TTC after a loss.....if at first you dont succeed try try again!!

[GlamaGal]

Can I join in on the pity party? I'm spotting today. BFN this a.m. I'm thinking AF will be here full force by the morn. I'm very b!tchy, tired and hungry. Der, if those aren't all PMS?

[hiphopgirl]

GlamaGal - Sorry about the BFN, but it sounds like it's still early. I hope you are wrong about AF.

APhiJill - I don't remember how old you are, but I'm in the 35+ category. I swear my uterus is ticking like a time bomb more than a clock. Hugs right back at ya.

It's at this point every cycle where I start to feel like I'm never going to get to have another baby. I feel so selfish wanting another when I already have one, but darn it I'm one of the few people who love the baby stage and I really want another baby. Anders woke me up at 5:00 am this morning and I cuddled him in my arms while we sat in the glider. It just reminded me how much I loved the quiet time with him while I nursed him in the wee hours of the morning when he was a baby. Darn it if it didn't make my uterus ache.

[GlamaGal]

It's at this point every cycle where I start to feel like I'm never going to get to have another baby. I feel so selfish wanting another when I already have one, but darn it I'm one of the few people who love the baby stage and I really want another baby. Anders woke me up at 5:00 am this morning and I cuddled him in my arms while we sat in the glider. It just reminded me how much I loved the quiet time with him while I nursed him in the wee hours of the morning when he was a baby. Darn it if it didn't make my uterus ache.

I feel that same way. Sometimes if she's sick I look forward to her waking up and wanting to just be held/rocked. Of course, I don't want her to be sick, but when they get to be toddlers there are few times you can just hold them and admire their features like when they were babies.

No AF yet. Mild cramps. I'm getting anxiety. I keep checking to make sure nothing's *there*. I'm probably getting my hopes up too high.

[WonderWoman]

WonderWoman
Me: Carm, 30
DH: DH, 29
Married since: 6/17/06
TTC since: April 2007
Known issues/test results: M/C 11/17/07

It didn't occur to me to move over here from the m/c support thread. Hi to all of you that I know from the other thread.

I'm currently in the 2WW (11dpo). I took a test after work today and saw the faintest 2nd line...now I'm just antsy about it. AF due Sat.

[cr8zyforaf]

Eric's wife and Alana - congratulations.

hiphop - I am sorry.

glamagal - I still have my fingers crossed for you...it could still be too early to really know.

wonderwoman - I am sending sticky thoughts your way!!

[hiphopgirl]

WonderWoman - Congratulations! I'm sending sticky vibes to you. It is a good sign to get a positive on 11DPO, especially since it was in the evening.

GlamaGal - I saw your post in the charting thread. I'm sorry. It's probably for the best since this gives you one more cycle to make sure your body is really ready.

Me - I'm not out yet. In fact, I am starting to actually let myself think that I may be pregnant this cycle. When I overlay this month's chart with last month's chart my temps are higher. They are still not where I would like them to be, but they haven't taken a nose dive yet. Also, I am not cramping yet. By this time last month I was cramping pretty badly and I was sure that AF was on her way.

FPSs include: extreme tiredness and a funky feeling in my stomach. It's kind of like a mix between a pit and indigestion. This feeling could stem from the herbs that I got from the acupuncturist or it could be real symptoms. I am getting super nervous about getting my hopes up, but I can't help it.

[cr8zyforaf]

hiphop - I am praying with everything I have in me that this is it for you!!!! How many DPO are you????

[GlamaGal]

GlamaGal
Me: Lori, 31
DH: K, 43
Married since: 10.11.03
Off BCP since: 3/2006
TTC since: 2/2008
Charting since: 5/2007
Known issues/test results: m/c 6.4.07, angel DD 12.4.07 (19w 1d)
FF (http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/1b4adc)

ww- congrats. Do you think now you are pg? I got the feeling you didn't think that last night because it was faint. ;)

HipHop- all signs sound good. I hope they're all correct!!

me- I still feel very odd about this cycle. I guess you could say I'm not 100% sure I'm not pregnant. When I bled with A, my dr. said that it could not be implantation bleeding (I guess because of the duration) and that I was just "one of those women who bleeds during pg". I too am hungry and queazy which could be because of this sore throat. But I am hanging it up on the testing front. I'm done, unless this flow stops. I just don't get how I can have a normal period last cycle 28 days after me D&E, then three days of spotting changes into a light/medium flow. Since it changed to bright red very early this a.m., that's when I said, ok, it's AF. But I can't remember what color it was with A.

[Jill1228]

APhiJill - I don't remember how old you are, but I'm in the 35+ category. I swear my uterus is ticking like a time bomb more than a clock. Hugs right back at ya.

Yup I am over 35 (by quite a few years) and my clock is fixin' to explode. I KNOW time ain't on my side

[WonderWoman]

Thanks ladies.

Glama - I'm not really sure - faint could be anything. I've convinced myself it's some sort of evap line. I got the same very faint line this morning. So ... back to waiting. And last time I had every typical symptom in the book, right now I'm tired but that could be the extra hours at work. Who knows.

[hiphopgirl]

cr8zyforaf - Thanks. Today I am 11DPO. Still early.

Glamagal - I'll still keep my fingers crossed.

WonderWoman - I thought a line was a line. Are you going to test again? No symptoms doesn't mean anything.

I figured I'd keep my TTC stuff in this thread instead of the m/c thread so as not to get confused. My temp went down this morning, but it is still above the cover line. I still feel kind of queasy, but I'm not sure it means anything. I don't have really any strong symptoms. I feel like if my temps stay above the cover line tomorrow and Sunday then I'll test on Sunday.

DH is being really cute about all of this. He is almost as excited about all of this as I am. He remembers to ask me every morning what my temps are and he looks at my chart. He has never been like this with the other ones. I'm glad that he is obsessing with me. It's fun to have someone to talk to about this. I always felt like I was in it alone before. If nothing else, this has been a good bonding exercise :)

[WonderWoman]

HipHop AF is due tomorrow. I figured I might as well just wait it out to be positive. The uncertainty and hope is worse than a negative I think. It's been crazy busy at work, so I've had some things to concentrate on.

[WonderWoman]

Yes, ladies, it turns out a line (even a very faint one) is still a line. BFP this morning with a FR HPT. Cautiously optimistic right now. And nervous. So back to waiting ... I'll call Dr. next week and see what he says.

[hiphopgirl]

ww - Cautious congratulations to you. Sending sticky vibes.

Started spotting today. Looks like it's back to the drawing board. I'm really scared that I'm never going to have another baby. This is 4 months of active trying with nothing to show for it.

[WonderWoman]

Hiphop - Thanks for the stickies! :) It took us six months the first time (and then it was the m/c). Hang in there. I know how endlessly frustrating it feels.

[GlamaGal]

Hiphop- that sucks beyond suckiness. It took us 11 mos. to conceive A, 9 mos. to conceive the m/c, and 2 for our angel DD. It's quite a rocky road at times. I know where you're coming from.

[Jill1228]

WonderWoman--sending mad sticky vibes your way

[WonderWoman]

APhiJill - THANKS!!

[danikarp]

Hi, I'm new to CC.

Danikarp
Me: Danielle/28
DH: V 29
Married since: 8/06
Off BCP since: 8/06
TTC since: 7/07
Known issues/test results: M/c at 9 weeks in 9/07
Current status: In the 2ww I'm on CD 25 of a 34 day cycle.

[GlamaGal]

Hello, Danielle!

[WonderWoman]

Welcome Danielle! Good luck!

[stacy654]

I stopped getting notifications to this thread, and haven't been to CC in quiet a few days. I am glad to see it has been busy in here!

Congrats Wonderwoman!!!

Me - I have been a bit lax this cycle, because I can't put myself through stressing, and guessing at every single temp spike/dip...

[GlamaGal]

I hate this part of the TTC stage- the time before O. It's sooooo boring. At least in the 2ww you can analyze everything six ways til Sunday. :yawn:

I had an emotional day today. I cried. DH wondered why I was upset (really? you do?). Said why. He reminded me I had him and A. Thanks. Like I didn't already know. Felt better afterwards.

[stacy654]

GlamaGal - a good cry is necessary at times. Men {rolling eyes}

[hiphopgirl]

GlamaGal - I hear you. I hate this part of the cycle. I think I'm a couple of days away from O so it's almost time to start obsessing.

In the absence of obsessing about the 2WW I've found a new past time. I just finished reading "The Infertility Cure". I think you all should read it. Some of it is pretty thick, but a lot of it is stuff you can think about and do on your own.

The book talks about three areas where you can change to improve your odds of conceiving: diet/lifestyle, acupuncture, and herbs. I started doing acupuncture a couple of weeks ago. My acupuncturist also gives me herbs so I've been taking herbs for a couple of weeks too. The last area I had to hit was diet & lifestyle.

Since I can be a bit OCD I've gone completely overboard. I've cut out caffeine, artificial sweeteners, sugar/refined carbohydrates (I am putting honey in my decaf coffee, bleh), almost all alcohol (I'm allowing myself one glass of red wine a week), I'm getting 7-8 hours of sleep a night, and I'm taking about 23973458 different supplements every day. I'm about 2 steps away from only wearing clothes made from hemp and changing my name to Sunshine.

I just went to Whole Foods yesterday and spent almost $100 on organic vegetables and supplements. The book recommends different kinds of food based on your problem. I think I have Luteal Phase Defect (or Liver Qi Stagnation, Kidney Yang deficiency, and Spleen Qi deficiency as the book calls it) so I've had to get particular foods to solve those problems. I also can't eat spicy foods or drink really cold drinks (i.e. no ice water). So bizarre.

All I know is that I am going to go full in. The worst that can happen is that I get really bad sugar and caffeine withdrawals :) So who wants to join me? Come on, you know you want to...

[WonderWoman]

I'm about 2 steps away from only wearing clothes made from hemp and changing my name to Sunshine.

ROFL!!!

I know how you feel. I feel like I need something to focus my energy on. I attacked the fireplace nook with paint. When all else fails...decorate!

Hope all your work and herbs work wonders for you! Fingers crossed!

[GlamaGal]

My OPK was + today (three days earlier than last cycle). I guess we're getting busy tonight, but I had already told him we'd be daily BDing yesterday. I didn't think it'd be + so soon.

Hiphop- I feel ya. If I read that book, I'm sure I'd be going full force as well. I really don't know what my "problem" is. Unlucky??

[WonderWoman]

Glama - Have fun tonight! Good luck!

[GlamaGal]

Got busy. Hoping this is my month. Feeling odd that I appear to be Oing earlier this month than last. I should have been BDing a few days ago, but as I posted in the TTC w/ Charting thread, I know from experience it only takes one time!

[hiphopgirl]

GlamaGal - Good luck, I hope this is your month. You should totally read the book. It may not be that you are unlucky, it could actually be a hormonal imbalance of some type. I didn't really think I had LPD because by LP is 11-12 days. I had no idea that the "saw tooth" pattern I was seeing in my LP was indicative of a problem. In any event, hopefully you won't need to read it because this will be your month.

ETA: - O'ing early is indicative of other problems as well. Not that this is too early. I'm just sayin (oh, who am I kidding, I'm just trying to recruit another person to my obsession ;) )

[GlamaGal]

HipHop: I think it could be in my history to O at different times, w/in a range of a few days. There have only been a few months I've actually temped and did OPKs and CM. I'm trying to trust my OB right now, who says I'm fertile. Believe me, I'm this close to jumping on your bandwagon!! I just can't handle that obsession right now. I have enough I'm obsessing over. teehee

[hiphopgirl]

GlamaGal - LOL I hear you. You'd think I'd have enough to obsess about. It's funny, though, because overall my temps are higher this month (my acupuncturist seemed worried about how low they were). It makes me wonder if all this obsessing is actually doing something. I'm trying not to get my hopes up yet since I haven't O'd yet, but it's hard not to get excited about the possibility. So have you O'd yet? We might end up being testing buddies.

[cr8zyforaf]

glamagal and hiphop - you know I am crossing everything possible for you both.

[stacy654]

Just checking in on you girls.

Hiphop - I might join in on your bandwagon soon!!! I need a new book to read so I might just try it out!

[smellycatsgirl]

CD 21 for me and I just got my second Peak on my CBEFM. I am thrilled!

Hiphopgirl - I have been reading that same book. I actually got it for Christmas.

[GlamaGal]

smellycat- second peak in the same cycle? So what does that mean? I thought I read somewhere that this could happen for some individuals.

[hiphopgirl]

Somehow I missed that there were updates.

stacy654 & smellycatsgirl - Yea, some people to hop on my bandwagon!

I sort of cheated this weekend. I mostly stayed carb/sugar/caffeine/all fun things- free. I did allow myself my weekly glass of wine (actually I had one on Sat and one on Sun :o), but I did go a bit crazy on Sunday with the carbs and sugar. I figure it's good enough to be saintly during the week and allow myself cheats on the weekend. It's not like I'm trying to lose weight. However, I did manage to lose 1 lb last week.

I O'd on Friday, but my acupuncturist kind of bummed me out. Apparently my temps are still too "spikey" for her liking. I'm guessing this won't be our month. I'm trying to stay zen about the whole experience.

She did give me a great tip since I sometimes have trouble falling asleep. You stick your legs (almost up to your knees) in really warm water for about 15 minutes. Supposedly it lets the energy drain out through your legs (yea, yea, mumbo jumbo). I've done it every night since then and it has really helped. Actually, come to think of it, my temps stayed steady on all of the days that I did it. Maybe I just need to keep doing that. Of course I didn't do it last night and I only got about 3 hours of sleep. I took my temp, but I think it should be discarded since I hadn't had 3 hours of sleep and it was taken 2.5 hours before I normally take it. Thoughts?

Sorry to ramble. I guess that's what I do when I don't sleep :)

[WonderWoman]

My wacky new age MIL says water a great way to get grounded. If you are feeling antsy or nervous or have had a particularly disturbing experience, running water can ease all that. "It grounds psychic energy" is how she puts it. So your accupuncturist might be on to something. Sorry you didn't get any sleep. It sucks to be tired and out of sorts.

[hiphopgirl]

WW - Maybe there is something to those wacky new age people. I did the water thing last night and I slept like a baby. My temp is also the same as it was on the other days I did it. My acupuncturist will be so proud that my temps form a straight horizontal line :)

[GlamaGal]

Hiphop- sounds relaxing to me! I think that there is some truth to it (esp. since it's working for you). I mean, we all know a warm bath can take some anxieties away....and if that ain't negative energy, I don't know what is.

[hiphopgirl]

The FPS's have already begun. I'm only 6 DPO. I think I'm going to make myself crazy. These next 7 days are going to be very long indeed.

[jesseybell]

hiphop - Hopefully they are real PS. I knew I was pg the second time because my stomach was doing really weird things. I hate the 2WW though - hopefully it will speed by quickly for you.

[GlamaGal]

hiphop- I'm with ya!! Last night my left bb was doing the inside nipple pull thing and I was just hopeful. Then my temp. this morning went way down, but not below the coverline, and I was like, oh.

[cr8zyforaf]

I've got my crossables crossed for you guys.

[hokiegirl]

I think I'm finally ready to join you gals in this next phase of moving on after my m/c. My HPT levels are now at 2 and never thought I'd say this, but I'm looking forward to AF so I can TTC afterwards!

CC Name: hokiegirl
Me: Bernadette, 32
DH: John, 35
Married since: 8/30/02
Off BCP since: 8/07
Other Children: none
TTC since: 11/07
Known issues/test results: M/C 1/08 (9 wks)
Current status: Waiting for AF to show up after MC

[GlamaGal]

hokie- welcome, welcome!

[stacy654]

hokie - welcome to our madness.

I was also going to say the same thing about a warm bath and the water. When I take a bath at night my temps were very constant following...

[hiphopgirl]

hokie - Welcome. I hope AF gets here quickly so you can start to enjoy the insanity.

Stacy - I'm glad to hear that there is someone else who backs me up on this and that I'm not imagining it.

Actually, I was starting to wonder if my thermometer was broken. It is kind of crazy to have the exact same temperature that many days in a row...until today. This morning it went up to 98.1 from 97.6. I know just one temperature doesn't mean anything, but combine it with the nausea and the skin break out and I'm starting to get my hopes up. Normally I would say that 7 DPO is too early for PS, but with my pregnancy last spring that was how early I felt it. I really hope I'm not setting myself up for a huge disappointment.

I go see my acupuncturist today. I read that they can tell you're pregnant earlier than a HPT can by feeling your pulse. I wonder how early. This is crazy that I am this excited about something that may not actually be true. Somebody snap me out of it.

[GlamaGal]

Don't look to me to snap you out! I'm just as deluded.:o

I took a test this morning (not FMU) and I think (no, I know) I am imagining the cross hair on the test. I mean, I can see it, but I know it's just b/c it's back there. I wish I'd have looked there before I dipped it....to see if I could see both cross hairs before they were "wet". Sigh. Now I guess I'll pick up a test today for use tomorrow or Sunday morn. I'm only 11 DPO and swore I wouldn't do this madness!!!

[jesseybell]

hiphop and glamagirl - I am hoping that your FPS and visions mean that there will be 2 BFP around here real soon!

[WonderWoman]

Glama - what is we say? A line is a line!

I've got the crossables crossed for both of you!!!!

[GlamaGal]

ww- I wish...but I took an e.p.t. digital test today and it was negative.:( Yeah, it could still be early at 11 DPO. Kickin' myself for not ordering more tests last week online. They'd be here and I wouldn't have just wasted sixteen bucks on two tests!! argh.

[GlamaGal]

Well, that faint line wasn't imagined!! This morning I got a BFP on the e.p.t. digital test. That was really neat to have a definitive "pregnant". I'm trying not to let the worries get to me. But, I am decidedly positive about this.

[WonderWoman]

Ahem...what is it we say about lines? :D

BIG HUGE GINORMOUS CONGRATS TO YOU!!!!!

[cr8zyforaf]

glama - congratulations!! I hope you have a dull, uneventful 9 months!!

[ThreeYell]

Delurking to say CONGRATULATIONS, GlamaGal!!!! I wish you a very boring 9 months followed by an awesome, awesome day in November! :D

[Jill1228]

Congrats GlamaGal! SBVs for you

[Jill1228]

It will be IuI for me. I am on 100mg Clomid CD 3-7
Have my u/s on the 24th and the IUI procedure on the 25th or 26th

[hiphopgirl]

GlamaGal - Congratulations! I am so happy for you.

APhiJill - Best of luck!

[GlamaGal]

Thanks, ladies. I'm thinking since A was born in Nov. 2005, it will be great to have another baby that month. All the clothes will be the right season/size and it holds, obviously, a lot of positive thoughts for us.

APhiJill- can't wait to hear how it goes. You'll get to know super-quick if it worked. Crossing all crossables for you.

[smellycatsgirl]

A big congratulations to you, GlamaGal!

Sitting at 7DPO and have been feeling really sluggish with lower back ache and abdominal cramping. I also started getting really nauseous the past few days and ended up vomiting last night and already again this morning. (Hence why I am up so late!) I am trying not to get my hopes up. It's so hard, though! I just pray it's not the flu going around.

[hokiegirl]

GlamaGal - Congrats!!!! That's so wonderful!

[hiphopgirl]

I'm out :( AF hasn't started yet, but my temp dipped below the coverline today. Only one more cycle left to be able to have a baby in 2008. It isn't looking good. I am really frustrated and sad. I don't know why I let myself get excited. I wonder at what point I will stop getting my hopes up during the 2ww. The roller coaster is going to kill me.

At this point I am just praying that AF stays away until Thursday. I know that is a strange thing to hope for, but since my problem is LPD I get really concerned that it's not getting any better. I'm 11 DPO today. I need at least a 12 day LP to feel like I'm tackling the problem.

If I do get AF on Thursday and if next cycle is a 26-day cycle, that month's AF will arrive on exactly the same day as my LMP for the first m/c (and the one-year anniversary of when we started trying for baby #2). That is such a depressing thought.

[cr8zyforaf]

hiphop - I am so very sorry.

smellycatsgirl - I have my fingers crossed for you!

[GlamaGal]

hiphop- well that blows. I understand the wanting a baby in 2008 thing. That was my obsession too. I hope your LPD gets better.

smelly- hope it's real symptoms of pg!

[WonderWoman]

Hiphop - AWWWWW that SUCKS! I'm so sad for you! I was hoping this would be the one. So...hoping it at least gets back on track for you.

[hokiegirl]

Didn't think I'd be so happy to get AF, so now the TTC can start soon :)

smelly - hope those are PG symptoms!

[GlamaGal]

hokie- yay! Body back to normal. Good, good.

[hiphopgirl]

hokiegirl - yea for AF and starting the TTC process. We might end up being testing buddies this month.

I've been doing a lot of internet research and what I found out is both exciting and depressing. I think I can solve all of my problems by increasing my intake of B6. I took B6 when I got pregnant with Anders so I don't know why I didn't think to do it again. I feel so stupid and sad that I may have been able to prevent my 2 m/c by just taking 100 mg of B6. I also might have increased my chances of getting pg for the last few months by doing that. Lord, just the thought of it makes me so angry at myself.

Anyway, all the research I am doing confirms the suspicion that I have LPD (already diagnosed by my acupuncturist, but I was suspect). Further research shows that B6 (in various levels, can't get a specific dosage) has been linked to successful pregnancies for women with MTHFR and/or LPD.

I was suspect about LPD because my LP has been 12 days for the last three cycles. However, other things point to B6 deficiencies. Since I tested positive for MTHFR I'm a little angry with my OB for not being more aggressive about the B6. I am taking Folbic (Folic acid, B6, and B12), but it doesn't appear that the levels of B6 in that combo are high enough.

In any event, I have decided to up my intake and see if that helps me out. I just thought I would post this information here in case there are others out there who have similar suspicions.

[GlamaGal]

Sounds like exciting news, HipHop. It seems Dr.'s are too busy ushering one out these days, rather than giving one helpful information on other ways to help their situation. Gotta be so proactive anymore, which you are.

[Jill1228]

Hiphop, i have LPD too. I hope the B-6 helps you. I was taking 200mg of B-6 and it didn't help me :(

I am heading to Toronto tomorrow and won't be back until Monday--AFTER my IuI ultrasound (yes i get off the plane in San Francisco, I head straight to the doc). If all systems are a go, I will have the IUI on Tuesday or Wed

WISH ME LUCK

[WonderWoman]

APhiJill - GOOD LUCK!

Ok, HipHop, you made alphabet soup and I'm lost...LPD? Luteal Phase D...? MTHFR? That one just looks like a dirty word :p I'm trying to follow along, but I'm so confused, help?

[Jill1228]

LPD is Luteal Phase Defect

[hiphopgirl]

APhiJill - Oh no, seriously? I'm going to call an RE today and make an appointment. Everything I read makes it sounds like LPD is the easiest infertility problem to "cure". Did your RE do an endometrial biopsy? I am 99.999% sure that my problem is insufficient lining. I'd like to hear more about your diagnosis if you feel comfortable talking about it. Good luck with your IUI. I hope it does the trick for you.

WonderWoman = LPD = luteal phase defect. Usually it is detected due to a short LP and/or recurrent m/c, but those are just symptoms of a larger problem. I've managed to get my LP up to 12 days for the last three months so I don't think the problem is that it isn't long enough. I think the problem is insufficient lining or poor quality of lining. What I think is happening with me is that the egg is getting fertilized, but when it comes time to implant it doesn't take. Last cycle I had a spike in temp on 7 DPO, I started feeling nauseous, my skin broke out... all things to indicate that I was pregnant, but then within two days I was back to normal.

MTHFR stands for methylenetetrahydrofolate reductase. Now you know why I shorten it. Basically when I got the post-m/c battery of tests I tested positive for this. It is tied to blood clotting (hence might be the problem with my uterine lining). I had been taking a baby aspirin a day for that problem, but the more reading I am doing, the more I am discovering that I can help the blood clotting by taking the B-complex vitamins (B6, B9 -aka folic acid, and B12). Soooo, it looks like there might be a relationship between MTHFR and LPD.

I think my next step is to call an RE and talk about my suspicions. I really think the problem is insufficient or poor quality of lining. I would like him to do an endometrial biopsy which can check the quality and thickness. What I don't know is how to "cure" that. I'm upping my dosage of B6 (plus taking some other vitamins to help absorption) to see if that solves it.

I'm happy to have a plan, frustrated that if it was that simple I could have solved this problem a long time ago and never suffered any m/c. I am equally concerned that this may not solve my problem, and if it doesn't I'm worried that nothing will.

Make sense?

p.s. How are you doing? Do you have a plan?

[WonderWoman]

Thanks for all the info. You are better than a book or any doc I have been to.

I'm ok, thanks for asking. Kind of ... lost. No plan yet. Just an appt. tomorrow to start hashing out a plan. I have a link to Web MD that I need to study ... but I'm just not sure what's realistic as far as testing/waiting/drugging/vitamin-ing...I just want my babies. I just want to be done with this part and be on to the babies part. I'm usually all about having as much information as possible, about making a plan, about being proactive. But I'm just feeling a little discouraged and I can't get passed that to the study/fix it part.

But I'm learning a lot from all of you...makes me feel informed. I'll pitch in some info when I get passed the weird discouraged/denial/poopoo phase.

Hiphop - Did you not have all these problems with your DC#1?

[cr8zyforaf]

ajphil - good luck on Monday - I have my fingers crossed.

hiphop- call the RE...you will feel so much better. I think you have gathered a lot of good information on your own....and have taken really good steps to fix your LPD...but the RE can help you out so much. You are constantly in my thoughts.

wonderwoman - are you going to an RE? I am sorry you are feeling poopoo...it is so hard to stay positive. I am thinking of you.

[tenofcups]

Just putting a toe in here. I read along sometimes, though don't know if I'll actually post -- I actively try not to analyze everything on a day-to-day basis, which seems to work best for *me*. But I've just had a second miscarriage in a year and am reading up on everything again.

Hiphopgirl, I have a question re this:

MTHFR stands for methylenetetrahydrofolate reductase. Now you know why I shorten it. Basically when I got the post-m/c battery of tests I tested positive for this.

I asked my doctor about testing post-miscarriage and he said there's nothing that could be tested for. It was at my appointment where I learned I was miscarrying so I didn't pursue it, but I thought there was testing -- and youir post seems to confirm that. Do you know anything more about what kind of testing they did?

[GlamaGal]

I have to vent that when I asked my OB and the perinatal genetics OB, both said this MTHFR was something that would have occurred while I was on BCP and/or during the pregnancy/birth of my DD1 (my OB mentioned I would have exhibited a clotting disorder w/ DD). But, from what I gather, hiphop had her first child with no signs/symptoms of MTHFR. Not that I wanted it, but for my angel DD MTHFR could have been a reason for her condition. He also mentioned that the testing involved being off of my folic acid supplement, so, for me, that wouldn't have been a good idea.

[WonderWoman]

Cr8zy - No RE yet, he put it out there, we decided to stay put for now. I like my doctor, he is informed and thorough. I really can't ask for more. He did order a bunch of tests that involved a ginormous blood draw. He's testing my thyroid, clotting and ... other stuff (yeah, that's a technical term) :p

[hiphopgirl]

WonderWoman - I hate to say that I know exactly how you feel because that's impossible, but I think I have a good idea. Keep in mind that I've been at this for almost a year, and I still haven't been to an RE (more on that in a bit). We all work at different speeds. To answer your question, no I didn't really have problems with my first child, or at least I didn't think I did. It took me 5 cycles to get pregnant with Anders, and to most that doesn't seem like a long time. The only thing I can say is that on the last cycle I know for sure I was taking both EPO and B6, I just can't remember how much. I actually wish I did know how much I was taking because for some reason I feel like that is the missing link. I think that this whole time I haven't been taking enough. I'm upping this month to 100mg to see if that is the magic number.

tenofcups - After my 2nd m/c I begged my OB to do some testing. She's an "infertility specialist" whatever that means. In any event, I knew she was going to be responsive so I pressed. They drew about 10-11 vials of blood and tested for everything under the sun. I don't even know what all they tested. If your OB won't do the same just go to an RE.

GlamaGal - with all due respect, that is a load of crap. I am living proof that you can have MTHFR and still have a healthy baby and yet still experience problems related to it. I found a link to another message board full of women like me who had at least one healthy pregnancy, but then went on to experience problems with subsequent pregnancies. My OB is also not willing to say it caused my m/c because of my homocysteine levels, but as I understand it, those can vary from day to day so just because they were normal when I got tested doesn't mean that they were normal when I m/c. Also, I found out that if I have a certain variation AND if DH has it then we can pass it to the fetus - hence causing it's demise. I plan on DH getting tested for it too so we can either rule that out or in. At this point DS seems like a miracle baby.

cr8zyforaf - I finally did it. I scheduled an appointment with my RE for April 8th. The reason that is significant is because if I O on CD13 like I did last time, that will be 7DPO and from what I understand, that is a good day to run a battery of tests for what I believe to be my underlying condition (poor uterine lining/low progesterone). I'm currently taking 100 mg of prometrium as of 2DPO. I don't think that's enough. The other thing I plan on doing is calling my OB and demanding that she up my dosage. At this point I don't think more could hurt.

I finally hit my breaking point. I didn't want to be diagnosed with infertility. I wanted to think that I could do this on my own, but F it. I'm sick of playing games. I'm ready for the big guns. Besides, even if I do get pg on my own this cycle (I still can't stop the stupid wishful thinking), at least this way I will be under the care of a doctor who will know what to be looking for. I love my OB, but I think I've pushed the limits of what she is able to do for me. Wish me luck. This is my very last cycle to have a baby in 2008 (unless I have a preemie).

ETA: Have I mentioned my latest crazy theory? I think I am getting pregnant every month. You will notice if you look back through this thread at about the same time every cycle I "feel pregnant" then a couple days later I don't. At first I thought it was psychosomatic, but I am now crazy enough to actually believe that the egg is getting fertilized and that it is just when it comes time for me to produce enough progesterone to get a good lining for the fetus/zygote/whatever it's called at that stage, that's when things go south. Perhaps it is just wishful thinking, but if I'm right I wonder if an RE could help me this cycle (fingers crossed).

[GlamaGal]

hiphop- Oh, I totally agree! (That is exactly why I PM'd you all those months ago about the MTHFR, b/c I had read tons of women had one live born child and then went on to have m/c, birth defects, etc. with their later pg, and that's how it got found out)!! I never read anything about blood clots, etc. Sometimes they look at you like you have 3 eyes if you tell them you read up on something yourself, even moreso if you admit it was on the internet. Ugh. If anything happens again to one of my babies, you bet your a$$ I'd be to the RE lickity split. I think it's great you're going. My OB is verrrrry laid back up til now (now she knows I ain't messing around and I THINK she understands that she will be run ragged through this pregnancy, given my 20 questions last visit!). Of course I will be setting the stage when I see her 4/10 for the 1st u/s.

[Jill1228]

Hiphopgirl-Re: Luteal phase defect. It is pretty easy to cure, from what I hear. They didn't do an endo biopsy. I noticed for the most part, when I was on Clomid, my LPs were higher. Has a doctor tried prometrium on you? It is taken vaginally after O. My RE is putting me on it after the IuI. I should have fought my OB to put me on it. I remember he had an RX written for it and changed his mind. I LOVE my OB but it took an RE to get more proactive. He is moving faster with me because of my age (yes I am over 35)

FWIW, I had those cycles where I felt PG (I even had nausea) but I dunno if it was psychosomatic or what

So I fly home tomorrow and straight to the RE--wish me luck!

[WonderWoman]

What is prometrium? What is it supposed to do?

[hiphopgirl]

GlamaGal - Glad to hear your OB is taking your concerns more seriously this time around. Hopefully you will get lots of hands on care.

APhiJill - I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you this cycle. I do have a prescription for 100mg of prometrium (oral), but I think I'm going to call my OB and ask her to up either the dosage or change me to suppositories or both.

WonderWoman - It's progesterone. For people like me who have (albeit suspected, not confirmed) LPD, a progesterone supplement may help your body maintain a pregnancy. It is very controversial because many OB's (mine included) think that low progesterone is the result of a m/c and not the reason for it. It's a chicken and egg scenario. The thing is that you will read a lot of stories of women who couldn't maintain a pregnancy until their doctors put them on progesterone. There is just no way to prove it (without these women going of off progesterone just to prove a point) so many think it is bunk. I was lucky that my OB at least dared to prescribe it, but it is a very low dose compared to what I see others on here taking.

[WonderWoman]

That makes sense. I knew about the progesterone, which my doc is gonna prescribe in suppository form...yay! ::sarcasm abounds:: But i'm not down with all the medication names yet. Although catching on quickly :)

[pocahontas]

Has a new thread been started for this (since this one is well over 1K posts)? :confused: Just curious since I was planning on joining in soon...

[hiphopgirl]

pocahontas - I don't think this thread has a TM. I would volunteer, but I am a spotty CC'er. There will be weeks when all I do is hang out here and then there are months that go by before I come back. Do you want to volunteer ;)

[pocahontas]

pocahontas - I don't think this thread has a TM. I would volunteer, but I am a spotty CC'er. There will be weeks when all I do is hang out here and then there are months that go by before I come back. Do you want to volunteer ;)

LOL...ouch! That could be a lot of work since I see the front page hasn't been touched in...oooooh, FOREVER! :rolleyes: I see people on there I know who have had their babies MONTHS ago! Actually, I know one of the girls who it says is one of the TMs. I'm going to PM her and see if she needs someone to take over (not saying that I will or anything. ;))

[Jill1228]

My IuI cycle was a bust :(
Due to some recent changes with DH's job situation, we are going to have to put TTC on hold :(

[jesseybell]

Jill - Sorry the IUI didn't work and that you have to put it on hold.

I am going to be joining this thread soon - one more cycle of avoiding until I am ready. I am getting very nervous. I think I have the book at home 'Pregnancy After a Miscarriage' or whatever it is called. I actually bought it before I got pregnant with DD because my mom had had 6 m/c so I expected to have at least one when I got pregnant the first time.

[pocahontas]

Jill - Sorry the IUI didn't work and that you have to put it on hold.

I am going to be joining this thread soon - one more cycle of avoiding until I am ready. I am getting very nervous.
I couldn't have said it any better! We are currently in the last 2 weeks (2ww) of our last avoiding cycle and I am kinda scarred of doing this all.over.again. :o

[hiphopgirl]

APhiJill - I'm so sorry that you have to put TTC on hold for now. I can't imagine how frustrating that is.

jesseybell & pocahontas I'll be so glad to have someone around to keep me company. It seems that the most active people who were on here have already gotten pregnant.

I had my CD3 exam today. I am not really sure what the point of the u/s was, but I guess the doctor learned something by looking at my uterus and my ovaries. I also got some b/w done. I don't know when to expect the results, but I imagine they will be back by my next exam which is a week from tomorrow. Hopefully that exam will be a little more informative. It all still feels kind of like a dream. I can't believe I am actually going through all of this. I should have either a 3 month old or I should be preparing for the arrival of a baby. I shouldn't be going through all of these tests to find out why I can't get pregnant. It's all a little unreal.

My direct report gave birth at the same hospital where my RE has his office. Because I'm a glutton for punishment I decided to pay her a visit. It was actually not as bad as I thought it would be. The worst part was when a couple got onto the elevator as I was leaving. I saw the woman crying uncontrollably. I didn't have to know why she was crying to know why she was crying. They got on the elevator at the OB floor. She didn't look visibly pregnant. I felt like I was looking at myself. That was hard. :(

[jesseybell]

We have decided not to see friends of ours who are due 2 days before I was until after the baby is born. I think I will be okay seeing a new baby (my neighbor had a baby 4 weeks ago and I love seeing him) but seeing her 8-9 months pregnant would be too hard for me - I am really excited to be pregnant, not ready to have a kid yet. Thankfully there is a lull at work with pregnancies. No one is that I know about. A co-worker was due around now but she had her baby 9 weeks early (he is doing okay I hear).

[cr8zyforaf]

Jill - I am sorry about your IUI.

hiphop - I am sorry. I am guessing the RE was looking for cysts. I had all the bloodwork done when I couldn't get pregnant the first time. I know how hard it is..but this puts you one step closer to getting pregnant.

jessey - seeing my SIL pregnant was HORRIBLE....but seeing the baby wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. Hang in there!

[Jill1228]

Thanks everyone. DH has a few prospects out there and hopefully one of them will come through very soon

Right now, we are not trying and not preventing. I am not even using my FM this month
Just praying something comes through very soon

[pocahontas]

We have decided not to see friends of ours who are due 2 days before I was until after the baby is born. I think I will be okay seeing a new baby (my neighbor had a baby 4 weeks ago and I love seeing him) but seeing her 8-9 months pregnant would be too hard for me - I am really excited to be pregnant, not ready to have a kid yet. Thankfully there is a lull at work with pregnancies. No one is that I know about. A co-worker was due around now but she had her baby 9 weeks early (he is doing okay I hear).
I went to the MS Walk this past weekend and afterwards a BBQ was thrown at one of our business teammates homes (we did the walk in honor of his wife who has the disease). And while there I saw a 5 month old little girl (his niece actually) and as HIPHOP said...being a "glutton for punishment" I asked the grandmother of the baby who was holding her when she was born (since my son would now be 5 months old had he survived). The dad overheard me and said November 8. GREAT! :( She's a day younger than my little boy would have been.

[ttcafterloss]

Hey gals...I am going to start a new thread within the next 24 hours or so. So I will ask a MOD to close this one. I spoke with Lauren (Polkadot) and she gave me the password and stuff. So give me a minute (but by all means...feel free to help me if you know people on the front page whose stats need updating because I see a whole slew!) So this may take awhile. LOL :rolleyes: Matter of fact...it may be more like 48-72 hours to get the new thread together. LOL :p If you don't see YOUR stats on the front page, also post those so we can get the new members straight! Thanks!

[tertia]

is there another thread somewhere that I am missing? I'd like to join the new one.

[pocahontas]

No Tertia, I am sorry, but within days of my posting that I'd be starting a new thread after Polkadot gave me the password, I came down with BRONCHITIS! :( So I am just now getting back on my feet and I hope to put together the new thread ASAP! Sorry for the delay...

[tertia]

NP, thanks for the reply. I'm glad you are feeling better.

[Scooter]

I'm closing this for the TM since the new one started already...

New Thread Here! (http://www.constantchatter.com/forum/showthread.php?t=41139)