are with no end in sight.

Sigh, sorry to be such a downer today. I'm just feeling sorry for myself and trying to hold it together long enough to get some work done and then hopefully leave a little early. I think it's a good day to go home and snuggle with my dog and watch movies in bed.

Hugs to all.....

[tigerest]

sebski - Glad you made it in for this cycle. That does sound like high doses of meds to me, but I don't have high FSH so my amounts would be different. If you are still worried I would double check with them. Good luck this cycle!

Bellefior - Glad you are feeling good about your IVF cycle. Good luck.

Tandis - I need to ask my DR still about the food affecting my prolactin levels? I wonder if its a sign of another problem? I don't meet with him until the 12th though.

Cath - Good luck! I hope your eggs thaw ok and fertilize ok! Keep us posted!!!

gymwidow - All that timing stuff sucks! I really hope you either get PG from this cycle or AF shows up right on time! Good luck!

Well I am back from the wedding. It was nice, but it was a little hard to see all of DH's cousins with kids. We were pretty much the only married one's without kids. But the rest of the trip was nice and pretty relaxing. Of course, I just got back last night and I am already a stress case. Was on the phone with insurance this morning, traffic sucked, and have all these issues to take care of at work. Bleh...

I start lupron on Sat...so my cycle has begun! So all I need to do now is order my IVIg! I can't believe I am doing it! I am a little scared, but I am doing it all this cycle! Its probably our last real shot! EEK!

Hope you are all hanging in there!

[Bellefior]

What is it with doctor's offices managing to piss people off today? DH got a call out of the blue from the urologist # 1's office today from the secretary telling him that their office was not going to treat him anymore. No explanation as to why or what the reason was. I'm thinking that since the RE's office was talking about putting my DH on antibiotics but wanted to confirm that with the RU's office first that's what the call might have been about, but we had this discussion with them 3 weeks ago and the RU's office never got back to us so we assumed it was ok. DH said to him that it sounded like he was getting dropped as a patient but isn't sure. So I left very strongly worded messages at both my RE's office and the RU's office asking them WTF and for an explanation. If by not treating him means you are not going to prescribe antibiotics, then fine, tell him that.

DH was so pissed off by the attitude of the secretary and the lack of information that he told them straight out not to worry about it and actually told them we were seeking a second opinion and had a doctor that is willing to look at treatment options. This just totally reaffirms our decision to get the second opinion from a different RU who is at least more sympathetic (even if the advice is the same), has better people skills, and has a staff that doesn't leave its patients in the dark or guessing. IF is hard enough to deal with without throwing a doctor who is unsympathetic or has zero people skills into the mix. I also plan on telling my RE what I think of urologist #1s and his staff's bedside manner when it comes to talking to their patients, especially since he provides services to their office.

Oh, and the kicker. When I called the RU's office, the answering service responded, telling me no one was in the office because it was lunch time. I have never heard of a doctor's office at a hospital in which the entire staff takes lunch at the same time.

[Cath]

I really feel like I'm on pins and needles today, anxious about what might be happening to my eggs in the lab today. It's funny, since this isn't a stimulated cycle, I feel so uninvolved in the process. Even though I wasn't a fan of the daily visits for bloodwork and wanding, I at least felt like I was doing something. This time, two visits, two weeks apart to check lining and an estrogen shot every three days. No bruising, no place to play connect the dots on my stomach, nothing. It's very surreal for me in comparison to my other cycles.

I did confirm that there were 30 eggs frozen. The other 9 were not frozen because they were going to try to fertilize them the day after retrieval if my DH had been able to produce a sample. I also don't think those 9 were completely mature the day of retrieval.

Anyway, like I said, I'm anxious. My nurse will call me today if she gets a report about how many eggs made it through the thaw, and will definitely call me tomorrow with an update on fertilization.

Thanks everyone for the good luck and crossed fingers for fertilization!

Belle - Seriously! Oh my gosh, I can't believe the RU's office would do that. It sounds like you definitely made the right choice to get a second opinion. Sometimes, Drs. offices really suck.

Tigerest - Yeah for starting your cycle (even though lupron sucks). :)

Gymwidow - Oh good grief, it seems like all drs. offices today have their heads stuck up their arses! Well, fingers are double crossed for you - that you get lucky this month, or that if not it's a short LP. Being delayed really would suck! Glad that the trigger wasn't too difficult - the needles really are daunting.

Sidsou - I may make lots of eggs, but I still don't know if they are any good or not. Personally, I think they might be crap, but I just don't know yet. Hopefully the meds are working for you!

Hi to everyone else. Hope you are all doing well.

edited to add: they were able to thaw out 14 eggs.

[Applebee]

Hi all!

I had my follow-up today :( Basically my doctor told me he thinks donor eggs would be best for us. He feels it's an egg quality. We will do one more fresh cycle, then a frozen if necessary and that's it w/this facility. I did get him to do some genetic testing via bloodwork and one immune test (ANA). He said he really didn't want to do PGD as that can compromise the embryo and that's one thing he didn't want to do since we only get 2-4 "quality" embryos at the time of ET.

Donor eggs...not an option for us. DH is dead set against it. He said "I want a baby with you, your DNA, your face, your toes - not another woman's". As much as I love what he said, it hurts like hell to think that we will never have a child.

So, I'm to call on CD1 and set up my next fresh cycle.

I'm sorry for the drive by and no shout outs, but I promise to be back by the weekend, if not earlier.

[Bellefior]

Just wanted to update that I heard back from the RE's office and told the nurse about the cryptic message. She asked me "what does Dr. so and so won't be treating him mean?" I told her, "I don't know, you tell me." Thankfully, the urologist's b-tch nurse put a note in the record on the computer explaining that it was a reference to DH's not being placed on antibiotics. Why the hell didn't she just say that? All she said, and I checked with DH, was that Dr. So and So would not be treating him.

I also explained to the RE's nurse about the issue we had had with the RU's bedside manner and was very specific about what he had said to us in our consult visit with him that pissed us off so much. He said during our meeting something along the lines of that because my husband smokes (actually smoked-gave it up after the bar exam) and is slightly overweight--both of which could play a role in MFI--why would we want to go through IVF if he was just going to slowly kill himself anyway! I kid you not! Seriously, we knew before we went in there that the smoking didn't help and we know he needs to lose weight, he wasn't telling us anything we didn't know. But when you have a couple coming in for a fertility consult, you better have an element of sympathy (or at least pretend to have one), you don't talk to us like this guy did and make someone feel like somehow they are at fault. It's hard enough as it is without anyone else making you feel worse. The doctor we went to for the second opinion at least had a lot more compassionate attitude, even if in the end his advice is the same as RU #1.

I also told my RE's nurse (who was appropriately appalled at what I told her and said we should never have been made to feel that way) that even if we hadn't had the issue with his bedside manner, the fact that it took about a month to get back to us about the antibiotics didn't exactly inspire confidence in us or in how he treats his patients or the importance he places on them. I also explained that we had gone for the second opinion, but we were still going ahead with the IVF there as planned, just that in the future, if my husband needed a urologist, we would not be going to the one in that practice, though the RE was free to order any tests on him she deemed necessary. I also made it clear to her that everyone else there had been wonderful except for that one doctor, and we had no issues with any of them. She did suggest that maybe we should speak with the nurse manager in the IVF unit and raise this issue with her, because it was serious enough to do so. She gave me her name and we left it that I or DH would call her if we wanted to pursue it further.

Oh, and the final frosting on it all. I also left a message for the RU's office to call me at the same time I left the one for my RE. Guess which office I still haven't heard back from yet??? I've stopped asking myself whether or not we made the right choice going to another RU for a second opinion.


Will try to get to shout outs tommorrow...

[tigerest]

Bellefior - Wow, I can't believe that RU. Glad you found another one!

Cath - 14 is a great number! I am hoping you get a great number tomorrow too! I am on pins and needles for you too! Good luck! :)

Applebee - I am so sorry about your consult. No matter how much you try to prepare yourself, it is always hard when your Dr suggests donor eggs or surrogate(in my case). Your DH is sweet for saying that. Hopefully, you wont have to worry about that, and the next cycle will work.

[Cath]

Hi ladies!

I have a new favorite number! :) I just got the call from my nurse with the fertilization report. Of the 14 eggs that survived the thaw, the embryologist was able to fertilize 12 of them. Of those 12, 11 look like they are doing something.

She'll call again tomorrow. Now, I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that they will divide. To tell you all the truth, I know that so many things can go wrong still, but right now I just feel so giddy.

Tigerest - thanks for the good luck! :)

Applebee - I'm so sorry about your consult. I can only imagine how difficult it is getting the recommendation to go to donor eggs.

Belle - All I can say is 'WOW!'

[gymwidow]

tigerest, thanks. I'm glad you had a pretty good time, despite all the kiddos around. I hope you're a little less stressed today! Yay for starting your cycle this weekend!!!

Bellefior, sheesh. I'm glad you were able to let them know how you feel and that they seem pretty responsive. Hopefully everything will go more smoothly after this and you won't have to deal with the annoying RU at all anymore.

Cath, thanks. I really don't want any more delays. I hate wasting time. Your news is AWESOME! I'm keeping everything crossed that those 11 little guys keep on growing.

Applebee, I'm sorry the news wasn't better. I hope that the next cycle is able to produce plenty of hearty embryos ready to grow into hearty babies.


Nothing doing here. We BD'd again last night and I'm now 1DPO. Boring, boring, boring! :rolleyes:

[tigerest]

Cath - Congrats thats wonderful news! I hope they keep on dividing!!! Go embryos!

gymwidow - I actually do feel less stressed, imagine that! ;) 1DPO huh? Well I hope it goes by quickly!

Anyone have any exciting holiday plans? We are just going to be working on the house ALL weekend! At least we wont have to be stuck in traffic. :rolleyes:

[Cath]

Hi ladies -

Tigerest - My holiday plans are lying in bed and watching movies. Oh, I'm also hoping to get an embryo transfer in there one day. :) thanks for the congrats on fertilized embryo numbers!

Gymwidow - Sorry you're in a boring part of the cycle. I have a feeling your DH enjoyed the couple of days, though. ;)

As for me, I'm cautiously optimistic. Everything is going better than anyone expected. I have 8 cleaved embryos right now and I'm tentatively scheduled for a 3 day transfer tomorrow. My nurse, who I thought was an idiot as recently as a month ago before she became my new nurse, was telling me how excited the embryologist was since he wasn't expecting results like this with frozen eggs.

If you don't hear from me before Sunday, assume I'm having a 3 day transfer and my husband will be policing the 24 hour bedrest thing.

[Bellefior]

No time for shout outs today but wanted to wish everyone a great holiday weekend and send good luck wishes to Cath for your transfer!

[tigerest]

Cath - Whoohoo! Those are wonderful results so far! Good luck with your transfer and enjoy your rest!

[Tandis]

Good luck Cath! Those numbers sound fantastic! Keeping my fingers crossed for you :D

[Bellefior]

Just wanted to update before I take off from the weekend. I spoke with the RE's office today and our workup is complete :D !!!!!! It now gets submitted to the committee to determine our protocol and we need to take care of the financial details, but when I talked to the nurse, looks like we could possibly be ready to start by October, November at the latest!

[gator97]

Oh my goodness. I am SO far behind. There is no way that I can catch up on SOs.

Cath- great numbers! When you impress the embryologist, that is pretty awesome. Think of all that they have seen.

Bellefior- woohoo! for being done your work up.

My blood glucose and insulin came back normal. However RE wants to try me on metformin anyway. So, I started that last night. Should start BCP next week to get moving on a new cycle. I should get my protocol in the mail tomorrow.

Have a wonderful holiday weekend! I'll try to do better at keeping up. This thread is hopping all of a sudden.

[Sidsou]

Cath Yeah!! It's sounds like those embroyos are doing great! We're all thinking of you!

Gymwindow Hoping this wait goes by quickly for you unless of course the BDing did the trick ;)

Bellefior Wow - I can't believe the arrogance of some doctors!! The fact that an RU would say that!! I'm so happy to hear that the workup is complete and you guys are on your way.

Applebee Sorry to hear the RE say that. But don't give up hope. A friend of mine (whose eggs literally fell apart when she did her first IVF, so they told her she would probably have to do donor eggs) is expecting twins now (with her own eggs).

Tigerest Yeah for getting started!

Good news for me - I'm responding to the meds! Nothing impressive, but for me it's good. I have 5 that are all in the low teens right now (a few smaller ones too), so they have me coming in daily now for ultrasounds and bloodwork. 5 for me is very good since I only had one during my last IVF cycle. I'm just hoping that they'll all be nice and mature and want to fertilize. This is probably our last try, so hopefully we can get to a transfer.

[julesp313]

Just reading along and sending out good thoughts and prayers to Cath for your transfer and everyone else for a good cycle and fabulous results.

DH and I are off to NorCal tomorrow to spend the weekend with his family - luckily, MIL and I already talked about the miscarriage so hopefully she won't feel the need to bring it up. I'm still bleeding slightly, but no more pain so that's good.

Also found my cure for post-IVF-failure-induced-depression - buy a new car. Yeah, not the most fiscally responsible thing to do but I'd promised myself a new car if the cycle failed, so today we brought home the new toy. I'm very excited, though not quite as excited as i would have been if we'd been buying a new car to put a baby in. Bittersweet... :)

[Sebski]

Cath GOOD LUCK!!! :) So excited to hear about the transfer!

Tandis thanks for posting about your flare protocol - I hope I'm as lucky as you were with its results! ;)

Sidsou I'm so happy to have someone cycling close to me on pretty much the same dosages!!! I read that you responded w/ 5 follies - hats off to those buggers!!! May I ask how long you were taking your meds for in order to get that result? Just curious how long it can take a fellow high-FSH'r to see that type of follie result.

Gymwidow that royally sucks about the lab cutoff. I know how you feel. Waiting for CD1 w/ this cycle was TORTURE because all I heard was the tick tick tick of the lab clock. I hope AF arrives soon enough for you and that you can squeeze into their schedule!

Applebee so sorry for that consult... major <<<hugs>>>

Jules congrats on the new car & safe travels to NorCal! :)

As for me... I'm still taking the BCP and will continue doing so until 9/8. I'm supposed to go in for an u/s and b/w on the 8th and talk about starting the Lupron then. I'm assuming the Gonal F won't be far behind? But, who knows. My RE's office isn't very friendly w/ giving out dates for some reason. :rolleyes: We were away for the last week and I specifically asked my nurse to call me on my cell if she needed me. I came home today to a message on my home machine to call her and talk about dates... she left that message on 8/28! UGH! I had been checking work voicemail and had my cell on all week long. I'm assuming if it were urgent that she would have called me on my cell right? They usually do that. I'm just annoyed because I've been fretting about the scheduling of things since we have a TON of family obligations coming up in Sept... literally every w/e is full w/ christenings, weddings and other sorts of parties. And, since nobody knows that we're doing IVF, we're going to need to plan excuses in case we need to bow out of some family obligation. Man, if only doctors and nurses could follow our instructions! ;)

[Sidsou]

Julesp313 <<<Hugs>>> Enjoy your new car even if you didn't get it for the best reason.

Sebski I know how hard it can be to plan things especially if no one knows whats going on. My best advice is to plan to go to things (assuming you don't have to fly) and then have good excuses as to why you can't go if it happens to fall on one of the days of the ER or ET, or bedrest. I'm thinking a good case of a fever and the chills, sore throat (flu - but don't throw in throwing up otherwise you'll have people wondering if you are pregnant). Your husband can first catch it for the ER (you want to stay with him since he is feeling so sick), and then magically you catch the flu 3 to 5 days later and really just have to stay in bed since you are so sick. As for the timing, I would have to guess that I would be on the early side since it looks like my ER will be even before the estimate range they gave me. I stopped taking BCPs on the 23rd, had a baseline ultrasound on the 26th, started lupron on the 26th (20 units), and then started the follistism on the 27th (450). My lupron decreased to 5 on the 30th, but my follistism has stayed right at 450. I go for another ultrasound tomorrow morning (had one this morning and yesterday morning). They are saying that it looks like Tuesday for the retreival for me. Like I said, I'm pleased to have 5 all at about the same size, and a few smaller ones but those probably won't make it. Hope that helps. Feel free to ask more questions - this is only my first time on this protocal, but my doctors seem to be pretty pleased too with the results so far.

[Sebski]

Sidsou thanks so much for the suggestions on how to get out of the obligations... the flu thing might work perfectly! :) Wow - retrieval on Tuesday - you are on the fast track! I hope everything goes smoothly for you!!!

[gymwidow]

tigerest, did you get a lot done this weekend? What kind of work are you doing to the house?

Cath, I've been thinking about you this weekend. I hope all went well and that you've got some little embryos snuggling into you now!

Bellefior, that's great! At the rate I'm going, we might end up cycling together. :)

gator, I hope you can get started soon!

Sidsou, woohoo to a good response to the meds! I hope those little guys are growing!

jules, sounds like a good plan to me. My DH will probably want to get himself a new car if our IVF fails. Actually, he'll probably want to get one anyway! I hope you enjoy it!

Sebski, I was supposed to do a non-flare Lupron protocol and was on Lupron for a week together with BCP, and then stopped the BCP and continued on Lupron. Had I responded to it, I would have started the Gonal-F 2 weeks after starting. I assume you'll have a much shorter time frame on Lupron before starting the stims. Good luck! I'm sorry you had such a frustrating time with your RE's office. Mine always asks where to call me and I always tell them work, but I have to keep my cell phone out anyway because for some reason they always seem to call on that number. Grrr!


6DPO here and having mild panic attacks about "what if" I don't make the cutoff for the next cycle. I really don't know how I'll handle having another 6-week delay. The last 6 weeks have been hard enough. I'm sure I will, if I have to, but I really don't want to have to go through the disappointment and heartache of waiting even longer. I've been spotting since 1DPO, but that's typical and I'm sure it's not anything AF-related. Yet. This is one time I think I'll be relieved if/when AF shows up less than 10 days after O! For now, I'm imagining FPS (mild cramps and mildly sore boobs) and daydreaming of how awesome it would be to call up my RE and tell him "nevermind about the IVF!" ;)

[Sidsou]

Gymwindow Fingers crossed for a "nevermind" call to your doc ;)

They got 4 today! Hopefully we'll have good fertilization results tomorrow and some little ones determined enough to make it until Friday for the transfer!!

[Bellefior]

Well I just found out yet another one of DH's cousins is expecting again....or actually, his wife is. That makes one cousin that just had a baby and two who are pregnant (with second and third child respectively). Oh, and did I mention my cousin who is due in November? Seriously, I'd just like to tell hubby's super-fertile family that in the interests of getting it over with all at once, I'll be bending over and letting them take turns kicking me in the a$$ until they've all collectively decided I've had enough. My family can join in as well if they feel the need.

Actually, I didn't really mean that, and know that my reaction is perfectly normal for anyone who is dealing with IF issues, but it just gets so damn hard hearing about yet another cousin when we are still dealing with our own issues. It was kind of amusing how I found out. DH has apparently known about this for a month or two but didn't want to say anything. Neither did my in laws. At least they finally get it that they need to be more sensitive to my feelings but I had to laugh and asked my husband if he was planning on telling me when I got the birth announcement in the mail!

The thing that is keeping me grounded in all of this is knowing that our IVF workup is totally complete and that our cycle will be underway in the next month or two, once the protocol is decided by the IVF committee. That we will actually be doing something and if it works, we will be pregnant too. I've found that now that the workup is done, I feel a certain sense of calm has come over me (people have actually commented on it). I just didn't realize how stressful all the testing has been until it was completed. I'll also be starting one of the Resolve support groups next week and feel good that I'll actually be in a group with other women where we can talk face to face, even though you all as my on line support group have been terrific. I'd never have been able to keep my sanity for this long without you!

Gotta run, but will be back with shoutouts tommorrow (work permitting). Sidsou keeping my fingers crossed for you, keep us posted!

[Suzlywoozly]

Hey girls~
So I have been a total hermit lately and only been posting over in LJ. We did another FET and got the beta results on Sunday... it was another chemical pregnancy. I'm not sure where to turn now. The RE left a long message on my answering machine today. He said that he is out of ideas besides doing a fresh cycle with PGD or looking into getting a gestational carrier. I love the fact he is so freaking laid back about pushing me to consider a gestational carrier:mad:

I have an appt for a consult at Stanford in a few weeks. As hard as it is, I am ready to move on to a new clinic. I know that we will have to do PGD if we continue with IVF. PGD is the only test we haven't done yet (besides some extensive immune testing) and at this point, we have nothing to loose.

I hope everyone is doing great and I am reading along with you guys:)

[Cath]

Hi ladies -

Sorry I didn't come back and post after my ET. I wasn't able to get online at home and I've been rather busy at work.

Anyway, I had my ET on Saturday. We transferred two embryos, one was an 8 cell w/no fragmentation and one was a 5 cell w/no fragmentation. We had six other embryos ranging in size from 4 cell to 6 cell with anywhere from 10 percent fragmentation or up. The dr. and embryologist both recommended transferring three embryos, the two they transferred plus the 6 cell w/10 percent fragmentation. I opted against that because I just don't want to face the option of having a triplets or selective reduction. I got the call yesterday that the other six embryos didn't survive long enough to freeze.

Thank you all for the good luck wishes. I have to wait until the 18th for a beta. I'm sure I'll poas before then.

I'll be back later for shout outs. Hope everyone is doing well.

Catherine

[Bellefior]

Suz sending hugs and wishing you good luck with your transfer.

Cath fingers crossed for your beta.

Can I just say once again how much I hate my f-ing insurance and dealing with insurance issues? I already knew they didn't cover ART procedures and we prepared ourselves to pay out of pocket for that, but I had been told not once but twice that the drugs were covered under the prescription benefit plan. When my facility called to confirm the coverage (or lack of it), they were supposedly told drugs are not covered. I left them a message telling them to contact me immediately, then got on the horn with my insurance and the prescription program who confirmed again that the drugs would be covered to some extent provided they used a preferred pharmacy (which both of the ones my center uses are). They even ran a test claim and it came back as approved! Needless to say DH and I are both pi$$ed and he said what I should tell the financial coordinator is to just submit the f-ing claim for the drugs before they change their minds and tell us that's not covered as well. Why can't at least something in this whole process go smoothly for once???

[gymwidow]

Sidsou, that's great!!!! How are they all doing? Ready for your transfer?

Bellefior, ugh. I'm sorry. I just found out today that we had a third, yup third, friend have a baby this week. We got email pics and the one of the new mom holding her baby and gazing into its eyes made me cry. Stupid pictures. I'm so ready to be the one sharing good news. I'm glad you're staying strong and positive about starting your own cycle soon. Hopefully it will get here fast!

Suzly, I'm so sorry. I hope that the consult goes well and that you're able to move forward there with doctors you're more confident in. Hugs to you!

Cath, sending you lots of positive burrowing-in vibes for those two little ones. I hope your wait goes quickly and that you're back to share good news with us soon!


Well, I have some good news. Yay. My IVF coordinator called me this morning to talk about my next cycle. It seems the chick who called me last week and got me all freaked was totally WRONG about everything she told me! The lab isn't closing on 9/26; it's closing in October. 9/26 is the date after which they're not starting anyone on a new cycle. So I have until 9/23 to get AF. And since I'm already 8DPO, I'm not worried about making that cutoff! I'm expecting to have full-blown AF (am spotting now and have been for a week) by early next week and hope to start stims by the middle of the week.

Here's my new protocol:

CD2 - b/w and u/s; start stims (200 mg Gonal-F 2x per day)
CD6 or so (when I have follies nearing 14mm) - start Antagon

Then just ER and ET and progesterone. No more Lupron, since that didn't seem to work. If I start stims by Wed., then I figure I'll be having the ER probably just about the exact same time that DH is supposed to go out of town on business. Hmph. Oh, well, we'll figure that out when we get there. He's got someone ready to cover for him, and my mom is on standby to come and be with me in case he's here for the ER and has to fly out right after. We'll see what happens.

Anyway, I'm very much relieved with the knowledge that I won't have to wait another six weeks. Now I'm getting all nervous and excited again. I'm so glad it's already Thursday and that the weekend is almost here!

Side note: I found out yesterday that my RE's office is going to start charging money to attend their weekly support group. It's been free since they started it in July, but now it will be $50 per person and $90 per couple. I sent an email to the patient coordinator, head of finance, and the therapist herself expressing my extreme disappointment that they felt the need to do that and got an email back from the patient coordinator saying that she was sorry and would try to "work something out" for me so I could still attend. I doubt I will, though. It just bothers me that they would do that. It's not like we don't pay them enough as it is. I think they can throw in one hour-long group talk session a week!

[Bellefior]

Gymwidow you might want to tell the financial coordinator that for a 10 week professionally led support group through Resolve, its 25 dollars per session (plus you have to be a Resolve member, which is another 55 dollars per year) to see if at least they can make their prices comparable. 50 dollars per session seems very high to me.

PS. I've finally started a Live Journal, mostly as a place to put down my thoughts about dealing with all this but with some everyday stuff as well. It's friends only, but if anyone wants to be added, please let me know and PM me with your LJ name.

[Sidsou]

Suzly<<Hugs>> sorry about the beta...

Cath Yeah! That sounds very promising!! Fingers, toes and everything crossed for you!

Bellefior Ugh! Are they trying to make this more stressful on you?? You poor thing. Glad some of it finally got cleared up.

Gymwindow Yeah for getting started again soon. You must be getting so anxious!

I got some not so great news yesterday late afternoon...out of my 4 eggs only 2 were mature enough and even with ICSI they hadn't fertilized. We're still trying to decide what to do (if we'll even try IVF again), but I'm thinking we might call it quits at this point.

[gymwidow]

Sidsou, I am so sorry. Many hugs to you and lots of luck in trying to figure out what to do next. It's never easy, is it?

[tigerest]

Sidsou - So sorry about your news! {{HUGS}}

gymwidow - So glad you are going to make it into this next cycle! :) I bet that's a relief!! That stinks about them suddenly charging! :(

Bellefior - Insurance is a big pain. I have learned it is a constant battle claiming what is rightfully ours! It makes me wonder sometimes how many people end up paying for things that should be covered because they didn't know to put up a fight. Tell them you want things in writing. And its not a bad idea to try to get your meds now, rather than dealing with this closer to your cycle! Good luck with all that! I know its a pain, I have spent many hrs at work fighting with insurance.

Cath - Congrats on your ET! Sounds like you got some good ones in there! So sorry the others didn't make it! Disappointing I'm sure! But hopefully the one's you have will stick!!! I hear you ont he decision for 2 or 3, my Dr is really pushing for 3! But it makes me so nervous. Anyway, good luck! When is your Beta?

Suzly - I am so sorry about your chemical. And it sucks how your DR just tells you to use a surrogate like that solves everything! I am glad you are getting another opinion. Good luck!

Its been such a crazy week! I hope it slows down next week when I start my stims. I am doing much better this cycle than my last FET cycle. MY Dr changed my BC and its made a huge difference. Last time I was super irritable and cried everyday. This time really no moodiness. I do feel bloated though. Yesterday I went to put my jeans on and I had to jump into them and I was thinking boy…did I gain some weight…then I went to put my shoes on and those were way to tight too! I think thats from the dex though.

Has anyone on here used Heparin? I will be adding to this cycle as well!!!

I just had a consult with my DR to go over all my results….such a great dr. This was an extra appt I requested. We went over everything, and decided since I had a couple things on my APA and thrombophilia panels come back borderline that we would add heparin. He said to expect bad bruising. Its 2 more shots a day…YIKES… bringing me up to like 5-6 shots a day on some days. He said we are really pulling out all the stops this time! I am scared….of all the drugs/shots/and what all this is going to do to my poor body. But feel good that we are doing everything we possibly can this time! I start stims next tuesday!

[gator97]

Sidsou- I am so sorry. Take care of yourself.

tigerest- wow! That is a lot of shots! So glad you like your Dr. so much.

gymwidow- you must be relieved! So glad you got clarification on the date. . and it works in your favor!

Bellefior- how frustrating with all the insurance junk. Sorry about another pregnancy. It does get hard. I have a friend who is pg and I really haven't talked to her much since she found out. On one hand, I feel like a horrible friend. . . on the other hand, I have to do what is best for me.

Cath- congrats on your transfer! Fingers crossed for your beta.

SuzlyWoozly- so sorry about your chemical pregnancy. I think it's great that you have an appointment at a new place. It will be great to have a fresh medical opinion! Let us know how it goes.

[Sebski]

Oh Sidsou I'm so sorry... <<<hugs>>>

Suzy <<<hugs>>> to you as well. I'm very sorry for your loss... it sounds like you are taking things in stride though and might have a plan in place w/ switching clinics. Good luck with it & keep us posted on how it goes!

Cath have all crossables crossed for you!

Gymwidow very siked to read your update - happy to hear that you'll be making your lab's cutoff!!!

Bellefior I'm sebski over on LJ as well. Nice to have a private place to collect your thoughts huh? I'm gonna friend ya!

Tigerest Glad you got another sitdown w/ your doc to go over those results... always nice to have a face to face! Good luck w/ the heparin... and thanks for the talk about BCP bloat. I've been on them for 2w now and have had the most INSANE bloating... wasn't sure what it could be until now. Dur! ;)

As for me... I spoke to my nurse the other day and she told me that my last day of BCPs is this Friday, 9/8. I go in for b/w and u/s on Monday and then wait to hear if I start the microdose lupron that day or not. She wasn't giving up anymore dates until I asked her point blank what her guesstimate was on ER/ET. Of course she told me (for the millionth time) that it all depends on how well I respond, but that they estimate ER by day 14. She told me to count Monday, 9/11 as day 2. So, that would put ER around 9/23 give or take. :D I'm praying for a healthy response to the stims... and am getting extremely antsy. My sister did her 2nd go at IVF w/ yet another poor response result just last week. They had her doing the long lupron protocol and then Gonal F... she went in for the 1st u/s and she had a lead follie of 18mm... the other 3 she had were all less than 10. They reduced her lupron and kept her stimming another 3 days and the lead guy grew to almost 30mm and the other 3 stayed below 10. This same thing happened to her in the spring while doing the microdose lupron protocol. So, they converted her to IUI and she went in for back to backs yesterday and today. Pls. cross your fingers for her ladies! I know that everyone responds differently, but I can't help worry that I'll have the same result as her. *sigh*

[gymwidow]

tigerest, a big yay for better BCP! I was miserable on mine in July and am so glad I didn't have to go back on them before starting this cycle. It's great that your doc is so responsive and involved. That makes it so much easier with all the questions and info and testing and procedures involved.

gator97, hi!

Sebski, yay for the end of BCP and starting treatment! I'm so sorry that your sister's cycle didn't go better. That's good they could at least do IUIs for her instead.


Well, it looks like several of us will be cycling at the same time. True to form, my LP was incredibly short and the spotting I've had since 1DPO last week turned into AF by yesterday afternoon. I went in this morning for b/w and u/s and everything was "perfectly normal" so I'm starting stims tonight - 225mg of Gonal-F once a day. DH starts his antibiotics tonight. My next monitoring appt is Monday morning. I'm figuring ER the week of 9/18. Yay! :)

[gator97]

Finally got my protocol and CD1 is today so I'm on my way! I start BCP on Sunday but I'm only on it for about 2 weeks. Estimated ER is around October 10. I wasn't expecting such a short BCP time so figuring out work will be fun yet again.

Hope everyone is well. Have a great weekend!

[Applebee]

Hi All. I'll be back shortly with shoutouts, but wanted to post an article that someone on FF posted a while ago about donor eggs and epigenetics. Since my DH is so against DE, I'm hoping this might at least open his mind.

I just found the article. It's called EPIGENETICS. Here's the Article:

Genes must be "expressed" within an individual in order to have an effect. The same gene or genes can express in a number of different ways depending on the environment. A gene can remain "silent" or unexpressed; it can be expressed strongly; it can be epressed weakly, and so on.

There is an entire field of study called imprinting having to do with which gene you "activate." The field of epigenetics studies these phenomenon, and popular journalism is just starting to write about it. While the human genome project was still underway, we usually heard genes referred to as "the Bible" of the human being, as a kind of absolute truth concerning the fundamental nature of the individual.

That is now changing. In a donor egg pregnancy, the pregnant woman's womb is the environment. It is her genes, not the donor's that determine the expression of the donor-egg baby's genes. A donor egg baby gets her genes from the donor; she gets the "instructions" on the expression of those genes from the woman who carries her to term. The child who is born would have been a physically and no doubt emotionally different person than if carried by the donor.

[Sebski]

Hi ladies! Went in today for my b/w and u/s in order to see if I can start the Lupron today or not. I was worried all w/e because AF hadn't shown up. Wouldn't you know it, I woke up this morning and there she was in all her glory. :)

Anyhoo, u/s was fine according to my doc... just waiting on the b/w now. Unfortunately she only saw 3 follies, 2 on the left, 1 on the right and all less than 10. Only 3. I was very bummed to hear that, but that's the reason I'm doing IVF. Diminished ovarian reserve. So, I'm doing everything I can. It's just crazy because I'm feeling defeated already and I haven't even started anything yet. :o

[Bellefior]

Well the consent forms are signed, we are ready to pay our center, and we meet again with our doctor tommorrow. Our case will hopefully go to committee this week so its starting to look more and more like October will be our month. We'll know more details once the case has gone through the committee. My 10 week support group is starting this week and I'm looking forward to that (strange to say) and being with other women who are going through the same thing.

Oh, and the last bit of news. MIL called my DH up, said she wanted to help, and offered us some money to do so. DH told her we have it covered this time (since we've already made the arrangements), so to hang onto it for next round if need be, or use it to by nursery furniture. It's nice to know however, that the offer was finally made. Better late then never, right? I just wish she had done it way back when DH and I were agonizing over how we were going to pay for this. And I'll guarantee you that my FIL knows absolutely nothing about this. But at least both sets of parents have offered and the resources are there if we need to do this a second time--hopefully we won't have to.

[tigerest]

sebski - Our ER might fall around the same time! When do you start stims? Wow, so both you and your sister are going through IVF at the same time! Hopefully everything will work out with the IUI. Don't be discouraged yet! You never kow, maybe some follies might start popping up on the stims! Good luck to you!!

gymwidow - Wow, you already started! How did your U/S go? You'll be just ahead of sebski and I! Good luck!

gator - You are on your way also! :) Good luck! Hopefully you will do well on the BCP!

applebee - That is interesting! And makes sense too! I have also heard about this happening outside of the womb too. Like when babies are adopted they end up adapting to the new environment and sometimes people would never guess that the child was adopted. Isn't that weird.

bellefior - October is just around the corner! :)

Well I took my last lupron this morning. I have my baseline U/S and start stims tomorrow! So scared! There is this forum of women who go to my clinic and one of the ladies was nice enough to invite us all over for waffles yesterday. It was so fun! There were like 15 of us. One of the women talked me through the whole lovenox shot. Sounds pretty awful, but at least I know the best way to go about it and what to expect. She had 7 m/c before she did lovenox and this time she is a lot farther than she has ever gone! So I start that tomorrow with my stims. And then this Fri is the IVIG. EEK! :/

[Sebski]

bellefior Oct will be here before ya know it!

tigerest great to have a cycle buddy! ;) I'm still waiting for the callback... but, I *think* I start the lupron tonight, and will add the Gonal F beginning Weds. They estimate ER on cd14, and that would be next weekend. Yep, my sister and I are neck and neck w/ our cycling. I'm praying her IUI brings + results for her. I don't think she can handle another - month.

So, I'm feeling a bit better about only having 3 follies. I mean, it could always be worse. I could have had none right? ;) I posted on my High FSH board and someone posted back saying that the BCPs can lower the # of visible antrals. That was nice to see. This afternoon is DRAGGING! I wish my nurse would call w/ my b/w results already!!!

Edited to add, just got my cd3 b/w results. :) I'm to start the lupron tonight and add the gonal f tomorrow!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I go in for b/w and u/s on Weds to gauge progress I guess. Off to do my happy dance!

[gymwidow]

gator, yay! I say a short BCP time is a good thing. I hope it goes by fast.

Applebee, that's interesting. Thanks for sharing.

Sebski, no defeat! You still have a few in there and hopefully more will grow. This is just the beginning!!! What dose of Gonal-F are you on? We'll get to compare notes on Wednesday after our appointments! ;)

Bellefior, yay!

tigerest, update below. I'm glad that there are a few of us who will be going through everything at the same time. Somehow that's a comforting thought. That's really neat that you got to get together with women from your clinic. I'm glad you got a good "review" of the Lovenox. Everything will happen so fast now!


Monitoring this morning showed about 4-5 follies around 10mm and some smaller ones. My b/w came back fine and I'm staying on my same dose of 225mg Gonal-F, once a day, for now. I go back on Wednesday for my next appointment. In the meantime, I have acupuncture tomorrow night. I also scheduled massages for Wednesday and Friday. Those will probably be my last till after ET, so I want to get at least two in!

Saturday night we were out to dinner with friends and were going straight from there to a birthday party, so I had to give myself my shot in the bathroom of the restaurant. I felt like a little druggie, shooting up before going partying! :rolleyes:

[Sebski]

Gymwidow Thanks for the pep talk! :D I'm on 225mg of Gonal-F 2x's a day. Also taking 20ius of Microdose Lupron 2x's a day. Congrats on those follies - can't wait to hear about your results on Weds as well! :)

[Bellefior]

Just wanted to post a quick update. We had our last visit with the RE before starting athe IVF cycle, made the financial arrangements to pay for it and our chart goes to the committee for approval on Friday to determine our protocol. I was told to expect a call next week about our protocol but the doctor did say more than likely I would be placed on a long protocol. Although they can't give definite time frames, because so much depends on when AF shows, if she shows according to schedule, and if I respond to the drugs as they expect, they estimate the ER/ET will be somewhere around the first week of November.

I'm scared and excited all at the same time, but am so ready to finally get this show on the road.

Will be back with shout outs tommorrow.

Threadmistress, please update my stats to include the following: IVF cycle expected to begin mid-October, tentative ER/ET sometime around the first week in November.

[gymwidow]

Had my second check today and have good news and not-so-good news. The good news is that I have 10 nicely developing follies around 14mm and my lining is already over 7mm. My RE said he's been taking a conservative approach with my meds since my past history shows my tendency to hyperstimulate. (I've only been taking 225mg once a day instead of the typical twice a day.) He said he'd rather take it slow and get 10-12 good mature follies than get 20 or 30 less developed ones and risk me getting OHSS. Which makes sense, although of course I want moremoremore to hopefully better our chances! He said right now he would guess that my ER will be Monday, but that we'll know better after my next check on Friday.

The not-so-good news is that he got the results back from DH's last SA. You may remember that my DH's SAs came back with widely varied results. A culture showed a high level of white blood cells, which is not supposed to happen. So he met with a RU in August and gave another sample then, which was sent out for some newfangled fancyschmancy high-tech testing. The results came back a couple of days ago and they weren't great. Evidently DH's sperm have some DNA abnormalities. Fragmentation or something (I have to go google). Unfortunately, my RE couldn't tell me too much. First, he's not a RU and isn't as familiar with the male workings as with the female. Second, these are really new tests and there's not a lot of data out there on them to compare with. He said this may be why we haven't gotten pregnant so far, but it also may be nothing to be concerned about. The RU still recommends we go forward with this cycle and thinks that we still may succeed. My RE said this may just lower my chance of success from about 65% (he had rated my chances very highly based on my age and level of response to the meds) to about 50-55%. So still good. But the problem is, they won't know when they choose the sperm for ICSI whether the sperm they choose have the DNA problems. Those problems can't be seen by the regular washing and selection process. The sperm would have to be sent out for analyzing and obviously that doesn't work when you need them right away for fertilization. We may be able to tell as the embryos develop. The RE stressed that this is not terrible news and that we shouldn't lose hope. But he felt that he needed to share it with me, and of course I'm glad he did. I always feel that it's best to have as much info as we can. DH took the news okay, I think, but of course has a ton of questions. We've asked to have the RU call us to go over it better and hope to hear from him soon.

I'm having a very "Why me?" kind of morning now. It just feels like we keep getting hit with one thing after another. Treatment, new treatment, bad test results, new hope, another failed treatment, move to IVF, IVF gets postponed, start IVF again, now this. I'm trying to get all of this out now so I can get back to positive thinking but I worry that that won't happen and I don't want to spend this entire cycle thinking like it's useless and a waste of time and money and emotions. Not to mention the bloating and pain and everything else. I'm trying to keep perspective, hell, yesterday my best friend found out she'll never be able to get pregnant at all, so at the end of the day we still have hope and a chance and that's good. Gotta keep that in mind.....

[IVFIVF]

Bellefior you are updated!

[tigerest]

Bellefior - WEll you are moving right along! :) That is great that you will be getting your protocol soon!

gymwidow - I think RE's are beginning to think that 10 is the optimal amount. They are finding that the egg quality goes down with more. My RE is also trying to get only 10 out of me this time. I am also doing 225 of Gonal F. Sorry about the news about your DH's SA. Must be stressful. But try not to worry, hopefully with the ICSI they will get the good ones!


Well I managed to get through all my shots yesterday, and did most of them myself! I even got trhough the lovenox. Which felt like a bee sting and kept bleeding so I had to leave ice on it for like 40 mins. But it wasn't too terrible. Most the pain was gone within 2 minutes. I don't have another U/S until next Tuesday, when I will also be doing my IVIG. I am finding myself really feeling wiped out already. I cooked dinner last night and then couldnt move the rest of the night.

[Mooshie]

Gymwidow - my DH also had DNA fragmentation. His "number" was 55% and we were told (by the RU) that anything above 30% would make it really difficult for us to conceive. Well, lo and behold, we conceived on our first IVF cycle, which we did with ICSI. And I am now 27 weeks pregnant with a healthy active boy! And incidentally, I only had 6 eggs retrieved, they were able to ICSI 4 of them but only 2 fertilized. But those 2 grew to grade A 8-cells and then 1 took! So take heart and try to keep a positive outlook! Your odds are good since you already have so many follies!

[gymwidow]

tigerest, it does make sense in a lot of ways. It's just hard to get out of the "more is better" mindset. But it truly does only take one! Congrats on doing all those shots yourself. I hope the next u/s rolls around fast. I actually like them these days so I can check out for myself what's going on inside.

Mooshie, thank you SOOOO much for sharing that. I can't even tell you how much it helped. It's so easy to get beaten down with the bad news when it comes, and it is so good to hear that it's not insurmountable and that we can still succeed.


So, my RE and DH's RU have conferred and both are leaning towards ICSI still, but they're presenting our case to the rest of the partners and will get more input before they make a final decision. I think that if we get a good number of eggs at the ER I'm going to ask that they try to fertilize a couple the traditional way, just in case and just to see what happens. My RE is going to call me after he meets with the rest of the REs and we'll discuss.

In other news, I'm starting Menopur and Ganirelix tonight. Two powders of the Menopur and one prefilled syringe of the Ganirelix. Thankfully they're both still sub-q shots. So, three shots tonight and tomorrow night and then back again for another check on Friday.

[Sebski]

Went in today for my 1st check. I don't really know why they wanted me in today since I only started the stims yesterday. But, I live to serve. I have 4 follies all less than 10. It's better than my non-medicated check on Monday where I only had 3, but still. I'm a bit bummed. I don't think I would have felt so bad but the doc doing the monitoring kept calling them "teeny tiny". :o What does she want from me after only 1 day of stims? Anyway, I'm feeling better tonight and am supposed to go back in on Saturday.

Can I ask how many days of stims it took before you started seeing some growth? I have a diminished reserve, so we're not looking to get oodles... just a handful or so. Do you think they might grow more before Saturday? That will be 4 days of stims for me... *sigh* I feel like I'm in high school again... "why can't my follies grow like hers does". HA! :)

gymwidow sorry to read about your DH's swimmers. <<<hugs>>> to you on that diagnosis. I'd be scared out of my gourd too about it initially... but, your doctor still gives you great odds and says not to worry. So, hang in there and keep on doing the great follie job that you're doing. ;)

tigerest congrats on making it through your shots!!! :) And thanks for posting about feeling as if you're wiped out. I'm feeling the same and it's only day 2. I was thinking it was all in my mind... but, maybe it's not after all.

[gymwidow]

Sebski, it does seem early to go in after only one day on stims. After 3 days on stims I only showed about 4-5 growing follies, but by 2 days later I had another 5 and was up to 10 total. Tonight I take my 7th stims shot and I'll see tomorrow how many I have. I'm hoping for a nice baker's dozen. ;)

ETA: remember, tho, that I tend to hyperstimulate (typical of PCOSers) and am on only a half dose. So I might not be the best example since we have different diagnoses, but I hope this info helps anyway, if just to show that a lot can happen in just a few days!

[Bellefior]

No time for shout outs because our FY ends the end of the month and work is somewhat crazy, but I wanted to send good luck wishes to Gymwidow, Sebski, Tiger and anyone else I might have missed.

I also wanted to copy an entry from my LJ regarding starting the support group last night (my LJ is friends only, so you won't be able to see it, but if anyone wants to be added please let me know or PM me).

From MY LJ
Tonight was the first night of my 10 week Resolve support group. I had no clue what to expect. I've done individual therapy before when my mother was dying of cancer and after she passed away, but I've never done it with a group of people before.

What I found was a group of women who actually understood what I was going through. Women who knew what I was feeling because they've walked in my shoes. Women who got it for a change. I found out that this merry-go-round of emotions is normal and I'm not crazy, far from it. I found people who are actually willing to listen, are sympathetic, who can give me advice that I can actually use (as opposed to unhelpful advice such as "all you guys need to do is relax") and who have ideas on how to learn to cope with this roller coaster ride.

I'm sure I'll have more to say about the group as the weeks go on, but I walked out of there feeling as if a weight had been lifted off my shoulders -- or at least someone was helping me carry it. It's definitely the best money I spent on myself in a long time.

[Cath]

No time for shout outs because I have to leave for some meetings in ten minutes, but I wanted to come by and say I got two pink lines on an hpt this am!:eek: :eek:

Slightly terrified and still concerned that so much can go wrong. Beta is Monday (which will be 16 days after a 3 day transfer).

[twinkletoes]

Hi, guys. I'd like to join. :)

I've been a CC member for forever, but I created an anonymous account for chronicling my IVF journey. Please, if you figure out who I am, don't say anything (or just PM me). I have several IRL friends on CC, and DH and I are trying to keep our IVF attempt under wraps. :D

twinkletoes
Age: late 20's
TTC: 2003
Starting BCP late Sept. 2006
First IVF cycle Oct./Nov. 2006

I'm waiting on my current cycle to end so that we can start the BCP. In the meantime, I've got to get some bloodwork done, meet with the nurse to get my protocol, and meet with the nutritionist. I'm a little anxious about everything, but excited that DH and I are finally taking this step.

[tigerest]

Sebski - Hope things are going well with you. I started stims on Tuesday and I dont go in for another check until this coming Tuesday. Then I think after that things start to move pretty quickly. It does feel weird not to be checked for a week. My RE said you wouldnt see much after 4 days of stims, that is why he waits a week!

gymwidow - How are you doing? How was your U/S?

bellefior - That is great about your support group. I really wish there was a therapist led support group in my area. But I haven't found one yet.

CATH!!!!!!! Wow that is awesome!!! Imagine, getting a BFP BEFORE your BETA! Very cool!!! LOTS OF LUCK!!!!

twinkletoes - Welcome! Sorry you are having to go down this road as well, but glad you are joining us! :) Good luck!

Not much going on with me.....just sitting around and stimming....my RE doesnt have us come in until after a week of stims. But I am not feeling much yet anyway. Just super tired and the occasional headache. I tend to overstimulate also, so I am on a very low dose, low estrogen protocol.

[gymwidow]

Bellefior, that's great!

Cath, OMG OMG!!! Cautious congrats to you. I hope Monday gets here fast! I hope you're starting a great trend here in this thread. :)

twinkletoes, welcome! This group is great and such a terrific source of support.

tigerest, read on for my update.... I think that makes sense to not check right away. I mean, I guess in one way they need to see if you're responding to the meds, but still, nothing is ready after only a few days!


We're almost there! This morning's u/s showed about 10-12 follicles ranging in size from 14mm - 17mm, plus a couple of small ones that are trying to catch up. I'm staying on the same 3 meds tonight and go back tomorrow morning for what will hopefully be my last checkup. The doc says that it's very likely that I'll trigger tomorrow night and have the ER on Monday.

In happy news, my RE agreed to give me a prescription for Tylenol with codeine for after the ER. Yay drugs!

The RU that DH saw called us at home last night to go over DH's test results. He said it's not as bad as some may think. The test is more of an indicator of problems than anything else, and now that we know the results, this is the most likely explanation for why none of our previous attempts worked. He said that there are only a few studies out there about this kind of info since it's still relatively new, and most of those are done on very small samples (40-50 men) and are often designed to produce the results the scientist expects to see. He said that most studies show that fragmentation does not affect the ability of the sperm to fertilize the egg, nor will it have any impact on the health of the embryo or future babies. He thinks that we still have an excellent chance of success with IVF.

Also, DH's motility this time came back at 73%, which is his highest ever (his motility is sometimes good, sometimes not). The morphology is still borderline, though, so after discussion with our RE, who conferred with a couple of other REs about us, we're going to go forward with ICSI on all our eggs. We paid a lot for it, so we might as well get our money's worth!

[Tandis]

Eeeek, Cath! Cautious congrats to you! :D

Gymwidow - I think if you're already paying for ICSI, then yeah, it's not worth trying some "naturally." At least this way you'll know that one (or more) might not be lost due to two spermies making there way in at the same time, KWIM? Sounds like your follies are doing really well, and keeping my fingers crossed for you!

Tigerest - Good luck with your IVIG on Tuesday!

Waving Hi to everyone I missed!

[skb]

gymwidow Just dropping in.....A bit of a week with test results heh. The thing about the rollercoaster is once you go down then you know on the other side is back up. I'm glad to hear that the RU's call was encouraging news. And even better lookin' good with the follicles. Good luck with ER on Monday. I'll be back next week to check up on you! Dh and I are taking off for a few days.

And while I'm here....congratulations to Cath!!!

Between SAI and IVF these BFPs are making me feel ancy for my own!!!

Have a good weekend ladies. :)

[Mooshie]

Cautious congrats to Cath!

And, gymwidow, good news for you all around!

[gator97]

Cath- I literally clapped my hands and yipeed. DH was like, "what was that for?" Cautious congrats. I can't wait until Monday!

Bellefior- That is so wonderful that the support group was so valuable. I keep meaning to go to our monthly RESOLVE meeting but I just haven't made it yet. You've encouraged me to try harder.

Sebski- My RE has me start stims on always on a Friday and b/w monitoring on Monday, then the first follie scan is usually Wednesday. Sometimes I don't think that the drs. have any realization how much their choice of words impacts us. I wouldn't be discouraged- it was just one day.

Welcome Twinkletoes!

gymwidow- you are so close! How exciting!

[Sebski]

Not good news here....

I went in this morning for a check and, after 4 days of stims, I only have 2 follies. Both less than 10. My RE's giving me until Tuesday and she said if there's no improvement by then we're going to cancel. She wants to see 4 measurable ones by that point. And, I'm feeling as if that's so impossible. I mean, I haven't been able to grow 2 measurable ones in 4 days of stims... how the heck am I going to get 4 by Tuesday??? I always knew that poor response was possible due to the high FSH... but I never let myself think about it. I should have because now I'm feeling really crushed. :(

[tigerest]

sebski - Oh no! I am so sorry! Why don't our bodies do what we want them too! So frustrating! I will cross my fingers for you that 2 more will pop up by Tuesday! Don't lose hope yet. Rub your belly, near your ovaires, to get the cirulation going, chant to them, take a nice walk, and lets hope for a few more!!!!

gymwidow - Glad you got a better outlook from the RU! :) I think ICSIing all of them is a good idea!

[Sebski]

Tigerest - thank you. I have my Anji cd and will be listening to it pretty much round the clock over the next few days. ;) I took DS to the mall and we strolled around all afternoon. We'll be heading out in a few hours for a nice, long walk around the neighborhood.

I'm incredibly disappointed in my body... but even moreso in my doctor's callous nature. She threw around the word "cancel" so freely this morning that, even the nurse had to peer around the u/s machine to look at me and see my reaction. I wasn't prepared for that. And, she was saying that my e2 level hadn't risen w/ Weds b/w results compared to Monday's. Hello. I only started the Gonal F on Tuesday.... should it really have gone up all that much so quickly? I *know* that the 2 follies got bigger... even the doc said so when she started. So, I'm hoping my e2 went up some w/ today's b/w.

Can you guys send me some big-follie-vibes? ;)

[gator97]

Go follies. . . go, go follies. . .GROW!

Sending huge grow, follies, grow vibes to you, Sebski. Hoping your follies kick in. A lot can happen in the next few days.

Sorry your doc was so cold about it. I think it is very easy for them to forget that it is not nice to mess with a woman who is hyped up on all these hormones and riding the rollercoaster of infertility! Have fun on your walk!

[twinkletoes]

Thanks for the welcome!

I called the RE yesterday and got all of my initial appointments set up. DH is going in next week for some bloodwork and to have a sample frozen. (Do all RE's do this? My RE said that they had to use the frozen sample recently when the DH was stuck in London with all the travel craziness right when the DW was ready for egg retrieval. Crazy.)

I go in on the 27th for a whole slew of appointments. A consultation with the nurse, meeting with the financial people, a consultation with the nutritionist, and some bloodwork (testing for auto-immune problems). I'm pretty excited to get everything going. Right now, it looks like we'll probably do ER/ET right around Thanksgiving. Since our families don't know we're doing this (and we don't want them to know), we may have to be creative coming up with excuses around the holidays. :D

[gymwidow]

Tandis, thanks!

skb, thanks, you're right, and I'm looking forward to the up-part of this ride!

Mooshie, yup, yay!

gator, I know, the anticipation is crazy.

Sebski, I am so sorry. I hope that your body just needed time to respond and that it kicks into overdrive now. Hugs to you..... and lots of grow-follies-grow vibes!

twinkletoes, that's interesting that they're having your DH produce a sample to freeze. I guess it can't hurt to have it as backup!


We're on for Tuesday! Yesterday's u/s showed that I only had two follicles over 18mm and the rest were still around 17mm. So I took the same doses one more time last night and went in again today to see that I have 10 mature eggs over 20mm and a few smaller ones hanging around. I take my trigger shot tonight at 10 pm and return tomorrow for a last round of b/w and u/s pre-ER. The ER is scheduled for 10 am on Tuesday. I'm very happy about the early time! I'll post an update ASAP after we get home.


ETA - as of Monday morning, we have 19 follicles! 11 on the right and 8 on the left, most measuring mature or close to it. I got my ER instructions and we're all set! Today is the most uncomfortable I've felt - Saturday was bad after spending a couple of hours in the car, but today it's nearing painful. Too much pressure! I'm at work now, but think I'll head home early and get myself horizontal in bed!

[IVFIVF]

Welcome to twinkletoes, you have been added!

[pewee9196]

Ladies
I need some advice. One of my childhood friends has been battling infertility/IVF for quite sometime. I have recently found out I am pregant and I want to share it with her. We live across the country from eachother but she is still very important to me. I have not told her because I was not sure what would be best- a hand written note? Phone call- (we don't talk a lot) or an email? Any suggestiongs? I know she will be happy for me but I also know that she will also be upset at her own situation.

Thank you so much for your help! I am always amazed by the strength of those battling infertility!

[Bellefior]

Peewee my advice would be to tell her by phone so that you can actually have a conversation about it. I know if I just got a card or an e-mail out of the blue, I would find it upsetting, but at least with a phone call you have a chance to gauge her reaction and hopefully have a meaningful dialogue. The other ladies here might have some different ideas.

Gymwidowwishing you the best, please keep us posted!

Question for everyone out there. How do you psych yourself up to give yourself the shots. I'm sure it gets easier as time goes on. (AF is supposed to arrive this weekend and than after the BCP, we're going to move straight into the IVF cycle and injectables.

[twinkletoes]

peewee - I actually prefer an email. I've had more than one friend tell me of their pregnancy via email. I like that it allows me to digest the news before I have to respond. I never want a friend's pregnancy news to be diminished by my own insecurities due to infertility, and it would be very difficult to hide my own disappointment in myself in person or on the phone, and I would feel terrible about reacting badly.

[Cath]

Hi ladies -

I had my beta today. 730-something. I didn't catch the complete number. I was a little stunned. I go back Wednesday and Friday for repeat testing.

I have to say that a big part of me finds this hard to write, just because each and every positive beta always stung a bit, even though I was also thrilled for the person getting the good news.

Thank you, everyone, for the congrats. I will be back later tonight for shout-outs. I am just finding myself mad busy at work right now.

[gymwidow]

pewee, I guess it's whatever you feel most comfortable with. A note is good b/c she doesn't have to fake excitement if it's hard for her to muster it up at first. She can call you when she's ready. If you do call, just gauge her reaction and be prepared to cut the phone call short if you think she's having a hard time. For me, I have to say that although it isn't always easy to hear someone else's good news, for a good friend I would always be very thrilled and really excited to share their happiness.

Bellefior, thanks! I'll update when we get home tomorrow. Hmmm, how to psych yourself up..... I guess it's easiest to just do a 1-2-3-stick. Ice the area first and you'll probably not even feel it. I found the Gonal-F and Lupron syringes easiest to take. Either the Ganirelix or Menopur came with a needle that felt a little thicker, but it still wasn't bad. The other of those two also wasn't bad. After a while it's just another thing to do at night.

Cath, wow!!!!! That is so freakin' awesome. I was thinking about you today and hoping you'd be by with good news this afternoon. How many dpt are you? Does your RE think you might be pregnant with twins? Drop off some of that baby dust here - I can use it this week for my ER and ET!!!

[tigerest]

sebski - Sorry your RE was so cold about it. :( Hopefully, things turn around for you! Still rotting for your follies!! Good luck!

twinkletoes - Glad things are under way. That is interesting about freezing a sample. I think its a great idea. You never know what can happen. My RE doesnt do this though, but I thought about asking.

gymwidow - Wow 19 follies! That is great! Good luck with ER tomorrow!!!

peewee - In truth, the best way for me would be an email, that way it gives her some time to process the news. If you call start it off by asking how she is doing. Then say that you wanted to share your news but you were worried that it might upset her. I only say this because I had a friend who never once asked me how I was doing, knew I was doing IVF, and constantly sent me her good news and baby updates, without ever asking if I was doing ok. It really hurt because the good news always happened to be when I had just gotten bad news.

bellefior - The shots...hm....I am a bad person to ask. My DH did them for me my first 2 cycles because I couldn't even look at the needles. Now I do them myself no problem. It is weird at first to stick yourself, but it really doesnt hurt that much, and it usually goes away pretty quickly. Some of the needles are so tiny they go right in. Ice definitely helps because then you don't feel it. I dont ice for all my injections, but you might want to start that way, and then pretty soon you will just stick and go on with your day.

Cath - Whooohooo! Guess you will be a positive part of their frozen egg study! I am so glad it worked! :) Keep us posted!

Well tomorrow is the BIG day! I go in for my U/S bright and early to see how my follies are doing! Then I start my 6-8 hr IVIG infusion! Not looking forward to that. I hate IV's and I am pretty nervous about it all. Just be nice to have the day over with!

[gator97]

peewee- I would rather an email if it isn't someone I talk to frequently. My 3 closest girlfriends would be my only exception. I wouldn't mind hearing from them by phone, I don't think. Otherwise, you never know what day you are going to catch me on. Good friends told us by phone (luckily DH was on the phone) right after a negative (and this was before IVF) and I was so thankful I was not on the phone.

Cath- wow! What great numbers. I cannot wait to hear about Wednesday and Friday's results. Thinking positive, doubling thoughts for you! And hearing your good news makes me hopeful for the cycle we are about to start! So, keep sharing.

gymwidow- good luck tomorrow. 19 follies, woohoo!

Tigerest- good luck tomorrow. Can't wait to hear all about IVIG. Hope it goes well and is a breeze.

Bellefior- I turn the TV on.. .weird enough. Something about having Friends on in the background. I made sure DH was home for the first week I did the shots. I do them myself but I wanted him there when I mixed the meds. I won't let him watch while I do the shot but I wanted him there. Now it doesn't matter whether he is or not. The first time, I spent about 30 min. staring at the needle pointing at my stomach. But once I did it it wasn't bad. Don't be whimpy about it. If you are, it hurts worse because you aren't firm with the injection. The first time is the worst, but I promise it gets better.

[pewee9196]

Ladies
Thank you so much for your insight! It really helps me a lot!
Good Luck!

[Sebski]

I'm still in it! :D This morning's check revealed 4 measurable follies! I think they are 2 @ 12 and 2 @ 11 or 10. I'm not really sure though because after she said 2 @ 12 my mind started celebrating. ;) I asked at the end and she said that I have 4 measurable and 1 non-measurable. My nurse told me yesterday that I need 3 to get to retrieval so I'm feeling very good today. :) Waiting for e2 results, but I'm so happy not to hear the word "cancelled" this morning.

Cath - CONGRATS to you!!!!!! Please don't feel bad posting your news... its times like these, on the brink of being cancelled, that good news counts most for me. It reminds me what I'm hanging on for. :)

gymwidow - good luck to you... 19 follies - WOW! :)

Bellefior - I don't really sike myself up, I just brace myself and look away while DH does them. Initially he was doing a countdown of "1, 2, 3 and stick" but after the 1st time, I told him to nix the countdown and just stick me. :rolleyes: I'd rather not know when it's coming... the lupron is a breeze. The Gonal F, however, stings a bit and I itch afterward. It's all over with in a few seconds though.

tigerest - good luck... 6 - 8 hours? Yikes! Let us know how everything turns out!

Off to eat some breakfast!

[gymwidow]

tigerest, thanks. I hope your IVIG went quickly and smoothly today.

gator97, thanks!

Sebski, woohoo!!!!! I'm so excited for you!


Success! We got 13 eggs today and they're being ICSI'd as we speak. The procedure went fine - my favorite RE after my own did it - and the thing I was most worried about (getting the IV) was not too bad. I remember them asking me my name and stuff and then feeling the meds go in and saying something about how the doc was right about feeling it pretty quickly and the next thing I knew my recovery nurse was bringing DH in and asking me if I wanted apple or orange juice.

So I'm home, watching t.v. in bed with my cat snuggled up against my side, having just eaten the yummy lunch DH brought to me on a tray (complete with my beloved Hershey's kisses for dessert). I'll make a move to the sofa later so I can watch all the t.v. I DVR'd, and that shall be my day. I've got a little cramping, but it's not that bad and I have good drugs to take if they get any worse. I'm still planning to stay home tomorrow and will go back to work Thursday. ET will be either Friday or Sunday.

We'll get our fertilization report tomorrow and I'll let you all know how we did!

[tigerest]

Drive by post....

Guess what!!!
My cycle is cancelled! No IVF no IVIG.

We did my CD 9 U/S this morning before starting the IVIG just to make sure things were on track and there were only 2 follies there!!! Can you believe it! My Dr was stunned. I halfway suspected it, I know my body really well, and I just wasn't feeling anything going on in there.

So I am oversuppressed! Damn. I have come to the point in this journey that all I could do was laugh! Go figure.....in Feb I overstimmed, now I oversuppressed! So I stop the meds and shots...wait for AF...and start all over in October!

It was just all around bad luck today. DH and I decided to eat at one of our fav. places for lunch since we both have the whole day off....first place was closed because they were on vacation...second placed closed down....thrid placed completely new place....so we ended up at Olive Garden.

I guess the frustrating part is how my whole schedule revolved around this, I was supposed to go to FL tomorrow for work, but someone is going in my place...I changed my jury duty for this...now I have jury duty the same week I start my next cycle.

[Bellefior]

Sebski I'm sitting here doing my grow follicles grow dance. Hope everything continues on track. Fingers crossed.

Gymwidow yay for 13 follies! Here's to hoping you get a most excellent fertilization report!

Tigerest, sending hugs. I know how frustrating it is when our bodies don't do what they want them to do. And I totally hear you about schedules revolving around IVF. In fact, that's going to be one of the eventual topics in my group, how to get fun back in when it seems like your life is totally revolving around the TTC world. It was amazing how many of the women in my group mentioned the same thing.

**************

Well, I know our case went to the committee last week to determine our protocol. But I have yet to hear back from anyone. It should be some time this week. My doctor's nurse said if the protocol nurse didn't call by the time CD1 rolled around, then to just call her on CD1. I'm kind of pissed by the fact I have no freaking clue what my protocol is (though they thought it would be BCPs, Lupron, Follistim and Progesterone in Oil), especially since we are paying out of pocket. Should I be worried about this? I plan on calling on Thursday since we are going away for the weekend to attend a Christening about 60 miles from home and I have the feeling AF might make her appearance over the weekend.

[Sebski]

Tigerest - oh crap! Sending you lots of <<<hugs>>> on being cancelled. I'm so sorry! I hope you can get your schedule set the way you want it again. I'm guilty of scheduling everything around IVF too. Even though I'm told all the time that I shouldn't do that. :rolleyes: Easier said than done.

Bellefior - I'd call if I were you. Especially since you're paying out of pocket! I mean, how are you supposed to get a handle on the costs you are about to take on? Can't wait to hear your protocol!

[Bellefior]

Well I called my REs Nurse and gave them what my husband calls the WTF Call. Actually, I was real nice when I left the message and just said that we were expecting a call regarding what decision had been made concerning our protocol, hadn't heard from anyone, Day 1 might be on Sunday, and we have no clue what the plan is. I also told them that my DH was concerned that maybe there was a problem in terms of the committee deciding and approving our protocol or maybe we didn't get approval, so could someone please call us and let us know what is going on.

Update. The RE's nurse left a message on my voice mail. Yes we have gone to committee and yes there is a plan. I should be getting a call from the IVF Group regarding the protocol this week. If not, she said just to call on Day 1 and she'll arrange for the BCPs and if Day 1 is on the weekend, no big deal because there are 2-3 days of flexibility in starting the BCPs. Not knowing the protocol on Day 1 isn't going to delay anything since we'll have 2-3 weeks on the BCPs before actually starting the injectables.

[gymwidow]

tigerest, oh man, that just sucks. I am so sorry. I hope everything goes quickly now so you can start over. What will the plan be for October?

Bellefior, that is so frustrating! I'm glad you got some kind of an answer. The start date for BCP is definitely flexible - I didn't end up starting mine till CD5 and it wasn't a big deal.


My RE called yesterday afternoon while I was napping and told us that of the 13 eggs they got, they were able to "work with" 12 of them. He said he was really pleased with those numbers. Today the lab called to tell us that 8 of our 12 fertilized. I was a little disappointed (I wanted all of 'em!), but they said that anything over 50% is considered great and they were thrilled with our numbers. We're tentatively scheduled for our ET at 2:20 on Friday; I'll get a phone call before 11 am that day letting us know if we're still on or if we're getting moved to Sunday or Monday. In the meantime, they said they'll call tomorrow with an update, and I should feel free to call them if I need anything.

[Bellefior]

Gymwidow that's fantastic news! Here's hoping all goes well!

*************

You know, even though we are moving ahead with IVF and are extremely hopeful that it will work for us, I still have my days. Today was one of those days.

First, I had the day from hell at work. Then when I got home today, there were 2 things in the mailbox. One was DH's lab results from his second opinion. The lab results didn't show any major difference from the ones done at our center, but the doctor wants to meet with us to go over all of our testing and talk to us. We didn't expect an major turnaround in numbers, and we've been dealing with this for a while, but it still hit us both like a punch in the stomach. DH tossed the results in the trash, since our RE will get a copy anyway.

The other item of interest in today's mail was an invite to my cousin's baby shower in October. Talk about irony. Not sure if I'll be up to going to that. Because one of my relatives will be sure to ask the "when are you having kids and what are you waiting for" question, and I don't think someones baby shower is a place to cause a scene.

We are supposed to go to a family Christening this weekend and I thought I could handle it. Now I'm not so sure that was a good idea and wish I had just sent our regrets and a gift.

The subject of this weeks support group is supposed to be dealing with friends who have children and how to maintain the friendship, along with difficult social situations, so the timing is appropriate.

[Bellefior]

Well I finally got a call back and the protocol has been established!

*BCP for about 3 weeks

*Lupron 10 Units for about 2 1/2 to 3 weeks starting about 5 days before the BCPs end

*Follistim 300 Units and Repronex at 150 for about 8-10 days before triggering
(looking forward to this since this means at some point I will be giving myself 3 injections a day when you also include the Lupron)

*HCG Trigger

*Progesterone in Oil post-retrieval

*Estrogen Patch post retrieval (beginning I think she said 9 days after retrieval)

They threw a lot of info at me all at once since this was a phone call but I am getting all of this in writing by mail on a calendar. And they agreed whenever we were ready, just to call before we start the injectibles and we will get a teaching class if we don't feel comfortable with the videos lessons. While I think I can handle it, I still want someone to show me.

I'm nervous, excited, and scared all at the same time! They say a cycle is about 6 weeks so it definitely looks like retrieval and transfer date will definitely be the first week of November!

[gymwidow]

Bellefior, thanks! I'm sorry you had a rough day yesterday. I hope getting your protocol was a little bit of an uplift. Just knowing what's going on always helped me mentally. Your protocol is basically the exact same one I started on the first time. I just didn't respond to the Lupron. The shots are really easy and you get used to 'em fast. On the days that I had to do three in a row, I literally just lined the syringes up on my dresser and went at them 1-2-3!


No update for us today. I called and the nurse said the embryology lab is very strict about not giving updates between Day1 and Day3. :( I just wanted to know how many of ours were still growing. It's so hard to not be able to plan whether or not I'll have Saturday to run errands before starting bed rest! So, since I won't know till tomorrow I've decided to take the morning off from work and do them then. I'll get everything done and ready for bed rest before 10, that way when they call, if we're on, I'm all set. And if we're getting pushed to Sunday, I'll have less to do on Saturday!

[Bellefior]

The shots are really easy and you get used to 'em fast. On the days that I had to do three in a row, I literally just lined the syringes up on my dresser and went at them 1-2-3!


Stupid question or maybe not so stupid. When you have to give the multiple shots, do you give them all in the same place, i.e, all in the stomach or all in the thigh, or do you say do one in the stomach, one in the thigh, and one in the other thigh? I know they say to rotate your injection sites daily, but what if you are giving yourself more than one shot a day?

Our prescription went to the pharmacy so please keep your fingers crossed that what they told us twice is true and the meds will be covered!

[twinkletoes]

Question - I know I can ask my nurse about this next week, but I don't want to wait. :)

What kind of bedrest does an IVF cycle require, typically? DH and I are trying to plan for this whole thing and we need to know if we're going to have to have someone come in and help while I'm on bedrest. Is it typically strict bedrest, or can you do some stuff?

[gymwidow]

Bellefior, I did them in the same place. I did all my shots in my belly and I switched from the right to the left side from day to day. I tried not to shoot up in the exact same spot twice. When I did all three, they were all done probably w/in about a 1-square-inch area.

twinkletoes, it varies from doctor to doctor. I have a good friend who's doctor put her on strict bed rest for 3 days - she could get up in the morning and go to the sofa and get up at night and go to bed, and only get up to pee in between. My doctor doesn't say any bed rest other than to "take it easy." A few of the books I've read (and I feel like I've read 100!) recommend the strict bed rest, while all of them seem to recommend at least one day, with modified bed rest after that. Personally, if I'm doing this, I want the best chance possible of success and I'm not taking any chances at all, so I'm putting myself on bed rest for 3 solid days. My family and boss fully support me and my RE told me to do what I'm most comfortable with, and I'm comfortable with this decision (actually, I told my boss that it was prescribed - he doesn't need to know I prescribed it myself!). DH has to be out of town for a few days while I'm on my bed rest, so my mom is coming to stay with me. She'll do the cooking and dog-walking and will also give me my progesterone shots. For you, ask your nurse what your doc recommends and then you can make decisions later on if you have the option.

[Bellefior]

Twinkle ditto what Gymwidow said about bedrest. I know some clinics have a hard and fast rule about bedrest. Mine really doesn't but I have heard that there have been cases where they have recommended bedrest so I'm not entirely sure what they will recommend for me. But like Gymwidow, I'm planning on staying in bed for a few days afterwards, since my insurance is not covering this and we are paying out of pocket.

Just out of curiosity, when is your estimated transfer date???

ETA: I do know that my clinic has a rule of no heavy lifting after transfer, and from what I've heard, many places also have that requirement.

[Cath]

Hi ladies -

I have had the week from hell, workwise that is. Sorry I've been dumping my news off and running.

Twinkletoes - First off, welcome to the board. This isn't an easy thing to go through, but there are some great women on this board. In answer to your question about bedrest - well, you'll want to take it easy and get plenty of rest the day of ER. I went back to work the following day, which was a little uncomfortable, but not bad. As for ET, my clinic recommends 24 hours, which is all I did.

Belle - Yay for your protocol. It sounds very similar to mine, but I was on lower doses of follistim and I took menopur instead of repronex. Be prepared for them to change doses mid-way through depending on how you respond. As for where to give the shots, I only gave them in my stomach and was usually able to find some area that didn't look like it had been tortured yet. :p Sorry you had a crappy day yesterday. I personally haven't been to any baby shower or christening in about two and a half years.

Gymwidow - That is a great fert report. Sorry they won't give you an update today, but hopefully time will fly. All crossables are crossed for you.

Tigerest - I'm sorry your cycle got cancelled. What frustrating things all around.

Sebski - I'm glad you are still in it. Fingers crossed that things continue to look good. How are things looking now?

Hi to everyone else!

Thank you, everyone, for the continued congrats and cheers. I really appreciate it. My beta yesterday came back at 1790, which is a doubling time of about 38 hours. I go back in tomorrow for my third beta. I'll try to come by and update, but we have some computer training all day tomorrow.

[Bellefior]

Cath wow those are some awesome numbers, congrats! Any chance there might be more than one in there???

[twinkletoes]

Rats on the bedrest. Either DH is going to have to take off work, or we're going to have to arrange for someone to come stay with us. Even if I only do 24 hours of bedrest, someone's going to have to be around.

And lifting heavy objects? What kinds of restrictions did you guys have for that? Was their a weight limit on what you could pick up?

I want to do everything I can for this cycle - as we're also paying out of pocket. But I have certain obligations that I can't just neglect. Rats.

[Sebski]

Quick flyby post... shouldn't be on CC - have to log back on to work to finish something.

Anyway, went in this morning for another u/s and more b/w. Day 10 of stims and I still only have 2 measurable follies! :mad: I have 1 @ 13 and 1 @ 15 and 3<11. *sigh* I don't think I'm going to meet my clinic's "3 follie" minimum by Saturday (that's when I go in for yet another check) so this morning's doc said she's going to talk to my doc about converting me to an IUI. At least things won't be cancelled right? UGH. Anyway, I'm to continue my meds and go in again on Saturday. Do you guys think there's any chance of those 3 little dudes catching up at this point? I don't even need all 3 - just 1 would do it. I'm back to being royally frustrated w/ my body. But, an IUI is better than nothing after all these shots I guess. :rolleyes:

[Bellefior]

Twinklejust want to update. I checked the packet my clinic gives me and it said no heavy lifting (no weight limit indicated) and no strenuous activity for the 2 weeks post transfer until the beta draw.

[Cath]

Drive by - today's number was 3632. I go in for an ultrasound on Wednesday.

[gymwidow]

ET is on for 1:40 today. We have two "perfect" (in my RE's words) embryos and 3 that are lagging behind a bit. The two perfect ones are going back in and the others will be left to hopefully grow and later freeze.

I'll update when I get home!

[Bellefior]

Good luck Gymwidow!

[gator97]

Cath- Wow. Great numbers, girl! That is awesome you get an ultrasound so soon. Can't wait to hear how many you have incubating in there!

gymwidow- 2 perfect embryos!! Woohoo! Hope transfer went well for you.

twinkletoes- my RE recommends 5 days of coach potato status post transfer. . .but 3 days at a minimum. Not really bedrest- just hanging out on the coach--getting up when needed. No intercourse, lifting over 10 lbs (I think), or aerobic exercise for the two weeks after.

tigerest- so sorry that your cycle got cancelled. How frustrating.

Sebski- fingers crossed that your body gets back into gear. Glad you have the option of switching to an IUI so not all will be lost.

[Sebski]

Went in for another check this morning... 3 follies @ 17, 15 and 11. A couple more @<11. I go back tomorrow for another check and to talk about converting to IUI. RE said that they do sometimes go to ER for only 2 follies, but the success rates lie pretty much the same as they would for IUI. We'll see! I'm not bummed... I'm actually relieved. I just didn't want to be cancelled altogether.

Cath - can't wait to hear how many you have in there!!!

Gymwdiow - good luck!

[Mooshie]

Hooray Cath and Gymwidow!

[Bellefior]

Practical question for you ladies, because I really want to see how you all handle this situation.

If you have to be at an event or out of the house when you have to give yourself one of your injections, how do you do it? Do you bring your meds with you and draw up in the bathroom? Fill the syringe at home and just do it in the bathroom?

I'm sure I'm not the first person with this dilemma, but I just want to see how you handle it.

Thanks!

[tigerest]

Bellefior - YAY on finally getting your protocol! Looks like we will be cycling together. My ER and ET should be around the first week of November as well. AS far as needing injections while you are out, I prefill my syringes. Someone on another thread suggested using an eyeglass case to hold the syringe. So I will prefill my syringe, place it in the eyeglass case, and then I will put it in a lunch cooler with an ice pack. IT works really well and the eyeglass case doesnt attract attention. Most of these needles are super tiny so I do most of them in my stomach. Occasionally I will do one or two in my thigh to give my stomach a break. But I have found that my thigh is more sensitive.

twinkletoes - Most RE's suggest 24 hrs of strict bedrest, only getting up to pee. Then after that the RE's vary. Some say be a couch potato for the next few days, some say its not needed. But most importantly just take it easy. I think you are not supposed to lift anything over 10 lbs.

Cath - So glad your betas are doubling nicely. Good luck with your U/S! :)

gymwidow - Hope your ET went well and that you are resting nicely with your embryos snuggled in. :)

sebski - Glad that you dont have to completely cancel! Good luck!

Thanks for the hugs. I am hanging in there. Just found out this past week that my work is not allowing me to take anymore sick or FMLA time. So they are urging me to cut down to 32 hrs a week. I was already thinking of that, but now I feel like I am being pushed into it. I am ok with 32 hrs/wk, but its going to be hard financially. Hopefully, we can manage. And it will be good for me overall.

[ladybug777]

Just dropping in to sprinkle lots of baby dust around and wish everyone luck with their upcoming ER and ET.

[Bellefior]

Tiger yay a cycle buddy! Thanks for the info on how to do injections out of the house. We have a surprise 40th birthday party for a friend coming up mid October and it look like that may be about the time I start the Lupron injections. The birthday party is the same day as a baby shower I really didn't want to go to so now I have a legit reason to send my regrets to that. And if the party is in the afternoon, works even better for us (might be because of the number of older people expected to be there)--it would be the same time as the baby shower and would enable us to get home in time to do the injections. We're trying to stick to as close as home as possible during the month we cycle.

You ever hear the saying a watched pot never boils? Same applies for getting AF. Been spotting for the last couple of days (so I know its on its way) but no full flow yet. The one time I actually want it to get here, and its taking its sweet time! I'm probably going to call the RE's office anyway to let them know what it going on but I still can't call it CD1 yet. I'm wondering if I should take an HPT before I call? I know that I can't be pregnant (nice as it would be to dream) and I hate to spend the money on one (stopped keeping them in the house about 4 months back), but I know the doctor's office will probably ask if I did.

ETA: I went out and used the self-checkout at the CVS across from work to buy 2 HPTs. Used one in the bathroom at work. Don't know why I bothered because it was a BFN. The money would have been better spent on pads or tampons that I'll probably be needing very shortly. I'm still spotting and I know AF is going to show up full force any minute, so dammit, why doesn't she just do it and get it over with! I'm tired of running to the bathroom every 1/2 hour or so to check!

[Applebee]

Hi everyone! I'm so sorry I've been MIA.

Cath - excellent numbers!!!!

Bellefoir - My nurse told me not to prefill any syringes that are mixed meds (i.e., Bravelle and Menopur can be mixed together to make one shot instead of two). Other than that, you can prefill.

Tigerest - sorry to hear about your work not letting you take more sick or FMLA time. I hope you can adjust to the reduced hours quickly.

Sebski - good luck with whichever procedure you go with!!

Gymwidow - I hope the ET went well!!


I have my final fresh cycle date (at current facility). My est. ER is 10/19 and est ET 10/22-24. I start stims 10/7 if everything is ok at my evaulation 10/4. I did get my doctor to do one immune panel (ANA). That came back normal at 30. We are still waiting on the karyotype tests. I've been continuing acupuncture. If I get a BFN this cycle I'm stopping that and going on NutriSystem - if they can determine the 6-7 foods that I can eat will allow me to lose the weight (that's about the amount that doesn't contain garlic). Oh, and we are going to buy a new plasma tv!!! If you have one, I'd love to know if you love it and the brand.

~~~Waves to everyone else I missed!!!!!

[Sebski]

Bellefoir - I've basically lived my life around my injection times for the past 2w. :rolleyes: I'm too afraid to prefill the syringe and just figure it's easier on my mind to just be home for it. Not practical by any means, but easier on my head. ;)

I start day 15 of stims tomorrow. Yep, still stimming. Went in today and have 4 measurables... they measure 19, 18, 13 and 11. My e2 is at 796. So, hopefully that means the 2 small ones are growing somewhat. Anyway, I'm to continue meds today/tomorrow morning and go back in the AM for b/w and u/s again to determine IVF or IUI. Either way, I'll be triggering tomorrow night and the procedure will be on Thursday.

The past 2 weeks have been mentally exhausting!!!

[Bellefior]

Still sitting here and still waiting for AF to show up so we can get this show on the road! Even though I stopped temping, I did check my temp this morning and its in a pre-O range, so hopefully, she will show up soon!

[Sebski]

This morning's u/s showed that all 4 follies have grown... I now have the following: 20, 20, 15 and 12. There are 2 less than 11, but they're not going to catch up in time. I'm supposed to trigger tonight, but still don't know if its for IVF or IUI. I'm praying IVF, but will take IUI. It's better than a cancellation. Am waiting for the call this afternoon after they get my e2 results... will be back to update later!

[gator97]

sebski- what a rollercoaster you have been on. . . .fingers crossed.

bellefior- the witch never arrives when you want her.

[Sebski]

I'm doing IVF! I'm doing IVF! :) I got the call this afternoon while in BRU (of all places!). I forgot to ask what my e2 was because I was just so darned excited to hear that I'm going to retrieval!!! :) :) I trigger tonight at 10pm and go in for b/w and u/s tomorrow morning. ER is set for Thurs morning at 9am. WOO HOO! I'm so giddy it's ridiculous! :D

[gator97]

woohoo, Sebski!

[twinkletoes]

Hurrah, sebski!

I have my slew of appointments tomorrow. First, a meeting with the nutritionist to make sure my diet is going to keep my glucose levels under control during the IVF cycle and any pregnancy that may follow. Then a meeting with the nurse to get my protocol. Then some bloodwork (I still need my immune panels), and finally a meeting with the financial people. It's going to be a big day!

Now if only AF would show so that I can start my BCP. :D

[Bellefior]

Good luck Sebski!

Looks like the witch finally made her appearance. I never thought the day would come when I would be glad to say that. I'll be calling the doctor's office tommorrow to find out when to start the BCPs. We're finally getting this show on the road!

(Twinkle sounds like you and I may be cycling at the same time as well!)

[tigerest]

Bellefior - YAY for AF! :) I found it is easiest to stay close to home while cycling. WE did go away for one weekend and I was sooo careful to bring my meds, that I totally forgot to bring the syringe for one of them. We found ourselves running to CVS and begging them for a syringe. They didn't want to give me one without a prescription. SO finally I whipped out my calendar and said "Look I have to take all of these everyday, and I have the medicine, I just left the syringe at home." Funny thing was they were like, you have to take all of those!!! SO I think they felt sorry for me and gave me one. What a mess.

Applebee - Whoohoo on the plasma! :) Looks like you will be just ahead of me in your cycle! Hope everything goes well at your next appt.

Sebski - YAY!!!! So glad things worked out for your IVF cycle!! Good luck on Thursday!!! :)

twinkletoes - Wow does sound like a busy day!! Hope everything goes smoothly!

Me - I swear I am going through some kind of withdrawl from the meds. I have had a headache everyday since I stopped. And today I feel all weird, nauseous, restless. I think its from going off the dexamethasone. Sucks...I feel cruddy on the meds...I feel cruddy of the meds...

[skb]

Hi Ladies. I've been a member at SAI for quite some time and recognize some of your screen names. I've been reading along and would like to join. We have our first consult for IVF in about 4 weeks. In the meantime we are repeating bloodwork and filling out paperwork requested by the fertility clinic. Given I cheer you all along I thought I should introduce myself.

me: 31
dh: 33
10/04: TTC
03/05: hormone levels, US, SA normal
11/05: HSG uterine abnormality
12/05: MRI septate uterus
01/06: septate resection
02/06: HSG normal
04/06-09/06: (6) clomid/US tracking/HCG

[Cath]

Hi ladies -

I'm kind of numb right now. I had my ultrasound this morning and initially saw two embryos. Upon closer examination, one of those embryos had decided to divide. All three had heartbeats. Oh crap, what am I going to do! I couldn't even fathom twins, much less triplets. It is still very early and things could change, but for now, that's what I know.

[gymwidow]

twinkletoes, my post-ET instructions included no lifting anything over 10 lbs, no caffeine, no alcohol, no cigarettes, no exercise, no sex. I hope all your appts go well today!

Sebski, almost there..... I'm so excited that you get to do the IVF! Good luck tomorrow!!!!

gator & Mooshie, thanks!

Bellefior, I'd draw it up and bring it with me. I had to do one injection in a restaurant bathroom this month and it was fine. Yay for AF!

tigerest, thanks. I'm sorry that you're getting forced into doing that, but I hope that it will be a good thing for you overall.

Applebee, thanks! I'm glad you're all scheduled. Yay for a new t.v. How awesome! Something fun to watch during bed rest, right? ;)

skb, welcome!

Cath, ummmm, holy crap seems to be about the only thing I can think to say. Wow! Congrats! Sending hugs to you.......


ET went great. Thanks to our connection through our friend the GYN, the senior doc of the clinic did my transfer himself, and b/c my DH insisted, the RE I usually see for monitoring was in the room as well (basically just standing around!). We put back the two best-looking embryos. One was Grade A, 8-cell, compacting. The other was Grade A-, 7 cell. The other three were lagging behind, and we found out on Monday that they didn't make it. I was really upset - out of 13 eggs we only had two viable embryos. I really wish we had put back a third on Friday while they were still doing okay, but then again, hearing Cath's news makes me think twice about that! ;) After the ET, I went home and basically spent the weekend on the sofa. On Monday I worked for a bit, but went home early. Same thing yesterday. Today's my first full day back and I have to say - I like the part-time thing! :) I'm still a little sore from the ER, mostly just achy on the inside when I'm sitting straight up in a chair. But other than that, all is good. The PIO shots aren't that bad (I think the key is really icing the area for a long time - I ice for a good 10 min, until it hurts from being so cold!). The hardest thing now is just waiting to find out. My beta is scheduled for next Tuesday.

Thanks for all the good wishes everyone. I hope we continue to bring good news and BFPs in here!

[tigerest]

skb - Welcome. Glad you are coming out of lurkdom. Best of luck with everything!!!

gymwidow - Hang in there, you're almost there! Hooray for the good embryos! Hope they are settling in for the long term! Good luck!!1

Cath - OMG!!!! Big {{HUGS} to you!!! COngrats on the heartbeats! I am like you in the sense I would like just one, and my RE has been pushing putting back 3 but I have been scared. Hopefully everything will work out. Your cycle has had some interesting twists, but so far things seem to work out. Good luck and take care of yourself.

[twinkletoes]

Cath - Holy cow! I just told DH and he got this wide-eyed look of terror on his face. I think I'll stop talking to him about this thread. :D Congrats!

gymwidow - I'm glad your transfer went well. Hurrah for two good ones!


I had my appointments today. First my nutritionist put me on pills to control my blood sugar, some pills to support my immune system, and some nasty shake thing to detox for the next two weeks. Some of it seems a little "out there" to me - but whatever. I'm willing to do whatever I'm asked to make this happen. I also got the last of my bloodwork done - chromosome analysis, auto-immune panels, and some vitamin/mineral analysis thing. I didn't ask a lot of questions at that point. :)

And I got my protocol. I'll start BCP hopefully next week, if AF will ever show (starting 5 days of Prometrium today to jump-start it). We'll add Lupron around 10/27, the Gonal F around 11/6. Repronex right before ER. We're looking at ER around 11/15 and ET around 11/18. Then we'll do PIO.

I also talked to the nurse about bedrest, and I'll definitely need someone to help out, but it won't be too bad. Oh, and I asked her about the shots. DH won't be around to give me PIO in the evenings all the time because of work, but lucky me, the nurse lives less than a mile away and is willing to come over to my house and give them to me! Isn't that awesome?

[tigerest]

twinkletoes - Sounds like you got a lot done today! Do you have any idea whats in the detox shake? I'd be interested. Glad you got your schedule! That is awesome about the nurse coming over to do your PIO! :)

[Bellefior]

Just wanted to let everyone know that we had our final consult with the second RU today for the second opinion. What a difference between him and the a-hole affiliated with our center--night and day! RU # 2 definitely was in class the day they taught the lesson on bedside manner in med school. Basically, what it boils down to he thinks that the varicocele surgery might have some benefit in terms of bringing DH's numbers up. There is no 100% guarantee and it may not work but he was in favor of it. At least he wasn't as pessimistic as RU # 1.

Since we've already paid for the one IVF cycle, we're sticking with our plan. Go forward with IVF. Regardless of the outcome, DH will be having the surgery after this IVF cycle. If the IVF works, great and DH gets plenty of time (9 months) to have the surgery and recover. If it doesn't work we're hoping that we have frozen embryos to transfer while he has and recovers from surgery. If none of the above applies, then he is still having the surgery anyway, we hope his numbers come up, and hope they come up high enough for an IUI or even to get pregnant on our own. If not, then we'll revisit the idea of IVF again.

Given the fact that we are self paying, we think this plan covers all of our bases and is one we can live with and we are happy with our decision.

The RE's office called (since AF finally made her appearance) and told me to start the BCPs tonight and I will be getting my protocol calendar from them in the mail, outlining the timing of all my meds. I can't believe it all has to be put down onto a calendar!!! I also got a call from the pharmacy and we discussed delivery of the meds. I asked them to please run it through my insurance before delivery to make sure it is going to get approved and there are no surprises (since my insurance doesn't cover the procedure itself but I've been told the meds are covered). The laundry list of meds makes it sound like I'm opening my own pharmacy! In addition to the PIO, Repronex, Lupron, Follistim, Novarelle Trigger and Vivelle Patches (estrogen), there's also Doxycycline, Medrol, Valium and Cefoxitine. Holy crap!

*********************************

No time for shout outs, but wanted to say Cath, my jaw almost fell on the floor when I read your post! While I'll agree that its overwhelming, what a wonderful blessing as well. One of my co-workers has triplets (all now HS age) and while it was hectic at times when they were young, he keeps saying what a joy they are and he wouldn't change a thing.