Question - planning for the unthinkable

[EmilyBronte]

We are moving, and my dad is coming here and is taking DS back to TX with him on the 12th so that we can move and get everything set up in the new place without having to worry about DS.

My question is - we still don't have a will, and really can't afford one this month (although that will change next month it doesn't help us this month!). What CAN we do to make sure that something is in writing regarding who will take care of DS if something were to happen to us while we are apart? Can we just put something in writing and give it to my parents, or do we need to record whatever we write with the county? Also, can we just write anything or do we need to do something specific? I know that we can download free stuff from the internet, but will that really cover us if something were to happen?

We are in NC, if that makes a difference.

[Pookie]

I'm not a lawyer, so I don't know for sure. However, I've heard that if you buy a will kit from the book store and get that notarized it is legal. If there are any more specifics, maybe just sign and have it notarized? I don't know if that's much help.:)

[EmilyBronte]

Thanks, Pookie. I found something online for us to print off and sign with 3 witnesses and a notary. I think we'll do that as a just in case until we can get an attorney this spring.

[dzmattie]

I would like to do the same thing...would you mind posting or letting me know where you found that document? Thanks!:D

[EmilyBronte]

http://www.ilrg.com/forms/lastwill.html

This gives a list to choose your state from, so I assume it gives you a form legal for your state.

[Franni]

EmilyBronte I would do the will pronto. My SIL just did hers and she went to her bank and they notarized it for her. Most banks have a notary on staff.

[madmartian]

EmilyBronte,

Thanks for the link! We're going to be traveling soon and I feel very uncomfortable doing so without a will. This is a perfect short-term solution until we can talk to a lawyer.

[curlywig]

EB: Your options are somewhat limited/dictated by what state you live in. California allows "hollographic" wills (wills written yourself), but I'm not sure which other states allow this. (And, it matters in what state it was drafted, I believe....so if you drafted one in CA, then moved to TX where they don't allow holographic wills, I believe it would still be valid, so long as it was valid when/where it was drafted).

An excellent and very helpful site for info is www.nolopress.com.

[EmilyBronte]

Curlywig, thank you for the info. We are actually moving within the same state we currently live.

And my DH actually posed the quesion to his trust attorney (funny how we don't have the money for a will yet he has a trust). Anyway, she is in the DC area and we are in NC. She advised him that as long as we follow the instructions with the witnesses and notary to the letter of the law then we'd be fine. So, she said all 3 witnesses and the notary must be present when we sign and everyone has to witness everyone else signing the will. Anyone signing the will (as witnesses/notary) can't be beneficiaries, executors, or guardians named in the will. Then we keep 1 signed copy in a safe place and distribute copies to a few other people, telling them where the original is located.

She also told us the will doesn't need to be recorded with the county, but if we have a living will, it does need to be recorded with the county.

I don't know how we got this advice courtesy of the trust but we can't get a will courtesy of the trust, but maybe the advice was free! :)

[karlatta]

You may also want to check into seeing if there's anything you can/should do so that your dad can make medical decisions for your son in the case that anything were to happen to him. I don't know who you would contact about that, but I know that when our nephew comes to stay with us, his parents sign a consent that we are authorized to make medical decisions for him. It always makes me feel better that if something were to happen, I would be able to take my nephew to the doctor or hospital and we wouldn't have to wait for them to get a hold of BIL, who is several hours away.