Ladies in Waiting, Volume 2 [Archive] - Page 3

LeslieandPaul

02-23-2006, 04:42 PM

Finally answering some of the QOTD's that I missed.

Why did you marry your DH?
Because I love him and want to share the rest of my life with him.

Why do you want to have children?
Like some of the other women on here, I just know I'm supposed to be a mom.

Does anyone else have a dh that keeps pushing back the date to start TTC?
Not really, since we haven't talked about it too much.

How long will you wait after you find out you're pregnant to tell your family?
I think we'll try to wait until 12 weeks, but I don't think either of us will be able to handle that, so we'll probably tell them a few weeks after we find out, and then tell our friends later. We have friends who told us (and other friends) before they told their family, and his brother came over later that evening and we couldn't say anything; I don't want to force my friends into that situation since my sister, FBIL and Paul's cousin are in our circle of friends and I want them to hear from us.

SlvSpring

02-23-2006, 09:32 PM

Well, after joining this thread I have now graduated!! Our baby is due 10/23/06 :D
It wasn't planned (obviously, cause I am a member of this thread) but we are just thrilled!!
Thanks for allowing me to be a member!

dpangel33

02-24-2006, 06:27 AM

Congratulations SlvSpring, wishing you a happy & healthy 9 months!!

Smittenk

02-24-2006, 08:14 AM

Congratulations Slvspring!!

Sunshine

02-24-2006, 08:30 AM

Congratulations SlvSpring!!
H&H 9 months:D

honeygirl

02-24-2006, 11:34 AM

SlvSpring - Congrats on your early graduation! Happy and Heathy 9 months to you! :)

stevesbabygirl

02-24-2006, 08:18 PM

Congrats :D! Moving you to the graduates section!

DelSol

02-26-2006, 09:56 AM

Why do you want to have children?

Because I know it is meant to be for me, I've always known I wanted children. I can't picture my life without them.

Janey

02-26-2006, 10:04 AM

Congratulations, SlvSpring! I hope you have a wonderful journey to motherhood. :)

DansGirl

02-26-2006, 02:55 PM

Dittoed congrats SlvSpring!

tippy

02-26-2006, 06:29 PM

Ok, so wow, I have been gone for such a long time!! It's been a hectic couple of months over here, and things are finally starting to settle down. I know I have missed a gazillion QOTDs, but I am just going to jump in like I was never gone and answer the last couple that I missed... :)

How long will you wait after you find out you're pregnant to tell your family?
Hmmm, I think I will probably go ahead and tell them right away. I know there is always a possibility of something happening, but I think I would want their support in case the worst happened.

Does anyone else have a dh that keeps pushing back the date to start TTC?
No, DH and I are pretty much on the same page as far as TTC-ing. And that probably won't be for another 4 yrs or so now.

Why did you marry your DH?
Sometimes I ask myself that same question - lol (j/k) ;)
Well, DH and I were HS sweethearts, and got married after being together for 5 years. Of course I love him, and at that time it seemed like the next step in our relationship. But now, with our 2 yr anniversary coming up soon, I am amazed at how much more I love him today that I ever loved him before (does this make sense?). We have grown so much closer over these past 2 yrs than we ever were.

Why do you want to have children?
I really do not have an ounce of maternal instinct in my body. For the longest time, I didn't want children at all, but after a while I came around mostly because I think DH would be an awesome father, and I can't wait to see him in action.

Congrats, slvspring, I hope you have a happy healthy 9 months!!! :)

jnettie

02-26-2006, 07:29 PM

tippy, sometimes I don't think I have an ounce of maternal instinct either. I mean, I like kids, I can play games and talk to them, but I don't have an internal drive telling me I must have kids. I feel weird sometimes.

But then I think of my friend, H, who didn't have an ounce of maternal instinct, either. In fact, I used to listen to her rant about the horrors of childbirth and how she'd never do it. Then she was pregnant, and it was seriously the funniest thing I've ever seen. H once froze when we walked into a baby stuff store. But when the baby was born, she was such a natural, calm, mom. Still is. I know if H can do it, I can.

tippy

02-26-2006, 08:08 PM

eli1126

02-27-2006, 05:50 AM

Congrats slvspring! Happy And Healthy 9 months!

Maternal Instinct: I have it, but a good friend of ours was an only child with no maternal instinct at all. She never babysat, had kids around her growing up, didn't even have cousins. She is the best mom I have ever seen! Her older son has a life threatening peanut allergy and she and her DH have really been vital in policies changing at the school where her son goes and is just an amazing mom. I really think that when you have your own children you do change.

Beth

candy corn

02-27-2006, 10:58 AM

Hi! I'd love to join this thread!! Here's my info:

candy corn
Me: Diane (26)
DH: TJ (26)
Married: 10/22/05
TTC: 2011

I will be a "lady in waiting" for a very long time - DH is still in med school and we want to wait a couple of years into his residency before we start a family... I just found out one of my best friends is pregnant last night (the first of my friends!) and I'm so excited for her!! After hearing that, I knew I had to join this thread!!

thanks!!
candy corn :)

laurenc

02-27-2006, 12:57 PM

welcome to the new and h&h to the not-so-new!

so i wanted to update you all on my internship situation -- i ended up landing a spot at an internship site in charleston, south carolina, so DH and i will be moving for the 06-07 school year. i'm thrilled to have matched to an internship (not everyone does), and this particular site will really fit my training needs and career goals.

what this means for TTC: well, the internship starts somewhat later than the others i'd applied to, so it means we probably won't be TTC'ing in 2006 (i won't be able to take a maternity leave from internship as it's only a 12-month position, so i have to make sure theres' little chance of needing extended time away from work during those 12 months). it also means we'll have some chaos around doctors in the event we're lucky enough to get PG while in south carolina. we plan to move back to boston after the year-long internship is over, which will mean switching doctors in the middle of the pregnancy. i don't know how that'll work, but i suppose i'll cross that bridge when i get to it.

in any case, i'm just relieved this process is over and that the outcome was good.

candy corn

02-27-2006, 01:33 PM

hi ladies! I wanted to catch up on the last few questions, too, so here goes:

How long will you wait after you find out you're pregnant to tell your family?
I'm really paranoid about m/c, so I wanted to wait 3 months, but I'm pretty sure we'll tell family right away (DH's parents would get so mad at him if he kept that kind of info from them, but hopefully they won't run and tell everyone they know within the hour of finding out!) :rolleyes:

Does anyone else have a dh that keeps pushing back the date to start TTC?
...kind of, but only because he keeps tacking on years of school! He's in med school, and he just signed on for a 5th year fellowship, and he also wants to do an extra year of residency... I don't think we'll wait until he finishes that though!

Why did you marry your DH?
sometimes I still can't believe my good luck!! He is so amazing - he is the kind of person that I wish I could be - generous, caring, you name it - he would drop absolutely anything to help any one of his friends. Plus, he's hot :) and smart, really motivated and passionate about his career, and we have alot of the same ideals.

Why do you want to have children?
I have always felt that I was just meant to be a mother, and the knowledge that my kids will get to be (hopefully the best) parts of me and DH is so exciting - I can't wait to see who they'll be! (dorky I know!! - please tell me other people feel that way??)

DansGirl

02-27-2006, 02:44 PM

laurenc: That sounds like good news. Nice to know what's gonna happen in the future, at least what we can control, right? ;)

______

I can't stop thinking about TTC. At work (as in right now when I should be preparing for hearings tommorow, but I'm spending my time on CC :D ); at home; everywhere - can't stop thinking about it. DH & I have only really been talking about this for a few weeks now. We've tenatively set this fall Sept-Oct. 2006 to begin TTC - I'm thinking I might go crazy before then thinking about it. For the record, I'm reading 2 different pregnancy books right now. :o So that's not helping. Plus my extended family is planning a big trip to Walt Disney World next year and that might throw a wrench into everything. I know my brother and SIL would like to wait a few years until their kids are older to go, so I thought I might tell them when we're thinking about TTC, so maybe we can convince the family to go to WDW at a different time (I actually don't think most of my family will mind).

The trip is really neither here nor there, but it made me think about wanting to share with others that we're thinking about TTC. I feel like since we have a tenative date in mind, like its almost an announcement. Is that wierd? DH said he doesn't really care if we talk to other people about it. Personally, I think he thinks I'm just overthinking/overplanning everything like my usual anal self. So here's a new question of the day....

Do you talk to friends, family members about when you think you're going to TTC? Or do you just keep it between yourself and DH?

stevesbabygirl

02-27-2006, 05:17 PM

Do you talk to friends, family members about when you think you're going to TTC? Or do you just keep it between yourself and DH?
I only talk about it to one or two of my closest friends. Otherwise, it's between DH and me. If someone in the family asks, we just give a vague answer, like "when my job situation settles down" and stuff like that.

stevesbabygirl

02-27-2006, 08:27 PM

LeslieandPaul

02-27-2006, 09:43 PM

QOTD: Do you talk to friends, family members about when you think you're going to TTC? Or do you just keep it between yourself and DH?

I don't say when we're thinking about TTC, but I do talk to my mom and a couple close friends about being pregnant/having a baby, but no dates of when that might be (i also don't know, so that helps).

Smittenk

02-27-2006, 11:59 PM

QOTD: Do you talk to friends, family members about when you think you're going to TTC? Or do you just keep it between yourself and DH?

I have told a few of my close friends and one of my SILs but that is it.

artist

02-28-2006, 10:30 AM

Do you talk to friends, family members about when you think you're going to TTC? Or do you just keep it between yourself and DH?

We pretty much keep it to ourselves. Heck, even we don't know for sure anyway! But that doesn't keep nosy annoying folks from asking us. Our response used to be, "Maybe when we get a dog first". Well, we now have a dog. Now sometimes I just say, "I could not bring a baby into this world under the Bush administration." Maybe I need to just tell people we are having fertility problems?

artist

02-28-2006, 10:40 AM

What types of things will you do to promote learning in your child?

Part of my current job and training has me thinking about this. For example, I recently heard an excellent lecture on literacy and early childhood development and teaching reading to children.

Anyway, here are some of my thoughts...

-play a lot of music when I am pregnant (and have DH play music as he is a musician...or heck, I could attempt to play the guitar with a pregnant belly!) Apparently a baby CAN hear music inside the womb.

-continue playing music when the baby is born, provide a variety of music, and music that has rhyming as that helps with phoenics, etc.

-provide a lot of interesting visual stimulation

-talk talk talk talk talk to the baby

-read read read read read to the baby

-limit t.v. and computer

-do a lot of arts activities

-do a lot of hands on things

-try to teach my child how to read before even starting school

-provide social interaction with other kids (and animals, adults, etc.)

-not be afraid to just take the kid everywhere as opposed to just getting a sitter so I can do stuff

-take the child to the science museum, childrens' museum, art museums, libraries, baseball games, the park, etc.

-have my child attend little art classes, bug classes, etc. here and there

DansGirl

02-28-2006, 10:53 AM

This afternoon, DH and I went to the bank, and there was this cute pregnant girl behind me. Now, I'm watching 7th Heaven, and there are all these pregnant women on it. And a friend of mine posted her belly shot in her LJ tonight. So many cute pregnant bellies; I want one :p!

I've noticed this too! I think when your thinking about TTC - babies & pregnant women are everywhere!! Maybe its just our inner mommy-gene acting up! :D

...................

What types of things will you do to promote learning in your child?

Mostly everything you said artist - good list. Mostly I think its just important to limit tv/computer and spend time experiencing new things. Not just sports either, doing a variety of different activities. Plus, I think its helpful if parents act like they're interested in learning too (to sort of lead by example).

jeneca128

02-28-2006, 11:05 AM

artist

02-28-2006, 12:36 PM

What types of things will you do to promote learning in your child?

Many of the same things that Artist said. Varied activities, and of course music. (my DH is a musician as well, and his father started teaching him to play instruments as soon as he was old enough to hold them.)
One of the things I remember most as a young child was my father's love for learning. He was always excited about learning new things and it rubbed off on me. He read to me endlessly, took me to educational museums, rented me documentaries and science videos every week. It was his enthusiasm for knowledge and discovery that affected me the most. I credit my love of learning, and abilities to the time he spent with me. To this day I'd rather read a book or watch an educational program on the discovery channel than do just about anything else. I can only hope to do close to the same for my children.

That is so cool! I too would love our children to play musical instruments! I think it would be insane if they didn't given my DH's passion for music himself, not to mention I love music too. The only thing I suppose is that it could be easier to have our child have another teacher too. (As opposed to learning just from us.) However, if our kid took private [insert instrument] lessons, I suppose that would cost a fortune. I guess part of the reason though someone else as the teacher might be good is that the child has to be accountable to that person and not their parents. I can't picture my DH keeping a chart to keep track of how many minutes a day our son or daughter practiced their instrument!

I hope DH does things like build robots or something with our kids! My DH is kind of nerdy like that.

But oh boy, who will help our child practice throwing a baseball? Not I! I guess DH could do that, but we may have to send our kids to MY dad to learn the sports!

artist

02-28-2006, 12:41 PM

Do you secretly hope your child will be nerdy?

My last post got me thinking about that. Part of me does secretly want kind of nerdy/geeky kids! Not to the point of be so nerdy they get beat up on the playground and teased so much they need psychiatric help, but nerdy enough. I guess I'd rather be the mom of the sorta nerdy bookworm kid as opposed to the super duper cool popular wears the best jeans kid. However, I think a lot of how your kid turns out is just what their own personality is. Not that nurturing or environment doesn't play a part, but I know that generally siblings with the same parents and same environment have their OWN personalities and they are often quite different!

Sunshine

02-28-2006, 01:44 PM

Do you secretly hope your child will be nerdy?
Nerdy in the sense that my child is smart....Of Course!
Nerdy that my child comes home crying b/c people are picking on him for being nerdy....not so much:(

Smittenk

02-28-2006, 01:53 PM

What types of things will you do to promote learning in your child?

Read ALOT; Play all kinds of music; encourage them to talk and ask questions; limit TV; enroll them in dance, music and sports; TRAVEL; Play-play-play

I have really high hopes that we have curious, engaged, enthusiatic children!!

Do you secretly hope your child will be nerdy?

mmm I don't know. I would rather them just be themselves be smart and find their path. If that is being a nerd or not I am not sure. I definitely do not want them to hit their prime in high school and only care about being popular. I sa those kids at my 10 year reunion in September and they were really uninteresting.

honeygirl

02-28-2006, 02:07 PM

Do you secretly hope your child will be nerdy?

No, I want my child to be well adjusted. I'd like them to be bright, but with successful social skills. In my experience (professionally and personally) the "nerdy" kids were brilliant, introverted and often sweet, but had difficulty connecting with peers due to social skills defecits.

PookiePrincess

02-28-2006, 03:13 PM

Do you talk to friends, family members about when you think you're going to TTC? Or do you just keep it between yourself and DH?
Not so much. I mention it here and there, mostly just to my mom. My mom knows I want to have my first baby before I'm 30. She's also been told maybe we'd try in 2007, but that's all subject to change. She doesn't bother me about it and was actually very glad that we are waiting and having some us time before we decide to add a baby on top of everything else.

What types of things will you do to promote learning in your child?
OMG, don't get me started on this! I'm a teacher and it's sad to see those kids that struggle and would do so much better if only their parents would do little things like spend time with them and read to them. I have tons of things, but I think artist's list was great!

Do you secretly hope your child will be nerdy?
I don't know about nerdy. I'm hoping our kids get my smarts and my DH's outgoing personality. I'm pretty shy and was labeled a nerd in school, but everyone just thought I was super smart. I wouldn't mind my kids turning out just like me, but I feel like I missed out on some things because I was so shy. But I knew a teenager who thought she was a nerd and wanted to be popular so she became a cheerleader, tried drugs, started having sex at 14 and is now pregnant at 16. I'd much rather my kid be happy with him/herself and be a nerd than have such low self esteem, be popular, and think that's all that's important.

jenjunum

02-28-2006, 03:15 PM

Can I join your little thread? I think I was on for a brief time back on the WC, but not for very long. Here's my info:

Me: Jennifer, 25
DH: Scott, 25
engaged: September, 2002
married: July 27, 2003
TTC: 2008 or later

Here's our situation, hubby's getting his PhD and I work full-time. Thankfully we're not paying for him to go to school and he even gets a small stipend, but I'd like to work not at all or part-time once we have a baby/ies so we have to wait until he's done with school. We're hoping that will happen in about 3-years. But then everything hinges on what happens after that. Where will he get a job? In industry or in academia? So many uncertainties! If he wasn't in school, we'd probably start trying for babies in a year or so.

Promoting learning
I really want to teach my babies/todlers baby signs. I took a class in college from Linda Acredilo (who created it) and I've always been facinated with it. I think teaching children to be able to express themselves at an early age will help them learn more earlier. I think everyone else posted great ideas too.

tippy

02-28-2006, 04:18 PM

Do you talk to friends, family members about when you think you're going to TTC? Or do you just keep it between yourself and DH?
Not really. Alot of my friends ask me about my plans to have children, but I just say "No time soon" and leave it at that. DH and I pretty much just keep the TTC plans to ourselves.

What types of things will you do to promote learning in your child?
Wow! I don't think I have really given this much thought. Good question! Well, I grew up on educational programs like Sesame St. and Reading Rainbow. I was also a reader when I was younger. I really didn't play with many toys. DH and I talked briefly about this one time, and said that we would really limit the amount of tv our child watches, and restrict him/her to educational programs. And I think we'll do a lot of library time and reading.

Do you secretly hope your child will be nerdy?
Hmmm, I don't know. I was nerdy when I was younger and I got picked on. I don't want my child to be too nerdy - lol, but would like a child that is into reading. :) DH was the opposite, he had like every video game that came out. I don't think he did much reading when he was younger.

jeneca128

02-28-2006, 07:10 PM

"I hope DH does things like build robots or something with our kids! My DH is kind of nerdy like that."

I'm definitely the more nerdy of the two of us, and I LOVE LOVE LOVE all things science. (Got that from my dad) The first two things my dad made me fall in love with were astronomy and volcanoes. He sat me down to watch Carl Sagan's "Cosmos" Series when I was 5. I plan on showing it to my kids and taking them out with my telescope for some hands on fun.

Our kids will definitely learn to play instruments, I don't know if we'll do private lessons or not. I suppose it depends on the child. I think it will be hard for music not to rub off on them in this house. It's such a big part of our lives and DH has SO MUCH musical talent and equipment.

Do you secretly hope your child will be nerdy?

I hope they'll be nerdy in the sense that I was nerdy. The REALLY cool kids didn't talk to me unless it was for help in class, but in my own groups; (Marching Band, Color Guard etc.) I was one of the most popular. I was smart and not into the "Cool" things, but I was still popular among the average population.

laurenc

02-28-2006, 07:11 PM

Do you talk to friends, family members about when you think you're going to TTC? Or do you just keep it between yourself and DH?

for the most part, i keep it between DH and myself. i have a tiny handful of friends who i feel comfortable talking with about it... but for the most part, its' a topic kept on the down-low.

What types of things will you do to promote learning in your child?

i feel strongly about teaching our kids to question everything and to never accept answers for what they are. always search, always do your own research, always look for alternatives to the status quo. now, how i plan to do that, well, that needs some more thought... :)

Do you secretly hope your child will be nerdy?

oh, i KNOW our kid(s) will be nerdy!!! no question about it. :D

Goddess Tiff

02-28-2006, 07:42 PM

I'd like to subscibe! I too was a member for a short time on WC. I am finishing school and although we really want to start a family, we need to wait. :( So I am a lady in waiting! Here's my info!

Me: Tiffany, 26
DH: Ted, 28
engaged: September 23, 2000
married: September 21, 2002
TTC: very late 2007 or sometime in 2008

DelSol

03-01-2006, 06:44 AM

Welcome to all the New Ladies In Waiting!

You'll enjoy your time here and find a lot of support.

artist

03-01-2006, 08:12 AM

What types of things will you do to promote learning in your child?

i feel strongly about teaching our kids to question everything and to never accept answers for what they are. always search, always do your own research, always look for alternatives to the status quo. now, how i plan to do that, well, that needs some more thought... :)

I like that answer a lot!

artist

03-01-2006, 08:29 AM

Sorry, I feel like I am being the question hog here! But I seriously have more!

Cloth or disposable? (diapers that is)
I also just assumed disposable. It just seems way easier. I understand why people do cloth. Better on the baby's skin. Better for the planet. Cost effective in the long run. I just don't have the patience for it and I can't stand the thought of washing the poop off. I do know there are diapering services, but I bet they are expensive. That and, what does one do when they are out at the grocery store or park or someone else's house or something?

Anyway, I never really thought that issue would be an issue! However, for some reason DH brought it up last night. Mind you, we don't have children, we aren't TTC, and I don't think we will for some time. So, it kind of threw me off guard that not only did DH bring this up, but he brought up diapers of all things.

Basically what he declared (yes, declared) was, "Our kids will wear cloth diapers! If our kids are not in daycare, and they won't be, they will wear cloth diapers. If you are the SAHM, we can get a diapering service I guess, but if it's me, I'll clean it myself." Um, okay. When did I agree to that? And when did he get so opinionated on that? Yeah, we'll see about that one! Bedsides, I'd give it a week before he'd cave in and buy disposables.

For those of you doing the SAH thing (or some variation of that), do you have DH's that would also want to be the SAH parent?

Our agreement is basically that one of us WILL stay home. The person making more money (and also needs to somewhat LIKE their job) will go to work each day. It could be me working. It could be him working. I guess it could be both of us working at different times even, but our kids will not be in daycare.

Part of me thinks, "Great! I'll be the SAHM I guess. I hope I don't go crazy!" If it were to happen now, it would be me as the SAH parent. However, DH has said several times he secretly hopes I get the high paying job so he can stay home with the kids. Anyone else have a husband like that?

Sunshine

03-01-2006, 09:05 AM

Cloth or disposable? (diapers that is)
So funny, we actually just talked about this the other day.
We decided that we will try and use both! I dont know Exactly how we will do it, but we figured if we were both at home(evenings), no reason why we cant Try to use cloth. I will be on maternity for a year tho, so I have plenty of time to figure it out:p
We will give it at try at the very least!
At night time, definately disposable.....

For those of you doing the SAH thing (or some variation of that), do you have DH's that would also want to be the SAH parent?
Well, if I do decide to go back to work after the year maternity leave, my DH will take 2 months of that to stay at home with baby, and I would go back to work.....we think it would be a great bonding experience for them both.....So I would get 10 months, and DH 2.....
If it works out that I CAn be a SAHM, then I would like for him to take at least 6 months of my maternity leave, then he could stay at home with us for that time.....
He doesnt Really want to be a F/T SAHD, unless we both were able to stay home:p.....but he would like some time off to be with our baby!

honeygirl

03-01-2006, 09:11 AM

For those of you doing the SAH thing (or some variation of that), do you have DH's that would also want to be the SAH parent?

No, at least not at this point. I'm relieved to be honest, I wouldn't want to feel like DH was missing out or I was missing out. I make FAR FAR FAR less than my DH, so it won't be an issue for us to decide who stays home. However, I have a friend who is conflicted b/c both her and her DH REALLY want to be SAH parents. She has the same job as her DH but makes more $. Tricky tricky.

Cloth or disposable?
I'm not sure. I've been around cloth diapers in the past (when I worked at a daycare) and they smelled! Icky to deal with, but if it's better for the baby then maybe. I think a diaper service would make the whole process more attractive, otherwise disposable it is!

Artist - Your questions are great, keep them coming. :)

LeslieandPaul

03-01-2006, 09:54 AM

Cloth or disposable?
I haven't decided yet. While cloth diapers are very economical, disposable diapers are much easier to deal with, and I can get grossed out pretty easily so cloth might not be the best.

For those of you doing the SAH thing (or some variation of that), do you have DH's that would also want to be the SAH parent?
I will be a SAHM. I'm sure DH would like to be a SAH parent, but he has higher earning potential so he will be the one who has to work.

PookiePrincess

03-01-2006, 10:02 AM

Cloth or disposable?

Honestly, I've lurked in the cloth diapering thread and thought it is kinda neat. However, if I am working and my baby is in daycare, I don't think it's really that feasible. I know when I worked in daycare if a mom would have walked in and said cloth diapers only, I'd have looked at her like she had 3 heads. I like the pros of cloth diapers (baby's skin, better for the environment, quicker to potty train) but I honestly don't think we'd have the patience to keep up with the cleaning/laundry that comes with it with us both working.

For those of you doing the SAH thing (or some variation of that), do you have DH's that would also want to be the SAH parent?

I mention being a SAHM and my DH thinks I'm nuts. He thinks I'd be bored in a week. He could never do it, he'd get stir crazy. That's fine with me, I'd love to stay at home! Now when I'm off for the summers, I get bored, but it's different when you have a baby to take care of. But I honestly don't think I'll have that luxury (but I'd like to!).

DansGirl

03-01-2006, 10:15 AM

Cloth or disposable?

Disposable. I'll be a WOH mom, so that's what we'll do. But as I side note, I remember having to clean cloth diapers when I was 10 and my little sister was a baby. The fact that I can still remember how much I hated it nearly 20 years later - says that I obviously hated it. (Mental note - remind sassy teenage sister that I used to have to clean her cloth diapers next time I want her to do something for me :D )

For those of you doing the SAH thing (or some variation of that), do you have DH's that would also want to be the SAH parent?

Both DH & I will WOH after maternity/paternity leave, although our schedules will be pretty flexible so that (hopefully) I'll have one day a week off & maybe he'll have an afternoon off each week. DH has talked about being a SAHD, but I don't think too seriously.

stevesbabygirl

03-01-2006, 11:10 AM

What types of things will you do to promote learning in your child?
I am the musical one in the family, so I will definitely involve music a lot, whether it be playing it in the womb (I read somewhere that they can't hear in the womb until 24 weeks), playing it to get them to sleep, etc. I would also love to take them to museums, and if they do watch TV, I'd go more for educational programs like Baby Einstein and stuff like that. I taught myself to read at age 4, so I want to be able to instill that in my children also. DH is the athlete in the family, so he'll definitely be on the motor skills side :).

Do you secretly hope your child will be nerdy?
I want our kids to do well in school, and understand the math and science subjects better than I did. DH was a math major, so I'm sure it could happen. I would rather them be a nerd than the popular spoiled brat, but I'd want them to be a "cool nerd," if that makes sense. Like, the kid that's totally dorky, but everyone loves them.

Cloth or disposable?
Disposable.

For those of you doing the SAH thing (or some variation of that), do you have DH's that would also want to be the SAH parent?
I'm hoping to be able to stay home when we have kids. However, at the job I work now, I work an average of once a week, so I wouldn't see a problem with keeping that up. I'm sure my DH would love to stay at home; at least that's what he says. But when he has extended time off work, he is so bored, he doesn't know what to do with himself. I realize that it's different when you're running around after a kid, but he really does thrive in his work environment.

Janey

03-01-2006, 12:31 PM

Cloth or disposable? (diapers that is)
Disposable. But I really want to look into gdiaper flushable diapers (http://www.gdiapers.com/). I think these look like a fantastic compromise.

For those of you doing the SAH thing (or some variation of that), do you have DH's that would also want to be the SAH parent?
Nooope. B is an Associate Principal Architect at the 5th largest firm in our state and he LOVES it & wouldn't want to give that up. I am currently a SAHW (though i'm sincerely considering a PT job at Pottery Barn or one of its affiliates so I can get a discount on baby gear :o), so it's pretty apparent in our household who will stay home.

laurenc

03-01-2006, 12:35 PM

artist -- thanks! DH and i are both nitpicky, detail-oriented scientists and we both sometimes come off as either indecisive or paranoid on the basis of our constant inability to shut up with the questions ;)

Cloth or disposable? (diapers that is)

i personally would like to give cloth a try.

For those of you doing the SAH thing (or some variation of that), do you have DH's that would also want to be the SAH parent?

DH has said that if we could afford for him to be a SAHD, he would love to do that. but his job pays really well and he likes it, and i like my work too, so we both plan to work.

i think that my academic career will allow me some flexibility in being home part of the time while working the equivalent of a full-time job (i.e., teaching at night). DH will likely be able to telecommute to work part of the time, which gives him flexibility. we are hoping that for the first year, we can combine our flexibilities to reduce the amount of daycare we'll have to seek out.

artist

03-01-2006, 12:59 PM

Flushable diapers? Who knew!

Smittenk

03-01-2006, 01:25 PM

Cloth or disposable? (diapers that is)

I really want to give cloth a go...probably go with a diapering service. DH and I are now desensitized to having to wash disgusting stuff out of fabric courtesy of our puppy so that doesn't really worry me at all.

artist

03-01-2006, 02:02 PM

tippy

03-01-2006, 03:11 PM

Cloth or disposable? (diapers that is)
Not sure. My parents did cloth diapers with me and my sis, so I might look into that.

For those of you doing the SAH thing (or some variation of that), do you have DH's that would also want to be the SAH parent?
We've talked about this some. If we have a child any time in the near future (which we are not planning on), DH would probably be the SAHD just b/c I work full-time and my income is really the one that supports us. If things work out the way we plan DH and I will be working full-time when we decide to have kids, so we'll be doing daycare.

stevesbabygirl

03-01-2006, 03:47 PM

My DH is so germophobic and all that jazz, I couldn't see him allowing me to use our washing machine to clean poopy cloth diapers. We'd definitely have to use a service, but I'm sure that's a little pricey.

stevesbabygirl

03-01-2006, 03:50 PM

OMG, those flushable diapers look awesome!

tashaw6

03-03-2006, 11:16 AM

Cloth or disposable? (diapers that is)
I would have to say disposable. I always thought that cloth was cheaper, but if you think about all the cleaning, sterilizing, nappy liners etc it comes out to the same price. Pampers are so good with the 'breathing' that they are pretty good at keeping nappy rash etc away.

For those of you doing the SAH thing (or some variation of that), do you have DH's that would also want to be the SAH parent?

Yip. We will try both get time off. We pretty much both contibute 50/50 to our income so hopefully when we have a baby we can each take time out and bond with baby.

Janey

03-03-2006, 01:05 PM

OMG, those flushable diapers look awesome!
Don't they?? I found them on - of all things! - a gardening website. You can compost the wet ones, amazingly enough!

I hope they work. :D There is a thread about it (http://www.constantchatter.com/showthread.php?t=13556&) in the parenting section.

candy corn

03-03-2006, 02:03 PM

Cloth or disposable? (diapers that is)
I'm all for disposable - I think they're just easier to deal with in the long run... I can't imagine trying to wash out poopy diapers, and although I hope to be able to afford a diaper service by the time we have kids, I just don't see us having the patience for that :rolleyes:

For those of you doing the SAH thing (or some variation of that), do you have DH's that would also want to be the SAH parent?
We hope that I'll be able to be a SAHM - at least for the most part... I'm going back to school to be a dental hygienest, so my schedule can be pretty flexible if I need to work. I think my DH would love to spend as much time with the kids as possible (thus the reason we can't TTC until his residency is well under way!). He wants to be an ER doctor, so he'll probably end up working only 3 or 4 days a week and can be home for them then.

Julss05

03-03-2006, 06:44 PM

Cloth or disposable? (diapers that is)
Disposable! My mom used cloth with all of us, she had 6 of us and who got to help with the cloth diapers? Me! So no I've had my fill of cloth diapers.:p

For those of you doing the SAH thing (or some variation of that), do you have DH's that would also want to be the SAH parent?
Actually I don't plan to be a SAH mom but we've talked about DH sort of doing that. He only works 11 days out of the month as a firefighter so the other days he's not working as long as he hasn't had a horrific shift he may be the SAH parent with the ability to take care of stuff during the day when I'm at work.

stevesbabygirl

03-04-2006, 01:11 PM

Hey ladies, guess what?

The Dr. Phil showed called us today, and they want us on the show! The bad news is that they're taping on Thursday, and I have a case that day. Luckily, it's a liposuction case, which means that they don't really need me in the room. I called my boss, probably one of the most nerve-wracking phone calls I've ever made, and I told her what was going on. Surprisingly, she was pretty cool with it, so we're going full steam ahead on this show. If anything, I hope that this will settle the score among other couples who are dealing with the same situation.

Steve is so funny. When he got the call, he wanted us to be on the show soooooooo badly, but then when I finally got the doctor's permission, he got all concerned. He asked me a thousand times if I wanted to do this, and said it wasn't too late to back out, blah blah blah. It's like he finally realized how much this kinda freaks me out. But he said that if Dr. Phil agreed with me, we could start TTC right away! Here's hoping that I'm right :p.

melnv

03-04-2006, 01:35 PM

steve'sbabygirl- That is too funny! I can't believe you are going on Dr. Phil over this. What exactly is the show about?

Cloth Diapers- probably not. Flushable, worth looking into.

stevesbabygirl

03-04-2006, 01:40 PM

The show is titled "Settle This," so it's about two people presenting their side of an issue, and then Dr. Phil weighs in and says what he thinks.

Smittenk

03-04-2006, 01:55 PM

Stevesbabygirl...I can't believe it!! I definitely want to see it. You'll have to let us know when it's on. I'll have to go over to someones house who gets AFN so I can watch it :p

I wonder what Dr Phil is going to say...I think it is such a common issue with couples.

stevesbabygirl

03-04-2006, 02:01 PM

I'll definitely let you ladies know when it's on!

I'm sure DH is going to win this one. We had to complete the sentence "Dr. Phil, I'm right because __________" and he said it was because we aren't financially ready and because he's not emotionally ready. I'll lose simply because he said he wasn't emotionally ready. Damn it!

honeygirl

03-04-2006, 02:08 PM

Oh my gosh I can't believe you are actually going on the show. You are so brave! I'm crossing my fingers that the show goes your way! At least you don't have to wait long for the taping. Do you get a free trip out of it?

Janey

03-04-2006, 03:01 PM

NO WAY!!!

OMG heather i hope they tell you what day it airs cause i am SO WATCHING THAT SHOW!!

Oh yeah and could you tell Dr. Phil that it would help the people watching if he gave some more general advice on how to deal with some of the topics on the thread so people at home could also help their loved ones, instead of just helping the people on TV? Thanks. ;) Just kiddin', but that's always one of the things that has bugged me about that show.

tippy

03-04-2006, 09:12 PM

OMG, stevesbabygirl, that is awesome!!!! I love Dr. Phil - but he scares me too. He can be so brutally honest sometimes!! ;) Anyway, PLEASE let us know when your show comes on. I will be in front of the TV, even if it means leaving work early :).

stevesbabygirl

03-04-2006, 09:29 PM

Thanks for the support ladies :D!

honeygirl, we only live half an hour from Los Angeles, which is where they tape, so no free trip for us :p.

tashaw6

03-05-2006, 08:06 AM

Oh my gosh, Heather!! Damn that I don't get that show here...how funny it would be though cause they would certainly dubb you if they did! Ooo, you have to tell us what transpires! hopefully you are right and you can TTC asap!

stevesbabygirl

03-05-2006, 11:22 AM

Where do you live tasha?

tashaw6

03-05-2006, 11:50 PM

Where do you live tasha?

I stay in Germany at the moment!

artist

03-06-2006, 09:51 AM

You are being taped THIS Thursday on Dr. Phil? When will the show air? On Friday? On Monday? Please tell us! Heck, I'll try to make my lunch time at 3:00 that day if I have to! (Or ask DH to figure out how we can tape stuff on the VCR!) How will we know who you are? (We know you don't look like your avatar!) Does Dr. Phil know about this thread?

stevesbabygirl

03-06-2006, 10:14 AM

artist, my name is Heather and DH is Steve, so when you hear those names, that will be us! The crew will be at my house in 45 minutes :eek:, so I'll try to see if I can get an air date then. I don't think he knows about this thread, but I do plan to make a mention of it when I'm being interviewed.

Here's a picture of us for reference:
http://static.flickr.com/35/103228632_827a1b888d.jpg?v=0

Janey

03-06-2006, 10:29 AM

Heather - you gotta let Katy know that Constant Chatter is soon to be famous! :D

Sunshine

03-06-2006, 10:57 AM

stevesbabygirl~I was going to ask you the other day if you heard anything else! I cant wait to watch! I hope it all goes well!

Definately ask if they know the air date, I dont normally watch the show, but I totally will that day:)

DelSol

03-06-2006, 11:29 AM

Heather! Let us know when you'll be one, I don't have a VCR so hopefully someone can fill me on the day. I don't even know when Dr. Phil is on. :o Must be when I am working. Good Luck!!!

Cloth or disposable? (diapers that is)
Probably disposable.

For those of you doing the SAH thing (or some variation of that), do you have DH's that would also want to be the SAH parent?
I think my DH would love to be a SAH parent, he hates work and hates working for someone else. Me, on the other hand, I don't want him home, he has been home on disability for almost a year, he went out in February timeframe and went back in June and back out on August and it's time for him to go back to work plus I'm afraid of what he'll teach the child.

For me, I am torn, I would love to stay at home but I like my job so I guess I will have to wait and see what happens when the time comes. I know I was unemployed for 2 months and bored but I know it will be different when you have a baby at home to take care of.

artist

03-06-2006, 03:12 PM

Does anyone else on this website realize Heather is about to be famous?:)

Yes, Katy needs to know this! Whether or not Dr. Phil mentions this website, the other members of this website should know!

Heather, when/if you find out the air date of the show, you should post a thread announcing it in the Chit Chat section which is read by a lot of people! (And, heck, post another one in the t.v. section too!)

eli1126

03-06-2006, 05:27 PM

Heather Good for you! This may be the best thing for you and Steve. It will be a third party with no feeling one way or another on the issue. Try not to think of it as winning or losing, because you have some very valid feelings in all this! Good Luck! I wish I had the nerve to make DH go on Dr. Phil.

Cloth or disposable?

Probably disposable

SAHM/D
DH will be here a lot during the week so he will be a SAHD for the most part.

Beth

jnettie

03-06-2006, 05:35 PM

stevesbabygirl! OMG! Dr. Phil! I wouldn't garantee DH will be right. He may have a point financially, but emotionally? Dr. Phil could say he's hiding behind it or refusing to grow up or something. You just have to think really good and hard about your sentence. ;)

Cloth or disposable? (diapers that is)
Good gravy, I'm all for helping the environment, but disposable, please!

For those of you doing the SAH thing (or some variation of that), do you have DH's that would also want to be the SAH parent?
DH and I are actually both extremely lucky on this part. We each work in fields that would be welcoming to babies and little kids. I work from home usually, as an office, and Theater is such a open place for kids. There's always someone around to hold a baby. DH is still a student (PhD, so it could be years!) and teaches, but his schools are welcoming to people bringing their kids. One of his professors regularly brings her little girl when she teaches.

stevesbabygirl

03-06-2006, 07:00 PM

You ladies are all so wonderful!

stevesbabygirl

03-06-2006, 07:01 PM

It is now 7:00, and the crew is still at our house! They started my interview a little after 12, and it took about an hour and a half, and then they shot footage of me showing off my guest room, all the baby stuff I had bought, etc.

My cousin came over and brought her baby, and she was sooooooo good! She got fussy towards the end, but she was so freaking adorable. You ladies are going to love her!

They wanted to make it fun and upbeat, so I had to overact a little bit, and make my desire a little more than it really is. I'm sure I painted myself to be a total psycho. They directed every sequence, prompting me on how to act, what to say, etc. It's been really fun though.

After they do Steve's interview, we're going to do our plea to the camera, and then we're going to the mall to check out a baby store. Unfortunately, they couldn't get permission to go to BRU and TRU, but this little store will be good. They have a lot of baby furniture, including the set that I want.

This has been a lot of fun, but now I'm so tired! Now I have a tiny inkling of how actors feel on a daily basis, my God. And we still haven't even gotten to the talking with Dr. Phil part! Still no information on show date, but I'll keep you all informed!

tashaw6

03-07-2006, 05:04 AM

Wow! Still can't believe you did it! So brave! :D

eli1126

03-07-2006, 05:27 AM

Wow! Still can't believe you did it! So brave! :D

ITA!

Beth

artist

03-07-2006, 09:21 AM

That is so funny that they made you act!

I asked DH to help me figure out our VCR so I can tape you guys on Dr. Phil. He groaned because he gets so annoyed with Dr. Phil! I told him I really did also just want to know how to use our VCR anyway.

Sunshine

03-07-2006, 10:59 AM

Heather~It sounds like you had alot of fun with it! I am SO ANXIOUS to watch:)

stevesbabygirl

03-07-2006, 11:58 AM

It was a lot of fun, but Steve and I were exhausted by the end of the day!

The sweet part was that when we went to the baby store in the mall to film, the owner showed up and told us that he would hook us up when we decided to TTC! Sweet, a discount!

adamseve

03-07-2006, 10:07 PM

I've officially contracted the baby bug:

adamseve
Me: Ivette, 27
DH: Adam, 28
Married: 06.19.04
TTC: Spring '07

I'll be finishing up my master's in speech/language pathology this May and am excited to start working again ... but we really want a baby. The current plan is to work for a year - and start TTC in Spring of '07. Looking forward to meeting everyone here!

Stevesbabygirl - how exciting for you to be on Dr. Phil ... I'll be sure to DVR the episode, if it hasn't aired yet.

PookiePrincess

03-07-2006, 10:11 PM

Welcome, adamseve!

stevesbabygirl

03-07-2006, 11:11 PM

Welcome adamseve, and thanks for the congrats :D!

tashaw6

03-08-2006, 12:09 AM

Welcome adamseve ...this baby bug is VERY contagious!

stevesbabygirl

03-09-2006, 06:35 PM

Oh my God you guys, Dr. Phil was so fun today! We got up at 5:15 (UGH!), showered, and headed off to my work. I set up a few things, just in time for the driver to pick us up at 6:30. We got to the studio before 7:30, which is pretty good time considering we were driving into LA during the morning rush hour. We waited in the car for a few minutes, and then we were brought inside! They had these little breakfast packs of a banana or chocolate muffin, and a bagel. They also had water for us in our dressing rooms. My new avatar is from the sign that they put outside our dressing room door. How cool is that?!

When we got to the dressing rooms, they looked at our outfits. They didn't like Steve's tie, and his pants were too short, so they gave him a new tie and another pair of pants. They didn't like my outfit at all, because they didn't want us to both be in dark colors, so I ended up in a whole new outfit! I went there with a black button down shirt, black pants, black loafers, and a teal sweater blazer, and ended up going on stage with a gray suit, a turquoise shirt, and different black shoes.

After wardrobe, I was sent to makeup. They made me look damn good :). I can't believe I spent $300 for someone to do my makeup for my wedding, and this was free! Same quality too; it's 8 hours later and it still looks good! After makeup, they did my hair. They flat ironed it, and I loved how it came out. Almost makes me want to run out and buy one. I got lots of compliments on my hair from the lady who did it; she referred to it as virgin hair, because I've never dyed or highlighted it.

When we were all prettied up (Steve got a little powder too), we headed to a holding area behind the studio audience. I was getting so excited and nervous at this time; we were going to be on TV! Since the producers loved the energy we had in our interview, they put us on first, woo hoo :D! The other couples (there were 4 other couples) were seated in the front row, and we hid out behind the audience until after Dr. Phil did his introduction.

As soon as the music started, we got so excited and nervous! Dr. Phil came out, talked about the show's topic for the day, and then introduced our video. For that 10 hours that the crew spent at our house, our video was only like 30-60 seconds! They hardly put any of the good stuff in! Kari's website was only on screen for like a second; I was bummed. While they were playing our video, we walked out to the chairs, shook hands with Dr. Phil, and sat down. I got to sit closer to him; I guess he almost always has the female sit closest :).

Once the video was done, we chatted a little, and then he pointed back to the screen behind him to show who he thought was right. He ended up agreeing with Steve, which I figured would happen, and it was fine with me. It said it in big huge letters too: "Steve is right." I'm sure he'll brag about it until the end of time :p. However, Dr. Phil did validate my desire to have a baby, and suggested that we formulate a plan, and work towards that. Steve failed to mention how much money I make at the plastic surgeon's office, so when Dr. Phil did the math, he said that we only have $116 left over each month after paying bills, which isn't true at all. But I guess it will be even easier to work towards our goal if we factor in the money I'm making.

We were only up there for about 5 minutes or so; it was over so quickly! I thought we had gotten less time than everyone else, because it went by so fast, but when I talked to my mom later, she said that we seemed to get as much time as everyone else. One of the producers said that the first segment, which we were on, is the longest segment, but we weren't in half of it because Dr. Phil was doing his introduction and stuff.

In the end, Dr. Phil ended up agreeing with everyone who had sent the letters. Luckily, I wasn't the only girl who he didn't agree with; I would've felt pretty stupid then :p. I wish we had had more time to chat with Dr. Phil, but I guess he had some stuff to do in the afternoon, which is why our taping got bumped up.

I still have no idea when it airs; I don't think the producers even know! We asked, and no one could give us an answer, though it sounds like it will be in April sometime. They said that the producers would call us when they found out, or we could just keep checking the Dr. Phil website.

So that was pretty much our day! We had a great time in the car on the way back, remembering the day, and marveling over how quickly it passed. I had to go to work after that; got back in just in time for a minor procedure. Luckily, it wasn't a late night, and I was home by about 5:30.

I am sooooooo glad that I decided to do the show. I was so nervous at first, but it turned to be so much fun, and Dr. Phil made me feel so at ease while I was up there. It truly was a once in a lifetime opportunity, and one that I will never forget!

honeygirl

03-09-2006, 06:45 PM

Heather - I am so glad that the Dr Phil experience was fun and that you are happy with how it turned out. Does Steve have any other thoughts on TTC now that you've been on the show? Yes he was "right", but did it help him think about anything differently?

Did you get to keep the new outfit?

Congrats on your tv adventure. Pretty soon you're going to be famous! Let us know when you get the broadcast date.

-Anne

tashaw6

03-09-2006, 10:57 PM

hahaha! I had same thoughts as honeygirl...did you get to keep the outfit...lololol!

Sounds like such a cool experience! Still think you're mighty brave... :D
Yeah, what does Steve have to say about TTC-ing now? Do you have to wait longer now?

Smittenk

03-09-2006, 11:30 PM

Wow Heather...sounds like you had such a great time on the show!! Love the pic in your avatar!!

I figured he would agree with the people who wrote letters :(
What does Steve say about it know?
Can't wait to see it!!!

eli1126

03-10-2006, 05:56 AM

Ok, I have my DVR set to tape Dr. Phil :o Can't wait to see it! Heather, you are so brave!

Beth

Sunshine

03-10-2006, 10:11 AM

That is SO GREAT Heather! It sounds like you had a REALLY good time:) And how great you got a little pampering as well:)
I LOVE your new avatar:D

DelSol

03-10-2006, 12:15 PM

Heather~ I have to agree with everyone else sounds like you had a great time!

I'm gonna have to figure out how to tape it. What channel is he on? I'm thinking NBC but I could be wrong.

stevesbabygirl

03-10-2006, 12:46 PM

Hey ladies :D! Unfortunately, I didn't get to keep the outfit, but I'm going to laugh my ass off the next time I see someone wearing it on the show :p. Steve and I went to dinner last night, and he admitted that he did enjoy being around the baby during the taping. Yay for progress :D! I told him I wanted to TTC in the next 4-5 months, and he thinks that's doable! So if anything, going on Dr. Phil made Steve agree more with my side.

DelSol, he's on CBS now.

Janey

03-10-2006, 12:53 PM

DelSol - Dr. Phil is syndicated, which means whatever station pays for him, gets him. He is on NBC in my area. I think you'll have to check drphil.com or tvguide.com to find your station.

Heather - I'm so glad you had a fantastic time on the show! It sounds soooo exciting. I can't wait to see it! And hoooooray for post-phil progress with Steve! :D

tashaw6

03-10-2006, 12:57 PM

Heather...4-5 months is totally doable! DH wants to time everything so that the baby is born and then I turn 30! (All my days of telling him I want to have a child before I turn 30)...wish I could TTC in 4-5 months...Maybe I should write to Dr Phil (seen as he agrees with the person who writes! :D)

DelSol

03-10-2006, 01:28 PM

Thanks Heather & MrsHill ~ I found out he's on CBS in my area.

stevesbabygirl

03-10-2006, 01:37 PM

Well if we TTC in the next 4-5 months, then we need to get pg right away, because Steve's aunt is coming out here with her granddaughter and taking her to Disneyland as an 8th grade graduation present. I said I would go with them so that she wouldn't have to ride by herself, so obviously, I can't be pregnant then!

stevesbabygirl

03-11-2006, 05:25 PM

We have an air date! Our Dr. Phil show is scheduled to air April 13th! Set your TiVos and VCRs everybody!

Sunshine

03-11-2006, 05:35 PM

We have an air date! Our Dr. Phil show is scheduled to air April 13th! Set your TiVos and VCRs everybody!
OMG, I am SO EXCITED! going to mark it on my calendar right now:)

tashaw6

03-12-2006, 03:23 AM

Dam it...some one has got to tape it for me!! :D

DelSol

03-12-2006, 07:52 AM

We have an air date! Our Dr. Phil show is scheduled to air April 13th! Set your TiVos and VCRs everybody!

Cool, I'll have to figure something out.

tippy

03-12-2006, 08:45 AM

We have an air date! Our Dr. Phil show is scheduled to air April 13th! Set your TiVos and VCRs everybody!
Heather that is so awesome! I can't wait to see it!!! :)

eli1126

03-12-2006, 08:57 AM

Heather, Thanks for the update!

A vent: Last night SIL had a party for DN's birthday. I mentioned something a family craft hanging on the wall (the cute crafty things that have the entire family's name on them) And I said, "Well we'll have to wait until we have kids" to DH, to which SIL seemed eager to say "Well you can get it with just your names or the cats names on them." The way she said it seemed like she wasn't too crazy about DH and I starting a family anytime soon. I think that fear stems from DH being unable to finance his parents entirely as he has been doing for the past 3-4 years. The reality is that she may actually have to share the burden because we won't be able to do everything the way we have been. I am certainly not going to put off having children just so we can be solely responsible for IL's :mad:

Beth

artist

03-13-2006, 12:36 PM

Heather,

Thanks for the description! It will be fun to see you on t.v.! Has anyone told Katy? Do other CCers know about this? They should!

stevesbabygirl

03-13-2006, 12:51 PM

Katy is one of my LJ journal buddies, so I'm sure she saw me write about it in there. I was going to post a thread once I found out the air date, so I guess I should do that now that I know when it's airing :D!

LeslieandPaul

03-16-2006, 09:59 AM

I need to vent. I tried to talk to DH about TTC the other day. He said "i thought we already talked about this," which we did, but nothing came of it, except that we'd talk about it later. I told him that it was never resolved and he replied with "well we'll have to talk about it later then" and then didn't say anything for awhile (we were on msn) and then he changed the subject. After the last time we talked about it (when I was in hysterics) you'd think he'd know it was important to me and he can't just brush it off. And I know that he wants kids eventually, and he's always talking about having to plan to make things happen, but he NEVER includes kids in that plan. I'm just starting to get frustrated because I thought we may start TTC this year, but it's looking like it won't be until next year.
It feels so good to get that out. I'm glad I can come here and share my feelings.

honeygirl

03-16-2006, 11:35 AM

LeslieandPaul - Sorry to hear about your NCTCDH (non commital to conceive dear husband). I can relate to the frustration of wanting something NOW that our DH doesn't (yet). All I can say is be patient and if you know that he eventually wants kids, then he will come around.

And of course, come in here to vent. We understand!!

-Anne

candy corn

03-16-2006, 11:51 AM

LeslieandPaul, I'm sorry to hear about your DH putting off the TTC conversation! I know that my DH and I have to wait a long time before we TTC (he needs to finish up med school and part of his residency first), so he definately is part of the "we'll talk about it later" group - but I just needed to know when - 5 years, 6 years, whatever. So I got him to talk about it, and we've agreed to TTC after he finishes his second year of residency, which is fine with me - now I have something to plan my life around. Maybe if your DH knows that you just want to know when (without it having to be right now - clearly he's not ready right now?), he'll be more likely to enter into a conversation about it?? good luck!!!

stevesbabygirl

03-17-2006, 11:16 AM

Leslie, that was a very familiar conversation in our house for a long time. Just know that he will come around. As hard as it is, and as much as I haven't been able to do it, I would try not to push the conversation. One of my friends told me that if I pushed him into it, he would end up resenting me and resenting the child.

artist

03-17-2006, 02:45 PM

Granted, I am not ready myself TTC, so I haven't run into that problem, though I can say this...my DH is stubborn. (As am I!) So, if any of you are also married to stubborn men, just remember this; my DH is almost guaranteed NOT to want to do something if pushed. If anything, reverse psychology works better with him. (Not that I encourage you all to go home and say, "Gee, I changed my mind. I don't want to have babies for a loooooooooooong time!" as that would not only be dishonest, but your DH's will see through it!)

But, just remember how to approach stubborn people if you're married to one. You have to sort of wait until the person thinks it's THEIR idea. Not sure how I would suggest approaching that as I sometimes fail at it myself, but just wanted to throw that out there.

eli1126

03-18-2006, 07:20 AM

LeslieandPaul I totally sympathize! I also want to second this:

One of my friends told me that if I pushed him into it, he would end up resenting me and resenting the child. posted by: stevesbabygirl

As hard as it is, it is much better to wait until both of you are ready to even discuss TTC. DH told me guys don't necessarily want a "timeline" or a "TTC date" because if they feel they aren't ready now, they don't want to promise that they will be ready by a certain date. They would rather wait until they are ready and then talk about it. Very Frustrating! Hang in there, he'll come around!

Beth

adamseve

03-18-2006, 10:37 AM

LeslieandPaul - Rest assured ... men are stubborn but they do come around ... You have our support!

DelSol

03-18-2006, 01:49 PM

LeslieandPaul - Rest assured ... men are stubborn but they do come around ... You have our support!

Well put and I couldn't agree more.

honeygirl

03-19-2006, 02:00 PM

Just wanted to post here to congratulate our latest graduate. We'll call her the MG for now (mystery graduate). Best wishes on your TTC journey. Make sure to let us know as soon as you get the BFP!!!!

-Anne

stevesbabygirl

03-19-2006, 02:04 PM

Well ladies, it's true, men DO come around! Case in point: My DH. When CD1 hits, we are officially TTC :D! We were going to wait 4-5 months, but DH feels like there's something missing in his life, and that he's ready to start a family.

Thank you Dr. Phil :D!

I will still be your threadmistress, of course :). When this one gets full and we move onto volume 3, which is probably going to be soon, I will need a successor :). I will probably create a Ladies In Waiting screen name, then hand the password over to the next threadmistress. Or, you can just appoint a new TM without creating the name. What do you all think?

stevesbabygirl

03-19-2006, 02:05 PM

Thank you honeygirl, you're so sweet :D!

miaclear

03-19-2006, 02:11 PM

Goodluck Stevesbabygirl! I can't wait to see the episode too...I have it written down on my calendar :D

I didn't think to ask to graduate me. DH and I started TTC this month.

tippy

03-19-2006, 05:23 PM

Dizzy

03-19-2006, 05:45 PM

Congrats Heather!

stevesbabygirl

03-19-2006, 06:28 PM

Thanks for the congrats ladies :D! And congrats to you too miaclear, I'll move you to the graduate section :).

curlyjr

03-19-2006, 06:51 PM

Can I join? We just set a TTC time!

Me:Jillian 27
DH: John 26
Married: 6/11/2005
TTC:October 2008

stevesbabygirl

03-19-2006, 06:55 PM

Welcome aboard curly :D!

DelSol

03-19-2006, 07:40 PM

Congrats Heather! That's great news!

Well, I am hoping to have good news in the next few months. DH is talking with his therapist and it looks like he'll be going back to work on 4/10, it will only start out as part time but it's moving him back in the direction of work.

DelSol

03-20-2006, 04:50 AM

I will still be your threadmistress, of course :). When this one gets full and we move onto volume 3, which is probably going to be soon, I will need a successor :). I will probably create a Ladies In Waiting screen name, then hand the password over to the next threadmistress. Or, you can just appoint a new TM without creating the name. What do you all think?

Sounds good, I'll volunteer to be the next threadmistress. I think creating the Ladies In Waiting screen name sounds good.

Smittenk

03-20-2006, 07:19 AM

Yey Heather! That is awesome that your DH came around...what a 180!! You should come one over to the Maybe Mamas 2006 Thread

artist

03-20-2006, 09:15 AM

Congrats Heather and miaclear! (And welcome curlyjr!)

So, when all of us see you on t.v., we will all know what really happened!

stevesbabygirl

03-20-2006, 10:52 AM

LMAO @ artist :D!

Alrighty Dana, you'll be our next threadmistress, yay :D!

smitten, I just joined it last night :).

eli1126

03-20-2006, 12:55 PM

Congrats Heather! Let us know when you get your BFP!!!

Cycle frustration Today is cycle day 25 and AF is here :( Last month is was cycle day 26. Before that it was a regular 28 day cycle except when I was on steroids. Then it seems that the past two cycles that O was off as well. A few days after AF leaves, I start the EWCM instead of about a week and a half to two weeks after AF ends :eek: Could it be stress? I am in the home stretch of school, but I was just on Spring Break and I was pretty relaxed or so I thought :confused: Any suggestions.....

Beth

DelSol

03-20-2006, 01:34 PM

VENT

Bad News for DH -> his HR Manager called and told him if he is not back to work by Wednesday he's FIRED. So much is going through my mind right now.

He was just in contact with his HR Manager 2 weeks ago telling him that he was going to come back part time, for him to call DH. HR Manager just called him back today and told him this. We have a letter stating DH could come back to work part time, it goes to show you this company is not willing to work with DH and this could be considered retaliatory harassment (or something like that, he’s already spoken to his attorney about this because of the events that happened when he went back in June). Now DH is contacting his attorney to see if we have a case against them.

ETA: We're gonna be stocking up on baby products now (and other items they make too) because of those pricks!

Not good... :mad:
END OF VENT

Yay! I can't wait to start being the new threadmistress. :D

Sunshine

03-20-2006, 01:47 PM

DelSol~What happened that your DH had to take time off of work? Is it a WCB related claim?
And who wrote the letter stating he could only work P/T? Was it his doctor?
Sorry that you are having to go through this, I hope that something gets worked out soon.....

DelSol

03-20-2006, 03:56 PM

raven077

03-20-2006, 05:23 PM

stevesbabygirl

03-20-2006, 06:44 PM

Looks like I'll be around another month :rolleyes:. DH wants to wait for the next cycle after this upcoming one to TTC because of some financial stuff. Still close, but I had totally gotten my hopes up to start trying now.

Sunshine

03-21-2006, 09:09 AM

Sunshine~ He's out on disability, well actually unpaid leave since the disability company thinks he is not ill and keep denying the claims (he only went out on disability because his company told him). He has IBS, Irritable Bowl Syndrome, which has been causing him a lot of problems for over a year now. It's his disability company that wrote the letter saying he could work P/T. His doctor thought it was a good idea because normally his attacks are in the AM hours so he would go back from 12noon - 4PM/5PM. He did go back from a month or so but because of how he was treated when he was back it started the IBS back up again. They were constantly watching him, telling him he needed to catch up and were always looking over his shoulder and stopping by his office to see if he was there.

His disability attorney put him in touch with wrongful termination attorneys that he needs to call them tomorrow to see what will happen if he doesn't show up this Wednesday.

It's gonna be interesting and probably gonna get ugly.

On the bright side when I was driving home from work, I saw a rainbow. That always makes me feel good because on my wedding day I saw a rainbow too.
OMG, I KNEW I had to ask you for some reason.....
My Dad has Crohn's and Colitis, which is very similar to IBS. He is actually on a leave from work too, he is a driver and after having to stop 1 too many times in the middle of the street basically told his work he cant work anymore. He has been off for about 5 months now, and his work started to give him slack aswell.....
He ended up having to go on Unemployment, and in the end, will probably quit his job, b.c they are just being so unwilling to help.

I REALLY hope that the rainbow you saw is a preview to all the good things that are going to start happening for you both soon....I am so sorry that you have to go through all of this headache....It will get better:)

beetle

03-21-2006, 10:00 AM

Hello, ladies!
I just stumbled across this thread and thought I might as well join. I confess to a serious case of the baby bug. :) Here's my info:

beetle
Me: Jolene, 27, public relations for an insurance company
DH: Jon, 26, self-employed IT consultant
Married: June 23, 2002
TTC: August 2006 or later

laurenc

03-22-2006, 11:09 AM

anyone up for a new QOTD?

i am!

what activities did you do as a kid? do you plan to introduce your children to those activities?

i was always an active kid -- in elementary school i took lessons in ballet, gymnastics, horseback riding, ice skating... in HS and somewhat in college i ran track and cross-country, and i still run today -- i would definitely love to get my kids involved in some kind of active sport early on. DH swam all his life, up through college, so he feels the same way. we would want our children to take up sports that we know a lot about and that we might even be able to do along with them, but as long as they're active, that's fine by us.

i was a Girl Scout for 12 years, and i'd definitely like to see my potential future daughters involved in Scouting because i loved my experience. and DH and i played instruments in junior high and HS and would like to see our kids involved in music at some level, be it singing or orchestra or band.

stevesbabygirl

03-22-2006, 11:33 AM

what activities did you do as a kid? do you plan to introduce your children to those activities?

I was in music growing up, and DH was in sports, so I hope to create a very well-rounded kid out of that :).

Smittenk

03-22-2006, 11:50 AM

Yey for new QOTD!

QOTD: what activities did you do as a kid? do you plan to introduce your children to those activities?

I loved being outdoors as a kid...riding my bike...playing with my dog same thing as every other kid! I want to introduce my kids to nature, animals and respect for them. The ocean, the beach, sports etc. I also did community theatre as a kid which I loved!! I just want them to sample everything to find what they love and be really open to everything.

LeslieandPaul

03-22-2006, 12:01 PM

QOTD: what activities did you do as a kid? do you plan to introduce your children to those activities?

I went camping every year with my family, I liked indoor rock climbing, going to the beach or pool, dancing. I plan on taking my children camping, and going to the beach or pool lots. If they want to try rock climbing or dance classes, I'll encourage them. DH was also big into martial arts (and still is) and gymnastics, so I imagine our children will take some sort of martial arts classes, and possibly gymnastics.
I want my kids to be more active and participate in more activities than I did. My mom was sick a lot when I was young which didn't give me the opportunity to do a lot of fun stuff, and I feel like I missed out on a lot.

dpangel33

03-22-2006, 12:33 PM

QOTD: what activities did you do as a kid? do you plan to introduce your children to those activities?

Growing up my mom gave me many options of different activities, and I liked being able to choose what I participated in. I took swim lessons, was a cheerleader, took part in many arts & crafts, played just about every sport in jr high and ended up dancing through out high school. DH played baseball and soccer in high school and now occasionally plays ice hockey.

I hope to give my kids the options I had growing up and I don't plan on making them participate in any particular activity, although DH has mentioned that his boys will grow up on the ice :rolleyes:

artist

03-22-2006, 01:23 PM

what activities did you do as a kid? do you plan to introduce your children to those activities?

What did I do as a kid?

-art (and plenty of art classes as that was/is my passion and has been from an early age)
-a ballet/tap class once when I was really little
-swimming lessons
-other classes as a little kid, including nursery school and preschool
-Sunday school
-played soccer in 4th and 5th grade (and was terrible at it!)
-Girl Scouts for a couple of years
-violin lessons
-various summer camps
-my own clubs I started (such as an environmentalist club I started with some neighborhood kids)
-student council in middle school
-a number of other things in high school (most of which were arts related, including a job as a tour guide at the Minneapolis Sculpture Gardens, took an art class in Chicago, played in school orchestra, etc.)
-volunteer work
-volunteered on a political campaign

DH's activities as a kid were (and this is all I can think of, there might be more):

-music (his main passion in life and still is)
-Boy Scouts
-preschool and I think for awhile Montessori school
-interested in things like building robots
-cross country running in high school
-swimming in high school
-into biking and camping and climbing types of things
-summer camps
-photography
-ceramics
-creative writing
-woodworking
-church type things such as a youth group for awhile

What our kids will likely do:

I think the ideal would be when our child is really young (as in, before kindergarden) I will try to expose him/her to a variety of things both in classes and in everyday life. I will pay attention to what he/she seems most interested in and try to nurture those interests. It wouldn't surprise me if our kids end up being interested in music and art simply because DH and I are. Though, I am not going to assume our kid will automatically be into the same stuff we are. However, I do want to have our kids at least play an instrument for a period of time. I also think for example swimming lessons are a common sense thing to have your kid do to prevent from a drowning incident. I would encourage our kids to be in Girl or Boy Scouts for at least one year just because it can be a really good thing to get involved in. I suppose our kids will probably go to Sunday School if we go to Church which we are currently doing. I hope we can send our kids to summer camp for a week or two, but camps are so expensive, so I hope we'll be able to pull that off! I guess it doesn't matter to me whether or not our kids are into sports. I think my main goal would be to nurture any passions our interests our kids have and try to expose them just a little bit to a variety of things.

PookiePrincess

03-22-2006, 03:24 PM

what activities did you do as a kid? do you plan to introduce your children to those activities?

I didn't do a lot when I was young, because my mom was a single mom and we were poor. I was in girl scouts for a year, my mom was the troop leader and said she'd never do that again! Other than that, we played outside a lot with other neighbor kids. In middle school I was in Drama, in high school I was in several clubs and danced.

I was never into organized sports and would like my kids to be, if they want to. I think one problem today is kids want to sit inside in front of the tv, computer, or video games and they don't play outside! No wonder so many kids are overweight today. I would love for my kids to be involved in whatever they want to be involved in. I would like my daughter, if I have one, to dance, but if it's not her thing, I'd be okay with that. I'll encourage whatever they want to try, without trying to overload their schedules.

Janey

03-22-2006, 03:42 PM

Activities...

When I was very young, I took piano lessons (which is actually one of my favorite stories about my dad, if anybody cares to hear about that), played softball, and was in the Blue Birds/Campfire. Then we moved to Alaska, and I made this face :mad: and said, "If you guys are going to make me move to this stupid frozen wasteland, I want to take figure skating lessons!!" To which they said, "Okay," and I said "Really??" And they said, "Sure." So I figure skated for a good long while. I never competed (it got really expensive really quickly to compete even locally), but I did shows and such, and it was a blast.

B did all sorts of things. He was even in the Youth Circus. :D

I think it's going to be very important to me to have our kids play a sport. It doesn't have to be competitive, and they don't have to be great at whatever it is... but I know that the moment I quit figure skating is the moment I started gaining weight. I don't want my kids to have to go through what I did. So, that's going to be one of my 'rules' ... Gotta stay active. You pick whatever it is, but be active.

honeygirl

03-22-2006, 04:12 PM

What activities did you do as a kid? do you plan to introduce your children to those activities?

Like many of you ladies I did A LOT of activities as a kid. Things like: dance (ballet, jazz, flaminco, etc), cheerleading, private music lessons (oboe, from 4th grade-college), piano lessons, volunteering, tennis, band, community symphony, acting, awana, choir, jazz band, jazz choir, etc. I did school club type things also, even starting a debate club at my school in the 8th grade.

I enjoyed being busy, but to be honest, now that I'm a therapist (children & families) I don't think it was such a great idea. Being over-scheduled can be harmful to children and encourage too much competition or perfectionism. Or at least that happened to me. I felt this drive to be good at EVERYTHING and since I was doing so many things, well it was hard.

I'll let my kids explore interests and activities, but only 1-2 at a time.

DelSol

03-23-2006, 05:56 AM

DelSol, completely off topic, but I happened to read a little snippet in our Sunday paper about preventative medicine and they mentioned something about Celiac Disease (http://www.celiac.com/index.html). It's almost like an allergy to gluten but it masquerades as a TON of other medical problems including IBS. Not sure what your hubby has been tested for, but if this hasn't come up, it's worth a shot to see if something as simple (kind of) as taking gluten out of his diet might help. Good luck with your legal battles...:(

I'm going to have to look into this.

OMG, I KNEW I had to ask you for some reason.....
My Dad has Crohn's and Colitis, which is very similar to IBS. He is actually on a leave from work too, he is a driver and after having to stop 1 too many times in the middle of the street basically told his work he cant work anymore. He has been off for about 5 months now, and his work started to give him slack as well.....
He ended up having to go on Unemployment, and in the end, will probably quit his job, b.c they are just being so unwilling to help.

Yup, before they really knew what IBS was, it was called Colitis.

DH did go to work yesterday but came home really early, he had been having panic attacks all night long and that started his IBS and he didn't sleep well. The HR person is pissed because DH told a co-worker he was going home and to let his boss know since he was in a meeting. DH called the boss after he got back from his doctor's appointment and electo-acupuncture. His was like well I guess you weren't ready to come back and he added HR was pissed because his boss was told to track DH's comings and goings.

eli1126

03-23-2006, 07:19 AM

What activities did you do as a kid? do you plan to introduce your children to those activities?

I did sports: softball, soccer, and cheerleading along girl scouts. I wasn't as involved as I would want my children to be, but like honeygirl, I don't want to overschedule. I think maybe 1-2 extra curriculuar activities a season would be ideal, but I definitely want them involved in something. DH was in Boy Scouts and I know he would like our children to be involved in scouting, but I would want something a bit more physical to go along with this.

Beth

jnettie

03-23-2006, 07:30 AM

What activities did you do as a kid? do you plan to introduce your children to those activities?
I took every type of dance class you can think of (except Folk Dancing, though I did take some African dance lessons in HS!), art, and music. I was pretty much busy with dance classes my whole youth, so not too many more activities were on my list. I was in Girl Scouts for 3 years, too, and went to camp for 2 summers.

DH did lots of stuff. Piano, saxaphone, and played bass in a HS grunge band! He was on the basketball and football teams. He was also in HS plays.

I think there'll be lots open to our kids. DH still plays guitar (acoustic, no bass anymore) and piano. I work in theater and dance, so I'd be suprised if our kids didn't want to take acting or dance classes. But DH is also getting his PhD in Archeology, so our kids will most likly spend their summers in other countries with he and I at his digs!

Sunshine

03-23-2006, 08:38 AM

[COLOR="purple"]Yup, before they really knew what IBS was, it was called Colitis.

uhhhhhh, my Dad's doctor told him that Colitis IS different than IBS......A friend of ours has IBS,so he asked if that was what he had, they told him he has Crohn's and Colitis.....not IBS.
I found this.
Irritable bowel syndrome Vs ulcerative colitis:

1. The most crucial point is that no significant abnormalities like inflammation or ulceration are seen upon examination of the colon in patients with irritable bowel syndrome. But those with ulcerative colitis have inflammation in the colon lining that can be seen by a doctor when the colon is examined.

2. In patients with ulcerative colitis this inflammation may lead to symptoms of diarrhea, but not usually constipation, and not always with abdominal pain. While alternating diarrhea and constipation is hallmark of irritable bowel syndrome.

Another way that ulcerative colitis can be distinguished from IBS is that people with ulcerative colitis may have rectal bleeding, a symptom missing from IBS.

Either way, both are very terrible to have.

honeygirl

03-23-2006, 09:04 AM

But DH is also getting his PhD in Archeology, so our kids will most likly spend their summers in other countries with he and I at his digs!

That's fantastic jnettie! What a great opportunity for your kids to see other cultures and places. I think that travel can really round a child out (adults also). I'm jealous, can we come too? ;)

BlackMagicRose

03-23-2006, 03:25 PM

What activities did you do as a kid? do you plan to introduce your children to those activities?

I was very into science and nature when I was younger. I loved gardening and using the telescope I had at night. I also loved my chemistry set :) I was a geek at a young age. I did a few years of gymnastics and played a bit of basketball. I was also involved in drama and was in the environmental club and the peer mediation club. My favorite thing to do when I was young was ride my bike. I loved it! My FH was a little more active than me. Being from Austria he was a skiier. He also loved hiking and trying out different sports. Like me he also had a garden as a child and loved it!

Our kids will be lucky because they will be bilinguil. I speak English (though I am leaening Germa) and my FH speaks German and English. I think it will be a great advantage to our children. Also, we plan on gardening with them, teaching them science activities, ski and ice skate with them. But we will take their lead....whatever they want to try out, we will try to get them into.

DelSol

03-23-2006, 06:30 PM

uhhhhhh, my Dad's doctor told him that Colitis IS different than IBS......A friend of ours has IBS,so he asked if that was what he had, they told him he has Crohn's and Colitis.....not IBS.
I found this.

Either way, both are very terrible to have.

I know they are different this was before they knew the differences, doctors didn't know what to call it so they called it Colitis, at least that is what we have been told by DH's doctor and my mom agreed because she was diagnosed with Colitis but after telling DH what she experienced, he told her it was probably a case of IBS.

Totally agree both are terrible to have.

tashaw6

03-25-2006, 04:38 AM

What activities did you do as a kid? do you plan to introduce your children to those activities?

Well I did tons of sport...but nothing much cultural! So I wish to have my children doing sport AND a bit of cultural stuff too! :D

stevesbabygirl

03-25-2006, 12:31 PM

I have a new, pseudo-reused question.

QOTD - I know that many of us said that we would wait to tell friends and family. But would you tell your fellow CCers before that? And if so, would you feel badly about not telling your family first?

I know that it's usually pretty wise to hold off on telling people, because of the risk of m/c. I'd love to be able to talk about being pg, but I would almost feel bad if I told fellow CCers before I told my own family, or my DH. Does anyone else feel this way?

PookiePrincess

03-25-2006, 01:11 PM

I know that many of us said that we would wait to tell friends and family. But would you tell your fellow CCers before that? And if so, would you feel badly about not telling your family first?

I think I would have to. I'm not good at keeping secrets AT ALL. If I don't tell CC, I'll have to tell IRL people before I'm ready. I'd really like to keep a pregnancy between DH and I for a while IRL, but I know I'd be talking about it on here. This is my venting place, I'd have to share! I think part of me would feel bad that CC will know before our families, but I don't think it would make me feel too bad.

LeslieandPaul

03-25-2006, 01:38 PM

I have the same answer as PookiePrincess.

BlackMagicRose

03-25-2006, 02:07 PM

I know that many of us said that we would wait to tell friends and family. But would you tell your fellow CCers before that? And if so, would you feel badly about not telling your family first?

Ouch! That is a tough question...I would have to tell someone other than my FH so I guess I would fess up and tell people on CC. But I guess we will see when the time comes!

dpangel33

03-25-2006, 07:01 PM

I know that many of us said that we would wait to tell friends and family. But would you tell your fellow CCers before that? And if so, would you feel badly about not telling your family first?

I've already been in this situation once and I didn't tell anyone IRL (minus DH) but posted about it "other there". After the mc I got tons of emotional support and advice which I don't think I would have gotten IRL.

stevesbabygirl

03-25-2006, 08:32 PM

You make a very good point dpangel!

Smittenk

03-25-2006, 11:46 PM

I know that many of us said that we would wait to tell friends and family. But would you tell your fellow CCers before that? And if so, would you feel badly about not telling your family first?

I have thought about that and I am not sure if I will post about it or not. I will definitely want to but I would like to wait until three months. We'll see how long I can hold out! I won't feel bad about sharing my news on here (if I decide to) before my family because it is my news to share. I will tell who I want, when I want. I will actually really enjoy it because I like to rebel and I don't normally get the chance to do so! :p

tashaw6

03-26-2006, 03:46 AM

filmgirl7

03-26-2006, 07:13 AM

I know that many of us said that we would wait to tell friends and family. But would you tell your fellow CCers before that? And if so, would you feel badly about not telling your family first?

I will definitely post about it on CC the moment I get a BFP, even if I'm not even at four weeks yet. I will be too excited to not share it with someone (anyone?!) at that point. And I'm sure I'll join the appropriate group of mommies-to-be and create a ticker and everything else. I will probably drive directly to babies are us and start buying little baby clothes. LOL! However, I am hoping to not tell the parents/families until about 10 weeks, just to make sure that things are going well. I would wait until 12 weeks to tell them if I thought we could hide the weight gain for that long.

DelSol

03-26-2006, 08:52 AM

What activities did you do as a kid? do you plan to introduce your children to those activities?

I wasn't involved in many activities so I would have to say, if my children want to be involved in sports or some other activity, I would encourage it.

I know that many of us said that we would wait to tell friends and family. But would you tell your fellow CCers before that? And if so, would you feel badly about not telling your family first?

I'd have to agree w/ Filmgilr7, I'd have to post on CC the moment I get a BFP. I'd wait to tell IRL family & friends just in case something happens but I know there would be a world of support from CC members.

stevesbabygirl

03-26-2006, 11:45 AM

I won't feel bad about sharing my news on here (if I decide to) before my family because it is my news to share. I will tell who I want, when I want

Another great point! Thanks for all the great insight ladies :D!

Sunshine

03-26-2006, 04:52 PM

QOTD - I know that many of us said that we would wait to tell friends and family. But would you tell your fellow CCers before that? And if so, would you feel badly about not telling your family first?
I will post it on lj b/c none of my family are able to read it. I would feel badly if my family found out I was pregnant by reading a post on a public message board , even tho it is my decision who I will tell first.
And b/c I am not good at keeping secrets, i will have to tell someone! LOL!

Janey

03-26-2006, 06:50 PM

Telling CC Before Family...
I've already decided to tell my parents ASAP. If anything happened, I'd want their support. However... I am hoping to tell them together, which means that it may take a couple of weeks for me to tell them because they're not together in Seattle a whole lot (they're married, but have residences in two different states and divide their time between them -- not always on the same schedule). So. I'd "see" the CC people before my parents, so you'd probably get told first.

Well, first after B. He gets to know first-first. The firstest. Whatever. ;)

tashaw6

03-26-2006, 10:49 PM

Well, first after B. He gets to know first-first. The firstest. Whatever. ;)

LOL!

eli1126

03-28-2006, 08:55 AM

I know that many of us said that we would wait to tell friends and family. But would you tell your fellow CCers before that? And if so, would you feel badly about not telling your family first?

I would tell DH before I told anyone else, I don't know that I would post on CC until we told our families. Like someone else posted, I wouldn't want people to find out online.

Beth

BlackMagicRose

03-28-2006, 11:00 AM

Can I ask the question of the day?? I do not know if anyone has asked this yet:

If you could pick a month for your child(ren)s birthdays which would you pic and why? Any months you would want to avoid and why?

In a perfect world I would have my first baby in late October, or early November (I would love a Halloween baby!!) and my second would come three years later in May. My grandfather's birthday is in May and I love the May birthstone!!

I would like to avoid having a baby in January and February just because those are the most snowy months. I have had nightmares of falling on ice while pregnant so that could have something to do with me being afraid of those months.

But really none of this matters as long as my future babies are happy and healthy!!! Just fun questions ;)

BrownEyedGirl

03-28-2006, 11:12 AM

Would you tell your fellow CCers before that? And if so, would you feel badly about not telling your family first?

I think I would have to. Well, at least before I told my ILs. I think my order would be as follows... 1st DH, 2nd-4th my mom, my dad, my SIL, CC (not sure of the order for those), 5th MIL/FIL, 6th my boss, 7th everyone else. I would would want the support if something happened. I have a feeling that my SIL and CC would probably come before my parents. I get too excited to keep stuff in...I also get too paranoid to not be able to ask questions.

If you could pick a month for your child(ren)s birthdays which would you pic and why? Any months you would want to avoid and why?

I would have to say June or August. They are nice months...and no one else in the family has birthdays then. But at this point I think any month would be a-okay with me.

artist

03-28-2006, 11:25 AM

Would you tell your fellow CCers before that? And if so, would you feel badly about not telling your family first?

(I am assuming the question is about telling people you're pregnant, not telling people you're TTC, right? Because I would not tell anyone except DH I was TTC simply because I would not want to be annoyed by nosy people asking, "So, has it happened yet" every month.)

I would tell DH before anyone. I could see myself saying something in my journal (or this thread...whatever volume of "Ladies In Waiting" we are on) before people IRL. However, I could imagine myself blurting out to a couple of real close friends before anyone else. I think eventually I would of course tell my family. Would I feel bad? Not really. Why not?

I sort of told my entire French class I was engaged before I told my family! Why? Well, DH (then FH) wanted me to hold off on telling people I guess until he could afford the ring. Fine, but the thing is, I was engaged and really excited about it. I really wanted to tell my family! Then about a week later in my French class we were discussing vocabulary pertaining to being engaged and getting married. So, my French professor asked the question in French, "Do you have a fiance?" and I prayed she wouldn't point to me, but she did! So, I basically answered, "Um, sort of? I mean yes." She just shook her head really confused, everyone looked at me really funny and she moved on with the class. Another girl in the class came up to me at the end of class and asked me to explain because she thought it was so funny. So I did, and she and I ended up being really great friends. Actually, she recited a poem at our wedding.

If you could pick a month for your child(ren)s birthdays which would you pic and why? Any months you would want to avoid and why?

No earlier than April, but not too much later. If we got pregnant around the time of our anniversary or heck my birthday (both in July) then we'd probably have the kid around April. April is DH's birthday. He thinks that would be cool to have a kid around the time of his birthday.

I think it would be nice to not be extremely pregnant in hot hot weather, yet also give birth in spring or early summer so that I would like the idea of walking around outside with the stroller and be able to get the weight off easily. Plus, if for some reason I suffered from post-pardem depression, at least it would be spring and not the god awful Minnesota winter.

Janey

03-28-2006, 11:41 AM

Artist, that's a great story. :)

We are avoiding November, December, January, and February. There are birthdays & holidays every 2-3 weeks in those months already in our family, and we've just basically said: No More! That is actually how we came up with the idea of June to start TTC. If we got pregnant in June, my due date would be at the end of March (March 22, Ovusoft says today).

Also... I've been wanting a right-hand ring in the baby's birthstone, and Aquamarines are my favorites. So I'm hoping for a first-month pregnancy. If it doesn't happen, I won't be crushed... I'd just be very happy if it did. ;)

LeslieandPaul

03-28-2006, 12:25 PM

If you could pick a month for your child(ren)s birthdays which would you pic and why? Any months you would want to avoid and why?

Ideally, no babies between October and January (too many birthdays or holidays in there). I would like to have a baby between February and June. I think May would be ideal.

honeygirl

03-28-2006, 12:31 PM

If you could pick a month for your child(ren)s birthdays which would you pic and why? Any months you would want to avoid and why?

I'd like to avoid December (which is why we'll be extra careful this cycle), October and November.

I'm hoping for a March, April, May or June baby. However, since we're TTC next cycle (may) we may be blessed with an earlier baby and that would be fine (January, February).

Smittenk

03-28-2006, 01:04 PM

If you could pick a month for your child(ren)s birthdays which would you pic and why? Any months you would want to avoid and why?

I would love a baby born in February, April, July or October....just because I have met people born in those months that I really liked!! But honestly...as long we don't have a christmas baby I will be thrilled.

raven077

03-28-2006, 01:11 PM

My mom and I are October babies. I love that month. Mom is actually a Halloweenie baby. :D So if we want one of those we have to try in what... January? February?

Janey

03-28-2006, 01:35 PM

January conception = October baby. :)

here is an Online Due Date Calculator (http://www.tryingtoconceive.com/eddc.htm), in case anybody wants to play with it. Lord knows I have!! :p I like this one because it gives you an option of doing your due date by your ovulation date instead of your LMP, which is more accurate.

PookiePrincess

03-28-2006, 03:01 PM

If you could pick a month for your child(ren)s birthdays which would you pic and why? Any months you would want to avoid and why?

Well, in a perfect world my first baby would be born the very first week of April. Then I could take maternity leave for 6 weeks, go back to teaching for the last 2 weeks of school and then be off for the summer.

I'd also be okay with a summer baby. I was born in January and was always not happy that I could never have a pool party for my birthday. I'd hate to have a baby during the holidays because then their birthday gets lost in the holidays. My birthday is 3 weeks after Christmas and I still feel like I get jipped.

ETA: And living in Texas, I'd hate to be hugely pregnant in July/August when it's 100 degrees outside. It's bad enough being uncomfortable, but not wanting to go anywhere because it's so hot would drive me nuts!

But, like you guys have said, I'll take what I can get!

betsyboop

03-28-2006, 03:52 PM

I haven't posted here in a million years, but I am back because we're getting close to our ttc month (May) and I'm getting excited/nervous!

In an ideal word, I wouldn't have a fall or early winter baby. My sister was a fall baby and it was always an issue that she was the youngest kid in her grade. I wouldn't want my kid the have to be the oldest in the grade either. And then, early winter just because of Chistmas. Then, also May/June are tough months because of Mother's Day, father's Day and my mom's, dad's, 2 SIL's, my best friend's, and my birthdays. Plus Memorial weekend and 4th of July make that time of year SUPER busy.

Obviously, there isn't much time left after all of those less-than-ideal times, so we're really not going to specifically avoid any time. But we are going to start ttcing at the end of May, which is the start of the "good" time of year for us and hopefully I'll get pregnant before we have to worry about having a fall baby:)

SQ2

03-28-2006, 05:42 PM

I know that many of us said that we would wait to tell friends and family. But would you tell your fellow CCers before that? And if so, would you feel badly about not telling your family first?

DH would be the first one to know about a BFP. I could see posting in my LJ about testing and possibly on here too, but DH would definitely be told first, and then I'd probably hop online. :D Parents would be the next people IRL we'd tell and probably my sister too. (She is actually the only person IRL that knows when we are TTC.)

raven077

03-29-2006, 06:11 AM

stevesbabygirl

03-29-2006, 01:25 PM

If you could pick a month for your child(ren)s birthdays which would you pic and why? Any months you would want to avoid and why?

I'd like a spring baby, like April or May. My birthday is in May, and I love that it's almost equal times between Christmas for gifts :p. I know, I'm like 5 years old, but I always felt badly for people who were born in December, which is a month I would not want a baby to be born in.

Sunshine

03-29-2006, 02:39 PM

If you could pick a month for your child(ren)s birthdays which would you pic and why? Any months you would want to avoid and why?

If I could pick a month, I would say any month between May and September. I am a summer baby, and I LOVED having my birthday in the summer. Pool parties, trampolines etc.....May-Sept are really nice and warm months:)
The months I would want to avoid would be Nov, Dec, Jan.....just Too much going on in those months.....Thats it:p

Either way, I just want a baby:p LOL!

DelSol

03-29-2006, 04:06 PM

If you could pick a month for your child(ren)s birthdays which would you pic and why? Any months you would want to avoid and why?

I'm avoiding August because we have so many in August as it. I'd like any time between April - June. This way the warmer months are coming and more time to be able to spend outside.

filmgirl7

03-30-2006, 06:43 PM

Hi guys,
I just got back from spending the day with my pregnant SIL and a friend of the family who has 2 kids and is preg. with her third. (It was a family gathering because DH's grandma died.) Anyway, naturally we were talking about babies, natural births and such, and I asked what it was like to have the epidural. I wondered whether you could feel anything like if you have to go to the bathroom. She said that you can't feel anything, and you have to have a catheter if you have the epidural. I was like :eek: WHAT?!?!? I could feel the blood drain from my face...and I said "I'm not doing that!" It really upset me. I mean, the idea of having a natural birth is extremely frightening to me, but have to have a catheter if I have an epidural is almost just as bad! IMHO, nothing should go up THERE!!!! I'm so freaked. I"m rethinking this whole thing.
Has anyone heard about this? I am petrified of peopl doing things to my body that I don't know about, can't control, and don't want (like the episiotomy, which i'm NOT DOING!) I'm starting to think i'm just never having kids. ACK! Help!!

filmy

stevesbabygirl

03-30-2006, 06:53 PM

All I know is that they had better put it in and take it out before I get the chance to feel it, or I'm going to be very unhappy.

Janey

03-30-2006, 07:16 PM

Filmgirl7, I'm sorry to hear about your DH's grandmother.

I've had a catheter before during surgery. They took it out while I was in recovery (they wanted to make sure I could urinate on my own before I left). I'm a HUGE wuss when it comes to pain, and I'll tell you from my own experience that it's not as big of a deal as you might think it would be.

Smittenk

03-30-2006, 10:01 PM

I totally understand how you're feeling filmgirl7! My good friend is pregnant...due at the beginning of May. She has been doing all these baby/pre natal classes and I have learned alot! When she first found out she was pregnant she was all for the drugs...after the classes she decided she is going to try it naturally because she is so frightened of the epidural! After hearing everything she has learned I am thinking I might try going natural when it is my turn too.

raven077

03-31-2006, 06:15 AM

Just FYI, an epidural isn't as bad as you might think. I had one for my back problems (it refers to the procedure, not the drugs so I didn't become numb or anything). It was the last part of a regimine that involved different cortizone/steroid shots that never ended up working. I'm deathly afraid of needles but was able to survive it. I also think that when you're in the middle of labor, THAT pain overrides anything else. Even fear.

Now a catheter on the other hand...Yuck. I'm trying to remember if my good friend had one or not (I was in the room with her during the labor/birth). I'll have to ask.. I would imagine, Yes, since she did have an epidural.

Personally, I'm not sure yet. I had always thought, "Go for the epidural! Are you crazy?" But I seem to have a pretty high threshold for pain, so I might see what I can stick out. Who knows.

MrsWilson

03-31-2006, 07:36 AM

Just some FYI on the catheter, usually it is an in-and-out catheter. This means just what it sounds like and not in the whole time, unless you have a c-section. Most women don't feel it at all, except the decrease pressure when the bladder is emptied. Before the epidural, usually you are asked to use the bathroom. The catheter is for after the epidural is placed. Too much of a risk to let a woman who can't feel her legs try to walk!

Personally, since I have seen the L&D process while I was in nursing school, I'm am a lot less worried about how things are done. Seeing an epidural put in calmed many of my fears. And talking to the CRNA (Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetist) and the mother-to-be answered all my questions. The best advice I got was to ask questions! For example, the medication in the epidural is usually two things, a numbing medicine and a pain medicine. I friend of mine found out when she had her first child that she was allergic to the pain medicine (nothing serious, just made her itch), so with her second child, she told them not to put that in the epidural. The numbing medicine worked great and she had no problems.

Sunshine

03-31-2006, 10:37 AM

I am TOTALLY against epidurals.
Pretty well all of my family and friends have gone through birth w/o it, and not even that, I got freaked out reading what happens when they do it.
I am Not comfortable with something being put inbetween my spine.
My DH doesnt want me to rule it out, but I already have.

stevesbabygirl

03-31-2006, 10:49 AM

Sunshine, the needle doesn't actually go into your spinal cord, that could cause serious damage. Your spinal cord stops at the level of about your L1-L2 vertebrae, and they put the needle in the L4-L5 spot. The name epidural means that it's above the dura, the protective membrane around your spinal cord. Even with spinal anesthesia, they don't put it in your spinal cord.

Sunshine

03-31-2006, 01:24 PM

stevesbabygirl

03-31-2006, 01:29 PM

Haha, no worries :).

Sunshine

03-31-2006, 01:32 PM

....and it is only 13 days away from seeing you on Dr Phil too right? April 13th?
I actually have a sticky note on my fridge to remind me to watch b/c I dont normally watch:)

eli1126

04-01-2006, 07:18 AM

Now a catheter on the other hand...Yuck. I'm trying to remember if my good friend had one or not (I was in the room with her during the labor/birth). I'll have to ask.. I would imagine, Yes, since she did have an epidural.

My sister had epidurals for both nieces and she only had the catheter inserted for DN 1 because it was a powerful epidural drug used and she couldn't walk after. For DN 2 she did not have a catheter inserted after her epidural, so I think it really depends on the medication used.
I also had a catheter when I had my small bowel resect due to Crohn's inflammation and really it wasn't that bad. To be honest, it wasn't really a big deal at all.

Beth

PookiePrincess

04-01-2006, 08:05 AM

I've lurked in some threads on here about natural childbirth, and I'd really like to try it. I've always said that I'd have an epidural, hands down. I really don't know what I'll do in that situation. I'd love to try the natural, but don't know if I could handle all the pain. I guess we'll have to see!

raven077

04-01-2006, 08:59 AM

I also had a catheter when I had my small bowel resect due to Crohn's inflammation and really it wasn't that bad. To be honest, it wasn't really a big deal at all.

Awesome, that's good to hear. It just sounds so distasteful, but I guess it truly is just routine. Thanks for sharing. :)

Ooh! PookiePrincess, we were date twins! Here's to October weddings.

BlackMagicRose

04-01-2006, 09:55 AM

I am going to wait as long as I can before I get an epidural. I heard there is a certain point at which they will not give you one (if your almost fully dialated). I am not sure if that is true or not, but some times the epidural can actually slow down the dialation. So if I could make it to 6 or 7 I think that would be good, but more than likely I am going to take advantage of all the drugs that I can!!!!!

PookiePrincess

04-01-2006, 10:21 AM

Ooh! PookiePrincess, we were date twins! Here's to October weddings.

Hey, I never realized that! Cool! :D

eli1126

04-01-2006, 01:16 PM

Awesome, that's good to hear. It just sounds so distasteful, but I guess it truly is just routine. Thanks for sharing. :)

ITA! It's one of those things that sounds worse than it actually is :D I hope my tone didn't come across as harsh, I was typing quickly this morning and when I re-read what I posted, I thought I came across much differently than I intended.

If you could pick a month for your child(ren)s birthdays which would you pic and why? Any months you would want to avoid and why?

I would like to plan a summer baby. I, (hopefully) will have a teaching job and wouldn't mind an Oct-July or Nov-Aug pregnancy. The only months I am absolutely opposed to trying for is one with a due date in Nov, Dec, Jan. I am a November baby and my mom has said it was more difficult because of the weather, holidays, and the scrambling around factor thrown into the mix. She said having my sister in April was easier because they were able to get out and enjoy the nicer weather.

Beth

raven077

04-02-2006, 11:54 AM

eli1126, nope, no worries. (thanks for checking though) :D

As for If you could pick a month for your child(ren)s birthdays which would you pic and why? Any months you would want to avoid and why?... Well, I've mentioned somewhere before that I really love fall and would love to have a September/October baby.. Even though that would mean DH's bday, my bday, my mom's bday, godmother's bday and a couple of friends to boot.. It's just such a beautiful time, that I can't help it! But I also wouldn't be opposed to an early spring baby either. I guess we'll have to wait and see what we're lucky enough to achieve when the time comes. If it ends up taking a while, I think we'll just be happy to conceive anytime! :)

stevesbabygirl

04-02-2006, 05:22 PM

Yep, catheters are quite routine. I work in surgery, and if the procedure goes longer than an hour or so, we catheterize them. I still cringe at it though; they're so uncomfortable to me. I'm going to see if I can get away with not having one with my epidural.

DelSol

04-02-2006, 05:36 PM

Thanks for the heads up on the catheter, never knew it.

I'm going to have to ask my sister but will only ask her once I am PG, don't want to cause any suspicions since I am not PG.

I was reading a thread about giving birth and it literally scared the day lights out of me. Everything you need to know about childbirth (http://www.constantchatter.com/showthread.php?t=15958)

stevesbabygirl

04-02-2006, 05:57 PM

I like those threads, because I'd rather know beforehand what I'm getting myself into :p. I'd hate to be surprised with some of that stuff.

PookiePrincess

04-02-2006, 06:01 PM

Yep, you should read the natural childbirth thread. It'll scare the crap out of you, but has lots of information!

DelSol

04-03-2006, 04:52 AM

Hmm I'm gonna have to find the natural childbirth thread.

stevesbabygirl

04-03-2006, 10:25 AM

DelSol

04-03-2006, 11:25 AM

I had my pre-conception appointment today :D! Got some prenatals, which have 1mg of folic acid, rather than the standard 400mcg that regular vitamins have. It's also a small pill, and has something in it to prevent me from getting sick off of them. They thought of everything!

Yeah Heather! Your time will be here soon!

What kind were you given? I was given an Rx but they made me sick so now I am taking over the counter prenatals and I don't get sick.

DansGirl

04-03-2006, 11:48 AM

Hi ladies - I haven't been in here awhile but thought I should pop in and say I've graduated!!!! DH & I were originally going to wait until this fall, but decided what the hay - we'll start this month. Woo Hoo!!! As excited as I am though (and as much fun as we're having trying :o ), I'm still anxious as all get out - but in a really great way - for this whole TTC/Pregnancy/childbirth/child raising thing. Wish us luck!

stevesbabygirl

04-03-2006, 03:05 PM

DelSol, my doctor prescribed the PreCare vitamins. They were super easy to swallow, but I now have this kind of burning sensation at the bottom of my esophagus. So much for that buffered vitamin C :p!

Congrats DansGirl :D! Moving you to the graduate section!

eli1126

04-04-2006, 08:10 AM

As much as reading childbirth threads can make me a little nervous, I want to prepare myself for all possibilities. When my family gets together the women will talk about childbirth and female things (usually we have at least 1 pg woman in the family right now we have 2). My MIL always kills me because she's always quick to say "Why would you want to see/know about that?" Umm, because women today are much more educated and in-tune with their bodies and want to know what's going on.

Something else I wanted to bring up: C-Sections. I know most of us aren't planning or opting for one (although sometimes after a particularly gruesome episode of "A Baby Story" or similar shows, I think it might not be all that bad..)

QOTD: When the time comes do you see yourself reading up on what goes on during a C-section just in case?

My friend who had her DD last July read all/only about vaginal deliveries because she thought "There is no reason why I shouldn't be able to deliver vaginally." (I use the term vaginally to differentiate between medicated birth and a natural birth with no medications) After her ob/gyn noticed the baby was in distress, she had to have an emergency C-Section. After she said she wished she would have at least just looked over the C-Section material so that she knew what was going to happen if something went wrong. I thought that made sense, but after talking with some other women though they expressed the sentiment that if you set yourself up for a C-section, then you may not be as insisitent on a vaginal/natural delivery. Any thoughts...

Beth

DelSol

04-04-2006, 10:02 AM

QOTD: When the time comes do you see yourself reading up on what goes on during a C-section just in case?

I plan to do some heavy reading on the topic. My mom tried to have me vaginally but she was too small to push me out even though fully dilated so they had to do a c-section, back then they totally knocked you out, nurses woke you up saying it's a [insert sex of baby] and there was your baby. She had a scheduled c-section with my sister. Now my sister went naturally with meds and didn't need a c-section but was only a few minutes away from one, they finally got my niece out with the vacuum and forceps, poor little girl had bruises on her face.

I haven't read the natural childbirth thread and only skimmed through the c-section thread but reading “Everything you need to know about Childbirth”, make me wonder what I really want. I understand c-sections are a major surgery but do you have all the bleeding afterwards with a vaginally birth. I can’t handle a lot of blood.

That's all I can think of now but I'm sure there will be more.

BlackMagicRose

04-04-2006, 12:39 PM

QOTD: When the time comes do you see yourself reading up on what goes on during a C-section just in case? I have a BS in Human Development and Family Studies. We covered c-sections breifly so I know some about what happens. I will definetly review the information just in case. I want to be as prepared as I can be. I really hope for a vaginal delivery thought since the recovery time for a c-section is so much longer.

Sunshine

04-04-2006, 12:49 PM

QOTD: When the time comes do you see yourself reading up on what goes on during a C-section just in case?
Simply short & Sweet.....Yes:)

PookiePrincess

04-04-2006, 04:01 PM

QOTD: When the time comes do you see yourself reading up on what goes on during a C-section just in case?

Absolutely. I don't see it as setting yourself up for opting for a c-section easier. I just see it as being prepared. I want to know what goes on. It would be awful for me to go into labor expecting a vaginal delivery and then go home having had a c-section, not being prepared that there will be no activity/lifting/cooking/cleaning/etc for several weeks. It makes me feel better knowing that should it come to a c-section, I'd know what goes on during one and the recovery it involves.

laurenc

04-04-2006, 08:56 PM

out of town for a week and this thread explodes!

QOTD: When the time comes do you see yourself reading up on what goes on during a C-section just in case?

yep, and ditto to what others said about being prepared.

If you could pick a month for your child(ren)s birthdays which would you pic and why? Any months you would want to avoid and why?

i once had an answer to this, but now i don't. i used to think a late fall/early winter baby would be "ideal" because i wouldn't be too pregnant in the sweltering heat of summer, but now i've come to the conclusion that i don't really care that much...

elissa

04-05-2006, 08:58 PM

QOTD: When the time comes do you see yourself reading up on what goes on during a C-section just in case? Not really, I know I have to have one based on previous surgery.

I did however, just spend time talking with a friend who is a midwife on all the reasons someone has one of those. Interesting, I thought they were more for natural vaginal deliveries, but really they are more of the mother to be's advocate during the labor.

jnettie

04-06-2006, 08:47 AM

QOTD: When the time comes do you see yourself reading up on what goes on during a C-section just in case?
Sometimes, I feel like I'm an ostrich with her head in the sand. I don't want to know anything at all about c-sections...especially if I have to have one! Surgery freaks me out!

My mom had to have a c-section with me, and you'd think it was the easiest thing in the world from what she says. I was breech, so she had to have a c-section. It only took a 1/2 hour and she was only in labor for 2 hours total. Then, she says that she actually recovered faster than the ladies who had NCB. (Now, since I was born 3 weeks overdue, yet mom knew that she had to have a c-section, I have no idea why one wasn't scheduled. Perhaps they didn't do that in the 70's?)

If you could pick a month for your child(ren)s birthdays which would you pic and why? Any months you would want to avoid and why?
I don't want to have any children in December. My birthday is in December and I hate hate hate all the cheepskates who like to give me "one really nice gift" for Christmas AND Birthday, for 2 reasons: 1)everyone else in the world gets 2 nice gifts and 2) the cheepskates who say they're giving me 1 nice gift are usually giving me one crapy gift.

(Not that I'm greedy or selfish! :p Just something that bugs me! Ask anyone with a birthday close the Christmas and they'll say the same thing!)

artist

04-06-2006, 09:18 AM

When the time comes do you see yourself reading up on what goes on during a C-section just in case?

Sure, maybe a little, but not if the book contains graphic photos or illustrations of it! Actually, I don't really want to know too much about the birthing process in general. (Well, not now anyway. The more friends want to go and on and on about their birthing stories, the less I feel like ever having sex again!)

December27JJB

04-07-2006, 06:01 PM

Subscribing:

Me: Jessica 27
DH: Josh 28
DD: Parker 9 1/2 months
Married: 12/2003
TTC#2: Sept/Oct 2007

QOTD: When the time comes do you see yourself reading up on what goes on during a C-section just in case?

I am guilty of not doing that. With DD the doctors kept telling me she was head down and I really really didnt think I'd end up with a c-section. But when I was 8 cm dilated they 'discovered' DD had flipped the other way and settled in the breech position and called in for an unexpected c-section. It was honestly the most terrifying moment of my life. Not educating myself about what if I end up with a c-section basically ruined the entire birth of DD. I was so scared out of my mind that I started shaking and I couldnt relax enough to really realize that my little girl was being born. Because of that, I am going to attempt VBAC next time. But I probably read about what goes on during a c-section just to educate myself further.

QOTD: If you could pick a month for your child(ren)s birthdays which would you pic and why? Any months you would want to avoid and why?

June/July because DD was born in June (she was due in July--came 3 weeks early) I think we will aim for another June/July baby. Just in case it is another girl I can use all of DD's clothes.

BlackMagicRose

04-07-2006, 07:01 PM

Hi Jessica! Welcome to the thread! This has been good support for me so far!I think your daughter's name is so pretty! You should start a journal!

stevesbabygirl

04-07-2006, 10:58 PM

Welcome December27JJB :D!

December27JJB

04-08-2006, 05:48 PM

Thank you BlackMagicRose and Stevesbabygirl! I do have a journal on LJ if you want to friend me I am December27JJB over there. ;)

I am glad to hear that this is a supportive thread! I need all the support I can get as DD's 1st birthday is approaching and I am missing having a little baby. There are days when I want to say screw it and start TTC but in reality, right now is not the best time for us. Other times I am glad we are nowhere near TTC because DD is already handful! :D

stevesbabygirl

04-08-2006, 06:08 PM

I friended you :D!

December27JJB

04-08-2006, 07:06 PM

stevesbabygirl- I friended you too! Thanks!

eli1126

04-09-2006, 09:59 AM

December27JJB Thank you for sharing your story, it brings home the importance of being prepared for any possibility.

stevesbabygirl My DVR is all set for tomorrow! If you don't mind my asking, what has been your parents/IL'S reaction to all of this?

Beth

stevesbabygirl

04-09-2006, 11:11 AM

Beth, parents and ILs were very excited about it! I was afraid they would be mortified, but they are both huge Dr. Phil fans, so it went over very well.

DelSol

04-09-2006, 01:19 PM

Welcome to the new ladies!

Heather, I wonder if you can record it with a camcorder and then link it so we can watch it? I know I have seen people do that on here.

Smittenk

04-09-2006, 03:01 PM

Heather, I wonder if you can record it with a camcorder and then link it so we can watch it? I know I have seen people do that on here.

Ooh Ooh if you can do this please do!! I am dying to watch it and we get the shows over here much later...it probably would n't be shown until the Fall over here :(

stevesbabygirl

04-09-2006, 05:09 PM

My digital camera does have recording abilities, so I'll have to do that!

Janey

04-09-2006, 05:17 PM

Heather - I thought it was the 13th? Are you going to be on the show TOMORROW??

DelSol

04-09-2006, 05:38 PM

Heather, that would be great if you could do that!

BrownEyedGirl

04-10-2006, 08:07 AM

OMG! Dh and I sort of had a conversation about TTC...and he said "probably this fall" so I said "how about June" and his aswer was "okay" I nearly fell over!!! I'm still in disbelief! So I asked him today when he called if he really meant okay to June and he said "I think so". OMG, OMG, OMG. Now I am terrified!

stevesbabygirl

04-10-2006, 11:15 AM

That's awesome :D!

My Dr. Phil show is on today!

DelSol

04-10-2006, 11:38 AM

Heather~ found this for you on Dr. Phil's website:
http://www.drphil.com/shows/show/702

Can't wait to see more about the show, hopefully his webiste will show a recap.

stevesbabygirl

04-10-2006, 12:12 PM

Thanks Dana, that was cool :D! We never gave each other ultimatums though, so I have no idea why he said that.

lawyerlee

04-10-2006, 01:30 PM

It's been ages since I participated in this thread. I guess I'd been doing okay with my baby bug. But not anymore! :o

I spent the weekend with family, including my cousin and her 5 week old baby boy. OMG, I now have raging lust for a baby. I don't even know what to do with myself. I haven't said anything to Cliff because I know he'll be caught off guard, but I really want to get ourselves in a financial position to be ready to TTC.

Of course, my health is an issue. I have chronic migraines, and I'm on quite a few meds to try to control them. I need to have a conversation with my PCP about that, I guess.

It's just insane how feeling this way takes over your brain. :eek:

Julss05

04-10-2006, 02:19 PM

Darn I missed the show! Will it be replayed? I meant to record it. It's been forever since I stopped by here too because life has been crazy. We are 65%done with our kitchen remodel, just waiting on the countertop installers so we can start on the floor. DH got the job he wanted! If you remember he said we could TTC this summer if he got the job so I'm happy about that:). It's a big pay increase which will help a lot. Unfortuently I'm thinking of leaving my job soon, it's not what I thought it was. I've interviewed for other jobs but I don't have a lot of work experience in the field I'm trying to get into so it's hard. I've decided to use an employment agency because they've worked in the past to help get my foot in the door. We were hoping my new job would help financially especially since I'd have my own health insurance but I'm going to just get back on DH's. Basically our goal before TTC was to get the kitchen done, credit debt paid off, and gain stability in our careers. It's slowly coming along but not quite there. I just hope we can still start TTC this summer or at least sometime this year!