Choosing my Religion

Despite the fact that my mothers family is Catholic, and that I have a great uncle who is a Monsignor, I grew up outside of the Catholic faith. I also grew up with many pre-conceived notions of the Catholic Church. And then, I married a Catholic.

Admittedly, he wasn’t practicing when we began dating, so it wasn’t a big deal. I too, had not been practicing in any church for years. I was raised with my father’s family and I grew up in a variety of churches. Church was rather forced upon us, but I was a good girl, and fell in line. Thankfully, in high school, I went to a church that had a great youth group. It was a good group, and I’m still in email contact with one of the girls today. But there were some issues with that church. They fired one Youth Pastor to make way for a family friend, shocking and hurting the youth that were attending the church. After high school, I continued attending – this time with the college aged young adults. I often was made to feel badly, however, by others my age. I was judged because I could not attend church every week. I worked in a restaurant at the time, and as many know, restaurants are busy on Sundays. Despite the fact that they enjoyed lunches after church every week, I was criticized for not being at church. Then our pastor was arrested for soliciting an undercover police officer. That was the straw that broke the camels back for me, in regards to seeking out organized religion at that time in my life.

After that, I attended church sporadically at best - weddings, funerals, and even once after 9/11. Still, it wasn’t something that I wanted to be a part of.

That changed after our newborn son died. I had a sudden longing to return to church. And I wanted my husband to come with me. He agreed, and we went to his childhood church, a Catholic Church with his brother and sister-in-law.

He was comfortable there, and I could appreciate the beauty of the mass. I could appreciate the history. And mostly, I could appreciate the fact that there was an order. I needed structure; I needed to know what was coming next. And that’s what we found.

In time, we tried out the church we were married in. Briefly, it wasn’t a good fit. I knew that the churches of my childhood were not the churches that I wanted to attend, nor was it something that my husband would enjoy either.

We’ve attended mass nearly every Sunday since August 2005. I’ve grown to not just be comfortable, but to love the traditions of mass as well.

And last spring, I made the decision that I wanted to be Catholic as well. This past fall, I joined in the RCIA (Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults) at our local parish. Every week we have met – to learn about the Catholic faith

With Lent beginning on Ash Wednesday (February 21st), excitement is building for me. I am excited to be joining the Catholic Church, to be able to receive all the Sacraments. Yes, the girl with so many pre-conceived notions of the Catholic faith is now the woman excited to join the Catholic Church.

This time, it hasn’t been forced upon me. This time, I am choosing my religion.

JennyLou