Getting them to STAY asleep?

[kat]

My twins have very little problem *falling* asleep (and they do it on their own, not during feedings). But almost like clockwork, they wake up at the 20 minute-to-half-hour mark and every one thereafter. Given the predictable timing, it's almost as if there's a malfunction in their sleep patterns or something (like they have trouble with the switch from REM sleep or something).

ANYWAY, I have a bunch of sleep books but zero time to read them (due to their crappy sleep habits, I have the twins on alternate schedules, which means there's always one baby to take care of). Is there any advice for getting babies to STAY asleep once they fall asleep? So far, the only way I've been able to get them to fall back asleep after they wake is to offer a pacifier, but I'm looking for other ideas (b/c the pacifier method doesn't always work and b/c I'd eventually like to wean them from the pacifiers anyway).

TIA!

Edit to add: they're not waking from hunger or gas or any other "typical" baby issue.

[HGMorgann]

Have you tried white noise? It worked wonders for us - we used a fan and saw improvement immediately.

Good luck. Sleep is such a tough issue! I dont have much advice, but much sympathy;-)

[neenbean]

How "awake" are they when they wake? Is it just fussing or the serious, mama-come-get-me-screaming? With DD, she sometimes cries in her sleep and it has been real difficult to differentiate the two.

She is 14 months now, but we have dealt with this awhile. If it is just the fussing, we let her CIO. However, with the latter, I tend to let her cry a bit, then go in, hold her a few minutes, not say a word and then put her back in the crib. This worked for awhile (only happened occasionally) until she expected momma every time she cried out. Eventually, I think I let her CIO (she was at least 6 months) if I knew she was not hungry, didn't need a change, etc.

When are you planning to wean the pacifier? That was a god-send for us with sleeping issues, but weaned DD at 12 months and after a couple nights, she didn't seem to miss it.

Sorry I can't be much help, but seeing if there is a difference in the waking helps. Good luck!!!

[e&d]

My son went through the same thing at your twins' age. It seemed like everything I read said they'd sleep for an hour, blah blah blah...not my guy.

I went nuts with it for a while, trying to get him to stay asleep. All my efforts were pretty much worthless and I just stressed a lot unnecessarily. Eventually he grew out of it and now is getting to the point where he'll nap an hour and a half at a time.

We are just now starting to do what neenbean talked about with trying to figure out if he really needs intervention/attention...but at the age of your babies, they do need you when they wake. And they'll basically wake whenever, and I don't know that you can do a lot about it!

I think it must be a developmental thing for some babies or something. Hope yours work through it soon! :)

[bamboo]

It's not a malfunction, it's really common for babies to wake up when they enter the light sleep phase. They're not supposed to sleep deeply the way an adult does. We had good luck with white noise as well (fan, humidifer, etc). I generally either rocked, bounced, or nursed DD to sleep, and I would continue to hold her for a good 30-40 minutes after she first fell asleep to make sure she was deeply asleep before laying her down in our bed.

[emschwar]

I don't know if this would help, but I read in one of our sleep books (I don't know which one, this was a long time ago) that to get them to sleep longer, wait outside their room a few minutes before they usually wake up. Then, when they're just starting to stir, sneak in and soothe them back down before they wake all the way up. Eventually (so they say) they won't need the soothing, and they'll start sleeping longer on their own. I don't know if it works or not, since every time I tried sitting outside Noah's room waiting for him to wake up, he'd take monster naps and sleep for well over an hour!

[Marisa]

We had some luck with the technique Emily describes, it was lucky for me that our office is directly next to our bedroom, where Joey was sleeping. Of course, I'd sit on the computer throughout a whole nap, because I "needed" to be right there in case Joey woke up! :D

Other than that, is this a habit that they've recently gotten into (maybe tied to a growth spurt)? If you have a favorite carrier or sling, will one of them sleep on you while you tend to the other?

[pullbuoy]

The sleep books that I like would tell you to put them down earlier, that they might be waking up partly because they were overtired when they went down, so the antifatigue hormones they had going in their bodies when they went down are having trouble settling down (like when you are wired if you stay up all night working). YMMV, of course- I have two kids, and my daughter was definitely like this, if she was off schedule and tired her sleep was much more fitful, but my son doesn't seem to do that at all. It's worth a shot, though.

[Phen]

White noise, for sure. I just ordered this white noise CD (http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0001WA6Y2/ref=pd_rvi_gw_2/002-2688518-9330419?%5Fencoding=UTF8&v=glance&n=5174) for a friend with a 6-week-old, as those things worked with my guys when they were little.

good luck!

~ Phen

[hapahaole]

Have you tried swaddling? We did it early on for my son and then I thought he was outgrowing it, so we stopped...but then slowly his naps got shorter and shorter...to about a half hour. He had a pretty strong startle reflex and wasn't good at self-soothing yet, so I'm guessing that all that combined with a light sleep cycle made him wake up after too short a time. Once I started swaddling him again (used the miracle blanket and swaddleme blanket) he started sleeping longer. At 6 months I finally got rid of the pacifier and swaddling blanket (I was getting up to give him the pacifier multiple times a night...driving me crazy) and went through the Ferber method... then he started sucking his fingers and soothing himself.

Anyway, looks like you've gotten a few great suggestions on this thread that you can test out. I'm sure I'll be back in another month when my 2 month old goes through the same thing. :)
Good luck!
hapa

[kat]

Thanks for all the suggestions/commiserations!! Forgot to mention that we already have a white noise CD (which does indeed rock, but sometimes DS hates it) and we frequently swaddle (tho sometimes it helps them, sometimes it makes it harder for them to get comfy). Right now DD is sleeping soundly (THANK GOD) and DS is whining in his "sleep." I wish I could hold them both until they're both deeply asleep, but unfortunately I can't because I can't hold both of them at the same time (or hold one while slinging the other).
:(

I hope many of you are right and it's just a phase, because this is really killing me, with two of them having sleep issues at the same time. Thanks again!

[bamboo]

Kat- have you tried wearing one on your back? There are a variety of baby carriers besides slings (check out www.thebabywearer.com for a ton of info), and many women wear their babies on ther backs from very early on. It would be a useful skill to have with two, and certainly as they get bigger. There are women on there who wear their twins simultaneously even- lots of ideas!

The No Cry Sleep Solution is the book that advocates that sneaking in before they wake idea, we had some success with her methods.